"LIFE BEGINS AT 40,000!"

Posted '12:57pm bells' Wednesday 23rd October 2013

"TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER!"
"WHEY AYE MAAN!"

Yet anothaa 'historic'? landmark haz been passed in the last day or so, az 'The Geordie Times' haz just receeeved it's FORTY THOOOSANDTH PAGEVIEW from owerseas (and the solar system beyond!)

Oot of the near 84,000 'hits' in total, we have nearly 43,800 from the old UK (England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales) and a total (at the time of writin'!) of  40,200 from the rest of world, of which ower a third iz from the USA alone!

With a grand total of 144 countries and territories (plus Mars!) 'The Geordie Times' iz indeed  'a global brand'!

Again! we thank each and every one of yoo for viewin' this daft site!

Owerseas countries with ower 1,000 pageviews

1 USA***13,996
2 Ukraine***4,200
3 China***2,200
4 Jawmany***1,700
5 Guinness Republic***1,070
6 Rushaa***1,060

THE TOON 2 THE LIVERBIRDS 2

Posted '12:30pm bells' Sunday 20th October 2013


THE TOON ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE END DURIN' THE 2nd HALF
(View from Level 7 Balcony)

Az there hadn't been a goal-less draw between the two side for aalmost 40 years iz waz predictable that there would be goals in this game az well!

Before the match an estimated 500 strong (weak?) protest march against 'The Fat Controller' took place from The City Haall to Leazes Park by disgruntled fans, sick of the comical goins on at the club! (We @ 'The Geordie Times' didn't take part az we felt it waz a complete waste of time!---IF we thought for 'one second' that we could get 'The Fat Controller' to sell the club by marchin' through the city centre then we would have joined in--pronto!)

Anyway!---we heeded for the tornstiles (after 'marchin' from 'The Companions Club' in Leazes Park Road!) in trepidation of wot might happen followin' wor six-nil defeat to the Scousers just six months ago @ St James'!

However!---a suprize waz in store for us az WE actually took the lead at the mid-point of the half---when!--oot of the blue!--- Yohan Cabaye hit a 30 yard screamer into the corner of the net @ 'The Leazes End', leavin' former SMB keeper Mingolet with 'nee chance' az he dived in vain to save it!

And then came 'the game changer' when Yanga grabbed Suarez by the shoulder and predicably the 'litte biter' went doon like 'a sack of taaties' in the penalty box to win the spot kick!
Yanga, bein' the last man waz subsequently sent off by ref Marriner and Gerrard stepped up to score hiz 100th goal for The Liverbirds to level the game just before the half time interval!

We expected the visitors to tear into us in the 2nd period but The Toon gave az good az they got and supersub Paul 'Dummy' Dummett put us back in the lead after a Yohan Cabaye free kick foond him at the far post unmarked and he gleefully excepted the chance to welly the baall into The Liverbirds net in the 56th minute!

The visitors then piled the pressure on and got back on level torms again when Suarez crossed for Sturridge to nod home in the 72nd minute!
We were then prayin' for the final whistle and had a scare deep into injury time when a Suarez free kick on the edge of the box waz superbleee saved by Tim Krul in The Toon goal!
A 2-2 draw waz a great result considerin' that we anly had 10 men for most of the match!

It waz then the lang 'march' back to 'The Companions' <(approx. 200 yards!) for some more (much needed!) 'liquid lubrication'!

Toon team: Krul, Debuchy, Santon, Tiote, Williamson, Yanga, Gouffran, Cabaye (Anita 78, Ben Arfa (Sammy Ameobi 78), Sissoko (Dummett 44), Remy

Attendance: 51,703 (3,200 Mickey Mousers!) <(who let off flares and bangers!) (The crowd waz 600 short of capacity az NUFC refused to put tickets on general sale!--but waz still the highest of the season so far!)
Average Premyaa Leegue home attendance: 49,813***
Best in the north east, 3rd best in the UK and 13th best in the world!

THE TOON v THE LIVERBIRDS ***SATURDAY DINNAATIME!

Posted '1:24pm bells' Friday 18th October 2013

ACTION FROM THE TOON v THE LIVERBIRDS IN APRIL

Aftaa yet anothaa enforced break due to the World Cup qualifications we find worsels up against The Liverbirds just SIX months aftaa wor worst home defeat against them in livin' memory, when the Morseysiders put SIX past us with ne reply!

Fab Coloccini definitely winnit start for us az he haz a groin injury and we here that 'spiderman' (Gutierrez) haz went back yem to Argentina for personal reason and aalso wont feature in this live telly '12.45 bells' kick off.

The usual monotonous 'battlecry' of "We wont let you down this time!" "etc! etc!", from the players haz been splattered ower the local 'rags' and we can anly hope that THEY DONT THIS TIME!? 

Lets aalso hope the papers on Sunday and Monday arnt full of headlines from Toon players sayin' "We are sorry!" ---"We let you down!" "etc! etc!" yet again!

Toon fans are on the march tomorrow in protest at the runnin' of the club and it 'kicks off' at 10:30 bells' at 'The City Haall' and ends at the Leazes Park bandstand sometime later!
'The Geordie Times' wont be represented at the march, az quite frankly, we cannit see 'The Fat Controller' sellin' the club because of a few hundred fans marchin' through the city centre!---but we wish them well in their protest! (if we thought for 'one second' that he would sell up because of this, we would aall be there 'en mass'!)

A full match report will follow on Sunday sometime---lets hope it isn't a 'disaster report' like April's!?

"JUST THE TICKET!" ***"FIFTEEN QUID? ***WE'RE HAVIN' A LAFF!"

Posted '1:11pm bells' Thorsday 17th October 2013

THE VISITORS SECTION @ WBA LAST APRIL 
LAST SEASON £39---THIS SEASON £15!
***HORRAY FOR COMMON SENSE!

AT LAST!****some good news for travellin' supporters who are continueleee ripped off with high ticket prices!

'The Baggie Troosers' of West Brom and 'The Toon' have agreed to let visitin' supporters into their groond for az little az FIFTEEN QUID when the two team clash home and away later this season!
This iz an adult savin' of £24 and shud be welcomed with open arms!

Swanzee have aalso agreed with us to reduce prices to TWENTY QUID when the two teams play in sooth Wales in December and the retorn @ St James' in April!

A BIG BLACK MARK ('X') however must gan to 'The Canary Custards' of Norwich who REFUSED to 'play ball' and we will be charged FORTY FIVE QUID! <(shame on yoo!) for wor midweek visit there in January! (Lets hope (and pray!) that Delia borns hor next custard crumble to cinders!)

INGERLAND 2 THE POLAR BEARS 0 !

Posted '1:55pm bells' Wednesday 16th October 2013

So England have qualified for the World Cup in Brazil next year and at least it gives us sommik to de durin' the close season az we gan 'England tellyhoppin'!

A'v nevaa been a big England fan but will be watchin' the games in somewhere like a Majorcan bar on a big screen next summer! (or wherever!?)

The cost of flights and digs in Rio iz said to top £7,000! az aa speak!---so mebeez it's just az well that aa just follow 'The Toon'!

'The Toon's next game iz of course on Saturday when we play 'The Liverbirds' and we can anly hope that they are not az 'lively' az they were last season when they hammered us 6-0 at St James'!
More to follow on this in the build up to the game in the next couple of days!

ENGLAND POLEAXED!

Posted '1:15pm bells' Tuesday 15th October 2013

"IZ THAT THE TYNE BRIDGE?"

We don't normally comment on England games, but the decision to give Poland 18,000 tickets for toneets match at Wembley in the vital World Cup qualifier iz utter madness!

Crowd safety concerns are given az the reason but with 18,000 plus Poles mixin' with 70,000 plus English, it iz surely a recipe for disaster in more ways than one!

I will be listenin' intentleee on mee truck radio toneet az aa travel doon to the Bormingham area once again, to see if we qualify!---or not az the case may be!  

JoeKanory*** THE CLOWN PR*CK OF SOCCER!

Posted '8:38pm bells' Sunday 13th October 2013

"YI COULDN'T MAKE IT UP!"

News reaches' The Geordie Times' aboot a bizarre event that took place @ St Andrews, Birmingham the othaa week, when wor 'Director of Fools' JoeKanory went to watch a Championship match.
Apparentleee, (we are told) he waz very impressed with a Birmingham defender and enquired aboot him to manager Lee Clark!

"Who's that young kid at the back who waz playin' for you today, we certainly would be interested in signin' him!", JoeK said to Lee after the game.
Clarkie torned roond in disbelief and replied: "Actually!---He's on loan to us from YOU!---His name is Shane Ferguson!"

KICKIN' WOR HEELS AGAIN!

Posted '1:15pm bells' Saturday 12th October 2013

For the 2nd week oot of the last three, we find worsels with ne Premyaa Leegue game due to the World Cup qualifyin' games bein' played this week!

This meeenz aa must get 'mee fix' somewhere and today a'm off to a fave non leegue haunt of Federation Park, Dunston (or shud that be The Federation Park CLUBHOOSE?) where 'The Bad Blue Boys' (Dunston UTS) take on Morpeth Toon in a Northern Leegue encoonaa @ '3 bells', where a near 200 crowd iz expected! <(so get there orly!)


Of course it reeely iz annoyin' to have anotha blank weekend again, especially az we will have to travel to Swanzee and Norwich in midweek later on this season! (just HOW de they work the fixtures oot, to make us travel SO far through the week!?)

Anyway!---we haven't got a game til next Saturday now, when 'The Liverbirds' visit St James' Park in a live telly game!

More to follow on this next week sometime!

PS: Dunston are currently the 20th best supported north east club ---full 'Top 20' list to follow later!

Updated '11:00 am bells' Sunday
PPS: Dunston won 5-0 and were 3 up after just 15 minutes with the goals comin' @ 'The (now demolished) Dunston Rocket End' <(now renamed 'The Dunston Rocketless End'!)

Two forthaa goals followed in the 2nd period @ 'The Dunston Tea-hut Terrace End'!---and 'The Geordie Times' prediction of a near 200 crowd waz 'spot on' az 195 diehards actually torned up in the freeezin' conditions!

"TWENTY'S PLENTY!"

Posted '2:40pm bells' Thorsday 10th October 2013

News reaches us that NUFC are puttin' forward a plan to charge away fans just £20 a ticket!---provided!--- wor opponents agree to de the same when we play at their place!

IF? this iz true then it iz great news for fans who are continually bein' ripped off with soarin' ticket prices!

Perhaps they can de the same with train fares az well!------
A'v just booked mee tickets to Sporz at nearly FIFTY QUID DOON and FORTY FIVE QUID BACK!------THAT'S! nearly A HUNDRED QUID for 2nd class retorn tickets to 'the smoke', booked a month in advance!

'THEATRE OF MUPPETS' TIME CHANGE! *** 'THE ARSE' TIME CHANGE! ***

Posted '1:40pm bells' Wednesday 9th October 2013

"WELCOME TO OLD TRAFFORD!"

"GEORDIE TIMES NEWSFLASH!

Wor leegue game @ 'The Theatre of Muppets' against 'The Cockney Reds of Salford' on Saturday December 7th will now kick off @ '12:45 bells' for live telly! (BT)

This meeenz that (once again!) I will have to rush straight for the '6 bells' train after finishin' neetshift @ '4 am bells' (I did the same for Villa away!) Ne sleep again for the fainthearted! "ZZZZZzzzzz!!!!!" <(NOT!)

Wor home game against 'The Arse' iz now @ '1:30 bells' on Saturday 29th December (SKY) and wor game @ Swanzee, pencilled in for Wednesday 4th December haz aalso been picked for live transmission @ '7:45 bells' (BT) (Kick off time unchanged)



REMEMBER!---yi read this news forst in 'The Geordie Times' and ne where else!