JOYOUS NEWS FOR THE NUFC GROUNDHOPPERS! **** IF ?

Posted '12:43pm bells' Tuesday 10th January 2017

 

"WILL WE BE GETTIN' THE GRAVY TRAIN TO OXFAAD?"

 

"SOMEWHERE IN OXFAAD!"

The FA Cup 4th roond draw haz paired us with 'The Oxo Gravy Mob' IF we can beat Bormingham in the 3rd roond replay a week tomorrow!
The game will be played at their Kassam Stadium on one of  fower days on the last weekend of this month--dependin' on wot the telly picks for live coverage <(yoo can bet they will pick 'us'!)

"BUT WILL WE BE ON IT!?"

Oxfaad were one of anly a handful of teams we have nevaa been te, although we have visited their old Manor Groond in 'Cookoo Lane' before!
(Wor last 2 results there were 4-2 and 5-2 DEFEATS!)

Meeenwhile wor youth team are through to the next roond of the Youth Cup aftaa beatin' Swanzee 3-1 at SJP last neet in front of 1,307---Lewis McNall and Thomas Allen (2) sealin' the win to give us a possible away tie against the SMBs at the SOS

BORMINGHAM BLUE NOSES 1 THE TOON 1 *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND

Posted: '12:15pm bells' Sunday 8th January 2017
Updated: '10:55am bells' Munday

"THE ROMANCE OF THE FA CUP?"

"THEY'RE HERE!--THEY'RE THERE! -- THERE EVERY F***** WHERE!---
EMPTY SEATS!--EMPTY  STANDS!"

The day started off at 'The Central' az usual at '6:55 am bells' and soon we were in New Street (Bormingham station) in time for the forst 'gargels' of the day in 'The Welly' up the hill from the station which iz wor usual 'haunt' when we visit these parts!

 
It waz then onward to the Bordsley Labour Club near the groond for the final 'liquid lubrications' before the kick off!

And did we need those drinks az we put in yet anothaa aaful performance against a very average Bormingham side!

We started off well though and took the lead in the 5th minute when Daryl Murphy toe poked home from a corner kick to send the 4,600 plus Toon fans packed behind that goal into wild celebrations!  Worryingly, Mitrovic waz injured in the penalty box az the goal waz scored and had to be stretched off with a bad gash in hiz leg!

Like aa say the Toon end waz packed to the rafters but the same couldn't be said for the rest of the groond and the Main Stand waz completely empty apart from those in the directors box higher up!
The far end, where the Brummie diehards (allegedleee!) gan, waz nearly empty az well and yoo could even make oot the letters in the seats which read 'THE BLUES'

We couldn't add to wor lead az we huffed and puffed with barely a pass gannin to one of wor players az we struggled to even get ower the halfway line!
And then of course the home side equalised nearly on half time when wor defence failed to to get back in formation and Grounds fired home!

The 2nd half waz dire and aa nearly fell asleep!----We did have chances to win it---but so did Bormingham late on!
A replay a week on Wednesday iz now needed and wor game v Brentford next Munday haz been cancelled and will now be played NEXT Saturday instead!
Brighton won their FA Cup tie and so wor scheduled game against them at their place on 4th roond day will now be played, mid week (presumably!) at some point!

Toon team: Sels, Yedlin, Lascelles, Hanley, Haidera (Richie 69), Anita, Colback, Tiote (Hayden 65), Lazaar, Murphy, Mitrovic (Gouffran 10)

Attendance: 13, 171 (4,671 Toon fans---ower a thord of the crowd!) If we weren't there the 'crowd' would have numbered 8,500 exatleee!


"WE WOZ THERE!"

*The post match gargels took place here!----in 'Donny'

'NUFC GEORDIE TIMES' ARCHIVE MATCH REPORTS

Posted '2:10pm bells' Friday 6th January 2017

I am busy (tryin'!) to transfor mee old archive match reports from 'geordietimes.com' which 'crashed' in November! (through no fault of my own!)

Az there were ower 100 archive reports on that site, it will take quite some time to de it!
It's a 'bit of a palaver' az I have to save the old stuff to 'draft' and then to a 'text document' and then to a 'word document' before puttin' it online.
Pictures need to be transfored individually az well --so pleeeze be patient and aall the 'old stuff' will be put on 'pages' az opposed to 'posts' and these can be foond in the right hand column.

(Recent match reports will be on 'posts')

The latest one a'v transfored to 'pages' iz from 'Ground number 001, St James Park in 2014, when we played Liverpool

It's a classic!---click onto 001 st james park (revisited--liverpool 2014)

BRAADFAAD U23s 0 THE TOON U23s 6

Posted 'high noon bells' Friday 6th January 2017

BRAADFAAD'S TRAININ' GROOND (pic sent by Dave from York)

On Wednesday afternoon wor U23s played Braafaads equivalent on their trainin' groond next to Appleby Bridge train station

We slaughtered them 6-0 with wor goals comin' from Heardman (3), Charman, and El Mahanni (2)

Instead of gettin' the train to Appleby Bridge 'Alex of St George' decided to waalk alang a canal bank from Leeds station to the game, some NINE MILES away (he gets FREE train travel az well!?)

Now yoo know just why we are caalled 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers'!
The attendance waz 43 plus 2 dogs! <NOT includin' me az aa had to gan to graft!

BLACKBORN 'VENKY CHICKEN' ROVAAZ 1 THE TOON 0 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 3rd January 2017

"GOAL!"---OH NO IT IZNT! (GAYLE WAZ OFFSIDE!)

"ROUGH SEAS AHEED!"

HMS NEWCASTLE!

Anybody who thought that it would be 'plain sailin' in wor quest for automatic promotion back to the Premyaa Leegue had better 'fink again'!
A game we should have easily won against a team in the relegation places, waz lost with a stupid tackle by Colback on the edge of the Rovaaz box late on---which the home side tucked away past the 'waall'? and Karl Darlow, into wor goal!

THE TOON (in black and gold) KICK OFF

A bar strike in the forst half (by Diame), numerous shots (many off target!) and TWO disallowed goals for us (1 offside, 1 'alleged handbaall'--Gayle and Clark)) in the 2nd period, summed up wor day az the near 7,000 travellin' fans suffered a new years hangower!---(for the 2nd time in 2 days!)

View from row 6 top tier Darwin End

The reality iz that we MUST strengthen wor squad in the transfor window or else we can say "goodbye" to promotion back to the big time---especially az AALL wor main rivals won to leapfrog and close the gap on us--with games in hand!

Perez haz lost the will---Colback iznt good enough (wot WAZ he thinkin' with that ridiculous tackle?) and Hayden iz like 'a bridge over troubled waters' (Haydon Bridge iz a village that straddles the River South Tyne in rural Northumberland---GET IT?) 

NOT such a happy new year after aall!
Toon team: Darlow, Anita (Murphy 87), Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Richie, Hayden, Colback (Perez 76), Gouffran (Atsu 85), Diame, Gayle

Attendance: 18, 524 (6,943 Toon fans) This waz Rovaaz biggest crowd of the season by nearly 6,000

"WE WOZ THERE!"

*The pre match 'liquid lubrications' took place here!


THE BLACKBORN FANS LOOK ON AZ
TOON FAN 'ADAM (without) AUNT' <(he NEVA brings hiz aunty!)
TRIES TO SLEEP OFF HIZ NEW YEAR HANGOWER!
"ZZZZzzzzzzzz!!!!"
(There waz anothaa 'hangower' to come at '3 bells'!)

"drink! drink! wherever yoo may be!"
 

"HAPPY NEW YEAR TO AALL WOR NEW REEDERS!"

Posted 'midneet bells' New Years Day 2017 

The last 2 months have been calamitous az far az 'The Geordie Times' iz concerned, az wor original website went doon on 4th November, az we were unable (despite many many attempts!) to renew the old domain name by 30th October (geordietimes.com)

This iz why the new site waz started az we were eventually telt by 'Go Daddy' the domain provider that 'AYE' we could renew it (after the deadline had passed!)--BUT that they wanted $95 (£77!) to do so instead of the $10 it would have been had they let us renew it in the forst place! (before the deadline!)
We declined their ridiculous offer and told them to drop in and see us sometime---(addin' that we live in the River Tyne!) and went to 'blogspot' instead---which iz FREE!

Anyway!-- so we 'launched' the new site: www.nufcgeordietimes.blogspot.com  to carry on! (a bit of a mouthful, we admit!)
Unfortunately, because the old site went doon, reeeders thought it must be finished for good and we have lost three qwaataaz of wor regulars because of this!
The old site got approx. 4,000 hits per month, whereaz the new one iz just above the 900 pageviews per month az we speak!

The pageview total for 'geordietimes.com' waz 241,856 before it went doon!
We have decided to add the 2 together (after aall it iz STILL the SAME site but with a different domain name!) and the qwaata of a million 'hits' shud be achieved sometime in the new year
241,856 + 1,717 = 243,663 az we speeek!

Downloadin' the old archive stuff from the old site haz been quite a 'mental nightmare brain-teezer' and we are workin' feverously to do it! (az we anly have the equivalent of 'half a sheeps brain' between us, it might take quite a while!)

For example, we have to save the old archive stuff to 'draft'--then save it to a 'text document'--then we have to save it to a 'word document', before deleatin' loads of rubbish (meaningless words, arrows etc!)  Even then we cant move pictures ower and must do it individually, which teks ages! 

"PLEEEZE! tell everyone yoo know" aboot the new web address and have a very happy new year and hope (against hope!) that we are back in' the big time' come next August!

Cheers!
Fink (the mad-sad groundhopper) (323 & coontin'!)

THE TOON 3 THE FRIAR TUCK MOB 1 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted '1:33pm bells' New Years Eve 2016

NUFC GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUUSIVE!
MATT RICHIE'S FREE KICK GOAL!
(View from row 2 Milburn Stand balcony)

"REVENGE IZ SWEET!---THE FOG IZ A TREAT"

AMEX STADIUM--NE WHERE NEAR BRIGHTON!

Whereaz Boxin' Day torned oot to be 'disaster day' with wor defeat, Brighton's win to gan above us---and aall the othaa teams gainin' points on us, yesterday waz a complete reversal az we beat 10 men Forest at SJP!

The 'garglin' session started in 'The Bodega' on Westgate Road where we were informed off 'Sky Sports' that Brighton's game v Cardiff had been caalled off due to thick fog on the south coast!---Thiz of course meant that if we beat 'The Friar Tuck Mob' we would gan back to the top of the tree for the new year---and there would be nothin' that Chris Hughton's side could de aboot it! (the Brighton manager)

We started off attackin' The Leazes goal and within 3 minutes we were in front when Matt Richie hit a 25 yard free kick which deflected off the Forest waall and into the net to send the crowd wild! (see Geordie Times top pic!)

However!---we didn't take advantage and let 'The Friar Tuck Mob' back in when a defensive error let in Dumitru to level things on the half hour mark, az aa sat with 'mee heed in mee hands' fearin' the worst --again! (HT 1-1)

The tornin' point of the game came on the hour mark when a double bookin' for Forest captain Mills meant that they were doon to 10 men and revenge for wor double sendings off at their place at the beginnin' on the month! (to see match report from that game, scroll doon page!)

2nd HALF ACTION AT THE GALLOWGATE END

2 minutes later and we were back in front when super striker Dwight Gayle hit a baall into the net from a very tight angle at 'The Gallowgate End'!---JUSTICE!

And then the killer blow when Gayle again scored --with hiz chest this time!----to claim hiz 19th goal in 19 starts this season!

At the end of the game somemore good news!---we hord that 3rd placed Reading's game had been abandoned at half time due to the foggy south, meanin' that we stayed 9 points clear of them---and of course leapfrogged Brighton to retain the top spot!---

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Toon team: Darlow, Yedlin, Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Richie (Lazaar 83), Hayden, Colback (Diame67), Atsu, Perez, Gayle (Mitrovic 88)

Attendance: 52,228 (again, the highest of the season by 49 from Boxin' Day!) 2,300 Forest---they couldn't sell their full allocation of 3,200 and had the norve to chant "Sing in the library!"

Some of the Forest fans who bothered to torn up!--
Spotted here in Leazes Park before the game!
From left to right: Maid Marion, Robin Hood and Friar Tuck!

*PS: Update: 2:25pm bells----some more great news---- 'uddersfield could anly draa with 'The Venky Chicken Rovers' and the gap between 'us and 3rd iz still 9 points! 

THE TOON 0 THE WEDNESDAYITES 1 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted '3:11pm bells' Tuesday 27th December 2016

"OH NO!---MORE TURKEY!?"

Like millions of others aa had turkey at home on Xmas day for mee din dins and the last thing I expected in this Boxin' Day encoontaa with The Owls of Sheffield waz anothaa 'turkey', but that's exactly wot we got in the the shape of 'a man in black' in the centre of the pitch caalled  Paul Tierney who made wrong decision after wrong decision by NOT sendin' off Wednesday players for hatchet jobs---bookin' them instead--- and missin' major 'calls'.

Of course we didn't help worsels  eethaa by puttin' in anothaa Boxin' Day horror show (wor 9th defeat in the last 12 on this day!) az wor visitors took advantage of poor play by us az we froze in the stands!

They went for us from 'the off' az they attacked The Leazes End where their 3,100 fans were housed high up in 'level 7'

Dwight Gayle had hit the bar orly on at the other end and Cieran Clark missed with 2 heeders.
Karl Darlow waz kept bust in wor goal with some fine saves and to be honest we were happy to gan into the half time interval still on level torms!

Ootstandin' saves from Darlow kept us in it in the orly part of the 2nd period but the inevitable happened, when, after anothaa brilliant save from 'the man in green', Wednesday scored with a scrambled heeder from Loovens at The Gallowgate End!

To waste time their players then procceded to 'con the turkey' by feignin' injury to make him stop the game when we were in 'full flow'!
Wasted free kicks (by Gayle) and corners (by Richie) didn't help eethaa and the clock waz run doon, with 6 minutes added due to the visitors 'antics'!---The extra time did us ne good though and we suffered wor FOURTH home defeat of the season in front of wor biggest crowd so far (34 higher than wor game v Bormingham)

Roll on Friday neet when we take on 'The Tricky Trees' of Nottingham----lets hope we've seen the last of the turkeeez!!!

Toon team: Darlow, Anita, Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Richie, Hayden, Colback (Mitrovic 80), Gouffran (Perez 62), Diame (Atsu68), Gayle

Attendance: 52, 179 (3,100 Wednesdayites)
Highest crowd outside the top flight this season

"WHO'S THE B*STARD IN TH BLACK?"

*

 

       

MERRY XMAS FROM THE NUFC GEORDIE TIMES!

"AALL THE BEST FROM TYNESIDE!"
"WE WISH YOO A MERRY XMAS!"

323 roundwood pavilion rotherham u23s

Ground number 323

Date of first visit: 20^thDecember 2016

Roundwood Pavilion, Parkgate, Rotherham

 

Rotherham United U23s  2

Newcastle United U23s  2 (Smith, Roberts)

 

Central League Cup, group stage

Attendance: 250 (estimated) 6 NUFC saddos  (plus 7 or 8 watchin’ ower a back garden fence despite the fact that it waz FREE admission! < Wot plonkers!)

 

“FREYA’S NATIVITY PLAY—OR!---FREEZE AZ NEWCASTLE PLAY !”

 

FREYA IZ THE 3rd COW ON THE RIGHT!

A week before this game wor lass telt me that it waz 3 year old granddaughter Freya’s nativity play at nursery school, which started exactly the same time and day az this game at 1:00 bells in the afternoon! (Mee other grandson Zac’s nativity play waz at 3 on the same day az well!)

It waz a hard choice but mee head ruled mee heart and I chose to freeze to death in deepest Yorkshire despite catchin’ a heavy cold the day before the game!
(Wor lass said that she would video both of them on hor mobile and show me when I got back!)

My logic? waz that I would probably never get the chance to gan to Roundwood Pavilion again, but I could aalways make a special effort next year to see both of their nativity plays!

 

‘Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer’ picked me up in hiz ‘jam jar’ and ‘off we set’ to sooth Yorkshire with a ‘hand written note’ of how to get there! (Wot’s a sat-nav, like?)

It waz a bit of a complicated place to get te az there were right hand turns at pubs, left hand turns at pubs and then left at a canal, etc!---Somehow we managed to find the groond withoot askin’ anybody and parked up in between a golf course and the futbaall groond! (there were signposts for the golf course but NOT the groond?)

Az we parked up some youthful Rotherham players in club tracksuits ambled doon the car park, jumped into cars and drove away?---az there waz ne sign of the NUFC team bus (just an hour before kick off) we started to wonder if we’d come to the reet place?---OR!—if they’d switched the game to Rotherham’s main groond instead?  (A groond we’d visited just 2 months previously!)

 

Panic attack!---we waalked up the car park where a sign conformed that this waz indeed Rotherham’s trainin’ groond!  Roundwood Pavilion waz at the top of the rise and we nervously asked a club official if indeed the game waz takin’ place here! “YES!” he said, much to wor relief----And then the next very important question---“Iz the clubhouse open?”--- again an affirmative answer waz given az the team bus finally torned up!----- so! (az yi de!) in we went for some much needed liquid lubrication!

The clubhoose soon filled up---NOT with futbaall fans I may add, but with golfers from the course next door!

One fan (futbaall I fink?) asked if Rafa Benitez waz here! “ I wouldn’t have thought so az nebody in this team haz a hope in hell of breakin’ into the forst team at the mo!” I told him---addin’ that “Peter Beardsley waz here though!”---(he didn’t look impressed!)

 

It waz soon time to heed for the terraces of the Parkgate FC groond where the match waz takin’ place---apparently Rotherham rent the groond from them for 2^nd team and junior games!

The usual predicable saddos were there includin’ Dave from York, Alex of St George, Glennn from Ashington and Biffa the Beer <(this isn’t a spellin’ missteak az he likes a pint or 10!)

 

The game kicked off in freezin’ conditions and suprizingly there waz a much bigger ‘crowd’ than wot I expected (250 to the 100 expected!)

1st HALF ACTION (SPOT BEARDO?)

Just like the conditions we ‘froze’ from the ‘off’ and it didn’t look good---However we DID take the lead in the 14^th minute when Liam Smith fired home after a pass from Liam Gibson

However!---it took the home side just 3 minutes to level things and the scores were level at half time



SPOT THE PRIVIT HEDGE?

Nebody seemed to know that if we finished 2^nd in the group (most likely) if we would qualify for the next stage—such iz the chaotic nature of the competition!

Anyway the 2^nd half started off just like the forst, az pass after pass went astray and in the 68^thminute we were punished for this when Rotherham took the lead when Bailey nodded in a glancin’ heeder!

Aaall looked lost but Callum Roberts saved the day for us 10 mins later with a shot from the edge of the box at The Clubhoose End!

THE CLUBHOOSE (in the far corner) END!

Like aa say—az there iz ne format for qualification to the next roond we haven’t got a clue if we will qualify!?---OR NOT!?---wot a farce!

"WE WAZ THERE!"---A CRUMPLED TEAM SHEET!

 

PS: This waz in fact ‘The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’ 4^th Rotherham home groond that we’ve seen The Toon play on!---the others bein’ Millmoor, Don Valley Stadium and New York Stadium

Aalso it waz the 2^ndnew groond in a row to see the same home team (New York Stadium waz groond 322!) probably the one and anly time this will ever happen!

 

PPS: I paid the price of standin’ in the freezin’ conditions and still wasn’t reet by Xmas weekend!

Sorves me right yoo might say!?