Tuesday, 17 May 2022

THE TOON 2 THE ARSE 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon ๐Ÿ””bells' Tuesday 17th May 2022


A BLUE STAR PERFORMANCE!

Eddie Howe's forst game in the dugoot ended in a 2-0 defeat at Arsenal in November when NUFC were rock bottom of The Premyaa Leegue with nee wins at aall!

The Arse fans were quick to condemn and mock us then,  with chants of: "All that money and you're going down!"

Fast forward 6 months and we are 12th in the table after beatin Arsenal 2-0 at SJP for wor 12th win of the season in front of a fanatical flag wavin crowd, with their 3,000 followers in level 7 of The Leazes End, left speechless this time! (With Toon fans retornin' the mockin at The Emirates Stadium,  with chants of: "Champions Leegue!--yi havin a laff!" ๐Ÿ˜ƒ (Thier arch rivals Sporz are now odds on to qualify for the last Champions Leegue place!)



Who wud ever have believed that 6 months ago we wud be halfway up the table?

We went 14 games withoot a win and then just one win in 20 games by mid January, before the amazin tornaroond, starting  with a 1-0 win at Leeedz later that month and then another 10 wins since then!


Before the start of the match, there woz a breathtakin flag display on aall 4 sides of the groond curtesy of 'Wor Flags' and we dominated the norf Landaners from the beginnin to the end, with an own goal by White (after pressure from Callum Wilson) and a shot from Bruno, both goals in the 2nd half az we attacked The Gallowgate End!


Wor best performance of the season by a country mile and the best atmosphere for many a year!

Attendance: 52,274


The anly way iz onwards and upwards!



*'Wor Flags' deserve great credit for the flag displays and it must have taken them ages to put aall the flags and plastic black n white sheets on EVERY home seat!๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘


*



Monday, 16 May 2022

THE TOON v THE ARSE *** TOONEET!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 16th May 2022

"I WOZ BORN UNDER A BIG BLUE STAR!"
PART OF THE 'WOR FLAGS' DISPLAY TOONEET!

NUFC play wor final home game of the season and the great news iz of course that we are safe from the drop and can concentrate on gettin the 3 points to climb the table and not worry wot other teams might dee! (With 2 games to gan the highest we could possibly finish iz 9th---and the lowest iz 15th!)





Wor record against 'The Arse' iz terrible though, az we have won just once in the last 20 attempts and wor visitors have won 18 of the last 19 played!-----SO! 'The Toon' are due a win against them, for sure!

They will be desperate to win to climb above their "norf Landan" rivals Sporz for the final Champions Leegue place, so we will have thoooosands of Sporz fans supportin us on the telly at '8:00 bells' 

Both Kieran Trippier and Callum Wilson are fit again and shud be in the startin line up---we shall see!?


'Wor Flags' are puttin on their biggest ever display and EVERY one of the 49,000 plus, home seats will have a flag on them tooneet! (The Arse have the othaa 3,000)



A Geordie Times match report will appear here az per usual tomorrow sometime-----SO! "Watch this space!"

Friday, 13 May 2022

SPORTSWASHING GEORDIE STYLE!

Posted '12:38 pm bells' Friday 13th May 2022

Much haz been said aboot the NUFC takeower and the word 'sportswashing'---with many Toon fans askin 'The Geordie Times' exactly what the word 'sportswashing' meeenz?
Well!---pleeeze take a look at the picture below for an explanation! 
"NOW THAT'S WOT YOO CAALL 'SPORTSWASHING'!

*

Thursday, 12 May 2022

NUFC---RECORD BREAKERS!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Thorzday 12th May 2022



Leeedz lost 0-3 at home to Chelseee last neet, which meeenz that they cannit now catch us and that NUFC are now officially safe from relegation to 'the abyss'!

It's a remarkable tornaroond by 'Steady Eddie', az we didnt win ANY of wor forst 14 games and anly won one of the forst 20!----The forst time a team haz EVER escaped relegation after such a poor start!

It iz aall doon to one man (and the new owners of course!), who have somehow dragged us from 20th place and wot looked like certain relegation in mid January, to a safe mid table place with two games to spare in mid May!

A TRUELEEEEE REMARKABLE ACHEEEVMENT!




FROM THIS! ON NOVEMBER 30th 2021



TO THIS! ON MAY 11th 2022





Wednesday, 11 May 2022

"COME IN NUMBER 4!---YOUR TIME IZ UP!"

 Posted '5:10pm ๐Ÿ””bells'Wedinzday 11th May 2022




Leaked photos of NUFCs new home and 3rd strip have been released!

To be honest we cannit wait for the new home top with thin black n white stripes and get rid of that horrible thick striped top with the number 4 just below the coller!  It iz aalso a reminder of wor previous owner The Fat Controller, who we need to banish to the history books!



"Good bye and good riddance!:


Tuesday, 10 May 2022

GEORDIE TIMES QUIZ

 Posted '12:47pm ๐Ÿ”” bells' Tuesday 10th May 2022



Apart from wor new owner, can yoo spot anybody yoo naa in the Man City directors box?


CLUE!



Monday, 9 May 2022

THE BLUE MOONIES 5 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

Posted from 'high noon bells' onwards, Munday 9th May 2022



"SO BAD AT THE ET-HI-AD!" (A REALITY CHECK FOR WOR NEW OWNERS!)


We travelled doon in a convoy of a 9 seater transit and a black n white car and arrived in good time! (6 big kids and 4 grandkids!)---We parked not too far from the groond and heeded to central Manchester via a short train ride for a few 'gargels' in 'The Lass of Gowrie' (Just one for me az aa woz one of the drivers!)





It woz then onward back to the groond via tram this time and we were in wor seats 30 mins before the start!

The hope woz that the Man City players would still be 'on a downer' after their dramatic Champions Leegue elimination orlier that week!



However!---It woz the complete opposite of that and they went off at frantic pace straight from the kick off!  Within 5 minutes they'd had 3 great chances to take the lead, but, thankfully they fluffed their lines!

It woz anly a matter of time before they scored and sure enough Sterling heeded home with 19 minutes on the clock!



'The Blue Moonies' could have had at least 3 more goals before they scored their 2nd aboot 5 mins before the break through Laporte after Toon goalie Debravka had spilled the baall! 

NUFC could hardly get oot of wor own half and we were very lucky to gan in just 2 goals to the bad at the break! (It could have easily been 5 or 6)

The 2nd half wozzint much better for us and it woz soon 3-0 through a Rodri heeder from a Bruyne corner just on the hour mark!

Callum Wilson and Kieran Tripper then made an appearance for


The Toon after lang absenses through injury and for a brief time we lokked like we could actually score a goal, but Wilson missed a great chance az we tried to attack towards the goal where the 3,000 Toon fans were housed!----but to no avail!

2 goals in stoppage time for the current Premyaa Leegue champions finished us off and a 5 goal thrashin' woz wot we desorved (Could have been a lot more of course!) Wor worst defeat of the season!

The gulf in class between 'them' and 'us' iz immense and with wor owners lookin on from the directors box, they must surely realise that this woz 'a reality check' and major changes MUST be made in the close season!





Attendance: 53, 336 (3,000 Toons fans who kept on singin' right to the bitter end!)

*NUFC have played here 18 times----lost 0-4 twice, 0-5 thrice and  1-6 once!  Wor anly success woz a 0-2 win in the Leegue Cup in 2014-15 and we have just 2 points to show from wor 17 Premyaa Leegue visits!!!---

Perhaps WE shud rename it 'The DREAD-HI-AD' STADIUM!







Saturday, 7 May 2022

THE 'BLUE' MOONIES OF MANCLAND v THE TOON *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

 Posted '8:42pm bells' Saturday 7th May 2022




"ONE POINT!--WE ANLY NEED ONE POINT!"

Tomorrow we off to The Etihad to face a Man City side that were devastated last week when they conceded 2 goals in stoppage time v Real Madrid in The Champions Leegue semi final, to take the game to extra time!---Where they conceded again to miss oot on the final! (They certainly got 'the blues'!)

Hopefully, they are still devastated and that NUFC can take advantage of this, especially az this iz the retorn of wor top goalscorer, Callum Wilson, who suffered a bad calf injury in late December---and hazzent played since! Kieran Trippier iznt far off a retorn eethaa, but iz unlikely to feature!

The away section iz sold oot again, with 3,000 Toon fans in The South Stand

Bornley's 3-1 defeat at home to Villaa this afternooon, meeeenz that NUFC anly need ONE point to guarantee survival!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Munday     

Friday, 6 May 2022

FLAG DAY AT THE HEEDBANGERS!

 Posted '1:11pm๐Ÿ”” bells Friday 6th May 2022



"NEIGHBOURS!---EVERYBODY NEEDS GOOD NEIGHBOURS!"

Gatesheed will lift the National Leegue North title at Gatesheed International Stadium tomorrow and 'Wor Flags' have kindly sent them some of the black n white flags used for wor flag displays to celebrate the occassion! (The Heedbangers play in black n white az well!)

This iz a great gesture to NUFCs near neighbours across the Tyne Bridge and we wish them well for tomorrow!

The Geordie Times woz plannin' to gan to the game--BUT!-we then foond oot that they were playin' H******D, the team aa love to hate and aa swore blind that aa would NEVER gan to see them play, az aa woz one of the unfortunate Toon fans who witnessed that terrible defeat 50 years ago in 1972 (The worst defeat av ever seen in 55 years of followin The Toon away!)

Despite the goodwill gesture, some fans (especially mackem lovers) divvint want this to happen! (They could aalways bring their red n white flags---couldn't they?)

Anyway!---we wish them well for next season in The National Leegue and hope its a great day for The Heedbangers!


Updated '6:16pm ๐Ÿ”” bells' The Heedbangers won 2-1 in front of a bumper 4,100 plus crowd!

๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ

Thursday, 5 May 2022

THE TOON RESORVES v THE SPARTANS OF BLYTH **** NORTHUMBERLAND SENIOR CUP FINAL*** TOOONEET!

 Posted just after 'high noon bells' Thorzday 5th May 2022



The final of The Northumberland Senior Cup takes place at SJP at '7:30 bells' tooneet between wor resorves and Blyth!

If yoo can get alang, heed for The East Stand where admission iz £7 for big kids and £3 for zimmerframeites!  Under 18s are admitted FREE! 

Not sure wot the crowd will be, but if youngins can get in for nowt we predict that at least 3,000 will be there!? (Includin quite a few from Blyth!)

In othaa news, wor final 3 games in The Premyaa Leegue are completely sold oot!   3,000 for wor away game on Sunday at The Etihad Stadium v Man C----52,300 for wor final home game v The Arse----and 2,350 for wor final away game of the season at Turf Moor v Bornley! 

Updated Friday:

Wor resorves lost 3-2 to Blyth and were 3-0 doon at HT

The Toon goals were scored by Turner-Cooke and Munoz in front of just 2,189 fans 

Wednesday, 4 May 2022

"BOURNEMOOOTH! BOURNEMOOOTH! HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

 Posted '1:01 pm bells' Wedinzday 4th May 2022

THE LAST TIME WE WERE AT BOURNEMOOOTH---MARCH 2019 (2-2 TOON IN BLUE) (NUFC WON 4-1 IN 2020, BUT THAT WOZ BEHIND CLOSED DOORS COZ OF COVID)

Followin Fulim'z promotion the othaa day, we must now make the langest Premyaa Leegue trip to Bournemoooth next season, az they won 1-0 v The Friar Tuck Mob (Forest) last neet to clinch 2nd spot!

It's a toss up which iz the forthest that we have travelled to a Premyaa Leegue away game, between Bournemoooth and Swanzee (Both aroond aboot a 700 mile roond trip!)

Of course we wont be gannin to Swanzee next season az they are still in The Championship! (Unless we draw them in one of the cups!?)

And after the fixture list this season, which had us gannin to Sooothampton on New Years Day (played later because of Covid), which woz wor langest jorney this season, yoo can bet your bottom dollar that we will be paired with Bournemoooth on New Years Day 2023! (The Premyaa Leegue hierarchy are sure to hoy a spanner in wor works!) 

Sommik tells me that come Joon, when the fixtures for next season are released, we will be heedin to the far south ower the Xmas and New Year period! (Could just az well be Brightin or Sooothampton again!)

Tuesday, 3 May 2022

"HOWAY THE HEEDBANGERS!"

 Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 3rd May 2022



Congratulations from 'The Geordie Times' to 'The Heedbangers of Gatesheed' for winnin promotion to The National Leegue from National Leegue North, when they drew 2-2 away to Chorley yesterday!   They are crowned champions after they opened up a 5 point gap on 2nd placed Brackley, with just one game to gan!

Aalso, congratulations to 'The Spartans of Blyth' for avoidin relegation from the same leegue az Gatesheed!

Monday, 2 May 2022

THE TOON LASSES 4 ALNWICK TOON LASSES 0 *** LASSES LEEGUE DIVISION 4

 Posted 'just after 'high noon bells' Munday 2nd May 2022



A CATCH 22(,000) SITUATION!

Yesterday afternooon The Toon LASSES played their forst ever game at SJP and wor crowd prediction woz between 4 and 5,000- how wrang we were az an amazin 22,134 torned up, NOT includin The Geordie Times, az we anly saw the last 15 minutes! 

,


Let me explain---aa woz in 'The Companions club' (aka Leazes End club) behind the East Stand at KO time and had a few gargels there!--It woz then onward to 'The Strawberry' ๐Ÿ“ but az aa passed The East Stand aa cud see that the exit gates were open--and so!---az yi dee-- aa sneaked in and sat in the corner of The Gallowgate End to see that there were at least 20,000 in attendance, with The East Stand and Gallowgate End completly full!  There were aalso fans in The lower Leazes End and guests in the very full directors box! (We just couldnt resist gannin in to have a look at lasses futbaall and the size of the crowd!) (The anly time we'd seen lasses futbaall before, woz on the telly!)



A'd hord that The Toon Lasses were winnin 4-0, but for the forst time ever aa didnt have a clue who woz playin for 'us'!

There were loads of families and the young kids loved it, az they waved the 'Wor Flags' in the air! (mostly young lasses)   There were nee more goals, but at least aa cud say that we'd seen history made!(for a qwaata of a  hour at least!)

Nee doubt that more lasses games will be at HQ in the future!

The official crowd of 22,134 woz the highest in the UK for  a lasses game this season!---And this woz  4th Division game az well!

"HOWAY THE LASSES!"

PS: This woz the forst time that 'The Geordie Times' had ever sneaked into SJP!

Do we feel guilty aboot gettin a 15 minute 'freebee' and not payin? 

Aye a little bit!๐Ÿ˜จ (We're anly part time Lass supporters!)




Sunday, 1 May 2022

THE TOON 0 THE LIVERBIRDS 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 1st May 2022

"GET THE FLAGS OOT FOR THE LADS!"

Wor fine run of unbeaten home Premyaa Leegue games finally came to an end  when title chasers Livaapoool came to Toon!

The main moment of the game came in the 19th minute when Fabian Schar clashed with former Toon player James Milner, with Schar lyin' injured on the pitch az the ref waved 'play on'?

"WE'VE GOT BIGGER FLAGS THAN YOO!---LIVAAPOOOL!----LIVAAPOOOL!"

This led to Jota crossin the baall at the Leazes End for Keita to slam home from 5 yards oot to give The Scousers the lead!



Many thought the game shud have been stopped, but the ref thought otherwise and this proved to be decisive az it woz the anly goal of the game!



NUFC had started off well and had chances az we attacked the Gallowgate goal in the forst half!  Gradually wor visitors took control and had several chances to double their lead, but we held oot and went in 1-0 doon at the break! (Almiron had the baall in the net in the 39th minute for NUFC, but it woz ruled offside!---And Saint Max fluffed a great chance az well!)

The 2nd half started off with 'The Liverbirds' controllin' things, az we foond it hard to even get oot of wor own half!



They tried in vain to score a 2nd goal, but again we held oot, but couldnt find the equaliser!----A 1-0 defeat against one of the best teams in Europe woz the out come, to lose for the forst time at home in 2022 (NOT includin the defeat by Cambridge in the FA Cup in January!)

NUFC dropped doon a place to 10th in the table, while Livaapoool went back to the top of the tree---for a few hours at least!


Attendance:52,281 (3,100 Liverbirds) (Highest attendance this season!)

Later on 'The Blue Moonies of Manchester' beat Leeedz 4-0 to reclaim top spot!----(Man City are The Toon's next opponents next Sunday, away!!!!!)

Friday, 29 April 2022

THE TOON v THE LIVERBIRDS **** TOMORROW DINNAATIME!

 Posted from '2:35pm bells' onwards,  Friday 29th April 2022


'Broken Nose Bruce' woz in charge for the forst 8 games, then Graeme Jones for 3 games!   'Steady Eddie' took the reins from game 12 v Brentfaad---(a game he couldn't attend coz he had Covid!)
And since then we have went from 19th and 6 points adrift with 6 points---to 9th with 43 points and 14 points clear of 3rd bottom place, in the space of 4 months!----REMARKABLE!

We gan into tomorrow's game 2nd anly to 'The Liverbird's in points earned in 2022 and with 4 wins in a row az well!

At SJP we have won 6 in a row and havvint been beaten at home in the Premyaa Leegue since before Xmas, and anly ONCE in 12 games, since Eddie took ower in November! (v Man City 0-4)---again, REMARKABLE!

It won't be eazy of course, az wor opponents are in brilliant form az well, az they attempt to overhaul 'The Blue Moonies of Manchester' to win the Premyaa Leegue!

Quite simply, Liverpoool and Man City are probably the best 2 teams in the world at the moment, so if NUFC can get even a draw tomorrow, it will be a great result!

We are now safe from the drop and can take the shackles off, while they MUST win to gan back to the top---for the moment at least!

A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear here on Sunday---so az per usual "Watch this space!"

Tuesday, 26 April 2022

TOP O THE LEEGUE!

 Posted 'high noon ๐Ÿ”” bells' Tuesday 26th April 2022




We don't like to brag!---BUT!--- this iz the form guide for the last 4 Premyaa Leegue games!

๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ‘


"WOW!"

And here iz somethin' that would be barely beleeevable just 3 months ago!



ARCHIVE GROUNDS MATCH REPORT LIST