Saturday 29 July 2017

326 opel arena mainz germany

Posted '6 50 bells'Jawman time 27th July 2017
Updated Sunday and Munday!

Ground number 326
Date of First Visit 29th July 2017
Opel Arena, Mainz, Germany

FSV Mainz 2
Newcastle United 1 (Gamez)

Attendance 6,470 (400 Toon fans)


A totally forgettable performance woz witnessed in the 30% heat and it woz more like a trainin session az the players sauntered aroond the pitch!

With hardly an effort on goal in the forst half we actually went behind after just 4 mins with a terrible defensive mix up!
It woz SO hot the players took a 'water break' after 25 minutes play!

We equalised in the  65th minute when Jesus scored!
(Jesus Gamez!) with a scrambled effort fron 1 yard oot! in front of the 400 Toon faithful present behind that goal!

However we couldnt hang on and a late winner from the home side sealed wor fate!
 Yet again we used 22 players!
Im in a bar near Mainz station writing this az we speeek!---- (6.30 bells)   Much more to follow later az I am in urgent need of some liquid refreshment!

Sunday update

The neet before we had been 'on the hoy" in Dusseldorf some 140 to the north of Mainz and had got the train from there the next mornin at '9 bells' which took 2 hour through the picturesque Rhine Valley where huge barges and pleasure cruisers past by on the river Rhine

It woz then an afternoon session in Mainz toon centre before heedin to some farmland on the ootskirts of Mainz where the 30,000 capacity brand new stadium woz located between fields of hay bails and crops of beetroot!

After watchin the match it woz then back to the toon centre to drown wor sorrows before catchin the train back to Dussedorf where wor hotel woz for somemore 'gargels' and finally 'beddy-byes'   "ZZZzzzz!!!"

It woz an orly 'get up' the next day to catch the mornin flight back to The Toon from Dusseldorf airport and I felt I'd been dragged backwards through a hedge 37 times after the previous days drinkin sessions!
Its 'aall go' when you're a Toon fan!!!


who put the lights oot?
"Chuckin oot time' in the orly hours of Sunday mornin!
BUT we DID manage to find anothaa bar open@


Posted midneet bells Saturday 28th July 2017


Friday 28 July 2017

325 turnbull ground, whitby (v celtic u23s)

Ground number 325
Date of First Visit: 27th July 2017
Turnbull Ground, Whitby

Celtic U23s 1
Newcastle United U23s 2 (Toney 2)

Whitby Town Challenge Cup

Attendance 820 (200 Toon fans, 300 Celtic fans)

                      Jamie watches on az Ivan Toney
                       back heels the baall into the goal

This woz 7 year old grandson Jamie's 2nd new groond in less than a week, followin on from wor U23s success at Gatesheed the previous Saturday and he woz excited to be gannin aall the way to Whitby (80 miles) for 'a lang distance game' az Gatesheed Stadium iz a mere 5 miles roond trip from hiz hoose!

On arrival ootside the groond after a 2 hour drive from Tyneside, we parked up in a street near the groond and heeded for the seafront to find a 'chippy' az Whitby iz THE place to eat fish n chips, bein' a huge fishin port

We wornt disappointed az the fish shop in Silver Street sold excellent cod and it woz 'washed doon' up the road in 'The Granby' with a pint of 'Smiths' for me and a 'coke beer' for Jamie!

It woz then 'onward' back to the groond where the clubhoose woz packed with mainly Celtic fans and a few Toon

Jamie woz wearin a Toon top and a club official approached him and asked if he would like to be one of the mascots that came oot with the teams!
yoo can guess just wot hiz answer woz and he woz 'whisked away' towards the dressin rooms to meet the players!
(The 2nd time that he haz been a Toon mascot followin on from last season when he woz a mascot in wor home game against Burton Albion)
How lucky can yoo get!

Out he came from the players tunnel with wor number 4 Jack Hunter alang with 8 othaa mascots from both teams

We started off well and attacked the left hand goal from us   There woz a gadgie watchin the match from hiz bedroom window in a hoose behind the goal

Howevet, despite bein on top Celtic took the lead late on in the half

Jamie had predicted we would win 2-1 and he woz proved right az near the hour mark Ivan Toney back heeled the baall into the Celtic net to equalise
Before we had time to draw breath he scored again from a Roberts centre to win the game and put us into Saturdays final where we will play eethaa Whitby or AZ  Alkmaar of Holland
Unfortunatly I wont be there az I am off to Jawmany to watch the 1st team play Mainz at the same time az the final!

Toon fan Alex of St George had told Jamie that wolves prowelled the moor above Whitby at night and to make sure hiz window woz closed or they might 'get him'!
He did!

More pix to follow!

Update munday 31st July


A superb hat trick from Ivan Toney clinched the Whitby Challenge Cup final against AZ Almaar of Holland!
Just a pity we couldnt witness it az we wete in Jawmany watchin the  1st team at the same time!

Wednesday 26 July 2017


Posted 11 30 pm bells Wednesday 26th July 2017
Updated 'high noon bells' Thorsday

The Toon won this pre season friendly with fower (4) 2nd half goals
Dwight Gayle opened the scorin with a tap in and there were forthaa goals from Jacob Murphy (2) and Mitro

The goal sequences were az follows:
50th minute: Atsu centres for an easy tap in from Gayle
51st minute: Murphy side steps keeper to slide the baall home (see top pic)
76th minute: An arrons cross finds Mitrovic unmarked and he haz the easy task of side footin the baall into an empty net
79th minute: Murphy's 2nd goal---a great volley

7,601 were present inc 2,404 Toon fans
again 22 players were used by us

Tooneet we heed for the delight of the fishin' port of Whitby where wor U23s are takin on Glasgay Celtic's U23s in a 4 team tournament---this iz a NEW GROOND!!!!

Match report on this tomorrow!
PS wor U17s won 2-0 against The Kamakazi Kids of Japan in the Northern Ireland Tournament lat neet az well!--Its aall go---isnt it just!


Posted 'high noon bells' Wednesday 26th July 2017

Wor U23s drew 0-0 last neet at 'The Whitley Bay Watchers' usin' an entierly different outfield to those who played at Gatesheed last Saturday (goalie Nathan Harker woz the anly exeption!) in front of a 861 crowd
In complete cotrast wor U17s annialated Beijing Mornig Star 9-0 in the Northern Ireland Tournament!--a hat trick apiece for Wilson and Robson plus goals from Longstaff, Aplin and Kasinga completed the rout in a totally one sided game!

Tooneet they play Kamakazi Uni from Japan (aka Komazawi Uni) while wor 22 man forst team squad heed for the delightss of a rain sodden Braadfaad

Match reports on both tomorrow!

Tuesday 25 July 2017


Posted '1:00 pm bells' Tuesday 25th July 2017

The games are certainly comin' up thick and fast and there are quite a few this week!
Tooneet we travel to The Whitley Bay Watches where wor U23s are takin' on 'Bay' at 7 bells'

Then tomorrow evenin' wor forst team travel to Valley Parade to take on Braadfaad City at '7:30 bells'
Thorsday sees the U23s in action again in a 4 team tournament in Whitby (7:45 bells) when we will play Glasgay Celtic U23s
Saturday sees the forst team in action again ---this time in Jawmany, where we face FSW Mainz at 4 bells

In between aall this wor U16s are playin' in a tournament in Northern Ireland---so whever yoo live yoo have a chance to see at least one of wor teams in action!

Match reports to follow!---az per usual watch this space!

Monday 24 July 2017


Posted '1:05 pm bells munday 24th July 2017

I hope u arnt shocked but I decided to gan and watch U23s at Gatesheed on Saturday instead of gannin to Preston to watch a Toon XX11 (Toon 22)

Really, these pre season games meen that 40 odd players will be used at some point durin matches and are now farcical trainin sessions

700 were present at The International Stadium with a 50/50 split between Toon and Heedbangers fans!

Aa went with grandson Jamie and hiz mam and dad in wot woz a very wet afternoon

El Mhanni opened the scorin' for us with a fine strike in the  11th minute
Fernandez then added a 2nd before the break to put us 2-0 up with a fantastic shot from 30 yards oot!
IT woz the point that the 'supersubs' started comin' on

The 2nd half woz a bit borin' and the 'highlight' of the 1st period woz interupted by a flock of huge seagulls who flew in and oot of the main stand----one even settled on an exit barrier to watch the match! (see top photo!) and woz rewarded az he/she witnessed wor thord and final goal, scored by Dan Ward on the hour mark with a shot that went underneath The Heed's keeper!
Many more supersuubs started appearin' for both sides and aa estimated that we had used 22 payers to Gatesheed's 20-----Just like the forst team!---EH!

This woz 7 year old Jamie's forst ever away game---if yoo can caall a 5 mile roond trip to hiz hoose and back an 'away' game!

Sunday 23 July 2017


Posted '10:00am bells' Sunday 23rd July 2017


The most memorable thing aboot this trip to Preston woz the news that a Toon fan had jumped off a pub roof and broke hiz ankles!---but after a trip to the local RVI he insisted on gannin to the match in a wheelchair! (PS: Its quite normal for some Toon fans to do these things!)
Mitro opened the scorin' on 8 minutes but that woz the most memorable thing aboot the match az the home side equalised before the break
3,000 Toon fans were in the stands (plus 1 wheelchair at the front!) in the 7,000 plus crowd

In the 2nd half a host of subs came on and aall told 22 players were used by Rafa!
These pre season games are turnin into a farce az Preston aalso used loads of subs.
They are only now glorified trainin' sessions in wor opinion!

Toon team: It will take aall day to type their names oot amd aa havvent got time at the mo!

Updated '11 30 bells'

Toon team:(Deeep breath!) Elliot, Mbemba, Hanley, Lejeune, Dummett, Diame, Shelvey, Atsu, De Jong, Aarons, Mitrovic  Subs: Darlow, Yedlin, Clark, Colback, Hayden, Murphy, Perez, Gayle, Robers, Woodman, Manquillo

Attendance: 7,380

U23s match report will appear here later (much later!)

PPS: The Toon fan who broke hiz ankles woz that p*ssed he couldnt remember the score at the half time break! **** 1   1 **** hiz left ankle and hiz right ankle!

Friday 21 July 2017

At last! Roads closed on matchdays!

Posted 'high noon bells' Friday 21st July 2017

The City cooncil haz at last seen sense and aall roads aroond SJP will be shut 20 mins before and after each home game for safety reasons----and not before time!  There have been many occasions when leavin the groond where there are near misses az the 50,000 plus crowds pile oot onto the streets

In the past they have shut the streets for rugby, Olympic games, cycle races, etc---but futbaall fans have had to risk their lives crossin Strawberry Place and Barrack Road in particular!

In  othaa news- the forst team squad heed for Preston tomorrow while the U23s heed for 'The Heed' in pre season friendlies tomorrow afternooon

A full Geordie Times match report for both games will appear here sometime on Sunday
az per usual watch this space!

Thursday 20 July 2017

MARX MINI MAGS quiz answer

Posted '11:00am bells' Sunday 16th July 2017
Updated thorsday

A Toon fan caalled Mark 'The Suit' collects miniature models of Toon players old and new and haz sent us some of hiz collection.
We have given him hiz own page (MARX MINI MAGS) and yoo must guess who the 'mini Mag' iz
Answer later on this week
"WHO AM I?"  "I am Alan Shearer!"

Wednesday 19 July 2017


Posted 'high noon bells Wednesday 19th July 2017

Murphy (top) & Manqillo

Thankfully 2 more signings have been reported to boost wor squad. Jacob Murphy haz signed for a reported fee of 10.5 million---he iz a winger and haz signed from Norwich and iz 27 years old
Aalso signed iz a right back by the name of Javier Manquillo for 4.5 million---he has signed from Atletico Madrid and iz a 23 year old Spaniard

Hopefully more signings will happen before the season starts and we have to tell yoo that we are relieved that Rafa looks certain to stay after the rumours of an imminent departure due to lack of progress in the transfor market

Az per usual we will keep yoo posted a day later than the rest!
(This IZ The Geordie Times after aall!)