"USA AALL THE WAY!"

Posted 6 32 pm bells Trowell truck park M1
Tuesday 16th January 2018

THE GEORDIE TIMES TOP 10 'HIT LIST'!
(16th January 2018)

1 The UK 137,162

2 The USA 40,006

3 The Ukraine 19,956

4 Jawmany 17,470

5 The Israelites 15,063

6 Rushaa 9,100

7 (Lost in) France 6,363

8 (Mee old) China 4,305

9 The Guinness Republic 2,765

10 (Aviva-eh) Spania 1,787

The Geordie Times haz now been viewed in 159 countries and territories aroond the planet Earth (plus MARS!)

 "GEORDIE TIMES FOREVER!"

 

Anothaa 'milestone' haz been reached for The Geordie Times just received its 40,000th pageview from the USA!
And we thank wor friends from across 'the waataa' (ie: 'the pond') for loggin into this NUFC blog
The Ukraine iz aalso close to a landmark total, havin visited this blog nearly 20,000 times! Many thanx to them az well!

Wor "Lets gan on the bevvy in Janu-ery!" crusade haz reached wor USA friends from az far afield az New York, Washington and Chicago and beyond!

"THE TOON ARMY IN CHICAGO SUPPORTS THE GEORDIE TIMES!"

"HOW-WAY THE LADS!" 

  

THE TOON 1 SWANZEE 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2016-2018

Posted '10:57am bells' Sunday 14th January 2018

VIEW OWER THE EAST STAND TOWARDS THE NORTH SEA

ON THE HORIZON, 8 MILES DISTANT!

"THE MUST WIN GAME WE DIDN'T WIN!"

Yet anothaa aaful performance from NUFC which meenz we havent won a home leegue game for 3 months now! (7 games!)

It shud have been ower by half time however, but 5 glorious chances went 'a beggin', 3 of them from Dwight Gayle who missed with 2 easy headers, one from Atsu and one from Perez who shot wide! (3 chances 1st half--2 chances 2nd half!)

1st HALF ACTION AZ WE ATTACK THE LEAZES GOAL

We paid the price for those misses when Swanzee took the lead in the 60th minute when Ayew heeded home at The Leazes End after a fine save by Darlow rebounded to him and he had the simple task of noddin' the baall into the net!

It didn't look good at this stage, especially with fans around us tellin us that most of wor relegation rivals were winnin'!
And then Joselu came on for the ineffective Gayle and within 6 minutes he had levelled things when he shot across the box at an angle and the baall went ower the line at The Gallowgate End to set 'the pressure cooker off' az the crowd roared in relief! 

THE TOON ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE GOAL

We couldnt find a second goal and we nearly lost it at 'the death' with Darlow oot of hiz goal. Luckily we had 2 defenders on the goal line and Yedlin cleared a shot from Bony that would surely have seen the 3 points heed back to sooth Wales!

Wor beloved? owner 'The Fat Controller' iz playin Russian roulettle, by NOT givin Rafa any money for much needed transfors for us to avoid the drop (again!)
When WILL he ever learn!????????????????????

Amazingleee we are STILL 14th in the table, but just 3 points above the drop zone and 4 points behind Evertin in NINTH place!
That's TWELVE teams in danger of bein' relegated!---UNREAL!

Toon team: Darlow, Yedlin, Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Atsu, Shelvey (Merino 82), Diame, Ritchie, Perez, Gayle (Joselu 64)

Attendance: 51,444 (includin' 1,000 Swanzee fans huddled in the top corner of The Leazes End!)

SWANZEE FANS IN THE TOP CORNER

(NEXT TO THE EMPTY SECTION OF SEATS)

(WHICH THEY COULDNT SELL!)

*For wor "Lets have a bevvy in Janu-ery!" 'crusade' see next article doon!

"LETS GAN FOR A BEVVY IN JANU-ERY!" (v SWANZEE)

Posted from 'high noon bells' onwards Saturday 13th January 2018

The "Lets gan on the bevvy in Janu-ery!" 'crusade' continues today when we play Swanzee at SJP

"Hi!  Big Al here!

I'm backing The Geordie Times'z

'Lets gan for a bevvy in Janu-ery' campaign!"

2 lang distance Toon travellers

Stephen from Cleveland Ohio USA

and David from Vancouver Canada

Leazes End

Swanzee fans 'on the bevvy!'

THE TOON v SWANZEE *** SATURDAY AFTERNOOON!

Posted 1:15pm bells Thorsday 11th January 2018

 Swanzee make the lang trek to SJP but will probably anly bring 4 to 500 fans with them---if that!---In total contrast to Luton who had 7,450 here last week for the FA Cup tie!

Its anothaa 'must win game' against the side proppin up the table and the 3 points are vital az wor next game after that iz away to 'champions elect' Man City!!!

11 days into the transfor window and ne sign of any new players to bolster wor squad iz very worryin indeed

Wor 'beloved' owner? 'The Fat Controller' iz playin a game of Russian Roulette and gamblin on wor chances of stayin up--despite promises to Rafa that funds would be available to buy some new players!

Me wonders just how lang Rafa will put up with broken promises  and 'walk the walk!?'

With ne sign of a takeover by Amanda and hor mob, we now fear that it wont happen at aall and we'll be stuck with 'yee naa who'!

It's like havin your muthaa in law livin in your hoose and unable to get rid of hor---or in 'wor case', HIM!!!

Updated 1:38am bells Saturday

Swanzee will be backed by 1,000 fans
(Twice the number we expected!)

NUFC are aimin for wor 3rd win in a row in 2018 and are unbeaten now in 4 games.

A full Geordie Times match and "Lets gan for a bevvy in Janu-ery" drinkin 'crusade' (in defiance of the "Dry January" mob) will appear here later today and Sunday!

"NO ONE LIKES US!---IT'S NOT FAIR!"

Posted 4 40pm bells at Trowell truck park M1 Friday 12th January 2018

News that wor 4th roond FA Cup tie in London or Norwich haz been moved to a Sunday with a ridiculous '1 30 bells kick off time for live telly reaches us!

With busses replacin trains on certain parts of the jorney, in effect meenz that we must travel the day before if we want to see the kick off!

Weve got to de the same again a week later when we gan to Palace for a 2 15 bells start!

How they come to give us these ridiculous kick off times 100s of miles away iz unreal!

We can anly imagine the conversations when they 'plan' wor misery trip!
"How can we f*** up The Toon fans this time?" 

"Why dont we give them a kick off time where they must travel the day before OR make them leave by coach at 3 in the mornin to get there on time!"

"Thats a great idea and a great way to f*** them up!---lets do it!"

"Ha! Ha!"



A total shambles and a disgrace if yoo ask us!-'-but then again we are only daft futbaall fans---arnt we!???

"IT'S NEVAA PLAIN SAILIN AT THE TOON!"

Posted just after 'high noon bells' Wednesday 10th January 2018

News reaches The Geordie Times by the wonders of modern technology (carrier pigeon!) that club legend and U23s heed coach Peter Beardsley, haz been given 'gardenin leave' by NUFC for allegedly bullyin and racially abusin some of wor U23 players!
5 current players and 1 former player have come forward to make the above complaints!
Beardo denies it and the club are holdin their own enquiries in the meentime

In othaa news we hear that Rafa haz been told by 'The Fat Controller' that he must SELL players before he can buy! (I 'FINK' I've hord this one before!?---I 'FINK' I've hord this one before!?---I 'FINK" I-------!!!!????)

And STILL ne news of an inpendin take over!

It's NEVAA plain sailin at 'The Toon'-------IZ IT!!!???

THE CUP DRAW HAZ NOT BEEN KIND!

Posted '12:25pm bells' Tuesday 9th January 2018

The last time we were here

A month ago---lost 3-1 !

The FA Cup 4th roond draw haz paired us to Chelski away when they beat Norwich in their 3rd roond replay! (we can't envisage any othaa result!)
The tie will be played at the end of January and we dont 'fink' it will be picked for live telly!

Yet anothaa train trip to King's Cross (London) against the current Premyaa Leegue champions (we  were anly here in December!)---Anly Man City away could have been worse oot of the 31 clubs we could have met like Rochdale, Mk Dons and Yeovil!


We've got ne luck---thats for certain!

FA CUP DRAW TOONEET!

Posted '12:22pm bells' Munday 8th January 2018

"I HAVE A DREAM!"

The draw for the 4th roond of the FA Cup takes place at '7:00 bells' this evenin  and iz live on BBC 2 and Radio 5 Live!

A home draw would be preferable, but an away tie at a groond that 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have never been to, would be wor 2nd choice!

There are FIVE possibilities oot of the other 40 teams still left in the competition that we could visit!

They are!: Rochdale, MK Dons and Newport who are aall through and Shrewsbury who must replay at West Ham and Fleetwood who must replay at Lestaa!
In all probability the latter 2 will lose to their Premyaa Leegue opponents, which leaves the forst 3 az possible new groonds for 'the mad-sad groundhoppers' to visit!

We are number 27 in the draw and we will let yoo know the outcome az soon az we find oot!

Updated 11:04pm bells @ Woodall sorvices truck park M1

Its CHELSKI AWAY (when they beat Norwich in their replay!)
The 2nd worst tie we could get! 
(Anly Man City away would have been worse!)

THE TOON 3 THE MAD HATTERS OF LUTON 1 *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND

Posted '11:11am bells' Sunday 7th January 2018

"The Toon' Wreck 

'The Mad Hatters' 

Tea Party!"

Tales of the unexpected happened when Rafa sent oot a near full strength team against Luton, when we fully expected a line up of fringe players!
Aalso we didnt expect a crowd of 47,000 plus, despite the fact that The Mad Hatters brought nearly 7,500 fans with them!

Neethaa did the programme publishers, who didnt print enough programmes, az they expected a crowd of 30,000 and subsequently sold oot lang before kick off time!
I woz lucky and managed to get mee hands on one just before they sold oot!

THE TOP DECK OF THE LEAZES END IZ FILLED WITH 'MAD HATTERS'!

The game kicked off and The Toon went straight for 'the jugular' az they attacked The Leazes goal where the Mad Hatters were housed on level 7 of the upper tier--their noisy fanbase stretched aroond the corner of the stand and well into The Milburn Stand!

After several missed chances we finally made the breakthrough on the half hour mark when the Luton keeper fumbled the baall, which fell nicely to the feet of Perez for a simple tap in!

Goal 2 came 6 mins later when again Perez woz on hand after a game of 'head tennis' in the Luton box and he had another easy chance to double wor advantage!

JONJO SHELVEY GOAL

(GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE!)

The thord goal in 9 minutes came just 3 minutes after the 2nd when  a neat 'one two' between Perez and Gayle foond Shelvey just inside the box and he wellied the baall past their dispairin' keeper to effectively wrap up the game and put us into the 4th roond draw on Munday!

WHEY! NOT EXACTLEEE!---this IZ NUFC after aall and not lang after the restart The Mad Hatters pulled one back when Woodman raced from hiz goal to get the baall---he DIDNT and Luton's Hylton had the simple task of hittin' the baall into an empty net to send 'The Tea Party Brigade' into 'party mode'!

ACTION NEAR THE MILBURN STAND

A disallowed goal and a 'bar hit' followed from wor visitors az they desperately tried to pull anothaa goal back az WE desperately defended for wor lives az the clock ticked doon!

WE did have othaa chances to put 'the game to bed' against wor BEDfordshire opponents (sic!), but we just couldn't get a 4th goal!

THE TOON ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE END (2nd half)

'It mattered not' az the clock finally ticked doon and to wor relief a replay doon at Luton woz not needed---(thank god, coz the place iz a dump!)

HAPPY TOON FANS CELEBRATE AZ GRANDSON JAMIE POSES FOR A PHOTO!

Toon team: Woodman, Manquillo, Lascelles (Hayden 31), Clark, Dummett, Richie, Shelvey (Diame 71), Merino (Saivet 80), Murphy, Perez, Gayle

Attendance: 47,069 includin' 7,450 Mad Hatters---wor highest FA Cup 3rd roond crowd since 56,569 torned up half a century ago, when we lost to Carlisle 1-0 in 1968 (I woz there!)
The Mad Hatters had the largest away followin' for a competitive game since Brightin brought 10,000 in 1979, when they won promotion to the top flight---(Rangers had 15,000 for a friendly in 2004) 

PS: For the benefit of wor overseas reeders, Luton's nickname iz 'The Hatters'---hence 'The Mad Hatters' headline!

The
"LET'S HAVE A BEVVY IN JANU-ERY AND FEBU-ERY!" 'crusade' continued in various locations before and after the match!
(In defiance of the 'Dry January Brigade'!) 

TOON FANS HAVIN' A 'BEER PARTY' AFTER THE MATCH

IN THE PREMIER INN!

Footnote: Watched 'Match of the Day' this mornin' and wor game
got precisely ONE MINUTE air time!---aall they showed were the
goals, (no replays!) and nowt else!(Aye I timed it!---1 minute for a programme that woz on for an hour and a half!)---While Lestaa'z goal-less draw at Fleetwood 
got FIVE TIMES az much air time!
(An utter disgrace!---bet if Luton had WON 3-1, it would have been
on for half an hour!)   

THE TOON v THE MAD HATTERS *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND *** SATURDAY

Posted '12:41pm bells' Thorsday 4th January 2018ŕ
Updated Friday just before 'high noon bells'

A TEA PARTY SOMEWHERE IN LUTON!

We take a break from the 'grind' of the Premyaa Leegue when we take on 'The Mad Hatters' of Luton in the thord roond of the FA Cup at 3 bells this Saturday!

We fully expect that NUFC will field a weakened team involvin Woodman in goal and the likes of Saivet and Mitro up front!
Rafa haz since hinted that 'squad players' WILL be used!

Aa meeen!--- lets face reality--- we are very unlikely to 'win the cup', for when (of if) we get through, sooner or later we will get one of the so caalled 'big 6' and it will probably be: "Bye bye Wembley!---Hello free Saturday!"

'The Mad Hatters' will be backed by 7,500 fans for their 'cup final' (they took less than 300 in the last roond at Gatesheed!) (For the benefit of wor overseas reeders, Gatesheed's groond iz 2 miles from SJP on the south bank of the River Tyne!)

And because of unexpected high demand from Toon fans, parts of the top deck of The Milburn Stand will be opened (so we understand!)
Because of this a 40,000 plus crowd iz expected!
Not bad for a game where everybody naaz that we WILL play 'fringe players', against a Leegue 2 side! 

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!
Az per usual---"Watch this space!"