Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Thorzday 15th Octobaa 2026
Grovelling apologeeez for the late posting of this match report from last Saturday— 5 days late!—But this iz The Geordie Times!—Wot did yoo expect? ⬇️
Ground number 80 with Dunston (or iz it 81?)
“THERE’S A GHOST IN THE HOUSE!”
(THE PUBLIC HOUSE CAR PARK, THAT IZ!”)
“ I LOVE THE SOUND OF BREAKING GLASS!”
With The Toon not playin at Coventry til Munday neet, we needed wor Saturday ‘fix’. So we travelled doon to east Yorkshire on the Dunston team bus (committee at front, team at back and fans in the middle!) for this leegue game in the village of North Ferriby, near Hull, on the banks of the Humber and within sight of the huge Humber bridge! (Been here many 🌙 moons before to watch NUFC U21s play Hull U21s)
Some fans on the bus had withdrawal symptoms (includin ‘me’!) and got dropped off at The Duke of Cumberland (the anly boozer in the village) aboot half a mile from the groond, for the pre match ‘gargels’— and at nearly £23 for 4 pints, it wozzint a cheap roond eethaa! ie: With anly one boozer in the village, they’ve got a captive audience and can charge wot they like! 💰 4 Dunston diehards had travelled doon on the train and were there aalready, on the ‘hoy’!🍺🍺🍺🍺
THE DUKE OF CUMBERLAND IN EAST YORKSHIRE? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE!🤔
It woz soon time heed for the groond and az we left, a white car started drivin oot the pub’s car park, which woz on a hill.
Instead of heedin for the exit the car went straight forward and crunched loudly into anothaa white car parked at the bottom, with a glass headlight and tail lights shattering on impact!
We looked and could see there woz neebody in the car? (One of those driverless models, perhaps!?) And then it dawned on us—the driver had forgotten to put the handbrake on and the car simply rolled doon the hill into the other car!— Both were brand new cars az well! (“Ouch!”)
Anyway!—We got to the groond with 5 minutes to spare from the ‘3:00 🔔s kick off and heeded for a narrow covered stand on the far side of the pitch!
SPOT THE BRIDGE?
It woz one way traffic from the start (driverless cars excepted!) az Dunston Bad Blue Boys, in their aall red change strip, attacked ‘ The Apple 🍎 Tree End’ (aye there were apple trees behind that goal)(North Ferriby were in their white and green strip)
It woz anly a matter of time til the Ferriby defence woz breached, with the visitors havin several chances to take the lead—and sure enough it happened in the 34th minute, from an excellent move!—A ‘Village People’ defender lost possession and the baall foond Dunston’s number 10 Robinson— He threaded the baall to number 9 Kneeshaw, who raced into the box to plant an accurate shot into the far corner of the goal! 1-0 to Dunston!
THE BAD BLUE BOYS IN AALL RED!
Thats the way the forst half ended az we made a mad dash to the clubhoose on the other side of the pitch!
WONDER WHICH TEAM HE SUPPORTS?🤔
Again, the visitors from Tyneside dominated the orly possession az they attacked ( you guessed it!)‘The Humber Bridge End’ and sure enough their second goal came in the 55th minute when a Dunston player woz fouled in the box by a Ferriby defender!
Up stepped Will Shaw to fire the baall to the right of their goalie, to double their lead with loud cheering 📣 and applause 👏 from the Dunston faithful (Aboot 25 fans and committee)
Attendance: 349
After the match it woz back to the clubhoose for the celebratory ‘gargels’, before heedin back to Tyneside via the M62 and A1M
The result lifts Dunston up to third place in the table, while North Ferriby drop to 15th position!
Can you spot the dillibrit mystaykx on this sign near the clubhoose? (And NO, we didn’t wear Covid masks on the jorney doon to Humberside and back!)⬇️
GHOST 'GROOND' FOOTNOTE: 👻
Mee mate ‘Davy the Silver Fox’ reckons I went with him to South Bank near Middlesbrough in the 1990s to watch Dunston!—I can honestly say I can’t remember bein there? Hence the top of the page groond count with Dunston iz 80 or 81?)🤔
“WE WOZ THERE!”⬇️THE PROOF!”
