BAD BLUE BOYS 0 WHITLEY BAY WATCHERS 1 *** NORTHERN LEEGUE 2016-2017

Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 26th March 2017


To get mee Saturday 'fix' aa had to gan to Federation Park in Dunston for their game v Whitley Bay az NUFCs forst team wornt in action coz of the 2 week International break!



The clubhoose woz mee forst 'port o call' where several bottles of 'Dog' were consumed (2!) before kick off (Dog = Newcasil Brooon Ale!)


"HURRY-HURRY!-HURRY!"





INSIDE CLUBHOOSE ***FA VASE WINNERS MEMORABILIA FROM 2012

It woz a bright sunny day in Dunston az the game started, in front of a 200 plus crowd, of which aroond aboot 50 were Baywatchers fans!


'THE BAD BLUE BOYS' ARE IN AALL BLUE!

'Bay' took the lead halfway through the forst half aftaa the Bad Blue Boys keeper had made a great save, but unfortunately for him the baall rebounded to one of 'Bays' forwards and he 'wellied it' into the back of the net at 'The Tea-Hut End'

The Bay keeper then got sent off for bringin' a Dunston forward doon on the edge of the box and az he woz 'last man', the ref had ne option but to send him for an orly bath!
An outfield player then took hiz place (reluctantly!) az they had ne replacement keeper on the bench! 

The home side couldn't take advantage of this and the teams went in at half time with the score still 1-0 to the visitors!

The Whitley Baywatchers took to a defensive formation in the 2nd period and somehow managed to hang on for the victory despite their 10 men, to de the double ower The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston

PART OF THE HUGE CROWD!

(They'd won the home game 2-1 the othaa week)

It woz then back to the clubhoose for some more 'Dog' before heedin' for The Royal and The Tudor Rose alang the road, to finish off  'the afternoon session'! 
Attendance: 278

TEAM SHEET

 

BLANKETY BLANK X 9!

Posted '1:00pm bells' Saturday 25th March 2017


"I'M BACK AGAIN FOLKS!"

Havin' played 11 games in 6 weeks from the beginnin' of February, we then find worsels withoot a game for 2 weeks because of the International break!
It's total madness to play so many games in such a short period and then find worsels with nowt for 14 lang days! (Today iz the NINTH Saturday 'Blankety Blank' of the season--so far!)

Because we need wor 'Saturday fix' we are off on a very short jorney today to see 'The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston' play 'The Whitley Bay Watchers' in a Northern Leegue game @ Federation Park in Dunston---a good half a mile from the Metro Centre and 2 miles from SJP!

A match report from that game will appear here in good time and 'the clubhoose' at Dunston will be wor forst 'port o caall' for the 'liquid lubrications'! ("hic!")

It's the hottest day of the year so far and 'T shirt' weathaa, az the sun shines brightly ower the sacred River Tyne az we speak!

More to follow presentleeee!

THE BRUMMIE BLUE NOSES 0 THE TOON 0 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 20th March 2017


"MISS 'WHIPLASH' IZ ALIVE AND KICKING!"

After three and a half hours sleep after finishin' nightshift "ZZZZZzzzzz!!!!!" it woz 'up again' at '6am bells' to catch the '7:22 bells' train doon to Bormingham (via Doncaster)

We'd booked a hotel in 'Donny' az there woz a replacement bus service from York to Darlo on the way back--- and then back on a train to The Toon! (that's train-bus-train!) 
Tooo much 'hassle' so we decided to come back the next day instead and have a neet in downtown Doncaster (Donny)

We got off the train in Donny and dropped wor bags off at The St Leger Hotel which iz next to the racecourse and then grabbin' a pint in 'The Mallard' next to the station before jumpin' back on the train to New Street (Bormingham)



The next part of the jorney woz a bit chaotic to say the least az we had tickets from Donny to Sheffield--Sheffield to Derby---and then Derby to Bormingham---aall in different seats in the same carriage!
(This woz to save £50 instead of bookin' direct to wor destination!)

Because the train woz packed we had to vacate wor seats 3 times to let people who had booked them into them--and then hoy people oot, who were sittin' in wor new seats---aall in the space of an hour--which iz a 'new world record' for changin' seats on a train (4 times if yoo include Toon to Donny!)-------I hope yoo are followin' aall this?

ENTRANCE TO THE 'WELLY'

Anyway!--On wor arrival at New Street ('11 bells') we headed for wor fave haunt roond theeze parts--'The Welly' (for the 4th time this season!) which iz up a hill from the station

It woz then onward to The Bordsley Club which iz a 10 minute walk from St Andrews before heedin for the tornstiles!

ENTRANCE TO CLUBHOOSE

"EVERY CLOUD HAZ A SILVER LINING!"


1st HALF ACTION AZ THE TOON ATTACK 'WOR END' (we are in white)
The steward at the front iz supposed to be watchin' the crowd--NOT! the match!
 


It torned oot to be anothaa drab game and the main taalkin' point woz a disallowed goal in the forst half, scored by Matt Richie az he scrambled the baall into the back of the net directly in front of us!
"GOAL!"---and for a few seconds it woz---UNTIL!!!---the linesman on the far side belatedly raised hiz flag for 'offside' and the goal waz chalked off!
From where we were at the front (see above pic) it looked a porfectleee good goal?

We had a few chances after this 'to win it' but the Brummie goalie woz on form to deny us and the game ended goal-less!
ONE point anly--BUT! az wor main rivals 'uddersfield had lost 4-0 at Bristol the neet before and Brighton lost 2-0 at Leeedz in the live teatime game after wor match, we'd actually GAINED groond on both of them!

2nd HALF ACTION AT THE FAR END
(A'd moved forthaa back to get a better view!)

After the match we heeded back to Donny for the evenin' 'session' where several 'liquid lubrications' were consumed--but not one of them in 'The Staff of Life'--a boozer tucked away in a side street in the toon centre!
We entered the bar where six people were sittin' on stools aroond the bar coontaa with the manageress behind the bar taalkin' aboot somebody gettin' 'a good spankin'!!!!


'THE STAFF OF LIFE! (WITH the curtains open!)


The manageress looked az us az though we'd just waalked into hor hoose uninvited and said abruptly, "We're CLOSED!"
"It's anly haff past NINE!", we protested, but she woz havin' none of it and asked us to leave!

We did and took wor custom to a boozer next door caalled The Doncaster Brewery and telt the manageress there wot had just happened!
"Oh!" she said, "It's a very strange set up in there!"--but didn't elaborate, so we left it at that! (We'd renamed hor 'Miss Whiplash' by this time!)

To get to the 'tool shed' in this bar yoo had to waalk past several vats of beer fermentin' in the next room and the smell of hops sent yoo 'high az a kite' az yoo waalked past!--a strange set up indeed!

THE 'SCENIC ROUTE' TO 'THE TOOL SHED'!

On leavin' the bar at 'chuckin oot time', we noticed that 'The Staff of Life' curtains had been drawn!!!---wot woz gannin' on inside we thought???---(Your guess iz az good az mine!)

After a 'nose-bag', it woz back to the hotel for a few hours kip "ZZZZzzzz!!!!" before catchin' the '9:30 bells' train back to The Toon the next mornin', wonderin' just wot HAD happened 'the neet before' in 'yoo naa where'????---THE MIND BOGGLES!!!!

Toon team: Darlow, Anita, Hanley, Lascelles, Dummett, Richie, Diame, Colback, Gouffran (Atsu 82), Murphy (Gayle 63), Perez, (Shelvey 78)

Attendance: 19,796 (3,200 Toon fans)

* Some othaa boozers visited in Donny

THE SALUTATION

 

BRUMMIE BLUE NOSES v THE TOON **** THIS AFTERNOOON!

Posted '6:15am bells' Saturday 18th March 2017

We woz here in the FA Cup, just 2 months ago!

We face a 'pressure cooker' game later today when we heed for Bormingham once again (wor 4th visit ti the 2nd city this season!)
Brum in the FA Cup, Villa and Wolves)

'uddersfield's 4-0 defeat last neet at The Big Bristols meeenz that if? we can win then we will gan NINE points clear of them again!

Az per usual we will be heedin' for 'The Welly' near New Street train station for the pre match gargels and then onward to St Andrews!

Match report to follow on MUNDAY az aa divvint get back til Sunday afternoon!
"Must dash!---got a train to catch!!!"

" I DONT LIKE MUNDAY'S!"

Posted '12:53pm bells' Thorsday 16th March 2017

Yet anothaa game haz been moved for live telly!---This time it's Preston 'Dead End' who must now travel to SJP on Munday 24th April
(I bet their fans are happy aboot that!?) (NOT!)

Neetha a'm aa!--az aa will have to take yet anothaa days holiday to gan to the match az aa work nightshift!
That'll be the TENTH days holiday a'll a'v had to take so far this year!--and we still haven't had the Cardiff away game conformed yet!
"Pleeeeeze!--not a Munday or Friday neet!"

THIS WEEK WILL DEFINE WOR SEASON!

Posted '1:37pm bells' Tuesday 14th March 2017

Havin' had a hectic month with 3 games a week, we now find worsels with just ONE game between now and April Fools Day!
(Because of Internationals)

That game iz at 'The Blue Noses of Bormingham' on Saturday @ '3 bells', where we desperately need a win and 3 more precious points!

Aall eyes (and ears!) on Friday neet will be on Bristol, where 'uddersfield play The Big Bristols!
Shud they win (god forbid!) then they will be just THREE points behind us and 'Ne Where Near' Brighton before we play! (a fortneet ago they were ELEVEN points behind us!)

With Leeedz and 'The Hillsborough Hillbillies' (Sheff Wed) slippin' up, it looks like a 3 horse race for the 2 automatic promotion spots!
(Brighton are at Leeedz in an evenin' kick off on Saturday!)

The norves are janglin' aalready in anticipation/trepidation! of the weekends games, az the final countdown begins!

'FUNKY GIBBINS' BEER CLIPS

Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 13th March 2017

Toon fan 'Funky Gibbins' collects beer clips from real ale pumps and 'The Geordie Times' haz given him hiz own page to display them! (see above and 'click') 

"GEORDIE TIMES' "NEWSFLASH!"

Posted '11:45am bells' Munday 13th March 2017

"I WOULD HAVE WON DERBY THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE IF THEY'D KEPT ME!"

News reaches 'The Geordie Times' via carrier pigeon that 'The Wally With The Brolly' haz been sacked by Darbee Coonty forthwith!

It couldn't happen to a nicer failure!

THE TOON 1 FUL'IM 3 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted '9:55am bells' Sunday 12th March 2017


"NOT SO SWEET SIXTEEN!!"

Wor worst home performance of the season happened yesterday when we 'imploded' against a very good Ful'im side who went 'for us' from the word 'go'!

Just why we cant go for 'the jugular' straight away in home games iz beyond us az we sit back and hope for a break!

This hasn't worked in previous games and it didn't here, az within 15 minutes we were 1-0 doon when Cairney hit an unstoppable shot past Darlow at The Leazes End!

It woz still the same score at the break but Ful'im had othaa chances to increase their lead!
WE could have ne excuses az a vitually full strength team woz on the field of play, but just couldn't get oot of 'forst gear'?

The away side scored 2 forthaa goals in the 2nd period when SIXTEEN year old Ryan Sessegnon netted for them! (totally unmarked for 1 of the goals)
3-0 doon and the game woz lost!!!!

Sub Daryl Murphy scored a consolation goal to lessen the deficit and then there woz a penalty miss for wor visitors in stoppage time!

Just why we cant play in front of 50,000 home fans (Ful'im had 1,350 in the 51,903 crowd) iz beyond us????

This result meeenz that we have lost FIVE home games this season and taken just ONE solitary point from the last 2 home games!
The hard work of victories at both Brighton and 'uddersfield and a draw at Readin' 'are lost' on wor home form?

Brighton are now level with us on 77 points and have 'dented' wor once unassailable goal difference with their 3-0 win ower Darbee on Friday (from +11 to + 6 now!) and 'uddersfield are just SIX points behind with 71 points followin' their 1-0 win at Brentfaad! (AND they have a game in hand v Bortin Albion at home!)


We now have 9 'cup finals' to gan to secure wor top flight retorn----it's 'squeaky bum time'---folks!

Toon team: Darlow, Anita, Lascelles, Clark (Gamez 64), Dummett, Richie, Shelvey, Colback, Atsu, Diame (Murphy 61), Gayle (Gouffran 74)
*   

THE TOON v THE 'JACKSONLESS JIVERS' OF FUL'IM *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

Posted '1:17pm bells' Friday 10th March 2017

THE ROOF OF SJP CAN JUST BE SEEN FROM THE
GREY'S MONUMENT AREA, IN THE CITY CENTRE
(Brighton & Reading, pleeeze note, 'CITY CENTRE!')

A home game at last!---after wor marathon treks(sss) ower the last week, we finally play a game at HQ and a TWO mile bus jorney to SJP (for me at least!)---in complete contrast to the 700/220/650/ miles train and bus jorneys we have endured in 7 days! (and with groonds miles away from city centres!--Brighton 6 & Reading 4!)

There are now just 10 games left in 'the marathon 46 game season (not includin' cup ties!) and the sooner we are back in 'The Premyaa'--the better! (lets hope and pray it's NEXT season!)

The Jacksonless Jivers (so caalled because there used to be a Michael Jackson statue ootside Craven Cottage!) are on the fringes of the play-offs and it wont be an easy game--that's for sure!

Virtually aall tickets are sold and we understand that wor visitors have sold just 1,350 tickets (with extra tickets for wor fans in the 'away' area)

A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear on Sunday
"Watch this space!"