Saturday, 29 February 2020

THE TOON 0 THE BORNLEY HILLBILLIES 0 **** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2019-2020

Posted '10:37pm bells' Saturday 29th February 2020
Will be updated sometime on Sunday!
VIEW FROM THE MILBURN STAND BALCONY

"WE CAN ANLY SAVE WORSELS!"

A chaotic weekend (up til now!) meenz that despite a goalless draw and a point against 'The Hillbillies' of Bornley this afternoon, unexpected results elsewhere meenz that we are now closer to the bottom 3 than we were on Friday afternoon!

This iz because bottom club Nohrich beat 3rd placed Lestaa at Carrow Road on Friday neet, West Ham won 3-1 against Sooothampton today, and relegation threatened Wotfaad beat undefeated champions elect Liverpoool 3-0 at Vicarage Road this evenin'!----Who could have predicted that??? 

On Friday afternoon NUFC were 7 points clear of 3rd bottom----but now we are just 5 points above 'the abyss' with just ONE win in the last TEN Premyaa Leegue games!

Wor 4th consecutive 'blank' meenz that we are now the lowest goalscorers in the 'top flight' with just 24 goals from 28 games!!!

Wot a sad state of affairs for a club that were dubbed 'The Entertainers' not so lang ago!

Reeely, we shud have won this game, but for poor finishin', NUFC couldn't 'finish off' a team who had most definitely come for a bore draw and a point to take back to 'Hillbillieland in deepest Lancashire!!
Matt Ritchie had chances to 'win it', but several blocks of shots and a last minute attempt where he shud have scored at The Leazes End came to nothin', az we went 360 minutes withoot a goal in The Premyaa Leegue! (accordin' to the 'stats' NUFC had 20 shots on goal aaltogether, with not one gannin in!)  A slightly better performance than the last few games---but NEE goals again!
  52,000 plus had came for this game (allegedly!)---that's 2,000 Bornley fans in 'level 7' of The Leazes End, anothaa 10,000 'freebee' Toon fans, plus 40,000 Toon fans who had actually paid to watch this game, which will surely be last on 'Match of the Day' again! (2nd last actually!)

Wor 'beloved'? owner 'The Fat Controller' woz missin' from hiz seat in the directors box yet again, leavin' the rest of us to suffer the dreadful 'misfirin' fare' on the pitch!-----We can anly save worsels and NOT rely on othaa teams losin', if we are to avoid the 'dreaded drop'!

OH for a 'number 9' like £15 million poond Alan Shearer, who scored 206 goals for NUFC----unlike wor current £40 million poond 'number 9', who haz scored a paltry ONE goal in 28 Premyaa Leegue appearences this season! (He played much deeper 'on the left', than usual today, az 'Broken Nose Bruce' put Dwight Gayle up front!)
FANS BANNER AGAINST 'THE FAT CONTROLLER' BEFORE THE MATCH!

THE SAME BANNER ON 'ANT AND DEC'S SATURDAY NEET SHOW' ON THE TELLY!



Toon team line ups and more pix tomorrow! (when we can be bothered!?)

NEXT DAY! '9:43am bells'
Toon team: Dubravka, Manquillo, Fernandez, Lascelles, Rose, Almiron, Hayden, Shelvey, Ritchie, Gayle, Joelinton (Saint-Maximin 78)

Attendance: 52,219 (2,000 'Hillbillies')
This woz the 'alledged' attendance, but there were loads of empty seats and we know of fans who couldn't GIVE spare tickets away!

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