EVERY PICTURE TELLS A STORY!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Thorzday 2nd September 2021

NUFC OWNER'S OFFICE!--TRANSFOR DEADLINE DAY!

A HARD DAYS NIGHT!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Wedinzday 1st September 2021

The Toon are the dark top, with yellow shorts and socks

NUFCs U21s were comprehensivly beaten 3-0 at Hillsborough last neet in The Papa John's Trophy by Sheff Weds forst team!

The home side took the lead just before the break through Sow and doubled it 6 mins into the 2nd half through Johnson, with a shot in off the post! Palmer made it 3-0 just after this and wor young guns were very lucky that we didnt concede any more goal az the shots rained in!

In total Wedinzday had 29 shots to wor 2, of which 8 were on target, while we had NONE on target! And the corner coont woz 12-0 to the home side!

This woz wor 8th defeat in a row in the competition in front of a 6,593 crowd, which included 25 NUFC diehards in The Leppings Lane End!

On the transfor front, The Geordie Times can report that there were NEE more forst team players signed when the window closed at '11:00 bells' last neet!  That meeenz that Joe Willock iz wor ANLY permanent signin' and we have recruited a total of ZERO players on  loan deals! (The Choudhury loan deal from Lestaa fell apart, due to disagreement ower hiz wages!)

"All together now!"

🎵 Its been a hard days night and we're gannin to the dogs!

Its been a hard days night and we're headin for a slog!

And with nee signings today, we'll have to hope and pray!

That it will be alright?--in the relegation fight!🎵

WEDINZDAY ON TUESDAY AND WOTFAAD NEXT MUNDAY!

 Posted 'high noon 🔔bells' Tuesday 31st August 2021

THE MAGNIFICENT MAIN STAND AT CLARENCE PARK,                                                  HOME OF ST. ALBANS CITY FC!

With nee forst team game for a fortnight because of the International break, wor U21s take centre stage tooneet and are in action toonet at Sheff Wedinzday in the Papa John's Trophy--- and next Munday wor U23s play at St Albans, in the Premyaa Leegue Cup, where wor U23s play Wotfaad!

Of course 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have been to Sheff Wed's Hillsborough groond before, BUT have NEVER been to Clarence Park in St. Albans!

A 'Geordie Times' match report on both games will appear here in due time!

PS: The transfor window shuts at '11:00 bells' tooneet!---But don't hold your breath for any incomin' transfors---or even loan players!

THE TOON 2 THE SIMON TEMPLAR MOB 2 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 29th August 2021

VIEW FROM THE MILBURN STAND BALCONY

"NAR! NAR!---IT'S DOON TO VAR!" (Again!)

Anothaa inept forst half display had the fans bayin' for wor heed coaches heed, with loud chants of: "We want Brucey out, we want Brucey out!", half way through the half-----We didnt have one shot on target in the whole of the half, while Sooothampton missed a canny few chances at the othaa end, and shud have been at least 2 goals to the good at the break!  HT 0-0

We came oot of the blocks at the start of the 2nd half and within 5 minutes Callum Wilson had put us 1-0 up at The Gallowgate End, with a fine heeder!

The lead lasted 20 minutes when wor visitors equalised after a mad scramble in the box, when Toon goalie parried the baall oot, where Elyounoussi 👈( hope av spelt that reet?) woz waitin' to hit home!

More chants against Bruce were forthcomin' at this point---and they were loud! (It shud be noted that some fans had voted with their feet, az there were huge empty gaps in The Leazes End!)

VIEW FROM THE GALLOWGATE END---NOTE THE EMPTY SEATS IN LEVEL 7 OF THE LEAZES END OPPOSITE! (Special thanx to Steev for the photo)

Just when it looked like it would end 'ones a piece', Saint Maximin raced into the box to hit a rebound from a Ryan Fraser shot, into the net in the 90th minute to send the crowd wild with delight!

It wasn't to be though, az deep into stoppage time, Lascelles woz adjudged to have commited a foul on former Toon player Adam Armstrong in the box---and the big screen at The Leazes End said a possible penalty woz bein reviewed by the VAR people!---The ref then ran ower to the monitor at The East Stand and after a lang look, gave the penalty to Sooothampton!----Ward-Prowse duly scored to send the 950 members of 'The Simon Templar Mob' wild with relief, high up in The Leazes End! 

A sickenin' end to the game, az this penalty woz scored in the 96th minute!----In reality they desorved at least a point, but Brucey az usual disagreed and said that he woz very, very, disappointed with the chantin against him!---But wot does he expect with NEE wins in wor forst fower games! FT 2-2

The draw 'lifts' NUFC to 15th place in the table and oot of the relegation zone! (for the time being at least!)

Attendance: Just 44,017

The Simon Templar Mob---an explanation!

Simon Templar woz a fictional character in the 1960's detective series caalled 'The Saint', played by Roger Moore----Sooothampton's nickname of course iz 'The Saints' 

THE TOON V THE SIMON TEMPLAR MOB *** PREMYAA LEEGUE ** 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon🔔bells' Saturday 28th August 2021

NUFC fans-- the daydreamers! 

'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' 'dream' of an away Leegue Cup tie against Newport, in the next roond (coz we couldn't gan there durin' lockdoon last season!), lay in tatters, az we lost on penalties to 'The Bornley Hillbillies', while wor opponents today Sooothampton won 8-0 AT NEWPORT!

To say the least, after a result like that, Sooothampton will be 'up for it' at SJP this afternooon, while we are on 'a downer' after 3 succesive defeats against teams who aall play in claret and blue!

Failure to win or even get a draw iz a real possibility and wor next opponents are Moan U, who have just resigned Ronaldo!

NUFC fans can anly dream of signin a 'Ronaldo'---The 'have's and the 'have nots' could not be forthaa apart!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!

APU "Watch this space!"

THE TOON 0 THE BORNLEY HILLBILLIES 0 (BORMLEY WIN 4-3 ON PENS) LEEGUE CUP 2021-2022

 Posted '12:35am bells' Friday 27th August 2021

Graeme Jones stands in the centre to gee the players up for the penalty shootout, while Brucey stands at the side with arms folded, wondering what hiz wife haz cooked for hiz late supper!

According to wor heed coach 'Broken Nose Bruce' we didn't lose this game, az penalty shootouts are a lottery!--But NOT in wor case, az we have now lost FIVE in a row at SJP in the Leegue Cup since 1979! (A lottery meeenz yoo win some and lose some!)

30,000 were here to witness nee shots on target from 'us' in the forst half az we attacked The Gallowgate goal--and 3 on target in the 2nd period at the Leazes End!

We should have won, but failed to take wor chances and paid the price!

Bornley will gan doon in history az havin nee shots on goal at aall, but still progressed to the 3rd roond of the competition with a 4-3 penalty win at The Leazes End!

Saint Max missed wor forst one and Almiron missed wor 5th one! Joe Willock, Joelinton and Sean Longstaff scored wor pens, in between wor misses!

Attendance: 30,168 includin 350 Hillbillies in the upper tier of The Leazes End, aall on their lonesome, az the rest of the upper tiers remained empty!

349 liberty way, nuneaton (v birmingham city u23s)

 Ground number 349

Date of First Visit: 22nd August 2021

Liberty Way Stadium, Nuneaton

Birmingham City U23s  0

Newcastle United U23s  4 (Charlie Wigget, Dylan Stephenson(2), Own goal)

Premier League 2

Attendance: 168, plus 2 freebeez on a roof owerlookin the groond!  (Aboot 30 Toon fans)

Can yoo spot the 2 kids on the roof ootside the groond?

PS: There looked to be far less than 168 at the game and we estimated a 120 'crowd' at the most?

Charlie Wiggett's heeded goal

 

"A STICKY END FOR THE BRUMMIES IN TREACLE TOWN!"

The game woz moved at very short notice to Liberty Way in Nuneaton from Bormingham's St Andrews Stadium, (coz they had a home Leegue cup tie the next day v Fulim), so 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' had little time to make arrangements to visit this new groond for a Toon game!

But we are a resilient lot, and in total 30 or so NUFC fans made the game, az well az aboot 90 groundhoppers from Bormingham! (The forst time they had seen their team play here az well)

Nuneaton iz known az 'treacle town', coz large amounts of the black stuff are made there!

On arrival after wor 200 mile jorney from the north east in mee 'canny tranny', we parked up in a car park next to the groond, anly to be told by a gadgy that we couldnt park there az the gates would be locked and we wouldn't be able to get oot! He even asked if we had removed a barrier to get in!

THE OPEN YELLOW BARRIER! "HONEST MISTER, IT WASN'T US WHO OPENED IT!"

Anyway, we drove ootside and parked up, anly to find oot that we could indeed park inside the clubs car park by a Nuneaton official!---totally confused we went and got the van and drove it back in again!

"This iz gettin very complicated!", aa said to travellin companion 'Glennn from Ashington', az we heeded for the clubhoose for a pre match 'gargel' to regain wor senses!

"IZ THERE ANYBODY THERE!?"

The clubhoose woz completely empty apart from one barmaid (and us 2!), az we sat doon to consume wor 'golden liquid' and to study the team sheets!

3 Brummie fans then walked in and just after this 'mad-sad groundhoppers' Dave from York and hiz sidekick Alex of St George wandered through the door!---And that woz it!--So NUFC fans actually ootnumbered the Brummies by 4 to 3!

Because the clubhoose woz SO empty, just 30 mins from kick off, we predicted a very low crowd of aroond aboot 100!

CAN YOO SPOT THE TOON FAN IN WOR OLD GREEN AND THIN BLUE STRIPES AWAY TOP AMONGST THE EMPTY BLUE SEATS?

We were reet, az the wornt many there, but we spotted a few more 'NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' ower at the other side of the pitch!

The game kicked off in warm sunshine and straight away wor youngins went on the attack and within 12 minutes we had taken the lead with a from Charlie Wiggett heeder (See above pic) Hiz forst goal for the club---(Just before this Joe White had hit the post!)

It woz aall one way traffic and we doubled wor lead in the 37th minute when Dylan Stephenson fired home past the Brummies keeper!

"COME IN NUMBER 55!"

At half time we wandered to the other side of the pitch to have a bit chin wag with some fellow 'hoppers'

One woz a Toon fan known az 'Secret Pigeon' and he woz non too pleased with the tornstile operator, coz she asked him if he woz a consession (ie: An old aged pensioner!)  "I'M ONLY 55!", he told hor angrily and he paid the full price to get in, which woz £4 (little old me got in for £2!) 🤣

PLEASE NOTE--- THIS PICTURE ISN'T 'DOCTORED'!!!

*It woz still warm az the sun set in the distance and again NUFC went for the jugular!

Bormingham's Rico Browne woz shown a straight red card for pulling back Stephenson and we took full advantage of this with further goals from Stephenson himself and wot looked like an own goal, just before the end to make it a 4-0 rout for the black n whites!  --a very satisfactory victory!

Wot wasn't 'satisfactory' woz the jorney back, when we had to divert from the M1 due to a massive traffic jam and went through Sherwood forest to the A1!

I dropped Glennn from Ashington off at Ashington(would yoo believe?) and had to divert again off the A1 southbound through Blakelaw and Scotswood coz the road woz shut owerneet for roadworks! Aa finally got yem at '2:00am 🔔bells' and mee 'canny tranny' had clocked 425 miles for the trip in total! (includin the 2 diversions of course!)

A tiring trip, but the 4-0 win and a new groond to boot, woz DEFINATLY worth the effort!

The 'Geordie Times' seat in the press box!

NUFC LOST TO BEDFORD TOON IN THE FA CUP IN 1963!

FOOTNOTE: NUFC's forst team play Bornley in The Leegue Cup at SJP tooneet and a full 'Geordie Times' match report will follow on Thorsday OR Friday (Got to gan to work orly tomorrow, so it will probably be Friday when the match report appears!

Remember wor motto: "Fear NOT!---we will bring yoo the news forst hand, second! (Or shud that be second hand forst!?")----This IZ 'The Geordie Times' after aall!

GROUND NUMBER 349

 Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 24th August 2021

Because of time restraints and the fact aa didn't get in the hoose til '2:00am bells' this mornin'---and have to gan to work soon, the match report from Bormingham U23s and NUFC U23s at Nuneaton Borough's groond will NOT be forthcomin' until tomorrow!

Apologeeez for anybody wantin' to read the match report, which NUFC won 4-0---but this iz 'The Geordie Times' after aall---and remember wor motto: 

"Fear not!--We will bring yoo the news forst hand, second!" (Or iz it "second hand, forst?")🤔

THE BRUMMIES U23S V THE TOON U23S *** AT NUNEATON TOONEET!

 Posted 'high noon 🔔bells' Munday 23rd August 2021

LIBERTY WAY STADIUM, NUNEATON BOROUGH FC

'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' are off on their travels again tooneet, when wor U23s play Bormingham U23s at Liberty Way, Nuneaton at '7:00 bells' in a Premyaa  Leegue 2 game!

This iz of course a NEW GROOND and a smaall followin iz predicted for both 'us' (6 or 7!) and Bormingham(100 maybee?), az Nuneaton iz a 50 mile roond trip from their St. Andrews home!

A Geordie Times match report will appear here at some point this week! (Hopefully tomorrow?)

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

THE HAZBEENZ & VILLIANS 2 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2021-2022

 Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 22nd August 2021

"CAT ACLYSMIC EVENTS IN BORMINGHAM!"

A torturous fower hour train jorney to the black country from 'The Central' (station) woz wor profored mode of transport for wor forst competitive away game in one and a half years, due to the 'bat out of hell' pandemic!

On arrival it woz off to The Wellington real ale boozer up the hill from New Street station (Bormingham), az this iz wor usual 'haunt' when we are in these parts!

The bar woz packed az we arrived at 'high noon bells' with one occupant of the seats the boozers tabby cat which woz corled up on one of the chairs!

Az there were nee spare seats it woz quickly 'shooed away' by 'Big Al' (NOT the sheet metal workers son!) so that he could sit doon, to loud groans of disgust from the other punters, which included several Villa and Toon fans!

Anyway!---after a few 'gargels' it woz time to heed for the groond, which iz a 10 minute train ride to Witton station, a 5 minute waalk from the away tornstiles!

And I'm afraid to tell yoo that it woz the same old story az we huffed and puffed wor way through the 90 minutes of 'non futbaall' from the men in dark blue(wor away strip)

Callum Wilson had a great chance orly on, when he woz clean through, but missed the target to a load of sarcastic cheers from the Villa fans in The Holte End, the end where we were kickin' towards, in the forst period! 

And that woz it I'm afraid, az we never had another chance like that again in the half, even though we dominated the forst half of the half!

Villa wornt any better eethaa, but they took the lead bang on half time with a spectacular 'ower heed sizzers kick' from an unmarked Danny Ings, which gave Freddie Woodman in the Toon goal, nee chance, az he woz rooted to the spot! 1-0 to 'them' at the break!

The 2nd half woz dominated by VAR decisions, which went against us, az Lascelles woz deemed to handle the baall in the box and after a lengthy VAR check a penalty woz given to the home side, much to the disgust of the 3,000 away followers in The Doug Ellis Stand on the side of the pitch! 

El Ghazi took it and sent Woodman the wrang way, to put us 2-0 behind!

Az we hadn't had a single shot on target til this point, it didnt look good!

It got even worse when Callum Wilson woz hauled doon in the box and a penalty woz awarded to 'us'

After wot seemed like half an hour, the decision woz owertorned, az Wilson woz deemed by VAR to be offside and a free kick woz given to the home side instead, much to the anger of the Toon fans, some of whom started fightin' with the Villa fans, next to the segregation fence!

We DID have one shot on target in the 2nd half, by Saint Maximin in the 73rd minute, but it woznt to be and VAR and wor own shortcomings won the day and the game for Villa!

VAR aside, this woz a terrible performance by NUFC against a very average Villa side and of course Brucey had hiz ready made excuses for the post match press conference! (See below)

After the match we heeded back to 'The Welly' to droon wor sorrows, before catchin THREE trains back to The Toon!---On the train we bumpted into 'Simon from Whitley Bay' and 50 of hiz party, who had came doon by bus, but the driver 'p*ssed off and left them stranded in the coach park next to the groond!

They didnt have any train tickets of course, but luckily for them, there were nee ticket checks on the entire jorney back and the ticket gates were open at 'The Central' when we arrived at '11:11pm bells'!

 

Attendance 41,964 includin nearly 3,000 Toon fans