Friday, 16 November 2018

AALL IN VAIN!

Posted '2:15pm bells' Friday 16th November 2018
"I'M GOING NOWHERE!"

While NUFC face wor thord blank weekend of the season due to Internationals, we again must find wor 'fix' for the weekend and az per usual in my circumstances, we will be followin' Northern Leegue side 'The Bad Blue Boys' of Dunston when they play a home game v Stockton on Saturday afternoon!

Meenwhile 150 miles to the south, 'The Magpie Group' are planning a demonstration ootside Sports Redirect's main hub in Shirebrook!

Although 'The Geordie Times' agrees with their sentiments, it will be a wasted jorney I'm afraid, az wor beloved owner? known affectionately az 'The Fat Controller' will be anywhere but there on Saturday!---and wot will the protests achieve?---absolutely NOTHIN' I'm afraid! 
Aa meen!, he iz hardly gannin to sell the club because of any protests against him az he iz (very!) thick skinned! (AND a lang way away from Shirebrook!)

NO! the anly way we will get rid of him iz if a very rich buyers comes alang and rumour haz it that an USA investor iz interested this time!---We've hord aall this before of course and just like the muthaa in law who lives with yoo---and who yoo cant get rid of---the same iz true of 'The Fat Controller'---beleeeve yoo me!

CHECK IT OOT!

Posted '1:16pm bells' Thorsday 15th November 2018
Updated Friday

The draw for the next roond of The Checkatrade Trophy takes place on Friday @ '1:00pm bells'
NUFC U21s won wor group and are to be rewarded with a home tie against one of the followin':
Stoke U21s, Man City U21s, Bury's 1st team, Macclesfield's 1st team, Waalsaal's 1st team, Oldim's 1st team or Lincoln's 1st team

The tie to be played sometime in December with Wembley 'the carrot on the stick' for the final!

We have ne idea wethaa the game will take place @ St. James' Park or Blue Flames Sports groond in Benton! (aka Whitley Park)

Az soon az we find oot we will let yi naa!

Updated '1:17pm bells' Friday

Its MACCLESFIELD TOON! 
Tie to be played commencin' December 3rd

Wednesday, 14 November 2018

MAD-SAD GR😨UNDH😨PPER MAYHEM!😨!

Posted 'high noon bells' Wedinzday 14th November 2018

"COMPLETE COCKERELS COCK UP!"

It haz been reported that there iz a very reeel chance that wor game v Sporz in their new stadium in February might NOT take place az it iz still not ready, despite claims that it would definatly be open by Xmas!
Contractors are apparently tornin up on site, drunk and on drugs and some have nowt to de az deliveries have not arrived!
The loonatics are runnin the asylum in this case!


The whole situation iz a complete farce and Sporz fans are not 'happy bunnies' because of this---and neethaa are WE, 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers', who were lookin forward to a visit to a new groond---and who now face the prospect of a visit to Wembley yet again, with many of us lookin for wor forst competitive win there in 8 attempts (3 FA Cup final losses, 1 Leegue Cup final loss, 1 FA Cup semi-final loss, 1 Charity Shield loss) and 1 Premyaa Leegue loss!) (v Sporz last season)

Yoo would have to be at least 70 years old to remember and witness wor last win there, in the 1955 FA Cup final! (63 years ago and coontin'!)

There iz still a smaall chance that we WILL play at the new stadium this season----but 'divvint coont yi chickens yet'! 

PS: Az the pitch and stands are in a different place to the old ones, we class it az a new groond!

Wembley's pitch and stands are in the same place az they were before it woz rebuilt, so it izn't a new groond!
('NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' rule 37 B!)
OLD AND NEW WEMBLEY SUPER IMPOSED
(Yoo can fit the old one inside the new one!)



Tuesday, 13 November 2018

GRIMSBEEE v THE TOON U21s *** TOONEET

Posted '2:25pm bells' Tuesday 113th November 2018
Updated 10:00pm bells in Eccles on a night truck run!

Tooneet NUFCs resorve side travel to Grimsbeee for a Checkatrade Trophy match---Just one point iz needed to qualify for the last 32 and a possible meetin' with the SMBs senior team! (Can yoo imagine that---wor resorves v the mackems forst team!!!!

Anyway!--the game kicks off at '7:45 bells' and if yoo are gannin the away end iz open, priced £5 for big kids and £1 for little kids and sprogs get in FREE!

'The Geordie Times' forst visited Grimsbeee  36 years ago in 1982, where we drew 2-2 in the old 2nd Division---and we have been there a couple of times since---az this iz a resorve game on a groond we have been te before, we wont be gannin---BUT a few of the 'NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' are and we will bring yoo the result az soon az we find oot!

PS: Their groond iz actually in Cleethorpes, so divvint heed for Grimsbeee or yoo will miss the game!!!😮

Updated 10:00pm bells

FT Grimsbeee 2 The Toon U21s 3

The Toon won this 5 goal thriller after comin from behind to progress to the last 32 of the competition with a Wembley final the carrot on the end of the stick.

Goals from Callum Roberts (shot) Elias Sorensen (heeder) and Matty Longstaff (free kick) sealed the win in front of 547 includin 66 NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers!

NUFC win the group and will have a home tie in the next roond because of this---The draw iz on Friday!

Sunday, 11 November 2018

THE TOON 2 BOURNEMOOOTH 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2018-2019


Posted '10:20am bells' Remembrance Sunday 11th November 2018---Updated '11:21am bells' Munday
A DISPLAY OF POPPIES @ THE GALLOWGATE END!

"WE WILL REMEMBER THEM!"

Exactly 100 years ago today the 1st World War ended--and yesterday, az you'd expect, there woz a minutes silence at St James' Park and aall futbaall groonds around the country!

The game woz won by 2 goals in the forst half from Soloman Rondon, the 2nd a spectacular 'bullet' heeder at The Leazes End which Wyn Davies and Alan Shearer would have been proud of!

Bournemoooth pulled one back just before the break and it woz nailbitin stuff in the 2nd period az they tried to get the equaliser!
They DID'NT and for the 2nd game in a row we took the 3 points to move us up to the dizzy heights of 14th in the table, but still just one point above the drop zone!

Sorry that this iz just a brief report for now, but I have got to pay my respects at '11:00am bells' to 'The glorious dead' at my local war memorial!

Updated 'high noon bells' Munday
Spot the 1,300 Bournemoooth fans huddled 
in the corner of the top deck of The Leazes End

How the goals were scored:
7th minute: Yedlin sends a cross in from the right at the Leazes End and Rondon's subsequent shot iz saved by Begovic in the visitors goal---but the baall rebounds to wor number 9 and he fires the baall into the net to score hiz forst Premyaa Leegue goal for The Toon!

39th minute: After a 10 minute delay due to an twisted knee injury to Bournemoooth's Adam Smith, Kenedy sends in a pin point cross and Rondon's bullet-heeder gives their keeper ne chance, az we double wor lead!---az the crowd explodes!

45+ 6 minutes: 'The Cherry Pickers' reduce the deficit when Lerma heeds into the Gallowgate End net (Their nickname iz: The Cherries!) 

The 2nd half woz a bit nervy az wor visitors tried to find the equaliser, but some excellent saves from Dubravka in The Toon goal saved the day and then near the end, Rondon  missed a great chance to get hiz hat-trick when he woz clean through on goal, but hiz effort woz put behind by Begovic for a corner!
The ref gave a goal kick, but the linesman on The Milburn Stand side flagged to say that iz woz a corner! (how the ref couldn't see that iz a mystery az he woz just a few feet from the incident!?)

The linesman in question had seemingly given every decision before that to Bournemoooth, and one wag behind me commented that: "Hiz flag must only be able to gan one way!"

With 9 minutes left ex SMB striker Defoe came on and we feared the worst!----But we managed to hold oot and the ref finally blew hiz whistle @ '5:03pm bells' (due to the forst half injury to Smith) az we picked up 'back to back' wins for the forst time in 9 months!

Things are lookin UP at last!

Toon team: Dubravka, Yedlin, Schar, Fernandez, Dummett, Ritchie (Hayden 74), Diame, Ki, Kenedy (Clark 78), Perez, Rondon

Attendance: 49,266 (just 1,300 Cherry Pickers!)

IF Bournemoooth had sold their full allocation of 3,200 tickets the crowd would have been: 51,166

*Geordie Times factfile: Salamon Rondon became the 144th different player to score for us in The Premyaa Leegue!
We are nuw just 3 behind Sporz at the top of the pile, who have 147 different scorers

Footnote: Before the match we were in 'The Bodega' boozer on Westgate Road, where Cardiff were playin Brightin on the telly. 
A buglar played the last post and then there woz a minutes silence. The packed pub went deathly quiet az fans stopped wot they were doin' and observed the minutes silence!

That's the forst time I have ever seen this in a pub!

"LEST WE FORGET!"
6 NUFC players were killed in World War 1
The 4 ringed are Tom Goodwill, Dan Dunglinson, Owen McManus and Tom Cairns
Also killed were George Rivers and Richard McGough




Friday, 9 November 2018

SOOOTHAMPTON U23s v THE TOON U23s **** TOONEET

Posted '4:25pm bells' Friday 9th November 2018

"STAPLE DIET!"

Tooneet @ Sooothampton's Staplewood trainin' groond, wor U23s take on theirs in a FA Premyaa Resorve Leegue cup game @ '7 bells'
'The Geordie Times' wont be there, but yoo can bet your bottom dollar that a handful of 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' will be there! (If it woz on a 'proper groond' and not a trainin complex, then we would definitely have travelled doon to deepest Hampshire!)

We will of course let yoo know how we 'got on' ASAP

Meeenwhile wor U18s have been drawn away to Bolton U18s in the thord roond of the FA Youth Cup---to be played on or before 15th December! (We've been here before of course!)

Updated '9:48pm bells' in Eccles, Manchester (on truck run!)---(stationary!)

FT 1-1    Elias Sorensen saved the day when he scored with a well taken shot just 2mins from time after Marcus Barnes had given Sooothampton the lead after 18mins 
Attendance not known yet, but there woz at least one 'NUFC mad-sad groundhopper' present!

The game woz played in heavy rain (just like it iz in Eccles az I write this!)

"IT WOZ 50 YEARS AGO TODAY!" (Part 2)

Posted '11:20 am bells' Friday 9th November 2018


The Geordie Times 'Golden Jubilee' celebrations continue, when, on this day half a century ago aa paid mee forst ever visit to London to watch The Toon play The Arse at Highbury!
(Archive match report below this one)

(Ground 004, Arsenal Stadium, Highbury, London, Ing-er-land, Europe, The World!)

004 highbury arsenal


(GROUND NUMBER 4)

Date of First Visit: 9th NOVEMBER 1968
ARSENAL STADIUM, HIGHBURY, LONDON

ARSENAL 0

NEWCASTLE UNITED 0

(OLD) DIVISION ONE

ATTENDANCE 34,168 (2,000 Toon fans)




"IS HAROLD IN?"


Mee 'debut' visit tih the 'smoke' tih see the Toon play Arsenal, torned oot tih be a real 'eye opener'. For 'innocent'? school kid's like meesel and mee mate 'Billy' the thing that fascinated us as we travelled on the supporters bus through the streets of London was just how big the bloody place was.

Mile after mile of endless streets an' buildings, and even at six in the mornin' it was quite busy.
(Wi'd left Tyneside at midnight, as yih did in those days)


As this was wor forst time doon London to watch The Toon, we were taken tih see 'the sights' like 'The Hooses of Parliament', 'The Tower of London', and 'Big Ben'.


Next to the Hooses of Parliament there was an aad gadgie sellin' poppies from a staall as it was rememberance Sunday the followin' day. Aa got mee eye on a huge poppy at the back the size of a futbaall rosette and insisted that that!was the one aa wanted!

Aa gave him a threpny bit and he reluctantly pinned it to the lapel on mee 'nanny goat' an' aa felt as pleased as punch with mee new 'fashion accessory' as aa sauntered off doon the road! (aa say 'reluctantly', as aa think he wanted more than threepence for it!) (one pence in todays money!)


Aalso on the tour was a visit tih Downing Street, where aa was hopin' tih meet Harold Wilson, the then Prime Minister, for a bit 'crack' aboot futbaall. (he supported Huddersfield Town)

In the 1960's, yih could actually waalk reet up tih the front door of 'Number 10' (unlike nuw, where there are huged spiked gates at the bottom of the street tih bar the way, because of the threat of terrorism) (how times change!) 'Officer Dibble' was guardin' the front entrance, and aa asked him if ah could knock on the door and speak tih the Prime Minister.


"Is Harold in?", aa said in an optimistic voice, "a'v got some important business tih discuss with him aboot futbaall!",
---but, aall ah got was one of those,
'YOU'D BETTER P**S OFF BONNY LAD, OR I'LL KICK YOU UP THE F***** ARSE', looks!


---Aa thought it best not tih ask him again, for the fear of bein' hoyed into 'The Tower of London', so wih left very disappointed, (not knowin' what 'Harold' thought of the Toon's chances that day!) and headed for Islington, 'Norf Landon'!.


We arrived at Highbury a while later, and (as luck would have it!) the team bus pulled up ootside the main entrance just as wih got there.
The directors, one wearin' a monocle! (a member of the 'McKeag Clan', ah think?) got off forst, and with their 'noses in the air', they completely ignored the loyal fans who'd travelled doon tih London.


The players in contrast, (a'm glad tih say!) acknowledged the waitin' supporters and signed a few autographs before gannin in.


The uniformed usher on the door looked very regal (as did the stadium!) and as wih entered the East Stand paddock the grandeur of Highbury was there for aall tih see.


The two double decker 'mirror image' stands, with whitewashed balcony waalls on either side of the pitch, looked very impressive, and it was certainly a million miles better than anything wih had at St. James' Park (which still had open terracin' on two sides of the pitch!) To wor right was The Northbank End where the Arsenal 'choir' congregated underneath the roofed terraces and to wor left was the open Clock End which (of course!) had a huge clock the size of 'Big Ben' at the rear of the terracin'


Aalthough the match ended nowts each, it was far from a borin' game, with the Toon by far the better team, and for every save that McFaul in the Newcastle goal had tih mek, his counterpart Bob Wilson in the Arsenal goal had tih mek two.


However, 'The Mags' were very lucky not tih give a penalty away when 'Pop' Robson punched an Arsenal shot ower the bar, which the ref. and linesman did'nt see (much tih the annoyance of 'The Gunners' forwards!) who had tih settle for a corner.


Later on, things evened themselves oot, when 'Pop' evaded several tackles, in a run from one end of the pitch tih the other.

His shot, which was gannin in, was deflected tih Jackie Sinclair who fired a powerful drive into the net!---anly for the ref. tih disallow it for offside!. (looked o.k. tih me, like?)

This was an excellent performance from the 'Black 'n' Whites' in a game wih should iv won easily.
On the final whistle wih headed for the 'bright lights' of the 'West End' with wor 'guides', and in particular, we made for the seedy 'red light strip joints' of 'Soho' for some more 'sight seein'! ('Fenwick's window' in Northumberland Street was neva like this!)



(For 'innocent' 14 year old's like me and Billy, this was the REAL 'EYE OPENER'!)




©Fink ™(the mad-sad grundhpper!)

 

Thursday, 8 November 2018

THE TOON v BOURNEMOOOTH *** PREMYAA LEEGUE THIS SATURDAY

Posted '4:32pm bells' Thorsday 8th November 2018

"CHILD'S PLAY!"


Rafa haz said that NUFC fans consider the players az their 'children' and that offerin them encouragement, even when they make misstakz, iz the best way to achieve success this season!

Benitez insists that the majority of fans realise that unity woz crucial in helpin NUFC win promotion in the 2016-2017 campaign az well az bein an important factor in NUFCs 10th place finish last season!

He expects a similar positive atmosphere v Bournemoooth this Saturday az we had last weekend v Wotfaad, when we won for the forst time this season in 12 attempts!

Muto meenwhile iz unlikely to play, while Shelvey iz a doubt!  Lascelles however IZ available for selection in yet anothaa must win game!

Bournemoooth have sold 1,722 tickets for the game, which iz ower a thoosand more than both Brightin and Wotfaad sold in wor last 2 home games!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!

PS: A'm havin problems with mee laptop and aa have to de everything on mee mobile!---which isnt easy on a smaall screen!

Updated Friday---SORTED!

Tuesday, 6 November 2018

THE THORD OF A MILLION CLUB!

Posted '3:17pm bells' Tuesday 6th November 2018
"GEORDIE TIMES RULES OK!"
SOMEWHERE IN NEW YORK CITY!

Anothaa Geordie Times landmark woz passed today when we receeeved wor 333,334th pageview, meenin' that we have now passed the the thord of a million total!

The top 10 pageviews from countries aroond the world are az follows:

UK 159,989
USA 43,832
Ukraine 23,034
Jawmany 17,645
Israel 15,060
Rushaa 10,584
(Lost in) France 8,199
(Mee old) China 4,452
The Guinness Republic 3,802
Spain 2,382
The rest of the world totals from 149 countries and territories (plus Mars and beyond!) are az follows, 44,355

We thank each and everyone off yoo for loggin into this site

"Howay the lads!"


"Take me to your leader!
Whey aye maan!"





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