"WHERE HE BELONGS!"

 Posted 'high noon bells' Wedinzday 18th May 2022

"STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN!"

At last, Alan Shearer's statue haz been moved from the old demolished toilet block on Barrack Road onto NUFC land!

Oot of spite, wor previous odious owner 'The Fat Controller' refused to have the statue on club land az he'd fell oot with wor record goalscorer!

He'd aalso changed the name of 'Shearer's Bar' underneath 'The Gallowgate End' to 'NINE' to get hiz own back on Shearer, who had criticized him!

Wor new owners have listened to the fans and changed the bar name back to 'Shearer's----and yesterday moved the statue to the stairway to The Gallowgate End', opposite the Bobby Robson statue!----         (The stairway to heaven!) 

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THE TOON 2 THE ARSE 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon 🔔bells' Tuesday 17th May 2022

A BLUE STAR PERFORMANCE!

Eddie Howe's forst game in the dugoot ended in a 2-0 defeat at Arsenal in November when NUFC were rock bottom of The Premyaa Leegue with nee wins at aall!

The Arse fans were quick to condemn and mock us then,  with chants of: "All that money and you're going down!"

Fast forward 6 months and we are 12th in the table after beatin Arsenal 2-0 at SJP for wor 12th win of the season in front of a fanatical flag wavin crowd, with their 3,000 followers in level 7 of The Leazes End, left speechless this time! (With Toon fans retornin' the mockin at The Emirates Stadium,  with chants of: "Champions Leegue!--yi havin a laff!" 😃 (Thier arch rivals Sporz are now odds on to qualify for the last Champions Leegue place!)

Who wud ever have believed that 6 months ago we wud be halfway up the table?

We went 14 games withoot a win and then just one win in 20 games by mid January, before the amazin tornaroond, starting  with a 1-0 win at Leeedz later that month and then another 10 wins since then!

Before the start of the match, there woz a breathtakin flag display on aall 4 sides of the groond curtesy of 'Wor Flags' and we dominated the norf Landaners from the beginnin to the end, with an own goal by White (after pressure from Callum Wilson) and a shot from Bruno, both goals in the 2nd half az we attacked The Gallowgate End!

Wor best performance of the season by a country mile and the best atmosphere for many a year!

Attendance: 52,274

The anly way iz onwards and upwards!

*'Wor Flags' deserve great credit for the flag displays and it must have taken them ages to put aall the flags and plastic black n white sheets on EVERY home seat!👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

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THE TOON v THE ARSE *** TOONEET!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 16th May 2022

"I WOZ BORN UNDER A BIG BLUE STAR!"

PART OF THE 'WOR FLAGS' DISPLAY TOONEET!

NUFC play wor final home game of the season and the great news iz of course that we are safe from the drop and can concentrate on gettin the 3 points to climb the table and not worry wot other teams might dee! (With 2 games to gan the highest we could possibly finish iz 9th---and the lowest iz 15th!)

Wor record against 'The Arse' iz terrible though, az we have won just once in the last 20 attempts and wor visitors have won 18 of the last 19 played!-----SO! 'The Toon' are due a win against them, for sure!

They will be desperate to win to climb above their "norf Landan" rivals Sporz for the final Champions Leegue place, so we will have thoooosands of Sporz fans supportin us on the telly at '8:00 bells' 

Both Kieran Trippier and Callum Wilson are fit again and shud be in the startin line up---we shall see!?

'Wor Flags' are puttin on their biggest ever display and EVERY one of the 49,000 plus, home seats will have a flag on them tooneet! (The Arse have the othaa 3,000)

A Geordie Times match report will appear here az per usual tomorrow sometime-----SO! "Watch this space!"

SPORTSWASHING GEORDIE STYLE!

Posted '12:38 pm bells' Friday 13th May 2022

Much haz been said aboot the NUFC takeower and the word 'sportswashing'---with many Toon fans askin 'The Geordie Times' exactly what the word 'sportswashing' meeenz?
Well!---pleeeze take a look at the picture below for an explanation! 

"NOW THAT'S WOT YOO CAALL 'SPORTSWASHING'!

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NUFC---RECORD BREAKERS!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Thorzday 12th May 2022

Leeedz lost 0-3 at home to Chelseee last neet, which meeenz that they cannit now catch us and that NUFC are now officially safe from relegation to 'the abyss'!

It's a remarkable tornaroond by 'Steady Eddie', az we didnt win ANY of wor forst 14 games and anly won one of the forst 20!----The forst time a team haz EVER escaped relegation after such a poor start!

It iz aall doon to one man (and the new owners of course!), who have somehow dragged us from 20th place and wot looked like certain relegation in mid January, to a safe mid table place with two games to spare in mid May!

A TRUELEEEEE REMARKABLE ACHEEEVMENT!

FROM THIS! ON NOVEMBER 30th 2021

TO THIS! ON MAY 11th 2022

"COME IN NUMBER 4!---YOUR TIME IZ UP!"

 Posted '5:10pm 🔔bells'Wedinzday 11th May 2022

Leaked photos of NUFCs new home and 3rd strip have been released!

To be honest we cannit wait for the new home top with thin black n white stripes and get rid of that horrible thick striped top with the number 4 just below the coller!  It iz aalso a reminder of wor previous owner The Fat Controller, who we need to banish to the history books!

"Good bye and good riddance!:

GEORDIE TIMES QUIZ

 Posted '12:47pm 🔔 bells' Tuesday 10th May 2022

Apart from wor new owner, can yoo spot anybody yoo naa in the Man City directors box?

CLUE!

THE BLUE MOONIES 5 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

Posted from 'high noon bells' onwards, Munday 9th May 2022

"SO BAD AT THE ET-HI-AD!" (A REALITY CHECK FOR WOR NEW OWNERS!)

We travelled doon in a convoy of a 9 seater transit and a black n white car and arrived in good time! (6 big kids and 4 grandkids!)---We parked not too far from the groond and heeded to central Manchester via a short train ride for a few 'gargels' in 'The Lass of Gowrie' (Just one for me az aa woz one of the drivers!)

It woz then onward back to the groond via tram this time and we were in wor seats 30 mins before the start!

The hope woz that the Man City players would still be 'on a downer' after their dramatic Champions Leegue elimination orlier that week!

However!---It woz the complete opposite of that and they went off at frantic pace straight from the kick off!  Within 5 minutes they'd had 3 great chances to take the lead, but, thankfully they fluffed their lines!

It woz anly a matter of time before they scored and sure enough Sterling heeded home with 19 minutes on the clock!

'The Blue Moonies' could have had at least 3 more goals before they scored their 2nd aboot 5 mins before the break through Laporte after Toon goalie Debravka had spilled the baall! 

NUFC could hardly get oot of wor own half and we were very lucky to gan in just 2 goals to the bad at the break! (It could have easily been 5 or 6)

The 2nd half wozzint much better for us and it woz soon 3-0 through a Rodri heeder from a Bruyne corner just on the hour mark!

Callum Wilson and Kieran Tripper then made an appearance for

The Toon after lang absenses through injury and for a brief time we lokked like we could actually score a goal, but Wilson missed a great chance az we tried to attack towards the goal where the 3,000 Toon fans were housed!----but to no avail!

2 goals in stoppage time for the current Premyaa Leegue champions finished us off and a 5 goal thrashin' woz wot we desorved (Could have been a lot more of course!) Wor worst defeat of the season!

The gulf in class between 'them' and 'us' iz immense and with wor owners lookin on from the directors box, they must surely realise that this woz 'a reality check' and major changes MUST be made in the close season!

Attendance: 53, 336 (3,000 Toons fans who kept on singin' right to the bitter end!)

*NUFC have played here 18 times----lost 0-4 twice, 0-5 thrice and  1-6 once!  Wor anly success woz a 0-2 win in the Leegue Cup in 2014-15 and we have just 2 points to show from wor 17 Premyaa Leegue visits!!!---

Perhaps WE shud rename it 'The DREAD-HI-AD' STADIUM!

THE 'BLUE' MOONIES OF MANCLAND v THE TOON *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

 Posted '8:42pm bells' Saturday 7th May 2022

"ONE POINT!--WE ANLY NEED ONE POINT!"

Tomorrow we off to The Etihad to face a Man City side that were devastated last week when they conceded 2 goals in stoppage time v Real Madrid in The Champions Leegue semi final, to take the game to extra time!---Where they conceded again to miss oot on the final! (They certainly got 'the blues'!)

Hopefully, they are still devastated and that NUFC can take advantage of this, especially az this iz the retorn of wor top goalscorer, Callum Wilson, who suffered a bad calf injury in late December---and hazzent played since! Kieran Trippier iznt far off a retorn eethaa, but iz unlikely to feature!

The away section iz sold oot again, with 3,000 Toon fans in The South Stand

Bornley's 3-1 defeat at home to Villaa this afternooon, meeeenz that NUFC anly need ONE point to guarantee survival!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Munday     

FLAG DAY AT THE HEEDBANGERS!

 Posted '1:11pm🔔 bells Friday 6th May 2022

"NEIGHBOURS!---EVERYBODY NEEDS GOOD NEIGHBOURS!"

Gatesheed will lift the National Leegue North title at Gatesheed International Stadium tomorrow and 'Wor Flags' have kindly sent them some of the black n white flags used for wor flag displays to celebrate the occassion! (The Heedbangers play in black n white az well!)

This iz a great gesture to NUFCs near neighbours across the Tyne Bridge and we wish them well for tomorrow!

The Geordie Times woz plannin' to gan to the game--BUT!-we then foond oot that they were playin' H******D, the team aa love to hate and aa swore blind that aa would NEVER gan to see them play, az aa woz one of the unfortunate Toon fans who witnessed that terrible defeat 50 years ago in 1972 (The worst defeat av ever seen in 55 years of followin The Toon away!)

Despite the goodwill gesture, some fans (especially mackem lovers) divvint want this to happen! (They could aalways bring their red n white flags---couldn't they?)

Anyway!---we wish them well for next season in The National Leegue and hope its a great day for The Heedbangers!

Updated '6:16pm 🔔 bells' The Heedbangers won 2-1 in front of a bumper 4,100 plus crowd!

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