FIXTURE NEWS

Posted '1:00am bells' Tuesday 21st February 2012

"ST JAMES' PARK SINCE 1880
AND AALWAYS WILL BE!"

Wor home game against 'Delia's Rhubarb & Custard Crumbles' of Norwich @ ST JAMES' PARK! will gan aheed az planned on Saturday 17th March @ '3:00 bells', az 'The Combine Harvester Boys' from Norfolk were knocked oot of the FA Cup by Leicester at the weekend. 

Wor game away to 'The Arse' in "norf Landan" on Monday neet 12th March iz a selloot to Toon fans, with ne more tickets available for the away section (ne indication just to just how many tickets we have taken???)

IT'S A 'SIGN' OF THE TIMES!

Posted '2:30pm bells' Monday 20th February 2012

Yet more new signage has been added to the St James' Park waalls!
ST JAMES' PARK SINCE 1880!---AND AALWAYS WILL BE!

GROUND NUMBER(s) 284a and 284b! The Academy of---"Ssshhh!!!---Yee Naa Wot!?", Cleadon ***********SMB U18s 2 THE TOON U18s 2 ***********SMB U16s 0 THE TOON U16s 3 ***********AGGREGATE SCORE 5-2 TO US!

Posted '9:45am bells' Sunday 19th February 2012

(Ground numbers 284a and 284b)
Date of First Visit: 18th February 2012
The Academy of SShhh! (yee naa wot!)

SMB U 18's 2 THE TOON U18's 2
SMB U 16's 0 THE TOON U 16''s 3



"TWO-TWO TO WHO!?"----
"ARE YOO SITTING COMFORTABLY???"---
"THEN I'LL BEGIN!"!

"Dennis Knight score from the penalty spot in
The Toon's U18's game on 'pitch number one'
@ 'The Mobile Tea-Hut End'!"

An unexpected double heeder against the SMB's youngins @ their Cleadon trainin' groond yesterday mornin' meant that we could try? and watch two games simitamiously on two ajoinin' pitches.

It was a new groond(s!) for me and aa anly expected the Toons U18's to be playin', but the added 'bonus' was that the U16's were playin' there az well with both games scheduled to kick off @ '11 bells'

The U16's game, however!, kicked off slightly later with the U18's startin' three minutes beforehand and this was the main game that aa decided to watch more closely!

Aa positioned meesel lookin' southwards towards the 'Seaborn windmill', so aa could glance ower to the U16's game shud there be a stoppage in play in the other!
The anly complication bein' that in the U18's game we kicked northwards towards a mobile tea-hut, which waz positioned behind that goal, (yes!--they had one!) (see main photo!) while in the U16's game, we kicked southwards in the forst half towards the windmill! ("help!")
(A'm not caalled 'The mad-sad groundhopper' for nothin'!)

Anyway!--forst 'blood' was drawn in the U18's game @ '11:26 bells' when the SMB's took the lead.
Their lead waz doubled just two minutes later az the wind howled aroond the isolated pitch, which had ne shelter for miles.

In the U16's game meanwhile, WE took the lead @ '11:38 bells' @ The Windmill End', but aa missed the goal az aa was concentratin' on the other game as we'd just been awarded a penalty which Dennis Knight cooly convorted @ '11:39 @ 'The Mobile Tea-Hut End'! (that's two goals in ONE minute for us at different end's of the groond(s!) (a new record!)


"Meanwhile!---Action from the Toon's U16's game on 'pitch number two'!"


Then in the second period(s) while there waz a lull in play in the U18's game aa torned roond to see wor number ten run through the home sides defence to score a fine goal @ 12:13.

Another goal a minute later for us (which aa missed this time!) sealed the victory for the U16's in that game, so aa concentrated fully on the U18's game from then on! (it doesn't get much dafter than this---folks!)

Wor penalty hero Dennis Knight then got himsel sent off for an alleged elbow on a SMB defender, but that didn't stop us from squarin' the game @ 12:26 precisely, when a Brandon Meile free kick deflected off a mackem's heed and into the net @ 'The Windmill End' and this was the final goal of the game(s)!

Not lang after this, the skies darkened and heavy sleet blew into wor faces for the final few minutes before the ref blew the full time whistle.
This meant that the 100 or so Toon fans in the crowd went yem, happy in the knowledge that at least the 'ten men' didn't get beat!  (most of the 300 or so mackem fans had left by this stage!)

On the way oot a mackem who had stayed, asked a Toon fan known az 'The Bear' wot the final score waz and he telt him that it waz "2-2"
"2-2 TO WHO?", he asked!!!! (there's ne answer to that one---iz there???) 

Combined attendances: 400 (estimated) (100 or so Toon fans/friends/family)


After this we heeded for Dunston for 'The Bad Blue Boys' FA Vase clash against Bethnal Green United of east London. (see match report on this game below!)

BAD BLUE BOYS 3 BETHNAL GREEN UNITED 0

Posted '12:30pm bells' Sunday 19th February 2012

Wor second game of the day ("sorry!---THORD!") waz at Federation Park, Dunston for the eagerlee awaited FA Vase tie between Northern League side Dunston UTS and Bethnal Green of east London.

Before the match the Bethnal team came into the bar and they were big lads aa can tell yoo, and we were telt that they were very physical and that 'The Bad Blue Boys' of Dunston were in for a hard game!

The reality was that they didn't look that taall when they actually got onto the pitch and the fact that most of them were wearin' gloves and tights sent a message to the home team that 'the southern softies' tag wasn't far off the mark!

The Bad Blue Boys took the lead in the bitin' wind through Andy Bulford with a fine effort.
A brace of goal from Danny Shaw sealed Bethnal's fate az hiz second came bang on half time.

The second period waz played oot in freezin' conditions and the 'eest Landeners' just wernt 'up for it'!
'The Bad Blue Boys' now face a trip to Peterborough Northern Star in the qwaataa finals with the ultimate 'goal' a trip to Wembley for the final in May!
Attendance: a disappointin' 327 (az far az we could see Bethnal anly had ONE FAN! at the game)

Footnote:
Whitley Bay lost 2-1 at home to West Auckland and Ashington fans were 'short changed' when they lost 3-0 away to Shortwood United!

A DOUBLE HEADER TODAY!---SMB U18s v THE TOON U18s---Then!---DUNSTON v BETHNAL GREEN in 'THE VASE'!

Posted '9:30am bells' Saturday 18th February 2012

"THE PIES ARE CANNY!---LIKE!"

The repercussions of wor disastrous FA Cup defeat at Brighton three weeks ago are startin' to bite, az it means that the forst team have a blank weekend, due to non participation in the competition.

HOWEVER!----az aalways there iz 'light at the end of the tunnel', for it gives us the opportunity to watch the Toon's U18s in action against their SMB coonterparts @ 'The Academy of "Ssshhhh!---ye na wot!?" in Cleadon this mornin' and 'clock up' another new groond and then we can move on to Dunston Fed @ '3 bells' for their important FA Vase 5th roond cup tie against
Bethnal Green United of 'eeest Landan', home of course to to imfamous Kray Twin gangsters who ruled this part of 'the smoke' back in the 1960's.

Now known az Dunston UTS after their sponsors, 'The Fed' (or 'The Bad Blue Boys', coz they play in aall blue!) are hopin' to get through to the next roond, where a tie away to Peterborough Northern Star or Tiverdale (wherever that iz?) awaits them in the qwaata finals and the 'carrot' of a trip to Wembley for the final in May.
It's six quid to get in for big kids and half price for sprogs and zimmerframites and a crowd of  700 to 1,000 or so is antisipated!---so get there orly, az it's anly a smaall groond!
(Near to the Metro Centre just off the A1 Western Bypass)


Whitley Bay (City Rollers) are aalso in action in The Vase and they have a home tie against West Auckland while 'The Pit Yaakers' of Ashington are away to Shortwood.

Get yerselz alang to one of these games and support one of your local teams!

IT HAD TO HAPPEN!---DIDN'T IT!?

Posted 7:00pm bells' Friday 17th February 2012

A new sign haz just been 'erected' @ St James' Park to replace the old one which waz desecrated yesterday! 

DESECRATION OF SOULS!

Posted '5:00pm bells' Friday 17th February 2012

The front page heedline in tooneets 'Ronny Gill' sez it aall!!! 

A 'CHILLING' MESSAGE FROM 'THE FAT CONTROLLER'!

Posted just before 'high noon bells' Friday 17th February 2012

"IT'S  MY  TRAIN  SET  AND  I'LL DO  WHAT  I  F*****'  LIKE!"       
                                (see below!)

ST JAMES' DESECRATION!---16th FEBRUARY 2012

ST JAMES' PARK HAZ JUST BEEN DESECRATED TODAY!!!

THERE'S NOTHIN' MORE TO SAY REALLY!!!---IZ THERE???

MORE BAD NEWS FOR NUFC GROUNDHOPPERS!--------WACKO JACKO LOCKOOT!

Posted '4:10pm bells' Thorsday 16th February 2012

"WE COULD AALWAYS CLIMB THE FENCE!"

Wor forthcomin' resorve game against Fulham resorves @ Motspur Park, London, which waz due to be open to the public iz now bein' played behind closed doors on April 3rd @ the same venue!

We had intended to de 'this one', az it iz a 'proper groond' with stands and terracin' and we will now have to put 'the feelers oot' to try and get in past security!

The away game against Liverpool resorve will definateleee have to be 'put on ice', az the day before it's due to be played, we face 'The Arse' in London for a Monday neet forst team fixture and wor 'forced' owerneet stay there, puts 'the scuppers' on us gettin' to Morseyside on time for the '2 bells' start. (this is aalso behind closed doors!)

We 'can but try' to get in NEXT season alang with Everton's trainin' groond, which we didn't make orlier this week! (aalso another lockoot---would yoo believe!)