Wednesday 30 November 2011

'BROKEN NOSE BRUCE' GETS THE BULLET!

Posted '8;30 pm bells' Wednesday 30th November 2011
"HELP!---AM  I  A SAD mackem B*****D!???
---OR!---A FAT GEORDIE b*****d!????
---OR!---BOTH!?????"

Poor old 'Broken Nose Bruce'!----The Toon fans caall him a 'SAD mackem B*****D!---the mackems caall him a FAT GEORDIE b*****d!----he cannit win!--can he?----He then gans on to say--
"I can't help where I was born!" (Corbridge-on Tyne, before movin' to Waallsend-on-Tyne) implyin' that he is ashamed of his Tyneside upbringin'---and then the SAD mackem B*****DS  F*****' SACK HIM!---Poor old 'Broken Nose Bruce'!!!

GARY SPEED---FANS TRIBUTE PLANNED

Posted '1:25 pm bells' Wednesday 30th November 2011

The front page of todays 'Ronny-Gill'
Quote: "Gary Speed will be remembered with stirring tributes before Newcastle United's home match this weekend.
A rendition of the moving Welsh hymn 'Bread of Heaven' will be sung before Saturday's game against Chelsea, followed by a minutes applause from fans.
A special edition of the match programme will include memories of the player who served the Magpies for six years.
Tributes have continued to pour in for the 42 year old who was found dead on Sunday"
TRIBUTES ARE LEFT @ THE MAIN ENTRANCE TO ST JAMES' PARK

THE TOON RESORVES 2 v THE PIT YAKKERS!---0

Updated '9:20 am bells' Wednesday 30th November 2011

"PIT YAKKERS IN TOON!"
"THE RAIN LASHES DOON @ BLUE FLAMES!"
(HENCE THE BLURRED PICTURE!)
Last neet @ '7:30 bells' The Toon's second string
took on 'The Pit Yakkers of Ashington' in the qwaata finals of The Northumberland Senior Cup @ Blue Flames (aka Whitley Park)
For some reason we wore wor orange away strip and Ashington wore their black 'n' white stripes, despite us bein' the home team?

'The Pit Yakkers' had been in brilliant form, havin' put SIX past Penrith on Saturday and SEVEN past Bishop Auckland last midweek!
 But this didn't stop The Toon's Aussie midfielder Brad Inman from inflictin' a 2-0 defeat on them with two fine second half strikes in the pourin' rain and wind in front of a sparse crowd!
Attendance: 317 (includin' at least 150 Pit Yakkers!)

The Toon resorves now face the mouth waaterin prospect of a possible visit to 'Team Northumbria' in the semi finals, which is just doon the road from Blue Flames and is the anly groond left in the competition that we havvent been te before! (Newcastle Benfield and Bedlington Terriers are the otha semi finalists---two groonds we've previously visited!)

Tuesday 29 November 2011

IT'S AALL 'GREEK' TO ME!

Posted '3:00 pm bells' Tuesday 29th November 2011
"SHOES UP!---FOR 'THE GEORDIE TIMES'!"

'The Geordie Times' haz just received it's 500th 'hit' from Greece and we thank aall wor loyal reeders from that part of Europe for loggin in.

The 19,000 total hits mark from aroond the world (and beyond!) haz aalso been passed and we thank each and every one of yoo for your support!
114 countries have now viewed 'The Geordie Times'

The 'Top Ten' countries totals are az follows.

1 UNITED KINGDOM-----------------10,340 hits
  (England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales)
2 UNITED STATES of AMERICA----2,588 hits
3 REPUBLIC of IRELAND---------------529 hits
4 GREECE----------------------------------506 hits
5 GERMANY--------------------------------353 hits
6 NIGERIA-----------------------------------259 hits
7 HOLLAND--------------------------------196 hits
8 AUSTRALIA------------------------------179 hits
9 CANADA----------------------------------151 hits
10 RUSSIA-----------------------------------115 hits

And countries who have viewed us recentleee!

"Hello! Kuwait!---Hello! Morocco!---Hello! Jersey!---Hello! Maldives!" 

Sunday 27 November 2011

THE COCKNEY REDS of SALFORD 1 THE TOON 1

Updated 11:20 pm bells' Sunday 27th November 2011

"SAVED BY THE FLYIN' SQUAD!"
An excellent performance from 'The Black 'n' Whites' ensured we came away from 'The Theatre of Muppets' with a creditable draw against the 'current' (but not for much langer!) leegue champions.

It was a case of 'da va ju' as far az we were concorned, az this was wor 2nd visit in 7 days to Manc-land and we heeded for one of wor fave 'haunts' from the previous week--namely 'Retro Bar' which iz tucked into one of the city centre side streets, off the beaten track where a large brekky and a pint of hooch to wash it doon with, was the forst order of the day!

A few more visits to drinkin dens 'off the beaten track' were then made, includin' a boozer that selt ST JAMES' PARK BITTER, (where a few pints were consumed 'for luck'!),  

before heedin' for Old Trafford on the 'cattle-truck train'.
(Aa say 'cattle-truck' coz it was that chocker, yi couldn't move!)

The station iz nicely positioned ootside the visitors tornstiles with a 20 yard waalk from entrance to entrance!

We played 'canny' durin' the forst half, although the home side did miss several good chances to tek the lead.
A hand baall decision in the penalty area we were attackin', wasn't given near the end of the half, which could clearly be seen by yours truelee and the rest of the 1,800 Toon fans present, but 'justice would be done' in the 2nd half (reeed on!)

Within fower minutes of the restart Man U took the lead in unfortunate circumstances when a Wayne Rooney shot deflected off two players and into the net.
THE MAIN STAND PADDOCK-
OLD TRAFFORD!
The 70,000 plus 'muppets' who had been quiet up til this point suddenly foond their voices for a few minutes but it then went back to deathly silence as the 'Toon few' ootsang them in the visitors corner.

Qwaata of an hour later,though, we were back on level torms when a controversial penalty was awarded to us by the linesman at The Stretford End, after the ref had gave a corner from a Rio Ferdinand challenge on the Toon's Ben Arfa.

SIX! Man U players then suroonded the ref and linesman to try and get the decision owertorned but the linesman who iz a Flight Sargeant in the R.A.F. , would have non of it and the ref gave the penalty much to the fury of 'Fergie' who's red face started tornin' porple on the touchline!

Demba Ba stepped up to take the spot kick to a creshendo of boos from The Stretford End but he cooly slotted the baall into the reet hand side of the goal to send the 1,800 Toon fans wild with delight. (justice had been done!)

More drama followed when 'Spiderman' was sent off in the 78th minute but the ten men held on thanx mainly to some heroic defendin' from Tim Krul, Steve Taylor and Danny Simpson inparticular!

Deep into injury time Man U scored, but immediately the linesman on wor side 'came to the rescue this time' and put his flag up and the goal was (thankfully!) ruled 'offside'! (ne protests this time!)


A great result on wot was NUFC's 130th borthday!----let the celebrations begin!



Attendance:75,594 (1,800 Toon fans)


  

GARY SPEED---R.I.P.

Posted '6:00 pm bells' Sunday 27th November 2011

The very sad news that 42 year old Gary Speed has passed away, has been reported on aall the news channels today.
Midfielder Gary played 285 times for us and scored 40 goals between 1998 and 2004 and will be sadly missed!
He was a great servant to the club.

R.I.P. GARY! 

Saturday 26 November 2011

HAPPY 130th BORTHDAY TO US!

Posted '6:00 am bells' Saturday 26th November 2011
"HAPPY BORTHDAY NEW-CAS-SEL!,
HAPPY BORTDAY TO YOO!"

NUFC---A HISTORY LESSON! 

On this day 130 years ago in 1881 Newcastle United were 'born', in the shape of 'Stanley FC' who played in Stanley Street near to St Peters Basin and not far the River Tyne.
SITE OF 'STANLEY FC' GROOND

In 1882 they changed their name to 'Newcastle East End' and moved to a groond just off Chillingham Road in Heaton.

'Newcastle West End' moved to St James' Park in 1884, the former home of 'Newcastle Rangers' who forst played there in 1880.

'East End' then moved to St James' Park where they amalgamated with 'West End' to become 'Newcastle United' in 1892

The Cockney Reds of Salford  v THE TOON
"70,000 MUPPETS!"

Today, az well of course, we travel back to 'Manc-land for the 2nd time in 7 days to face 'The Salford Reds' @ 'The Theatre of Muppets' @ '3 bells' this afternoon.

We're lettin' the '7:25 bells' train, take the strain again and we'll be drinkin' in wor 'regular haunts' near Piccadilly Station before the match.

Lets hope it's a 'Borthday Bonanza' and NOT a 'Borthday Baalls-up' and that we can get that elusive win there, for the forst time in in 39 years!? (actually!--a'd be very happy with a point!)

(Match report to follow when we get back---probably on Sunday)

Friday 25 November 2011

130th BOTHDAY CELEBRATIONS TOMORROW!---BUT FOR WHO???---WATCH THIS SPACE!

Posted '1:45 pm bells' Friday 24th November 2011
"A '130 YEAR OLD' WAS BORN AND USED TO LIVE HERE!---
BUT JUST WHO IZ IT???"

There's a very special borthday celebration tomorrow for a very special 130 year old!

But just who is it!???----- Yoooll just have to 'log in' to www.geordietimes.com  in the mornin' to find oot!

DARLO DELIGHT!

Posted '10:35 am bells' Friday 24th November 2011

The Toon's U18's will face Darlo's U18's in the FA Youth Cup @ St James' Park on Thorsday 8th December KO '7 bells' and not Whitley Park, Benton as was rumoured.

This iz great news for 'Darlo groundhoppers' as they have neva played @ 'The Cathedral on the Hill' before! (whey!--- not in MY lifetime, anyway!)  and I'm sure that they will bring a canny few fans up!

Admission will be @ The East Stand (£3 for big kids and £1 for sprogs and zimmerframeites)

Tuesday 22 November 2011

THE TOON RESORVES 0 v THE TOFFEE NOSES RESORVES 4---LOCKOOT FINAL SCORE!

Updated '4:00 pm bells' Tuesday 22st November 2011
"LERRIZ  IN  YI  B******S!"

"TOON COME UNSTUCK AGAINST TOFFEES!"

Wor second string game against wor Everton coonterparts was regretably played behind closed doors @ Benton Trainin' Groond @ '2 bells' this afternoon. 
We lost 4-0! with McAleny, Vellios (2) and Forshaw scorin' the visitors goals.
Just why they divvint let fans in for a resorve game on the trainin' pitches, but DO for junior games iz beyond me!
A'm on neetshift toneet and would have went if aa could iv got in!
-- (Just az well aa didn't gan!--"EH!")
Attendance: NEBODY! (apart from players friends & families!)

Otha news: Spors 2-0 win last neet in the premya leegue, means that we slip to 4th place on goal difference

Sunday 20 November 2011

700,000 REASONS TO BELIEVE!

Posted '12:45 pm bells' Sunday 20th November 2011

"WE'VE GOT MORE FANS THAN YOU!---MANCHESTER!---MANCHESTER!"

The sub-titles on the BBC's 'Match of the Day' prove beyond any doubt that we have the best and most supporters on the planet, with a new 'world record' travellin' support of!---wait for it!
700,000 FANS!
("Er!"---and in the reeel world!)
(See below!)

THE BLUE MOONIES 3 THE TOONIES 1

Posted '9:40 am bells' Sunday 20th November 2011

"YOU ONLY SOLD ONE TIER!"

Whey!---it had to come to an end at some point and to lose to a team who will surely win the leeegue is no disgrace.
202 days withoot defeat in the premya leegue is a club record that is unlikely to be beaten and we'll just have to regroup for another visit to 'Manc-land' when we face 'The  Cockney Reds of Salford' next Saturday.
We didn't play badly in fact and to give TWO penalties away cost us the game.
We held wor own until the 40th minute when  Ryan Taylor handled in the box at the far end from us and Balotelli cooly placed his penaly into the corner of the net. Another blunder from Taylor bang on half time gifted the baall to Richards who took his chance well to double City's lead.

Ben Arfa then rattled the woodwork orly in the 2nd half for us, but the baall 'cruely' rebounded off the post and alang the goal line, when we aall thought that it was gannin in!
City increased their lead when another penalty was awarded when Ben Arfa fouled Richards and Aguero put the spot kick beyond Tim Krul in the Toon goal.
The City fans took the p*ss chantin' that we'd anly sold one tier of the away end, when we normally get two. This was because NUFC can't be bothered with the hassle of sellin' loads of away tickets as they don't make any money oot of it.
(The City fans obviously didn't naa this and it was embaracin'!)
(It's a total disgrace if you ask me!---For wor game @ 'The Theatre of Muppets' next week we've anly taken the minimum 1,800 away tickets, when we could have had more than double this!)

Some irresponsible Toon idiot then responded to the taunts by hoyin' a fire cracker into the home end and the City fans understandably 'went mental' and bottles and other missiles then started rainin' doon on wor section.

We then got a consulation goal in the last minute of normal time when Dan Gosling had the easiest of chances to fire home into an empty net!

Attendance: 47,408 which iz the highest crowd ever at this groond) (anly 1,700 Toon fans though!---not wor fault---blame the club!)

Aall good things must come to an end!---but hang on a minute!---aa might be clutchin' at straws but we havvent been beaten at home since we lost to Everton on 5th March!---THAT'S! 260 DAYS SINCE THE TOON LAST LOST A HOME GAME! (and coontin'!)

Saturday 19 November 2011

202 DAYS SINCE THE TOON LAST LOST A PREMIER LEAGUE GAME! (6 MONTHS and 18 DAYS!)
This iz the forst time in wor entire history that we have broke the 200 day barrier withoot losin' a league game! (since 1893!)

Of course there's the little matter of a Premya Leegue game at table toppers Man City today, who are aalso unbeaten in the leegue this season!

(42 YEAR OLD ARCHIVE FA CUP MATCH REPORT FROM MAINE ROAD BELOW)

THE BLUE MOONIES v THE TOONIES!

Updated 5:55 am bells' Saturday 19th November 2011
Sommik haz got to give in wor game against Man City this afternoon  @ 'The City of Manchester Stadium' (it's original name!) as both clubs are unbeaten in the leegue since last May! (we hold the 'upper hand' by 7 days!)

We are underdogs of course but we must 'keep the faith' and hope that wor 'run' continues until next week at least!
'The Geordie Times' iz on the '7:24 bells' trans Pennine train in the mornin' and a few 'gargels' on the train and in Manchester city centre will be the order of the day!

We will have anly  1,700 Toon Travellers at the game and attempts to obtain more tickets have faallen by the wayside!

Full match (& waaterin hole!) report to follow on Sunday!

Friday 18 November 2011

"STRAWBERRY FIELDS FOREVER!"

Updated '2:30 pm bells' Friday 18th November 2011

SENSATIONAL PICTURES! have reached 'The Geordie Times' from 'Finks' camera phone az he was dein' a 'pub crawl' on Thorsday afternoon, aboot a name change for an iconic Newcasel pub!

'The Strawberry' which lies in the shadow of St James' Park iz 'no more' az wor 'exclusive' 'neva seen before' photo clearleee shows!---
"3 CHEERS FOR THE MANAGER!
HIP!-HIP!-HORRAY!---HIP!-HIP!-HORRAY!---HIP!-HIP!-HORRAY!"

"MEANWHILE!--ONE FAN'S, 'ONE MAN' PROTEST OOTSIDE 'THE GALLOWGATE END', IN RELATION TO THE 'ATTEMPTED' NAME CHANGE OF WOR ICONIC GROOND  ENTERS A SECOND WEEK!"


"IN OTHA NEWS--- A FAN DIGS UP HIS FAATHA'Z HERITAGE STONE AT ST JAMES' PARK IN PROTEST AT THE 'ATTEMPTED' NAME CHANGE OF THE GROOND!"

"AND HE REPLACED IT WITH THIS!---
A BLANK GREY STONE!!!"



















Wednesday 16 November 2011

MAN CITY ARCHIVE REPORT FROM 1969---WHEN THE BELL TOLLS!

Updated '3:00 pm bells' Wednesday 16th November 2011
'The Geordie Times' hazzent done an archive report for ages---so!--- as we are playin' Man City away on Saturday a'm gannih dig oot mee aad 'mad-sad groundhoppers' match report from wor FA Cup tie @ Maine Road against them way back in 1969 and will publish it online TOMORROW!---
"WHEN THE BELL TOLLS!"

Watch this space!

SMB RESORVES v TOON RESORVES---TOONEET @ THE S.O.S.

Updated '9:10 pm bells' Wednesday 16th November 2011
"WELCOME TO sund'lind!"--- 
(JUST OFF THE MAIN THOROUGHFARE TO THE S.O.S!)

Tooneet wor second string took on the SMB's second string @ The Stadium Of Ssshhh! ("ye naa wot!"), kick off  was at '7 bells'.
Willie Donachie's team were be made up of mostly youngins and unfortunately we lost 3-0
Attendance: 3,826 (400 Toon fans)

Tuesday 15 November 2011

"LET'S BE 'AVIN' YER MONEY!"---IT'S A SELLOOT!

Updated '7:25 pm bells' Tuesday 15th November 2011
"HAVE YER SEEN THE PRICE OF CUSTARD
THEEZE DAYS!?"
'Delia's,  Rhubarb  and Custard Crumbles' are gettin' very expensive, aa can tell yiz! 
For, 'tupence haapny' Norwich have charged us FORTY FIVE QUID! for wor forthcomin' trip to 'Bernard Matthews Country'
We have now sold oot wor measly allocation of 1,400 tickets for this non televised  game on Saturday 10th December @ '3 bells'

This meenz that they are second anly to 'The Rag and Bone Men' of Shepherds Bush az the most expensive away tickets so far this season.
For wor next  away game at 'champions elect' Man City, we are bein' charged THORTY EIGHT QUID! to get in, and their 'The Cockney Glory Hunter' 'quiet neighbours' across the city are chargin' us FORTY THREE QUID! a week later. 

The away ticket prices that 'The Geordie Times' haz paid so far this season iz!---

(highest to lowest)

  1 QPR £45(some fans paid £50!) (premya leegue)
  2 Norwich £45 (premya leegue)(SMB's paid £35!)
=3 Villa      £43  (premya leegue)
=3 Man U   £43  (premya leegue)
  5 Man C   £38  (premya leegue)
  6 SMB's   £35  (premya leegue)
  7 Wolves £34   (premya leegue)
  8 Stoke    £30   (lowest in premya leegue so far!)
  9 B/burn  £20   (leegue cup)
10 Scunny £19   (leegue cup)
11 Forest   £17 (leegue cup)

PS: The Toon charge away fans in Level 7 of 'The Leazes End' between £25 (Wigan etc) and £42 (Man U etc)

Sunday 13 November 2011

'LLAMBS TO THE SLAUGHTER' TIRADE!

Updated '6:30 am bells' Monday 14th November 2011
"BA! BAAA!   SHEARER'S BAR IS NEXT!
NO ONE LIKES US!---WE DONT CARE!"

The latest 'tirade' (printed in the 'Sunday Mirror') from wor 'BELOVED' M.D. 'Llambs to the Slaughter', meks very interestin' readin'. First he slags off Toon legends 'Special K' and 'Big Al' before roondin' on the fans in an 'alleged' drunken stupor.   
"YOU GUYS DONT UNDERSTAND HOW F****** HORRIBLE WE CAN BE!", he iz quoted az sayin' to the amazed fans in 'The Sharks Gastro Bar' ower the road from "ER!"--- ST JAMES' PARK!

"OH! Y-E-S! WE  F*****'  DE NAA!!!"

Saturday 12 November 2011

THE BLYTH-TYNE FA CUP DERBY------THE HEEDBANGERS WIN!

Updated '9:30 pm bells' Saturday 12th November 2011
At 3:00' bells' this afternoon the Spartans of Blyth took on the heedbangers of Gatesheed in the forst roond of the FA Cup @ Croft Park, Blyth and az there were ne premya leegue games  tekin place  because of yet anotha International break a canny good crowd waz antisipated.

The Heed won 2-0 to progress to the 2nd roond of the competition with their goals comin' from Shaw in the 14th minute and Cummins in the 54th minute in front of a very good crowd of  2,763 (ower 1,000 Gatesheed fans) 



'The Geordie Times' however! WAZ hopin' to take in the Toon U18s game against Derby @ Benton, but we were 'runnin late' and  didn't make it! 

Full time----The Toon U18s 4  (Dan Taylor (2), Andy Dales (og) and JJ Hooper
Derby Coonty U18s 3

The Toon were 4-0 up at one stage!

Attendance 100 (estimated)

THE 'ST JAMES' NAME WILL LIVE FOREVERMORE!

Posted '10:30 am bells Saturday 12th November 2011

ST JAMES' PARK 'ATTEMPTED' NAME CHANGE---LATEST FAN REACTION!

The general consensus of opinion amongst Toon fans aa met on Friday afternooon, (whilst oot 'on the hoy'!), was that the name 'St James' Park' will live forevermore, and aa couldn't find ANYBODY who will caall it anythin' else!

The City cooncil haz said that, "Some things are beyond profit!", and there iz NE WAY that they are gannin to change ANY road or footpath direction signs to St James' Park.
'St James' Boulevard', which iz the main thoroughfare to the groond, will remain the SAME NAME, az will 'St James' Street' where the groond took it's name from in 1880!

'Nexus', who run the 'Metro' undergroond trains have aallso hoyed a spanner into the works by declarin' that St James' Metro Station's name WILL STAY THE SAME! ("good on them aall!")

A 'veteran fan' in hiz mid seventies caalled Alfie, who haz followed The Toon since he was, "Knee high to a magpie!" in the 1940's, and haz a season ticket in 'The East Stand', summed every fans feelings up when he said, "'The Fat Controller' can caall it wot he likes!, but it will aalways be St James' Park to me!  A'v caalled it that for ower seventy years and a'm NOT! gannih change now!"

AND SO SAY AALL OF US, ALFIE!
(subject closed!)

Friday 11 November 2011

THE BIRTH OF ST JAMES' PARK***SEPTEMBER 1880

Posted '2:10 pm bells' Friday 11th November 2011    
(Taken from the book: 'UNITED  THE  FIRST  100 YEARS')

Newcastle Rangers were formed in1878 and first played on 'The Drill Field', Alexandria Road in GATESHEAD because they couldn't find a pitch in their native town. (This is the site of Gateshead F.C.'s proposed new groond!)
They eventually moved across the Tyne taking over an enclosed ground close to Leazes Terrace in September 1880.
The pitch was immediately referred to as 'ST JAMES' PARK'. (St James Street is next to Leazes Terrace)

The following month the 'Newcastle Journal' noted that the Rangers club had, "Inaugurated their new ground close to Leazes Terrace on Saturday by a match between the first team and '15 of others'.
After a pleasant game of two hours it was found the captains team was victorious over his numerous but less experienced opponents to the extent of 6 goals to 1".

St James' Park was on the map!
The local press concluded, "The new ground is very nicely situated and is close to the centre of town. It is 120 yards by 60 yards broad and is completely level".
In spite of the latter statement the pitch in fact had a notorious slope, a drop of fully 18 feet from the north to the south goal!
          ST JAMES' PARK SINCE 1880****
               131 YEARS AND COONTIN'!

POSTED @ 11:11 on the 11th of the 11th, 11

ST JAMES' PARK PROTESTS REACHES CANADA!

Posted '10:30 am bells' Friday11th November 2011
Protesters remain in St James Park despite talk 'The City of Toronto' plans to end 'The Occupy Toronto Movements' stay in St James Park, tents remain staked in the ground and protesters vow to remain.

News of the attempted name change of St James' Park haz even reached Canada!, where protesters in the 'NUFC Canadian Branch' are campin' oot in their very own St James' Park in the centre of Toronto in a show of support! 
THANK YOO CANADA!
Gan to: www.insidetoronto.com  ('click' news)  

Thursday 10 November 2011

ST JAMES' PARK FOREVER! 1880--UNTIL ETERNITY!****131 YEARS AND COONTIN'!

Posted '2:35pm bells' Thorsday 10th November 2011
LIVE ON 'LOOK NORTH'---'THE 'RONNY GILL' SEZ IT AALL!

News of the decision to try and change the name of St James' Park for 'a few dollars more' haz sent shockwaves aroond Tyneside and beyond!

How CAN YOU change such an iconic name?---YOU CAN'T!

REMEMBER! it aalways HAZ BEEN!
St James Park!
it STILL IZ!
St James' Park!
and it aalways WILL BE!
St James' Park!

"WE ARE IN 'TOTAL' SHOCK!!!"

Posted '10:10 am bells' Thorsday 10th November 2011
"HOW DOES ---'THE FAT CONTROLLER ARENA' ---SOUND???"

Not content with plasterin' a certain 'red, white and blue' sports brand logo in EVERY SINGLE PART of 'ST JAMES' PARK', 'The Fat Controller' haz now decided to rename THE GROOND az well!---to be caalled!-----'THE S***** D***** ARENA' ('The Geordie Times' refuses point black to utter or print this GHASTLY name!)

It's been caalled 'ST JAMES' PARK'  for
131 YEARS (since 1880!) and az far az we are concorned it will be 'ST JAMES' PARK' 'FOREVER MORE!'----FULL  STOP.

Saturday 5 November 2011

THE TOON 2 THE TOFFEE NOSES 1

Posted '9:50 pm bells' 'Bonfire Neet' 2011

The unbeaten run just gans on! and on! and on! az we beat a very resiliant Everton 2-1 at St James' today.

A pin point cross from Danny Simpson in the 12th minute had the Toffees defence panickin' and John Heitinga vollied into his aan net @ The Gallowgate End to give us the lead!

Wor lead waz then doubled when Ryan Taylor hit a wonderous shot off the crossbar which reboonded into the visitors goal to send the 50,000 plus crowd into delerium (er!--apart from the Evertonion contingent-- that iz!)

The 'mickey mousers' then pulled one back, 'deed on half time' when Jack Rodwell levelled with a 'free heeder' at 'The Leazes End' in front of their near 3,000 fans in 'Level 7'

It was 'aall hands to the pump' in the second period az the visitors went aall oot for the equaliser, but The Toon managed to 'haad oot' and we secured wor seventh win of the season to move up (briefly!) to second place in the premya leegue table! ( Man U beat the SMB's 1-0 a couple of hours later to regain second spot!)
We are now THIRD (again!) and the 'party' continued well into the night with fireworks displays aall ower Tyneside to celebrate another win! (nothin' to de with 'Guy Fawkes' of course!)
Attendance: 50,671 (nearly 3,000 Evertonians)

The '100 pub crawl challenge' started off disastrously when the forst boozer we tried to visit wasn't open till '12 bells' (The Enigma!) and the second (Linekers) was aallso closed (permanently!) so we were telt!  
Wor thord on the list (Number 28 Bar) was aalso shut! (god help us!) so we had to 'slum it' in 'The Black Garter' to eventually de wor forst pub of the day @ '11:30 bells'!


The anly otha boozer we managed to visit before the match waz 'The Irish Club' where we bumped into a few aad scouse mates who were up from Morseyside for the game!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

'The 100 pub crawl challenge' continued after the game and several new 'waaterin' holes' were added to 'the list'! (will update 'the list' tomorrow!---or when aa sober up!)

THE TOON v THE TOFFEE NOSES

Posted '9:00 am bells' Saturday 5th November, 2011
"NO!---NOT THAT! ENIGMA!"
We face the toffee noses of Everton @ '12:45 bells' today in wot will be wor sixth, 'live on the telly' game, of the season.
We are lookin' to extend wor unbeaten record to FOURTEEN premya leegue games and 188 days and this bonfire day extraveganza iz sure to be a lively affair with plenty of 'fireworks' guaranteed @ St James'!
If? we win, we will gan up to SECOND PLACE! in the table for two hours at least! (Man U play the SMB's @ '3 bells', so second place cud be short lived!) 


'The Geordie Times 100 pub crawl challenge' starts off @ 'The Enigma' near to the old Worswick Street Bus Station today @ '11 bells' and yer aall  welcome to join us @ 'pub number 33'

Match and 'pub crawl' report to follow much later az per usual!

Friday 4 November 2011

NUFC RECORD BREAKERS!

Posted '1:00 pm bells' Friday 4th November 2011

A'v been traalin' through the record books to see the best undefeated sequences in the clubs history, to match the six month sequence we have at the moment.
And I have to tell yooo!--- that the current unbeaten run in the league iz wor!----- LANGEST EVER! since we joined the Futbaall League way back in 1893!

The top three sequences are az follows:

1: May 2nd 2011 to date*****
187 days unbeaten in the league (and coontin'!)

2: May 1st 1994 to October 28th 1994****
181 days unbeaten in the league

3: April 16th 1950 to October 6th 1950***
174 days unbeaten in the league

Thursday 3 November 2011

FAIRS CLUB @ HOWDEN TONEET!

Posted '1:15 pm bells' Thorsday 3rd November 2011

The annual meetin' of the Fairs Cup winnin' team of 1969 takes place toneet @ The Howden Club near Waallsend.
'The Fairs Club' event iz a selloot as usual and haz been organised by Bill Gibbs (az usual!)
Iz it reeely 42 YEARS since we last won a major trophy!?

Wednesday 2 November 2011

WHEN IRISH 'WHEY AYE'S' ARE SMILIN'!

Posted '9:30 pm bells'  Wednesday 2nd November 2011

THE SIGN SAYS---"GUINNESS IS GOOD FOR YOU!"

'The Geordie Times' haz just had it's FIVE HUNDREDTH hit today from the Republic of Ireland and they are second oweraall in the overseas 'hit list' behind the USA---Have a 'pint of the black and white stuff' on me lads and lasses!---
"Whey aye maan!"----"Cheers!"

WE FORGOT THAT YOU WERE HERE!

Posted '3:15 pm bells' Wednesday 2nd November 2011

Both Man City and Man U away tickets are now sold oot!---For both games we have taken wor MINIMUM! allocation of tickets!, SO!--- instead of havin' aroond 4,000 at each game, we will have!---wait for it!---just 1,700 fans @ Man City and 1,800 fans @ Man U!---a DISGRACEFUL state of affairs when we could easily have sold 4,000 for each game!---wot the hell's the club playin' at????
'GEORDIE TIMES' total pageviews---17,340
Alexa Traffic Rank 24,046,172
For some reason unbeknown to 'man or beast', the 'hit' coonta in the reet hand side-bar isn't workin' for some reeeders!? so! until the problem iz solved aa'll post the 'hits' at the top of the page!
Meanwhile!---Wor 'Google' 'Alexa Traffic Rank has went up 39,254 places to 24,046,172 oot of the 156,000,000 websites aroond the globe!

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