Wednesday 27 December 2023

THE TOON 1 THE FRIAR TUCK MOB OF NOTTINGHAM 3 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2023-2024

 Posted '1:57pm bells' Wedinzday 27th Decembaa 2023

"ARE YOU CHRIS WOOD IN DISGUISE?"

"THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PAST!"

Last Christmas on Boxin' Day Chris Wood scored a penalty for NUFC in wor 3-0 win at Lestaa City!

We then sold him to Forest in the January transfor window coz he wasnt deemed good enough!

Fast forward exactly one year and he scores a hat-trick against us at SJP to stun the crowd (even the Forest fans!) in a revenge 'attack'! (excuse the pun!)

Yih just couldnt make this up--could yih?

It started off so well az well!---A convorted penalty from Isak at The Gallowgate End after he woz hacked doon in the box by Aina in the 20th minute gave us the lead!



And then just before the half time interval Miggy Almiron woz clean through and looked certain to score, BUT inexplicably tried to pass the baall into the middle BUT it woz intercepted by a Forest player and the baall woz hoofed forward and with Chris Wood unmarked in the box he had a simple tap in to level the scores and stun the 52,000 plus crowd!



It certainly knocked the Christmas stuffing (sic!) oot of NUFC az the 2nd half woz a disaster waitin' to unfold!---And it DID!

Wood scorin twice more az he rampaged through wor defence to claim the most unlikely hat-trick EVER!

He'd come back to haunt us for certain, az the empty seats near the end told its own story!



Miggy Almiron had a nightmare and inexplicably he tried to put the baall into hiz OWN net at The Gallowgate End, but a Forest attacker got in the way of hiz shot and luckily for him it deflected to safety!--

(Did he still 'Fink' that we were kickin that way in the 2nd half az well???)



Attendance: 52,207 (Oh no there wernt!----4 empty seats next to me by 'NO SHOW' season ticket holders!) (3,100 Friar Tucks!)


*Fans cannit get tickets, yet those season ticket holders who divvint turn up, cannit be bothered to pass them on to those desperate to get in!

Tuesday 26 December 2023

THE TOON v THE FRIAR TUCK MOB *** DINNAATIME!

 Posted '8:00am bells' Boxing Day 2023

"I'M DEAD EXCITED ROBIN!---I'VE GOT A TICKET FOR 'THE AWAY END' ON BOXING DAY!" (From left to right: Maid Marion, Robin Hood, Friar Tuck)

We come off a very disappointin defeat at Lootin on Saturday, hopin to pick worsels up for this clash with The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham at SJP!

If we win then it will be wor 8th successive home win in The Premyaa Leegue, which iz in total contrast to wor away form of 4 successive Premyaa Leegue defeats on the road!

NUFC currently sit in 7th place in the table

Forest meeenwhile have lost 5 of their last 6 Premyaa Leegue games and are just ootside the drop zone!

Its a ridiculous '12:30 bells' kick off, with some boozers near the groond openin' at '9:00am bells', like The Strawberry and Leazes End Companions Club!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Tuezday!---Az per usual---"Watch this space!"

Monday 25 December 2023

*********THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS*********






ON THE 12th DAY OF CHRIST-MAS!
JOE HARVEY ^ SAID TO MEEE!
TWELVE! ^ ALAN FOGGON!

ELEVEN! ^ JACKIE SINCLAIR!


TEN! ^ JIMMY SCOTT!





NINE! ^ WYN 'THE LEAP'!







EIGHT! ^ POP ROBSON!



SEVEN! ^ KEITH DYSON!


SIX! ^ BOBBY MONCUR!


FIVE! ^ Mc-NAAA-MEEE!


FOUR!  ^ TOMMY GIBB!


THREE! ^ FRANKY CLARK!


TWO! ^ DAVY CRAIG!


AND!  Mc-FAUL ^ IS OUR GOAL-EEE!


*'Smokin' Joe Harvey was captain of the NUFC team which won the
FA Cup in 1951 and 1952.
He then went on to become manager in the 1960's and won
the Inter Cities Fairs Cup in 1969.
Aall the players mentioned played some part in that campaign







Sunday 24 December 2023

THE MAD HATTERS 1 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2023-2024

 Posted '1:00pm bells' Xmas Eve 2023

"A VIEW TO DIE FOR!"

"KING'S CROSS CHRISTMAS CURSE!"

For the thord time in 11 days we travelled through King's Cross station in London to reach wor destination!

Sporz on Decembaa 12th where we were hammered 4-1

Chelseee last week where we agonisingly lost on penalties in The Leegue Cup!

And then yesterday when we humiliatingly lost 1-0 to Loootin at their dump of a futbaall groond!---Happy Xmas! 



The entrance to Kenilworth Road iz an experience in itself, az the tornstiles are through an ancient terraced hoose and yoo waak in underneath a bedroom through wot would have been its livin room and into the back yard before the groond woz there!

"SING IN THE LIVIN' ROOM!"

Then up a staircase to the back of the stand where yoo get a great view of the washin' on some old wifeys clothes lines in the back gardens, where aa spotted some pink knickers and old wifeys bloomer blowin in the wind amongst other items of clothing!

"SO THIS IZ WOT YOO CAALL 'SPORTS WASHING!"


In the stand it woz a case of 'try and find a seat with nee posts to obstruct your view', which proved impossible to dee az there were so many roof posts and a floodlight pylon to block your view! (Nee seat numbers and nee resorved seats this time!)

Anyway! enough of this dilapidated relic which haz hardly changed since we were last here some 30 years ago! (Mee first visit here woz actually way back in 1975- the groond iz in a time warp!)

If I remember correctleee??? Miggy had a great chance to open the scorin at the far end from us (Obstucted view of course!) Az did Callum Wilson, but it wasn’t to be!

Spot the floodlight pylon and the square hole cut into the roof to let it ‘sneak through’!                     BUT! if it rains though, yih gannih get very wet if your seat's there!"

Then it woz aall Lootin az they pressed for the opener!

This came (inevitably!) through an Andros Townsend heeder in the 25th minute (a former Toon player of course!) to put The Mad Hatters 1-0 up!

They pressed for a second goal and it nearly came soon after when Martin Dubravka's crossbar woz rattled with a great shot!--Luckily for us it bounced doon and the Toon goalie grabbed it before anymore damage could be done!

Another post in front of the left hand goal post to block wor view!

NUFC were out of sorts on wor travels again and aa couldnt help Finkin that King's Cross woz some kind of curse on us!?

WE manage to find the net through Isak late in the 2nd half but hiz goal woz ruled oot az hiz left hand woz fractionally offside!???

ISAK IN DARK BLUE AND YELLOW

Lootin had hit the bar at the other end again and we were lucky to lose by just the one goal margin!



Attendance: 11,042 (1,100 devastated  Toon fans!)


It woz then the train back to St Pancras station where a few customary 'drownin of the sorrows' gargels were had at nearby Betjamin Arms (the 3rd time we had done this here in less than a fortneet!) before catchin' the '8:00bells' train back yem from (wait for it!) KING'S CROSS!😧


Not much of a pub crawl this time! 3 inc Bethune Arms




Just The Barrel Vaults at KX and The Bricklayers boozer in Lootin (and of course The Betjamen Arms!)

PS: Mad Hatters an explanation

Lootin’s nickname iz The Hatters!

Saturday 23 December 2023

THE MAD HATTERS v THE TOON *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

 Posted '6:00 am bells' Saturday 23rd Decembaa 2024


Somewhere in a hoose above the away end! (below!)

it’s mad-hatters tea party time!  it’s no ‘oak!

*In aboot an hours time we are on a train to King's Cross (again) and then onwards to Loootin! 

it’s a very lang time since we last visited this groond, which the away fans must enter through somebody’s doon stairs passage!

It’s a dump for certain az iz the toon centre BUT it won’t be an easy place to get a result!

After visiting The San Siro Milan, Dortmund and PSG, this place will send yoo crashing back doon to Earth in complete contrast!

Honestly Gatesheed Stadium iz 10 times better (and bigger!) az Kenilworth Road iz more like Whitley Bay’s groond or Blyth Spartan’s in comparison!

The fact that they have went from non Leegue to The Premyaa Leegue in a few short years iz a fackin miracle!

Anyway! we really must get sommik oot of the game az defeat iz unFinkable!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Xmas Eve!  Let’s hope it iz indeed a happy Xmas!? 🎄 


*

Friday 22 December 2023

DOON MEMORY LANE *** QPR 1968

Posted '2:30pm bells' Friday 22nd Decembaa 2023


This week 55 years ago we travelled to west London where we took on QPR at Loftus Road in an old Division 1 game!

A Geordie Times archive match report from that game is printed below (Ground number 006) 

006 rangers stadium (loftus road) qpr



(GROUND NUMBER 6)

Date of First Visit: 21st DECEMBER 1968
RANGERS STADIUM, LOFTUS ROAD, LONDON


QUEENS PARK RANGERS 1
NEWCASTLE UNITED 1 (Alan Foggon)


(OLD) DIVISION ONE

ATTENDANCE 16,444 (1,000 Toon fans----aall in 'The Loft'!)


 

  

"SERVIN' WOR APPRENTICESHIPS!"





"MERRY XMAS FROM SHEPHERDS BUSH!"




 
This was Q.P.R.'s inaugrial season in the 'top flight', and we arrived in good time, (six am again!) for this Christmas fixture at Shepherd's Bush. (where Q.P.R. play)

('We' bein', Me, Billy, Dylan, Collie and Dekka)



Shepherd's Bush waz aalso the 'home' of two of mee telly cult hero's of the time, namely, Harold and Albert Steptoe, who were 'rag 'n' bone' men in the classic 'Steptoe and Son'. Alang with their trusted horse 'Hurcules' they used tih trawl the streets of London collectin' anythin' from scrap metal tih peoples cast off clayz.


 


And low and behold!, az we were mekin' wor way tih the groond, a horse 'n' cart appeared around the corner with a gadgie shoutin' sommik unprenooncable at the top of hiz voice! (az they did!)



                                                                

And I 'kid you not', he waz the 'spit' of Harold with hiz cloth cap, lang sideborns, scruffy coat and rolled doon wellies! He waz deein' a roarin' trade az he strolled alang with half an aad car exhaust pipe as an impromptu waalkin' stick!


 
(Aa naa that it's a rare sight theeze days, but!, back in the 60's, rag 'n' bone men were a common sight on the streets of Britain) (az were milkmen!---remember them???)


 
Hiz cart was full tih the brim, with an aad tin bath tekin' 'pride of place' on the top of the pile of junk, as his horse (Hercules II?) 'clip clopped' it's way doon the street!

The anly problem of course, was---it WAS'NT Harold!---but! (az yh dee!) ah felt ah had tih have a bit 'crack' with him anyway!


 
For a laugh ah asked where hiz faatha Albert waz, but aall ah got waz one of those: "YEE'D BETTA F*** OFF!, OR ALL BRAY YIH WI' MEE 'WAALKIN' STICK'", looks! (needless tih say---ah did'nt press him for an answer and 'hurried' towards the floodlights!)


 
ANYWAY!---(and getting' back tih futbaall matters!) 'The Leazes End Boot Boys' had came doon in force, and their aim that day was tih 'take' 'The Loft', which was the Rangers 'End'.

Wih entered the groond and before lang aall hell broke loose!

"YOUR GONNA GET YOUR F*****' HEADS KICKED IN!", the 'Boot Boys' sang az they charged towards the terrified Q.P.R. fans, boots and fists flyin'!


They found little resistance, and the Toon fans showed their Rangers counterparts plenty of 'Christmas spirit', by chasin' them to the other end of the groond!.


Because there was nee segregation, and very few aall ticket games in them days, it became the 'done thing' tih try and tek the 'Home Ends', and tih do so was a 'feather in the cap' for the 'Boot Boys'.


As far as they were concerned, another 'End' had been taken tih add tih the 'HIT' 'LIST'!, although, tih be fair tih Q.P.R., they neva had a reputation for bein' 'hard cases' and they were considered 'easy meat' for 'The Leazes Enders'!


(There's one thing for certain, we DEFENATELY would'nt be on the Q.P.R. fans, 'Christmas card' 'LIST'!) (For THAT YEAR at least!)


"THE LEAZES END IS HERE!---THE LEAZES END IS HERE!", the Toon fans sang triumphantly, as though wi'd won the war or sommik!?.


It's amazin' tih think nuw, that back in the 'sixties', there was nee attempt at aall tih try and segregate rival fans, and yih could just gan anywhere yih wanted tee in the groonds, by payin' at the turnstiles. (Try deein' that nuw!)


 
'The Loft' was behind one of the goals and had a low pitched roof which covered aboot half the spectators. To wor reet was the main stand, again this had a low roof and was aall seated with the touchline so close to the fence that fans could actually grab the players as they took a throw in!


 
Opposite this was the brand new South Africa Road Stand (nee where near---by the way!) that had been opened at the start of the season to 'commemorate' Rangers forst ever visit to the top flight, with seats at the back and a lower stand underneath, which had a small standin' terrace to the front (now private boxes!)


 
Behind the other goal was an open terrace with maisonettes 'pearin' ower the back. This was aalso the 'end' of the groond that aa 'spotted' Harold Steptoe and his 'orse (now 'remamed' 'The Rag 'n' Bone End'!)


The game at Loftus Road was an uninspirin' affair as Rangers huffed and puffed and ran aroond a lot, but 'The Toon' seemed to contain them fairly comfortably for most of the match. The Magpies relied on the occasional coonter-attack and the best that can be said aboot the game was that it was 'hard and rugged'.





 
The Toon were mid-table and Q.P.R. were 'rock bottom', so predictableee!, we were expected to win easily, aalthough, it was Rangers who had more of the possession in the orly stages. But!---on the other hand, it was Newcastle who created the more scorin' chances owerraall.

 
In fact, we would have won quite easily if it had not been for Ron Springett in the Rangers' goal as he produced some spectacular saves. He anly made one mistake – but it was a costly one!. He should have held on to a Pop Robson corner in the 16th minute but he dropped the baall and eighteen year old Alan Foggon, who played on the
wing that day, reacted quickest, pooncin' to open the scorin' at 'The Rag 'n' Bone End'.

 
'The Cragheed Flier' (where Foggon came from) frequently had the Rangers' defence in trouble with his pace and exuberance although his positionin' left sommik to be desired. Nevertheless, he forced Springett into a top class save late in the forst half as the 'keeper went full length to hold a shot by the Beatles-mopped winger.

 
The heavy pitch was strength sappin' as it was covered in thick sticky clarts and both teams were leg weary as the game approached its closing stages. Unpredictableee!---just when it seemed like we were gannih collect both points, (2 points for a win, then) a fatal lapse in concentration by the defence five minutes from time allowed Rangers to equalise. It seemed more by luck than intention that a clearance upfield by Bobby Keetch landed just in the right place for Barry Bridges to score with the Tyneside defence at sixes and sevens.

 
It seemed as if the final whistle came two or three minutes orly which upset Les Allen, the QPR manager. He felt that they might have got the winner, a view not shared by Jawnil reporter Bob Cass, "I didn't fancy their chances of scoring before Shepherd's Bush became a dense forest", he wrote.
Certainly The Toon were well worth their point – a point that kept them in 12th place in the league.

(Unfortunatly for QPR, they stayed rooted tih the bottom, and come May, they were relegated back tih the old Second Division)


After the match wih headed for the centre of London, where the older Toon fans had gone for a 'gargel'. Not bein' or lookin' old enough tih get in the Bars, wih had tih stay ootside and 'cadge' a 'swig' off them, every nuw and again, when they sneaked the beer oot tih us!.


(Yih could say we were bein' 'weened' and were 'servin' wor apprenticeships'!)


At 'chuckin' oot time', wih headed for Kings Cross tih catch the bus yem, but not before nearly 'keelin ower' with the half dozen or so 'liquids' that wi'd each consumed!.

(Divvint forget!---ah was still a 'spring chicken' aged 14 (and a half!) and the 'apprenticeship weenin process' was still in it's orly stages back then!)



Aa got yem at 'seven a.m. bells' and crashed oot in mee 'pit' for the whole of Sunday with a rather large hangower! And it was just az well that a'd broke up for the school Christmas holidays, az the next day was a 'non starter' iz well!

(It's not easy bein' an 'apprentice'!) ("OH!"------"MEE ACHIN' HEED!")


 
©Fink (the mad-sad grundhpper!)

 

Wednesday 20 December 2023

Chelseee 1. The Toon 1 (Chelseee win 4-2 on pens) Leegue Cup qwaataa Final

 Posted '4:10pm bell🛎️'s Wedinzday 20th Decembaa 2023



“STOPPAGE TIME SICKNESS 🤧 STRIKES AGAIN!”

Followin on from the heartbreak stoppage time 'penalty'? equaliser in Paris the other week, which ultimately cost us a place in The Champions Leegue knockout stage, it happened again in west London, when the normally reliable, but tired lookin Kieron Trippier, played a weak heeder to Chelsee’z Mudryk and he said “thank you very much” az he fired the baall home to level the score in the 92nd minute,after Callum Wilson had given us the lead in the 16th minute! 



NUFC were just 2 minutes away from a famous victory and a place in the semi finals! (A sickener for certain!)

Penalty kicks were then taken at ‘wor end’, but it did nee good az both Trippier and Ritchie failed to score, az we lost 4-2, to break the hearts of the 4,300 Toon fans, who were in both the lower and upper seats of The Shed End! (Wilson and Bruno scored wor 2 goals)



It started off well az we kicked towards the far goal and within 16 minutes we were in front when Callum Wilson raced through their defence and hit a sweet shot into the far corner of the net to send the packed away end at the opposite end of the pitch crazy!

For most of the rest of the game it woz ‘backs to the waall stuff’ az Chelseee peppered wor goal!

Indeed in the 2nd half it woz aall 'them' az the Toon foot soldiers battled away to stop the onslaught!—and then THAT misstayk by Trippier, who looked absolutleee nackered! (He needs a rest, like most of wor players!)

We must dust worselz doon and gan again at Lutin on Saturday in wot seems like a game every 3 days at the moment! (26 games played so far and it isnt even Xmas!)



Attendance: 38,058 (4,300 stunned Toon fans!)

*NUFCs penalty shootout record iz truly abysmal! Just 3 wins oot of 12 since 1970


Magical Mystery Pub Crawl Tour 2023-2024 (3 boozers visited)
Betjamin Arms St Pancras. London
Duke on the Green. parsons Green. London




The Goose. Fulham. London



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