THE TOON 2 THE TOFFEE NOSES 1

Posted '9:50 pm bells' 'Bonfire Neet' 2011

The unbeaten run just gans on! and on! and on! az we beat a very resiliant Everton 2-1 at St James' today.

A pin point cross from Danny Simpson in the 12th minute had the Toffees defence panickin' and John Heitinga vollied into his aan net @ The Gallowgate End to give us the lead!

Wor lead waz then doubled when Ryan Taylor hit a wonderous shot off the crossbar which reboonded into the visitors goal to send the 50,000 plus crowd into delerium (er!--apart from the Evertonion contingent-- that iz!)

The 'mickey mousers' then pulled one back, 'deed on half time' when Jack Rodwell levelled with a 'free heeder' at 'The Leazes End' in front of their near 3,000 fans in 'Level 7'

It was 'aall hands to the pump' in the second period az the visitors went aall oot for the equaliser, but The Toon managed to 'haad oot' and we secured wor seventh win of the season to move up (briefly!) to second place in the premya leegue table! ( Man U beat the SMB's 1-0 a couple of hours later to regain second spot!)
We are now THIRD (again!) and the 'party' continued well into the night with fireworks displays aall ower Tyneside to celebrate another win! (nothin' to de with 'Guy Fawkes' of course!)
Attendance: 50,671 (nearly 3,000 Evertonians)

The '100 pub crawl challenge' started off disastrously when the forst boozer we tried to visit wasn't open till '12 bells' (The Enigma!) and the second (Linekers) was aallso closed (permanently!) so we were telt!  
Wor thord on the list (Number 28 Bar) was aalso shut! (god help us!) so we had to 'slum it' in 'The Black Garter' to eventually de wor forst pub of the day @ '11:30 bells'!


The anly otha boozer we managed to visit before the match waz 'The Irish Club' where we bumped into a few aad scouse mates who were up from Morseyside for the game!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

'The 100 pub crawl challenge' continued after the game and several new 'waaterin' holes' were added to 'the list'! (will update 'the list' tomorrow!---or when aa sober up!)

THE TOON v THE TOFFEE NOSES

Posted '9:00 am bells' Saturday 5th November, 2011

"NO!---NOT THAT! ENIGMA!"

We face the toffee noses of Everton @ '12:45 bells' today in wot will be wor sixth, 'live on the telly' game, of the season.
We are lookin' to extend wor unbeaten record to FOURTEEN premya leegue games and 188 days and this bonfire day extraveganza iz sure to be a lively affair with plenty of 'fireworks' guaranteed @ St James'!
If? we win, we will gan up to SECOND PLACE! in the table for two hours at least! (Man U play the SMB's @ '3 bells', so second place cud be short lived!) 


'The Geordie Times 100 pub crawl challenge' starts off @ 'The Enigma' near to the old Worswick Street Bus Station today @ '11 bells' and yer aall  welcome to join us @ 'pub number 33'

Match and 'pub crawl' report to follow much later az per usual!

NUFC RECORD BREAKERS!

Posted '1:00 pm bells' Friday 4th November 2011

A'v been traalin' through the record books to see the best undefeated sequences in the clubs history, to match the six month sequence we have at the moment.
And I have to tell yooo!--- that the current unbeaten run in the league iz wor!----- LANGEST EVER! since we joined the Futbaall League way back in 1893!

The top three sequences are az follows:

1: May 2nd 2011 to date*****
187 days unbeaten in the league (and coontin'!)

2: May 1st 1994 to October 28th 1994****
181 days unbeaten in the league

3: April 16th 1950 to October 6th 1950***
174 days unbeaten in the league

FAIRS CLUB @ HOWDEN TONEET!

Posted '1:15 pm bells' Thorsday 3rd November 2011

The annual meetin' of the Fairs Cup winnin' team of 1969 takes place toneet @ The Howden Club near Waallsend.
'The Fairs Club' event iz a selloot as usual and haz been organised by Bill Gibbs (az usual!)
Iz it reeely 42 YEARS since we last won a major trophy!?

WHEN IRISH 'WHEY AYE'S' ARE SMILIN'!

Posted '9:30 pm bells'  Wednesday 2nd November 2011


THE SIGN SAYS---"GUINNESS IS GOOD FOR YOU!"


'The Geordie Times' haz just had it's FIVE HUNDREDTH hit today from the Republic of Ireland and they are second oweraall in the overseas 'hit list' behind the USA---Have a 'pint of the black and white stuff' on me lads and lasses!---
"Whey aye maan!"----"Cheers!"

WE FORGOT THAT YOU WERE HERE!

Posted '3:15 pm bells' Wednesday 2nd November 2011

Both Man City and Man U away tickets are now sold oot!---For both games we have taken wor MINIMUM! allocation of tickets!, SO!--- instead of havin' aroond 4,000 at each game, we will have!---wait for it!---just 1,700 fans @ Man City and 1,800 fans @ Man U!---a DISGRACEFUL state of affairs when we could easily have sold 4,000 for each game!---wot the hell's the club playin' at????

'GEORDIE TIMES' total pageviews---17,340

Alexa Traffic Rank 24,046,172

For some reason unbeknown to 'man or beast', the 'hit' coonta in the reet hand side-bar isn't workin' for some reeeders!? so! until the problem iz solved aa'll post the 'hits' at the top of the page!
Meanwhile!---Wor 'Google' 'Alexa Traffic Rank has went up 39,254 places to 24,046,172 oot of the 156,000,000 websites aroond the globe!

WE'VE EVEN MADE THE FRONT PAGE OF!----- THE 'LONDON' TIMES!

Posted '9:25 pm bells' Tuesday 1st November 2011

WIGAN RESORVES 0 v THE TOON RESORVES 2 (Vuckic,Abeid)---FULL TIME SCORE---

Posted '8:10 pm bells' Tuesday 1st November 2011

ROBIN PARK---WIGAN

THE GOALS!
We took the lead  on the half hour mark when Haris Vuckic hit a powerful shot from 20 yards oot against the run of play
Mehdi Abeid made the points safe with qwaata of an hour to gan, when he hit a belter from the edge of the box, which hit the post before reboondin' into the Wigan net.
Just like the forst team the second string remain unbeaten so far this season after six games played and are 'top 'o' the league'!
Info supplied by text from wor rovin' 'mad-sad groundhoppin' reporters, 'Dave from York and 'Alex of St George'.

Attendance: 150(ish!) (8 Toon fans!---we naa at least 3 of them!)

HAT-TRICK OR TREAT!---THE PULLIS PLASTIC P*SS POTS 1 THE TOON 3

Posted '1:15 pm bells' Tuesday 1st November 2011

THE COLONEL ISN'T DEED!

The unbeaten league run just gans on and on and aa have to tell you that we would have been VERY HAPPY to have come away from the Britannia Stadium with a point from this hallo'ween fixture, so to come yem with aall THREE points iz a 'TREAT'!---

the story unfolds below!

Three of us travelled doon in 'The Batmobile' namly, me, The Bear' and 'The Caped Crusader' who was the chauffeur and we arrived in good time for a few 'gargels' in The Plough Motel which is one of the very few bars within strikin' distance of the groond.
The 'liquid lubrications' were canny cheeep but the doonside was that they were in F*****' PLASTIC POTS! which iz very appropriate az Stoke are naan az 'The Potters' ('The Plastic Potters' perhaps?)

"NE PROPA GLASSES IN HERE!" ^

Then a miracle happened!---NO!---they didn't start sorvin' the beer oot of 'propa glasses'!---the miracle was that 'The Colonel' then waalked through the door!
'The Colonel', you see, is 'the spit' of 'Gadaffi' and he hails from Bracknall in Berkshire and NOT! Tripoli!
"They killed one of my 'doubles'!" he said az he sat doon to disbelivin' stares from the Stoke fans present!---addin' that he'd managed to escape on one of his camels through the Sahara Desert!

Anyway!---after a canny few 'plastic pintas' it was time for the 'route march' to the groond which iz a good twenty five minutes away at fast waalkin pace!
And did you naa that there isn't ONE other boozer on the entire route!, (aall uphill!) via the flyover ower the 'A500' duel carraigeway, through some derelict buildin's, alang a weed strewn path, and then up a flight of stairs, ower a canal and then ower another flyover, before eventually reachin' the away tornstiles!---"pant! pant! pant!" (meks you glad we are blessed with a groond in the city centre--doesn't it?)

Wearin' wor 'Aall Blacks' change strip, we took the lead in the 12th minute when Gabriel Obertan crossed for Demba Ba to heed home at the Boothen End (the far end from us)
We doubled wor lead some 5mins before the interval when Ba then got his 2nd with a shot from close in, to send the 1,500 or so Toon fans wild!


"A TASTE OF THEIR OWN MEDICINE!"

As we had a two goal cushion we played Stoke at their own 'lang throw in game' when Ryan Taylor asked the baall boys for a towel before launchin  'Delap' type throw ins, much to the annoyance of Pullis's Potters! and delight of The Toon management!---BRILLIANT TACTICS!

Stoke pulled one back with a dodgy lookin' penalty after 'Beanpole Crouch' went doon like 'a sack of taaties' in the box after an innocuous challenge from Ba.
The points were sealed however within a few minutes when a similar situation happened in wor box and Demba Ba comleted his 'Hat-Trick and Treat' by hammerin' the baall home in front of the delerious Toon fans, includin' 'The Colonel'

SOMEWHERE AT THE BACK OF THE AWAY END!
---"TOON ARMY!"

Steven Taylor, incidentleee wore a protective PLASTIC mask---very appropriate for this 'hallo'ween' encoonter!

This win teks us up to the 'dizzy heights' of THORD PLACE! above Chelsea and just ONE POINT behind 2nd placed Man U.
Shud we beat Everton in the orly '12:45 bells' Saturday kick off ,we will actually gan up to SECOND PLACE for two hours at least! (Man U play the SMB's at '3 bells'!)

Attendance: 26,564 (1,500 Toon fans)

PS  In less than one hours time, The Toons 2nd string are playin' @ Robin Park, Wigan against Wigan resorves---a groond we've been te before!
However!--At least THREE 'mad-sad groundhoppers' will be there to represent us!----Dave from York, Alex of St George and Glennn from Ashington!--------match report to follow