NUFC FIXTURES 2016-2017 *** 'UDDERSFIELD UNCHANGED!"

Posted 'high noon bells' Thorsday 30th Joon 2016

The rumour mongers got it WRANG (see below!) az wor forst game back in the 2nd tier of Inglish futbaall will be away to The *Wacko Jackoless Jivers of Fulham on a FRIDAY neet for live telly  (Train aalready booked!)
*(The Michael Jackson statue that stood ootside Craven Cottage haz been removed!)
Wor forst home game iz against 'uddersfield Toon on the followin' Saturday!

Wor forst home game against 'uddersfield Toon haz NOT been selected for live telly and will be played at the date and time stated below!

We will give yoo the fixtures for 'August only' at this time, az a canny few more are sure to be moved for live telly in the next few days!

NUFC FIXTURES
AUGUST 2016
Home games in GOLD   Away games in PINK
Games in heavy type are 'cast in stone'---

Fri 5th: 'The Wacko Jackoless Jivers' away 7:45 bells SKY

Sat 13th: 'uddersfield Toon' home 3:00 bells

Wed 17th: 'The Biscuitmen of Reading' home 7:45 bells

Sat 20th: 'The Big Bristols' away 3:00 bells (They are a bigger club than Bristol Rovers!) 

w/c Mon 22nd Leegue Cup?

Sat 27th: 'Ne where near Brighton' home 3:00 bells (their groond iz miles away from Brighton!)

Wor forst ever visit to New York iz due to take place on Sat 1st Oct (New York Stadium, Rotherham--that iz!) and we'll be 'goin for a Burton' in mid December (could aall change for live telly of course!) 

More to follow later!

"DON'T MENTION THE VOLCANO!"

Posted 12:50pm bells' Tuesday 28th Joon 2016

In the light of Ing-er-land's disastrous result against Iceland yesterday and 2nd 'brexit' from Europe in fower days,  we make ne apology for diggin' up this classic tale from 2010 (see below!)

RULE BRITANNIA!

Posted '1 minute past high noon bells' Friday 24th Joon 2016

News that we are to leave the disfunctualll EU haz had a mixed reaction!
One worried radio listener asked: "Will we still be able to enter The Eurovision Song Contest!"

Hopefully NOT!

Club participation in European competitions will not be affected however!---NOT that it matters to NUFC at the moment! 

FIXTURES OOT TOMORROW!

Posted '1:45pm bells' Tuesaday 21st Joon 2016

Tomorrow iz the day when reality hits home!
The 'reality' that we are in 'The Championship' playin' the likes of Barnsley, Burton, and Rotherham az the fixtures are due to be released at '9 am bells' precisely! 
TV fixtures will aalso be annoonced at the same time and yoo can bet your bottom dollar that we will be featured at least 20 times next season!
The rumour that we will play Wigan away and Leeds at home in wor forst 2 fixtures will be foond oot az well!

Watch this space intentleeee tomorrow mornin'!!!!

SJP EXPANSION PLANS COULD GAN AHEED

Posted '1:15pm bells' Saturday 18th Joon 2016

"A VIEW TO 'DIE FOR'!---BUT NOT FOR MUCH LONGER!"
("Errr! --The groond that iz!--- not the lassie on the billboard!")

News that plannin' permission haz been given to yet more student accommodation in the car park below St James' Metro station, meenz that wor beloved groond will vitually be suroonded by high rise buildings, obscurin' the view from Gallowgate!

However!---we are told that this WOULD NOT effect any expansion to The Gallowgate End, shud the club decide to build higher at this end of the groond and make it the same height az The Leazes End opposite!

We sincerely hope that this IZ the case az 52,000 iz isn't even big enough for Championship games! (season tickets are gannin like 'hot cakes' az we speak!)
When I waz a young kid in the 1960's (many many! moons ago!) the groond held 60,000 and this would be the ideal capacity of St James' Park!
Lets hope that this eventually happens to give us an even better stadium than we have now!

MORE MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPER NEWS! *** "LETS BE AVEN'UE!"

Posted 1:40pm bells Friday 10th Joon 2016

HORSFALL STADIUM, BRADFORD

A forst team friendly haz been arranged for Wed 20th July away to Donny Rovers---a groond we of course have previously visited.
More importantly though!---a friendly for wor U21 side haz been arranged @ Bradford Park Avenue on Sun 10th July----a groond we have NEVER been te before--- "YAHOOO!" *

"SEASON TICKET FRENZEEEEE!"

Posted '1:17pm bells' Wednesday 8th Joon 2016

THE TICKET OFFICE QUEUE UNDER THE MILBURN STAND! 

Aa went to the NUFC ticket office the othaa day to try and get a season ticket for mee grandson Jamie who iz now 6 years old!
Aa waited nearly an hour in the queue anly to be telt that there were NE seats available anywhere near where aa sit in the balcony area of The Milburn Stand!
"The season ticket deadline is July 1st!---come back then and see if anyone has not renewed near you!", aa waz telt by the lassie ,who alang with seven othaaz waz dealin' with ticket enquiries!

It's unbelievable---isn't it!?---Man City win the Leegue Cup---and they sack their manager!
Man U win the FA Cup---and they sack their manager!
NUFC get RELEGATED---and we BEG wor manager to stay!---AND!---swamp the ticket office with requests for season tickets!!!!

"It BEGGARS belief!" (sic!)

  

OPENIN' FIXTURES FOR NEXT SEASON?

Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 7th Joon 2016


"COMIN' SOON TO AN AWAY GAME NEAR YOO!?---
THE 'DELIGHTS'? OF WIGAN PIER!---
(OR NOT AZ THE CASE MAY BE!)

Rumour haz it that the fixtures for next season have aalready been finalised and that NUFC will be heedin' for the delights of WIGAN for wor forst away game!?
Then we hear that wor forst home game will be against LEEDS?

Az the official fixture list doesn't come oot till Joon 22nd we will aall just have to 'haad wor breath'(s) to find oot IF it iz true (or NOT az the case may be!!!!???)

"BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY!" ("I CAN FEEL A SONG COMIN' ON!")

Updated '11:11am bells' Sunday 5th Joon 2016

'2 bells' on Saturday 16th July haz been pencilled in for wor forst forst team pre season friendly v Bohemians of 'Dublin Toon' @ Dalymount Park in 'The Guinness Republic' < (Hate to say it, but, "been here before!")
Tickets are priced @ fifteen yoorowz but are not on sale yet!---az per usual 'The Geordie Times' will keep yoo fully informed to this and any othaa forthcomin' fixtures!

I can feel a song comin' on!

"AALTOGETHER NOW!"

To the tune of 'The Merry Plough Boy':

"I am a merry Geordie-when I drink Newcasil Brown!
and I went to see United play-The Bohemians of Dublin town!"

Chorus:
"And we all went to Dublin in the black and the white-
to see the Geordie boys!
Yes I went to see my only team-to the echo of the Geordie roars!"

"Now a'v aalways hated sund'lind-since the day that I waz born!
Yes aa'll allways hate the red n whites- the team I love to scorn!"

Chorus!

TAYLOR DOESN'T MAKE THE CUT!

Posted '2:00pm bells' Friday 3rd Joon 2016

News that lang servin' defender Steve Taylor haz had hiz contract terminated by NUFC comes az ne surprise to us!
Past hiz 'sell by date' a 'lang time back' he waz one of the reasons for wor slow demise ower the last fower years!

Keven Mbabu on the othaa hand haz been given a two year extension to his contract and iz a valuable member of the team!

More to follow on 'in's and 'oot's ower the next few days!

NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPER NEWS! **** "STEEL' YOURSELF!!!!"

Posted '12:33pm bells' Wednesday 1st Joon 2016

The forst pre season friendlies have been annoonced involvin' wor resorve/U21 side, who will heed for the delights of Corby Toon's Steel Park for a 4 team weekend tournament in July!

Saturday 23rd July '3;30 bells':
Corby Toon v NUFC X1

Sunday 24th July 'high noon bells':
PSV Eindhoven X1 v NUFC X1

(Aalso playin' on those two days will be a Leeds United X1 who play PSV on the Saturday @ 'high noon bells' and Corby the followin' day @ '3:30 bells')

Tickets for one day are priced @ £15 and £25 for the two days!