Friday 30 November 2012

294 underhill, barnet, london


(Ground number 294)

Date of First Visit: 27th November 2012

UNDERHILL, BARNET, LONDON

ARSENAL U18s  3

NEWCASTLE UNITED U18s  0

FA YOUTH CUP 3rd ROUND

Attendance: 500 estimated (includin’ quite a few Toon fans)

 

“AN UP HILL STRUGGLE @ UNDERHILL!”
'THE TOON' ATTACK 'THE TUBE TRAIN TERRACE END'!
(SPOT THE TUBE TRAIN!)


Three of us set of @ ’11:00 am bells’ in mee ‘canny tranny’ from ‘The Black Bull’ in the shadows of St James’ Park for this FA Youth Cup tie in norf Landan against ‘The Arse’ who play their resorve games @ Underhill, the home of Barnet FC

We arrived at ‘5:00 bells’ in good time for the ‘7 bells’ start and parked up in a side street beside the groond where the floodlights were blazin’ away and made wor way to the ‘Old Red Lion’ boozer, which was situated on the corner of the main road within easy hocklin distance of the groond!  

Of course there were a handful of ‘saddos’ there az well who had travelled doon from Tyneside by various modes of transport and I won’t name and shame them for fear of ridicule!

After a few ‘liquids’ in ‘The Lion’ (“ER!”--shandy for me, coz aa was drivin’!) we heeded for the tornstiles where the princely sum of three quid waz required to gain entry!

The forst thing yi notice when yi enter the groond iz the massive slope on the pitch from goal to goal and it’s ne wonder they want to move az the hotch potch of bus shelter stands make this one of the worst leegue groonds that a’v ever been te! (Barnet have been @ Underhill for 105 years and are due to move to a new groond at the end of this season!)
"SPOT THE SLOPE!"

The groond sits at the bottom of a hill (under-hill!) with tube trains arriving’ and departin’ from ‘New Barnet Tube Station’ every few minutes, which waz just a couple of minutes waalk, up the hill behind the ‘uphill’ goal.

The game kicked off and an eccentric old biddy with an Arsenal hat and flag, who waz sittin’ near the end of the main stand, started singin’ old futbaall songs by horself, at the top of hor voice!

It waz quite amusin’ at forst but after a while it started to get a bit irritatin’ az she ranted on!

The Toon had started off well az we kicked ‘doon the hill’ and forward Alex Gilliead shot into the side nettin’ in the fifth minute, but that’s az good az it got from wor point of view az ‘The Arse’ went on the offensive from this point and had several chances to take the lead az they kicked uphill towards (wait for it!) ‘The Tube Train Terrace End’!

The inevitable happened in the 22nd minute when Jeffrey drilled a shot past Woodman in the Toon goal. Their lead waz doubled just before the break when a fine dribble from Bellerin evaded wor defence and he slotted home.

“IT’S AALL ‘UP HILL’ FROM HERE!”

The second half waz ne better for us az we kicked up the hill and it waz anly on rare occasions that we did venture near ‘The Tube Train Terrace End’ goal az the clock counted doon the minutes!

The Arse kept the pressure up and by the mid point of the half we looked well beaten. It waz obvious at this point that we were gannin to lose the match and ‘Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer’ <(SH*T!---a’v named and shamed somebody!) waz cursin’ the fact that he’d booked on the midneet bus back from Victoria Coach Station instead of the train, az he would have had to leave before the end if ‘extra time’ waz needed  to catch the last train yem!

The final nail in wor ‘coffin’ came at ‘the death’ (excuse the pun!) when Akpom slotted home past Woodman to put ‘The Arse’ three-nil up and win the game!

It waz then a five hour drive back to Tyneside and we arrived back at qwaata to one in the mornin’ with 550 miles on the clock for the roond trip!

Next day it waz another road trip to Stoke to watch the forst team lose 2-1 and by the time we got back from this one, a total of nearleee a THOOSAND MILES had been clocked up in two days!

Who would be a Toon fan???

 

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