GATESHEED REDHEUGH 0 WALKERGATE XI 2 *** NORTHERN ALLIANCE DIVISION 3

Eslington Park, Teams, Gateshead

Date of First Visit: Saturday 2nd August 2025

Gateshead Redheugh 1957  0   Walkergate XI  2

Northern Alliance Division 3 (Level 14 in the footbaall pyramid)

Attendance: 25 (Estimated)

REDHEUGH IN THE WHITE SHIRTS, ATTACK ‘THE TOWER BLOCKS END’ DURING THE FORST HALF!

With non of me fave teams in action last Saturday, aa decided to gan to watch a grassroots Northern Alliance game at Haltwhistle Jubilee to continue mee quest to see just how many teams , who play in towns on the banks ‘o’ the Tyne that aa could visit! (Haltwhistle iz on the River South Tyne!)

However! on the day of the game there were black clouds ower towards the west and az Haltwhistle’s groond had nee cover, aa decided not to risk it! (Most Alliance groonds have nee cover)

The weather woz OK on central Tyneside, so aa heeded for Gatesheed Redheugh for their Tyne derby v Walkergate who hail from the east end of Newcasil!

Gatesheed Redheugh iz famous az 'one' Gazza (Paul Gascoinge) started off here, playin for Redheugh Boys Club, before joining NUFC in 1985!

Anyway! the kick off woz billed az ‘2🔔bells’ and I arrived to see the game kick off 5 minutes orly, at precisely 1:55🛎️bells’ instead?

The Eslington Park groond iz simply a grass pitch with a metal fence aroond it, with anly taall trees for cover on 2 sides of the groond (behind the south goal and on one side)--and 2 huge tower blocks at the other end, which dominated the skyline behind the north goal!

By this time the old 'current bun' had made an appearance through the clouds and so aa took shelter beside the trees near the halfway line, az it woz startin to 'heat up' by this time!

It woz aall Walkergate from the start az they attacked 'The Taall Trees End' (sic!) and they took the lead through their number 8 with a fine finish after aboot 15 minutes play!  

WALKERGATE IN THE GREEN STRIP LAY SEIGE TO ‘THE TAALL TREES END’ GOAL!

Redheugh just wornt in it and conceded again when their keeper made a great save, but, unfortunatly for him, the baall fell nicely to Walkergate's number 10 (I Fink?) who scrambled the baall ower the line to double their lead!     

       

It woz aall Walkergate again in the 2nd half az they attacked 'The Tower Blocks End', (wot else?) but they couldn't find a way to forthaa increase their lead!

(Redheugh Park, where Gatesheed FC once played Leegue futbaall, used to be on the other side of the tower blocks, across the duel carriageway) (Now demolished and replaced by a 'Pitz Super Soccer' 5 a side pitches!)

The ref woz fcukin' useless and sent a Redheugh player off for an innocuous challenge late in the game-- and one of the linesmen bellowed oot instructions to the Redheugh team az he ran doon the line!!! (Nee neutrals here!)⬇️

     A REDHEUGH THROW IN ---110% !

In the end it woz an eazy win for 'The Toon East Enders', played in front of approximitleee 25 fans, includin aboot 6 from Walkergate, 5 dogs of various breeds, 4 bairns in pushchairs, 3 blind mice (honest!), 2 cyclists (one of which woz a little kid who furiously peddled hiz little bike aroond the perimiter track several times!) and ONE sendin' off!

                “WHO LET THE DOGS OOT!?”🐕 

      “SPOT THE BIKE!?”

It woz boilin hot by this time and on the final whistle aa heeded for 'The Teams Social Club' up the road, to quensh mee thorst! (Az yih dee!) 

“THE CLUB’S A BIT FAR FROM THE BUS STOP, LIKE!”

NEW GROONDS FOR 'THE NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS'!--"WE'RE GANNIN FOR A GANDER!"

 Posted 'high noon bells' Wedinzday 6th August 2025

THE ARDEN GARAGES STADIUM, STRATFORD TOWN!                                                    "NEW GROOND! NEW GROOND!"

Az we've said many, many times before, The Geordie Times won't speculate on any new arrivals until they are standin in front of  The Trainin groond or The East Stand sign, holdin eethaa a Toon shirt or scarf above their heeds!

We are sick to death of the departure/arrivals speculation and won't comment til it actually happens!

"TO BE OR NOT TO BE! ---(at the game)--THAT IZ THE QUESTION!"

In the MEEEENTIME! the U21 Leegue fixtures have been released and we hear that Bormingham City will play wor U21s at Stratford Town in Stratford Upon Avon the neet before wor 1st team away game at Leeedz!---A nighmare situation az to what to dee and how to get to both games!? (Stratford game on Friday August 29th at '7 bells' and Leeedz on Saturday the 30th at '5:30 bells' for live telly!)

William Shakespeare, born in Stratford Upon Avon

"GANNIN FOR A 'GANDER' DOON THE GREEN!"

Then we see that Crystal Palace U21s will play at former Leegue 2 Sutton United's groond!---NUFC U21s are due to play there on Munday Octobaa 27th) They play at Ganders Green Lane

Then of course we have a trip to Evaatin's new abode at The Dickheed Stadium (or whatever its caalled?) at the end of Novembaa!

NOT forgettin possible new groonds in The Champions Leegue az well!---Happy times for The mad-sad groundhoppers!

 

SPORZ 1 THE TOON 1 *** ASIAN TOUR 2025

 Posted (from) 'high noon bells' (onwards) Munday 4th July 2025

A CHOICE OF 3 TELLYS TO WATCH THE GAME IN ‘THE STACK’ WITH SJP IN THE BACKGROOND ABOVE!

The final game of the Asian tour ended 1-1 v Sporz in The Seoul World Cup Stadium in Soooth Korea!

The Geordie Times watched the game in The Stack in the forst half and The Irish Club in the 2nd half!

There were aboot 250 present in The Stack az the game kicked off and within 2 minutes we fell behind when Jacob Murphy lost possesion in hiz own half and Brennen Johnson hit a lowish shot from the edge of the box, which deflected off Dan Burn and into the net! GREAT START! 1-0 to them!

A FAN WITH A BUGLE!      ⬆️                                      

 

In the 17th minute at the other end Anthony Gordon nearly equalised when hiz shot went narrowly wide of the goal!

Just 1 minute before that 'Fab' Schar had a shot that just went ower the bar and then Joelinton missed an eazy heeded chance from a Bruno cross!

A FAN WITH A FAN!  (FAR RIGHT!)⬆️

The Pope made a fine save when Mathys Tel woz put clean through, but Pope stuck oot a leg and stopped the shot!

The equaliser came in the 35th minute when Gordon passed to Harvey Barnes and he hit a sweet shot past Kinsky in the Sporz goal

HT 1-1   In total The Geordie Times team (me!) wandered aboot The Stack and saw the game on 4 different tellys, makin me a very reeel 'NUFC mad-sad Tellyhopper!'

TELLY NUMBER 4! 🤪👍🏁🏆🥇

The Geordie Times ⬆️ then moved on to The Irish Club next to The Chinaatoon Arch for the 2nd half!---In the 50th minute, Anthony Gordon shud have put us aheed but hiz shot just from close in just missed the goalpost after Matt 🎯 Targett had put him through!

TELLY NUMBER 5 IN ‘THE IRISH CLUB’

In the final minute of the game, Bruno shot just ower the bar from a fine dribble from new boy Park Seung-Soo, who had put him through!  FT 1-1 (Nee penalties to decide the winner)

Attendance: Estimated 250 in The Stack and 5 watchin in The Irish Club! (there were 10 others not watchin at aall!?)

In total The NUFC mad-sad Tellyhoppers watched the 3 Asian Tour games on 8 (EIGHT!) different tellys in 4 locations! Wonderbar in The Gate, Shearer’s Bar under The Gallowgate End, a secret location hoose on a dodgy pirate 🏴‍☠️ firestick, The Stack near SJP and finally The Irish Club near Chinaatoon!

The NUFC mad-sad Tellyhoppers rule OK! 🤪👍🏁🏆🥇

Attendance at the game itself: 64,773

Loads of pix from wor intrepid 'Geordie Times' Toon Travellers 'Paul the Englishman' and 'International Russ-cue'!

And a crazy video!⬇️

Pix taken at the actual match⬇️ and aroond the groond!⬇️

EATIN NOODLES WITH CHOPSTICKS!?

THE TOON V SPORZ *** ASIAN TOUR FINAL GAME ON SUNDAY

 Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Saturday 2nd August 2025

THE CHIMNEY PUB, SEOUL, SOOOTH KOREA (SPECIAL THANX TO******** ‘INTERNATIONAL RUSS-CUE’ FOR THE PHOTOS)

The Toon play wor final away game in pre season tomorrow dinnaatime (high noon 🕛 bells 🔔) az speculation moonts az to the whereaboots of a certain number 14 NUFC player!???

We will NOT speculate until it’s cast in stone exactly wots gannin on!

Meeenwhile there’s the little  matter of wor game in Seoul, Sooth Korea!

The Geordie Times will be ‘Tellyhoppin’ once again (for the very last time this pre season) somewhere in The Toon tomorrow afternooon!

The Geordie Times will be at AALL of wor competitive games this season, includin aall The Champions Leegue away games—wherever they may be! (We simply couldn’t afford to gan on the Asian tour az well!)

Az per usual, watch this space for ‘The NUFC mad-sad Tellyhoppers’ match report sometime on Munday!

UPDATED SUNDAY MORNING

OOTSIDE THE STADIUM!

INSIDE THE STADIUM!  

TEAM K LEEGUE OF SOOOTH KOREA 1. THE TOON 0 *** ASIAN TOUR

 Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Thorzday 31st July 2025

A NUFC MAD-SAD TELLYHOPPERS VIEW OF THE SUWAN WORLD CUP STADIUM

“KO’D BY THE K LEEGUE!”

In 33 degrees heat NUFC lost 1-0 to a team from the Soooth Korea K Leegue in The Suwan World Cup Stadium!

JUST BEFORE THE KICK OFF. PIC FROM ‘INTERNATIONAL RUSS-CUE’

Watchin the game from a secret location on a pirate 🏴‍☠️ fire 🔥 stick, aa missed nearly half an hour of the game coz aa couldn’t find the reet channel! A frantic phone caall to Mark Mini Mags, who told me to gan to ‘JP IPTV’ ‘game 02’ which said Barnet v Newport? Aa logged in and hay presto wor game came on!???

“NOW WHERE THE HELL IZ BARNETvNEWPORT?🤔

A’d anly been watchin for a couple of minutes to see a Korean player waltz through wor defence and fire a shot past The Pope in The Toon goal to put us 1-0 behind! HT 1-0 doon!

PAUL THE ENGLISHMAN’S VIEW ⬆️

MAD-SAD TELLYHOPPERS VIEW! ⬆️

We had a couple of chances in but he 2nd half through Osalu and Gordon, but we didn’t have a killer striker like the one who didn’t travel to Asia and who allegedly haz downed tools for hiz dream move to a certain club in north west Ingerland! (I Fink yoo naa who I mean!?)

TERRA TINS ON THE TERRACES!🍺🍺🍺🍺

Anyway! we just couldn’t find a way to get the equaliser and suffered wor 3rd defeat in a row this pre season!

To make matters worse the picture froze near the end of the game and when it ‘unfroze’ a couple of minutes later, Joe Willock woz lying on a stretcher and carried off!

Wor paper thin squad iz even thinner now!🙈

Attendance in the secret location hoose: Very, very few!

TOON SECTION MATCH TICKET

Sporz are next in Seoul on Sunday in another high noon bells kick off!

Watch this space to see just where The NUFC mad-sad Tellyhoppers watch THIS game! (3 different tellys in 2 games!) Wonderbar, Shearer’s Bar and The Secret Location Hoose!

Special thanx to ‘Paul the Englishman’ and ‘International Russ-cue’ for the pix from Asia so far!