Saturday 14 July 2012

287 gellert stadium chemnitz germany

(Ground number 287)

Date of First Visit: (Friday!) 13th July 2012

Gellert Stadium, Chemnitz, east Germany


Chemnitzer  1 (Anton ‘FINK’!)

Newcastle United  0


Friendly fixture

Attendance: 6,700 (estimated 200 Toon fans)



Because we booked this one so late (two days before departure) we ended up flyin’ from Glasgow to Berlin az aall the flights from ‘Toon Airport’ to Prague (the nearest airport to Chemnitz) were full!

It meant a two and a half hour drive up to Jockoland in the orly hours and ‘Big Al’ (NOT the sheet metal workers son!) took hiz jamjar which we parked in the lang stay carpark at the airport for the rip-off sum of £35 for 3 days!

The flight waz on time and we arrived in Berlin some two hours later.

A half hour ride later on the train to central Berlin meant that we had a little time for a few gargles before catchin’ anotha train to Dresden some two hours more doon the line.

The problem waz!—we couldn’t find any drinkin dens aroond the station area and in any case it waz p*ssin doon with rain!  It meant a desperate sorch aroond the huge station for at least somewhere where they had ‘hootch’!

Eventually we foond a food outlet which selt bottles of Jawman beer and so we settled doon for a couple before wor next leg of the jorney.

Wor peace waz shattered when a text message from ‘Mal the Skoool Teacher who telt us from back home that the clubs official site had just annoonced another game in Hungary for the followin’ weekend!

Anyway!---it waz time to get the choo choo train to Dresden and off we set off for southern Jawmany.

On arrival we were greeted by torrential rain, but ‘Big Al’ reckoned the hotel wasn’t too far awy and he had a Google map to find it.

After waalkin’ aimlessly aroond in circles for half an hour getting’ a complete drenchin’ we eventually foond wor digs on the side of a duel carriageway and we dumped wor bags and dried worsels off before venturin’ oot into the downpour once again! (for some much needed ‘gargel’ yoo understand!)

‘The Caped Crusader’ had torned up by this time (He’d been there since the day before!) and we heeded for the delights of Dresden city centre which had several buildins of architectural interest (if yih interested in that kind of thing!) but NOT many ‘drinkin dens’ that we could find!

We DID find some and after dodgin’ the rain showers we heeded back to the hotel for some much needed ‘dryin off’!


Next day it waz off to Dresden station for the one hour train ride to Chemnitz, but az we had loads of time to kill, we ended up watchin’ a toy train gan roond a model village on a glass domed table in the station concourse, before we heeded there, az there waz nowt open for some ‘tonsil ticklin’!  

We were that bored in fact, that we even noticed that the bald gadgie made of plastic on the roof of a model hoose on the table, waz layin’ some roof tiles! (half an hour later and he he waz still in the same position!) (see main photo!)



A healthy lookin’ crowd, estimated by us at aroond the six thousand mark were boosted by aboot another 150 Toon fans in the visitors section opposite us and another 50 or so in the main stand includin’ many of the ‘NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’

There’d been heavy rain since we’d got there but it had faired up an hour before the kick off.

Things didn’t start off well and Chemnitzer’s centre forward who waz called ‘FINK’! (believe it or not!?) did the ‘unthinkable’ and scored against us in the 12th minute when he rifled in a fine effort past Elliot in The Toon goal! (H-E-L-P-!)

Glennn from Ashington, who waz sittin’ next to me, said in a raised voice: “SHAME ON YOU!” az he shook hiz head in disgust!---BUT!---“I WAZ NOT GUILY M’LORD!” az I was sittin’ in ‘row 2’ of the main stand---MILES! From the action! (so divvint blame ME!----blame mee ‘namesake’!)

New signin’ Romain Amalfitano made hiz debut for The Toon who sported a slightly different black ‘n’ white kit from last season and wor otha debutant Geal Bigirimana<(why can’t they have simple names to spell like ‘Jow Blogggz’?) came on az a sub at the mid point of the 2nd half.

Anyway!---it waz a very forgettable game (apart from ‘yee naa wot’!) and despite SIX 2nd half substitutions, includin’ new boy ‘Bigi’ <(az he had now been renamed!), Shola Ameobi and Demba Ba, we couldn’t find a way through the Thord Division Jawman sides defence and we wandered off after the final whistle, havin’ lost to a ‘FINK’ goal,and wonderin’ just why we  bothered!? (Aa’ll NEVA live it doon!)<(they won’t let me forget who scored the winnin goal!---will they?)


Aa was then ‘bombarded’ by HATE text messages (whey!---a couple, anyway!) by irate Toon fans back home, demandin’ explanations! (HELP!)


It’s not ‘Friday the 13th’!---IZ IT!???

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