THE FRIAR TUCK MOB OF NOTTINGHAM v THE TOON *** FRIDAY NEET *** THE FRIAR TUCK MOB U21s v THE TOON U21s *** SATURDAY DINNAATIME!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Thorzday 16th March 2023

"FOREST FEAST OF FUTBAALL!"

'The NUFC Mad-Sad Groundhoppers' are off on wor travels again tomorrow and Saturday when we face Forest's forst team at The City Groond on Friday at '8:00pm bells' (A groond we forst visited in 1970) and Forest's U21s at the nearby Nottingham Forest Nigel Doherty Academy on Saturday at '1:00pm bells'  (A groond we have never been tee to watch The Toon!)

A very rare 'double heeder' in 2 days against the same club away---so rare in fact that this haz NEVER happened before! (The Friday game will finish aboot '9:50pm bells' and the Saturday game will start less than 16 hours later!)

A full Geordie Times match report on BOTH games will appear here sometime on Sunday!

Az per usual: "Watch this space!"

PS: Both Brightin and Brentfaad won last neet, to close the gap on NUFC to 2 and 3 points respectively ---so this reeely iz a must win game!

Footnote: The Friar Tuck Mob--an explanation

 Friar Tuck=Robin Hood=Nottingham! Get it?

NO ONE LIKES US! ITS NOT FAIR!

 Posted just after 'high noon bells' Tuezday 15th March 2023

FROM 'THE GEORDIE TIMES' THE DAY AFTER HILLSBOROUGH

News that Sheff Wed have had their groond capacity cut due to overcrowding in the narrow concourses at the Leppings Lane End, when NUFC fans visited durin the FA Cup, have reached 'The Geordie Times'! (2 days late az per usual!)

Wedinzday fans have accussed us of complaining coz we lost and that there woz nee overcrowding! (How do they know?, have they got X-ray eyes that can see through stands???)

However! at least 50 complaints were put in az there WOZ a massive crush in the upper concourse and 'The Geordie Times' even took a photo of it at the time (above) to prove it! (We normally anly take photos of the match action and pub crawls!)

Wedinzday and Sheffeeeld City Council had NOT disclosed the full findings and anly continued pressure from NUFC uncovered the cover up!

The capacity of their dilapidated groond az a result haz been reduced by 1,000 to 33,000, much to the annoyance of their fans! (They actually have 39,000 seats!----6,000 of which cannit be used!)

So that's another fan base who divvint like us, to gan with The SMBs, The Smoggies, Evaatin and Critical Palliss, to name just 4! 😭

FROM NUFC.COM

FROM THE DAILY MAIL

FROM THE OFFICIAL REPORT

AND FROM TWITTER!

REPLY: "HOPEFULLY WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO GAN BACK THERE!"

THE TOON 2 WOLVERHAMPTON WANABEEEZ 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2022-2023

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 13th March 2023

MIGGY'S MAGICAL GOAL TO WIN THE GAME!

 "MIRACLE SAVES BY 'THE POPE' & MIGGY MAGIC!" 

A game we had to win to keep in European contention---and a game we DID win----Just!  The Toon were on top for lang periods and in total had 19 shots on goal, scorin twice!

VIEW FROM MILBURN STAND BALCONY ABOVE THE DIRECTORS BOX

The main taalkin point in the forst half woz in the 20th minute when Nick Pope miscontrolled <(we naa aall the big words'!) a back pass and collided with Wolves Jimenez in the box and for a few seconds we thought that a penalty might be awarded and (God forbid!) Pope would be sent off for the 2nd time in 2 home games!

Thankfully and miraculously The Pope stayed on the pitch az the ref waved 'play on', with nee VAR involved! 

1st HALF ACTION AZ NUFC ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE GOAL

6 minutes later we took the lead at The Gallowgate End when Isak rose above the away defence to heed the baall into the top of the net from a Trippier free kick!  HT 1-0 to NUFC

In the 2nd half Wolves were forced to come oot and 'The Pope' made some 'miracle' saves, the best one from a bullet free kick on the edge of the box!

And then disaster in wor defence when Trippier slipped tryin to clear the baall with Pope on the deck---and it fell nicely for Whang He Chang (who had just come on!) to hit the baall into an empty net for the equaliser!

2nd HALF ACTION AT THE LEAZES END

Just when it looked az though we would have to settle for a draw, up stepped anothaa sub---this time Miggy Almiron to hit a great cross field shot into the far corner of the net at The Leazes End with 12 minutes left on the clock, to win the game for us!---The crowd went wild---more out of relief---az we picked up the 'precious' 3 points to leapfrog Livaapoool into 5th place and just 4 behind Sporz in 4th with TWO games in hand!

Can another 'miracle' possibly happen--and we qualify for the Champions Leegue next season???----Divvint rule it oot, although we need several new players to boost wor squad to have any chance!

We play 'The Friar Tuck Mob' of Nottingham away on Friday neet and a win would see us just that point from Sporz with that game in hand--and just 3 behind Moan U---who divvint play a Leegue game til they play us at the beginnin' of April, coz they are in FA Cup action next weekend!

A win against Moan U at SJP would see us leapfrog 'them' on goal difference az well!   MIRACLES CAN HAPPEN!  

Attendance: 52,240 (Less than 3,000 Wanabeeez!)

*

PS: Aa watched Match of the Day on Saturday and Sunday neet and it woz great to hear the crowds roar when a goal woz scored---and nee condescendin' commentary at aall to spoil it! (Just like when yoo actually attend a game!)

Aalso nee patronizin' views from the pundits, drawin arrows and circles on the screen to tell us 'idiots' something we have just seen, but divvint understand coz we are thick! The anly disappointment woz that it woz anly on for 20 mins each day!?

We see that the BBC have came to a comprimise with 'yee naa who' to present MOTD again next week! ---

"BLOODY SPOILSPORTS!"  

THE TOON V WOLVERHAMPTON WANABEEZ *** SUNDAY AFTERNOOON!

 Posted from 'high noon🔔 bells' onwards, Friday 10th March 2023

IF YIV EVER WONDERED WHY WOR GROOND IZ CAALLED ST. JAMES' PARK, WELL 'NOW YI NAA'!

ST JAMES STREET---IN THE SHADOWS OF THE EAST STAND!

We play Wolves in a vital game to keep us in contention for at least a UEFA Cup place!

NUFC have hit a bad patch and we havvint won in wor last 5 Leegue games, takin anly 3 points in the process and slipping doon to 6th in the table!

Joelinton iz suspended, havin picked up hiz 10th yellow card at Man City last week, while Isak and Gordon are likely to be paired up front in preference to Callum Wilson who iz 'oot of sorts' at the moment!

'Fab' Schar iz expected to retorn, while Bruno iz carryin an ankle injury and iz 50/50 to start!

It's a '4:30 🔔 bells' start for the telly (SKY) and iz a complete sell oot, with Wolves retornin 200 of their 3,200 allocation! (These tickets were eagerly snapped up by Toon fans within minutes of bein released!)

Are we ready for The Champions Leegue yet?

Whey, we honestly 'fink' that with not much strengh in depth, we would struggle against the elite of Europe at the moment!

The fact that Matt Richie woz one of the subs who came on in The Leegue Cup final, tells yoo that!  He played for us in The Championship in 2016 and although he aalways gives 100%, he, alang with a few others, iz sadly past their 'sell by date'!

2 more summer transfer windows and we shud be there--but not at the moment a'm afraid!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here az per usual, sometime on Munday!   Az per usual!   "Watch this space!"

Updated '2:40pm 🔔 bells' Saturday

Bournemoooth beat Livaapoool 1-0 so we are just one point behind the Mickey Mousers with two games in ✋!

So far so good!🤪👍

Updated 11:05am bells' Sunday

Sporz beat Forest 3-1 and move 7 points aheed of us in the race for a Champions Leegue spot!  However! we dee have THREE games in hand ower them! 

If? we can beat Wolves today and win at Forest next Friday? we will be within ONE point of Sporz!

A Europa Leegue spot however, looks the most likely outcome now, me 'finks' (ie: NUFC have more chance of winnin THAT Cup!) (Although Brightin and Fulim are breathing doon wor necks, just 2 points behind us!)

So this iz definatly a 'must win game' today!

"HELLO BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS!"

 Posted '1:00pm bells' Tuezday 7th March 2023

A brand new country haz just visited The Geordie Times this week!

"Hello British Virgin Islands!" and welcome!

42 page views in the last week from them, bringin the grand total of countries and territories to 162 who have visited us ower the last 10 years or so! (Plus the planet MARS of course!)

The British Virgin Islands are in the Caribbean Sea near Cuba and Jamaica  

A BITTER SWEET WEEKEND!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 6th March 2023

REALITY CHECK!

*It hazzint been a good weekend so far for NUFC az we slip doon to 6th place in the table, havin not won in wor last 5 Premyaa Leegue games, takin just 3 points in the process!

We cannit stand Moan U and their fans, but we needed them to win yesterday at Anfield--- but they got slaughtered 7-0 by The Liverbirds, who leapfrog us to 5th place in the table!---A *bitter sweet weekend for certain after wor 2-0 defeat at The Emptyaid Stadium against Man Citih on Saturday! (10 minutes from the end, they left in droves, despite bein' 2-0 up at the time!)

Tooneet Brentfaad are at home to Fulim in the west London derby and shud Fulim win, then, they will gan above us az well and we will drop to 7th place! (NUFC were in 2nd place on Boxin' Day!)

This iz a reality check I'm afraid az we are not good enough to qualify for The Champions Leegue at the moment!----Give NUFC 2 years and we WILL be ready---for that we are sure!

"KEEP THE FAITH!---NUFC!"

*Bitter sweet an explanation

Bitter coz we lost and Livaapoool went above us

Sweet coz Moan U got slaughtered az their fans tried to take the p*ss durin and after the League Cup final!

I wonder how they're aall feeling today after losin 7-0 against their most hated rivals???

Wot gans aroond comes aroond!

PS: Brentfaad beat Fulim 3-2 so NUFC are still in the top 6

THE BLUE MOONIES 2 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2022-2023

 Posted 'high noon 🔔 bells' Sunday 5th March 2023

"THE WHEELS ARE BUCKLIN'!"

With 2 defeats in a row, includin' wor Leegue Cup final defeat v Moan U last Sunday  the last thing we needed woz an away games against the current Premyaa Leegue champions!

VIEW FROM TIER 2, ROW P

However!---It woz NUFC who shud have taken the lead az we kicked towards the far goal from us, when Callum Wilson, just 6 yards oot scuffed the baall and the chance woz gone!

New boy Anthony Gordon aalso missed a good chance before Foden opened the scorin in the 15th minute az he beat Dan Burn on the byline aand hiz shot woz deflected in off Sven Botman's boot, to totally wrang foot Nick Pope in The Toon goal!

Sean Langstaff then had a great chance to equalise, but again poor finishin let us doon! HT 1-0 to them

Anothaa glarin miss, this time for Joelinton who woz practically on the goal line when he scuffed hiz shot in front of The Toon faithful, cost us dearly, az just a few mins later Silva delivered the fatal blow in the 67th minute, when Trippier woz dispossesed near the 18 yard box! 2-0 to the home side az their fans finally woke up!

The atmosphere from The Blue Moonies fans woz terrible and just like their cross city counterparts last Sunday, they started leavin well before full time az empty light blue seats started to emerge from the 80th minute onwards!?----It must be sommik in the Manchester blood that makes them dee this!

Wor thord 2-0 defeat in a row az the wheels start bucklin!  WE reeeely dee need to boonce back againt Wolves at SJP next Sunday, az a European Champions Leegue place now looks in severe danger!

*Attendance: 53,419 (woz there reeely?) Includin 3,000 Toon fans spread ower 3 tiers!

4th placed Sporz lost at Wolves, so we are still just 4 points behind them with 2 games in hand!

Coz of the orly '12:30 🔔s' kick off time, we anly had time to dee ONE drinkin den near the groond!

Runnin total now 117 different drinkin dens for away games this season!

4 magpies together were spotted before the game, but it didn't bring us much luck!---did it?

A Toon crested coach pulls into the away coach park!

LEEGUE CUP FINAL PUB CRAWL!

 Posted '9:30pm🔔 bells' Saturday 4th March 2023

Havin got back from Wembley in the orly hours of Munday mornin and then havin to gan to graft later on, aa didnt have time to dee the Aylesbury pub crawl report, where we were based before catchin a direct train to Wembley from there for the match!

So a grovelling apology from us!

Below are the Aylesbury Ale hoose report from the the neet before and on  the day of the match!--one week late!--this iz The Geordie Times!---wot the hell did yoo expect???

In total we visited 6 drinkin dens, bringin the total for the season by last Sunday to 116 away liquid lubrication locations!

GRUMPY STUMPY DRINKIN BROON ALE OOT OF A WINE

GLASS!- WOTZ THE WORLD COMIN TEE???

THE BLUE MOONIES v THE TOON *** DINNAATIME SATURDAY

 Posted from 'high noon bells' onwards, Friday 3rd March 2023

"THE WEST END IZ THE BEST END!"

We travel to east Mancland tomorrow after the disappointment of Wembley the week before, when NUFC fans torned the west end of the stadium black n white! (Literally!)

With Man City chasin the Premyaa Leegue title again, this will be probably wor toughest away game of the season!  Aall 3,000 away tickets were sold lang ago!

NUFC have slipped oot of the Champions Leegue places doon to 5th az the wheels have started wobblin'!

Bruno iz said to be fit but Ryan Fraser haz been told to train with the U21s squad az 'Steady Eddie' says he isn't committed to the cause!

Hopefully we can get sommik oot of the game---but divvint haad yih breath!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

PS: We are travellin doon in mee 9 seater 'canny tranny', which haz just had a brilliant 'blue star' logo added to the back door, which sits very nicely alang side the Tyne bridges logo, which woz done a while back!

If yoo want one for your vehicle, it woz done by the excellent 'Ellis Signs' of Patterson Street, Blaydon-on-Tyne!

ellissigns.co.uk

COME IN NUMBER 34!

 Posted '1:00pm bells' Wedinzday 1st March 2023

The Geordie Times doesnt reeely copy off othaa NUFC websites but we 'fink' that Biffa and  Niall off nufc.com desorve a mention az they have made a very valid point aboot just how many teams have won a domestic trophy since we won one way back in 1955! ----

THORTY THREEE! (33!) thats reet 33 clubs!!!! 

The list iz staggerin' and includes Mickey Mouse teams like Luton, Bormingham, Oxfaad, Wigan, Swindon, Wimbledon, QPR, Smoggies and of course the SMBs, who have aall won eethaa the FA Cup or Leegue Cup since then!

The so caalled 'big six' are at the top of the tree and are aall in double figures!----Its aboot time WE won sommik!---Isn't it just!----Wor time will come in the not too distant future!---For that we are sure!---Lets hope we are aall still alive to see it!??? 

"KEEP THE FAITH!"----"NUFC!"

(From nufc.com)