Wednesday, 28 August 2019

THE TOON v THE BASIL BRUSH BRIGADE OF LESTAA *** LEEGUE CUP 2nd ROOND

Posted '2:05pm bells' Wedinzday 28th August 2019
THE FOXES ARE COMIN' TO TOON!

After wor excellent and unexpected victory ower Sporz on Sunday, we face 'The Basil Brush Brigade' (The Foxes!) at SJP in a '7:45 bells' kick off tooneet in The Carabao Leegue Cup!

 Wor heed coach 'Broken Nose Bruce' haz said that he will field a very strong line up, but with injuries concerns, we will see just how strong wor line up iz come kick off time?

"THE SIX SICKIES!"
We hear that Lascelles (calf), Atsu (muscle), Joelinton (groin), Almiron (ankle) and Schar (knock)  are aall doubtful to play and that Saint-Maximum (hamstring) will be oot for a while!
Aalso, we here that sub goalie Darlow will replace Dubravka! (Who ISN'T injured!)

So much for 'the promise' of playin a full strength team to try and win a cup! (That's 6 players oot from the Sporz win aalready!)
5 of those 6 are expected to make a miraculous recovery and shud be available for wor Premyaa Leegue game at home to Wotfaad on Saturday!!!???
Lestaa,we hear,will play a full strength team includin' a certain PEREZ! (remember him?)

A sub 16,000 crowd woz predicted before the Sporz game, but the suprize victory in norf London could well add a few thoosand to the gate and we predict that the attendance will be aroond aboot the 19,000- 20,000 mark, despite havin hord that Lestaa have anly sold 750 tickets--- 

Prices DOUBLE today from £5 for sprogs and zimmerframeites and £10 for big kids TO £10 and £20! az NUFC have done in the past! (Crazy--if yoo ask us, az it puts off  'walk up' fans who might have come!---but now probably wont!)

A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear here sometime on Thorsday---but will we be 'in the hat' for the draw later tooneet!?



"DEAD AND BURYED!"


AFTER 134 YEARS BURY FCs TIME IZ UP!

One team who 'wont be in the hat' are Leegue One Bury FC, who have been hoyed oot of the EFL after they failed to provide the funds to carry on!
A guy called Steve Dale (who admitted that he had NEVER hord of them previously!) bought Bury for ONE POOND  last January and he re-mortgaged their groond to the tune of £1.5 million just after he bought them! 
They can't pay the mortgage repayments of course--and so their Gigg Lane home for 134 years (when they were founded) could be sold to a housin developer etc!
This shud send shockwaves aroond futbaall, az greedy speculators buy clubs they have nee interest in ('The Fat Controller' included!)

Bolton Wanabeez who are 142 years old, are in the same position, but have been given a 14 day stay of execution to find a buyer--or else they will be hoyed oot az well! (And they were in the Premyaa Leegue just 7 years ago!)

Its a good job that St. James' Park iz part of the Toon Moor and can NEVER be torned into a hoosin' estate by 'Yee naa who'!

PS: 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have been to Gigg Lane before!  The last time we played there woz for an NUFC resorve game against Moan U resorves in the 1990s




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