Tuesday 31 January 2023

THE TOON V SOOOTHAMPTON *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI FINAL 2nd LEG *** TOOONEEET!

 Posted 'high noon🔔 bells' Tuezday 31st January 2023



Tooneet at SJP we play wor biggest game for 23 years in wor quest to get to Wembley in The Leegue Cup final! ('8:00 bells' kick off----live on SKY)

NUFC have a 1-0 advantage from the forst leg last Tuezday and we can anly hope that we dont baalls it up!

We are odds on to reach the final, az are Moan U who play Forest tomorrow with a 3 goals advantage in their semi!

It will be a norvy 90 minutes (or 120 if extra time iz needed!---plus pens!)

This iz where we want to be----challengin' for trophies once again!

Lets aall cheer 'The Toon' on to victory and dream of Wembley on February 26th!

"HOWAY THE LADS!"


A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear here sometime tomorrow----lets hope (and pray!) that its a great report!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

Monday 30 January 2023

HE'S AZ QUICK AZ A FLASH!"

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 30th January 2023

Updated Tuezday '11:45am bells'



It's now official!  Az soon az yoo see a player in front of The East Stand sign in a Toon top, twirlin' a black n white scarf above hiz heed, yoo know its a 'done deal'!



In this case a £45 million 'done deal' makin wor new 21 year old winger Anthony 'Flash' Gordon the 2nd highest transfer fee in wor history! (Isak iz the most ever at £60 million quid!)




"WELCOME TO TYNESIDE ANTHONY!"

Updated Tuezday '11:45am bells'

Right back Harrison Ashby haz aalso signed from West 'am for a reported £3 million quid!
"Welcome to Tyneside Harrison!"


Saturday 28 January 2023

EVAATONIANS HAVE ANLY GOT THEMSELVES TO BLAME!

 Posted '2:19pm🔔 bells' Saturday 28th January 2023

Updated Sunday '11:42am bells'

GRAINY PIC OF ANTHONY GORDON AT THE NUFC TRAINNIN' GROOND THIS MORNIN'!

"GET OUT OF OUR CLUB!"----"HE HAZ--HE HAZ!!!"

News that 21 year old winger Anthony Gordon iz on Tyneside az we speak to sign for us iz deein the rounds!--A fee of aroond aboot £40 million with £5 million add ons haz been mentioned!

The Evaatin boyhood fan haz been hounded out of hiz club by toxic fans seen chasin hiz car doon one of the narrow streets that surroond Goodison Park, with fans blockin' hiz and othaa players exit after their loss to Sooothampton last week with traffic bollards! (In Livaapoool's colours az well!)

The video which iz deein the rounds on twitter etc shows fans shoutin "Get out of our club!" and singin the "Your not fit to wear the shirt!" song!

Gordon hazzint been playin well lately and who can blame him, when at the back of hiz mind he knows that it will be toxic after a game, shud Evaatin lose!---It certainly doesn't help!---does it?

Directors have been attacked with one woman director bein put in a heedlock by a 'fan'?---and told to stay away--or else face the consequences! (They DID stay away!) 

Divvint get me wrang, but we naa a few Evaatin fans who we meet in 'The Barlow Arms' near the groond, before and after games doon there--and they are canny people, who wouldn't dream of deein such things!

They are NOT aall toxic by any meeenz!

Other news that Kieran Trippier haz signed an extention to hiz contract til 2025 iz more good news aheed of wor biggest game for 23 years (The last time we were in a domestic cup semi final) on Tuesday against Sooothampton, for a place at the new Wembley in The Leegue Cup final on February 26th!

Aall we can say iz:---"Welcome to Tyneside Anthony!"---And we promise that we won't put any road block barricades up on Barrack Road (The main road ootside SJP) to stop yoo from leavin' after a game---win, draw or lose! 

MORE SIGHTINGS OF 'FLASH ⚡ GORDON'!




METRO CENTRE, GATESHEEED

Thursday 26 January 2023

THE SKY'S THE LIMIT!-----NEXT EIGHT GAMES LIVE ON THE TELLY!

 Posted '1:30p bells' Thorzday 26th January 2023



NUFC's popularity iz good news for armchair 'can' fans and pub plonnkies, az wor next 8 (EIGHT!) games are live on eethaa SKY or BT!---But not such good news for The Toon Travellers who actually gan to the games!

6 (SIX!) on SKY and 2 on BT!----The dates and times are!---

JANUARY

Tue 31st  The Simon Templar Mob of Sooothampton Home (LC) '8:00 bells' SKY

FEBRUARY

Sat 4th  The Jellied Eels Mob of West 'am Home '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 11th Bournemoooth Away '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 18th The Liverbirds Home '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 25th Nee Where Near Brightin Home '12:30 bells' BT (Will be caalled off if we reach the Leegue Cup final at Wembley on Sun 26th Feb)

MARCH

Sat 4th The Blue Moonies of Man Siteee Away '12:30 bells' BT

Sun 12th Wolverhampton Wanabeez Home '4:30 bells' SKY

Fri 17th The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham Away 8:00 bells SKY




Wednesday 25 January 2023

THE SIMON TEMPLAR MOB OF SOOOTHAMPTON 0 THE TOON 1 *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI-FINAL 1st LEG

 Posted 'on the trains back yem from '9:44am bells onwards, Wedinzday 25th January 2023

TOON FANS AND PLAYERS CELEBRATE WOR VICTORY!

"WEMBLEY ON THE HORIZON!"


*A great day for aall NUFC fans at St. Mary's and anothaa record broken az this woz the forst time we have won an away semi final leg of any competition!  (Wor 2 previous semi final away legs ended in a 1-0 defeat to Sporz in the 1976 Leegue Cup semi final and a 0-0 draw v Rangers in the Fairs Cup in 1969--both games attended by little old me!)

TOON IN DARK BLUE AND YELLOW   VIEW FROM ROW 'L'

It wasnt a good game by any meeenz, with wayward off target shots by Willock, Longstaff and Joelinton in particular!



Joelinton made up for hiz errors when super sub Isak ran doon the wing and crossed the baall for Joe to fire into the net from close range in the 73rd minute to send the 3,200 Toon fans behind that goal into celebratory mode! 


VIEW OF BLONDIE'S HEED FROM ROW 'L'!

2 disallowed goals for both sides for hand baalls and a Sooothampton dismissal late on meant that we played oot the last few minutes against 10 men!



The result meeenz that Sooothampton must win at SJP next Tuesday to progress to the final!

It's aall in wor hands now for a trip to Wembley late next month!  




Attendance: 30,090 (3,200 very happy Toon fans!)

2,000 below capacity!


Anothaa 'celebration' had happened  before the game when we visited wor 100th different boozer this season for away trips! And to dee it before the end of January az well!   But just how many can we dee with the season just beyond the halfway point?🤔






Runnin total 101
Plus boozers we had previously been tee when we played Sooothampton in the Premyaa Leegue last November! 
                      ⬇️


THE (BREW)HOUSE OF HORRORS!🥶


Tuesday 24 January 2023

SOOOTHAMPTON v THE TOON **** LEEGUE CUP SEMI-FINAL 1st LEG

 Posted '9:20am bells' Tuezday 24th January 2023



Havin' just got back from wor game at Cristill Palliss on Sunday afternooon, we are off on wor travels once again to Sooothampton via King's Cross for wor Leegue Cup semi final tie 1st leg!

In between that aa did mee normal truck run from the Team Valley in Gatesheed to Redditch in deepest Worcestershire---a roond trip of 444miles, finishin' at 4:00am bells this mornin---catchin 2 hours sleep "ZZZzzzz!" and then draggin mee lifeless body oot of mee pit at '7:00bells to catch the 8:58 bells' train back to London!  

Match and booze report will be posted on train on the way back on Wedinzday!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"  

Sunday 22 January 2023

THE PALLISS 0 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2022-2023

 Posted on train on the way back from 

London from '10:00am 🔔 bells' onwards

Sunday 22nd January 2023



The crap view from row 29! (Toon in white and green)


(Brief match report)

"NEWCASIL UNITED WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED!"

Numerous chances from Joelinton, Almiron, Wilson, Isak etc to win this game ended in weak shots and heeders which failed to beat the Palliss keeper, with Nick Pope havin to make just one great save in the 2nd half to deny the home side!



The draw lifted us back into 3rd place in the table and woz wor 15th Premyaa Leegue game in a row undefeated to set a new club record!



It's a game that we will forget within days and if anything, we need somebody to put the baall into the net! 

Nee doubt Steady Eddie will be hunting for one in the window--not lang left before it closes though!







Attendance: 25,350 (2,700 Toon)


Pub crawl report

We visited several boozers, some for the forst time (7), bringin wor total for the season to 97 different boozers! (Includin wor grand tour of Austria where we visited 38 different drinkin dens and NOT 41 az originally posted!) 











⬇️






More 'unusual' photos!








PS; One photo aa didn't manage to get coz aa wasnt quick enough to get mee camera phone workin', woz at King's Cross station, when a lad aboot 20 years old walked in with a single bed mattress tied to hiz back!
HONEST a'm NOT jokin'


Friday 20 January 2023

THE PALLISS v THE TOON *** TOMORROW EVENIN'

 Posted not lang after 'high noon bells' Friday 20th January 2023

AALL 2,700 AWAY TICKETS ALLOCATED, SOLD OOT STRAIGHT AWAY!

"WOOD HEEDS FOR THE FOREST!"

News that striker Chris Wood iz off to Forest reaches us----'Steady Eddie' told him that hiz game time at The Toon would be limited with both Isak and Wilson fit again---and that he'd be better off gannin to Forest, despite hiz reluctency to leave us!

Chris did a great job last season in helpin us to stay up, with vital goals at the reet time!---He woz aalways a 'stop gap' signin' and we aall wish him well in hiz new venture!--He wont be forgotten!  "Cheers Chris!"

The results ower the last 2 days have certainly gone wor way, az Moan U conceded a last gasp goal at The Palliss on Wedinzday to deny them 3 points in the 1-1 draw---and move just one point above us (instead of 3!) ----and then last neet at Man City, Sporz hoyed away a 2 goal lead at half time to lose 4-2 in dramatic fashion to keep them 5 points behind us in 5th place, with a game more played!

This iz a great opportunity to open up an 8 point gap on them and owertake Moan U to move back into 3rd position in The Premyaa Leegue table!----It won't be easy of course (Az Moan U foond oot!), but the way we are playin', its quite possible to take the 3 precious points in wor quest for Champions Leegue futbaall next season!

'The Geordie Times' will of course bring yoo a full match (and booze!) report az we travel back from London on the train on Sunday mornin'   Az per usual  "Watch This space!" 

Thursday 19 January 2023

NUFC BACK IN TOP 20 RICH LIST!

 Posted '1:33pm bells' Thorzday 19th January 2023



The latest Deloitte Futbaall rich list haz been annoonced for 2023 and NUFC are back in the top 20 after a 4 year absence!

"ONWARD AND UPWARD!"

Tuesday 17 January 2023

SOOOTHAMPTON HOME AND AWAY TICKETS NOW ON SALE!

 Posted '1:45pm bells' Tuezday 17th January 2023



Tickets are now on sale for wor 2 legged Leegue Cup semi final v Sooothampton, and fans can buy their OWN SEAT wherever they sit for home games!

For the away game we have been allocated just 3,200 tickets!---The same number that we got for wor 4-1 Premyaa Leegue win there, orlier this season!




Meeenwhile wor FA Youth Cup tie v The Arse U18s tooneet ('7:00bells') haz been moved from Whitley Park to SJP!   Prices £3 for big kids and just £1 for sprogs and zimmerframeites! (East Stand only) (Season tickets are NOT valid for this game!)

Updated Wedinzday 'high noon bells'

NUFC U18s lost 3-2 last neet at SJP in front of a 983 'crowd'

We came from behind twice with the score sequences az follows:

15th minute: 0-1 Ferdinand open the scorin at The Gallowgate End with a scrambled goal

19th minute: 1-1  Lewis Miley equalises after burstin through the box to fire home at The Leazes End

44th minute: 1-2 Cozier-Duberry regains the lead for wor visitors with a fine shot

57th minute: 2-2 Wor 2nd equaliser through Ben Parkinson from 6 yards oot at The Gallowgate End

87th minute: 2-3 Kamara seals the victory for The Arse from a few yards oot to break wor hearts!

Footnote: Aa went to infant skoool with 16 year old Lewis Miley's granddad when aa woz 5 years old and would have loved to have seen hiz face when Lewis scored wor forst goal! 

"HE'S ONE OF OUR OWN!"

Monday 16 January 2023

THE TOON 1 FULIM 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2022-2023

 Posted '12:52pm bells' Munday 16th January 2023

THE SIGN UNDER THE EDDIE HOWE BANNER SAYS:
"WE'RE NOT HERE TO BE POPULAR, WE'RE HERE TO COMPETE!"

This woz a tough game against a very resiliant Fulim side who looked much better than the team we beat 4-1 at their place orlier this season!

VIEW FROM ROW 'B' MILBURN STAND BALCONY

Fulim came here on the back of an historic win against arch rivals Chelsea on Thorzday neet---historic coz this woz anly the 2nd time they had beat their 'big bruvver' in 35 years!

THE TOON ATTACK THE LEAZES GOAL (1st HALF)

And so it proved az we slogged away for the forst goal!---It never came in the forst half, but the 2nd half woz different!

While the Toon were on the attack at The Gallowgate End the big screen lit up to say that there woz a possible penalty at The Leazes End for Fulim!



After the ref looked at the monitor on the East Stand side, he pointed to the spot az Trippier woz adjudged to have fouled Codova-Reid in the box in the 67th minute!

After lang arguments up stepped former Toon striker Mitrovic aand he fired home past Pope in The Toon goal to put them one up, to loud cheers from the travillin 1,700 faithful who had made the trip from west London!----

But wait a minute!---the old guy who sits beside me at the match said he thought Mitrovic had inadvertently struck the baall with both feet!----After a quick check by the ref the goal woz disallowed to very large cheers from the home faithful!----We'd got out of jail!

2nd HALF ACTION AT THE GALLOWGATE END

And then in the very late minute of the game we won it when super sub Isak heeded in from half a yard oot!----a goal that your great granny could have scored! Sean Longstaff crossed the baall and Wilson helped it on to Isak---and the rest iz history!

We never gave up and this woz just reward az we were the better team on the day!  Another valuable 3 points meant we gan back above Moan U on goal difference and just one point behind 2nd placed Man City!

The Arse beat Sporz 2-0 which meenz that they are now 9 points clear of us at 'the top of the tree' and look odds on to win The Premyaa Leegue now!  Sporz defeat meenz that the gap between them and us iz now 5 points and a Champions Leegue place looks better by the day for us, az we reach the halfway point of the season!




Attendance: 52, 247 (1,722 Fulim)

*

IF YOO INCLUDE THE LEEGUE CUP GAMES, NUFC HAVE WON 14 TIMES THIS SEASON, COMPARED TO ONCE AT THIS STAGE LAST SEASON!----"SOME TURNAROOND---"EH!

YET AGAIN HAPPY TOON FANS LEAVE SJP


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