THE ORIGINAL GEORDIE TIMES *** RIP MALLA! (LOST BUT NOT FORGOTTEN)

Reposted '6:00pm bells' Tuezday 11th February 2025               (1st published in 2011)

RIP MALLA🪦---THE ORIGINAL GEORDIE TIMES EDITOR!

THE GEORDIE TIMES (an explanation) (1st published in 2011)

< Many many moons ago a group of intrepid Geordies heeded for ‘The Smoke’ (London) in search of graft

They consisted of painters, decorators, plumbers, brickies and plonkies! and they based themsels in the Shepherds Bush and Hammersmith area’s of west London

One of their number, namely, ‘Malla’ (wheeze keys Clayton) had a ‘brainwave’ one day (or should that be ‘brainWARP’?) and decided tih de a twice fortnightly newspaper (as opposed to once a week!) aboot the ‘exploits’ of this incandesant clan (whatever that meeenz?) in cartoon form and caalled it ‘The Geordie Times’

NOT exactly in the ‘Auf Wiedersehen Pet!’ mould, of Jimmy Nail and Dennis, they were more like the, ‘Auf To ‘The Smoke’ Pet!’ ‘mould’ of Laurel and Hardy!

In total ten issues were published on a clapped oot photo copier and it carried on until they eventually got homesick and came back ‘yem’ to work and sadly this scurrilous publication ceased production.---

UNTIL!----

In 1995 aa decided to de a fanzine of the same name and two issues were published before ‘time was caalled’ as it was too much hassle sellin’ them and (more importantlee!) it wasted valuable drinkin’ time in the process!

HOWEVER!---

Aa was asked by Newcastle United programme editor, one ‘Jethro’ Tully to de the fan page in the match programme for season 2005-2006 which was caalled ‘FINK THE FAN’.

It was a great success but unfortunately because of ‘budget cuts’ the fan page was axed and replaced by a page of adverts!?

Many fans have commented just how much they liked and enjoyed the stories so a’ve decided to rezzarect ‘The Geordie Times’ for a thord time and publish mee aan away match reports from the past and the present, as in the programme

Frequency of  'The Geordie Times Online'
1: Visit to a new ground (compulsary!)
2: When sommik gans competleee wrang (quite often!)
3: When 'The Toon' win a 'major'? trophy (very rarely!)

At least ONE story per new groond will be included and as a’v been to ower 270 groonds to watch The Toon it will tek iz quite a lang time to ‘de them aall’ (Now 372 groonds in 2025)

<(Many many moons infact!)

No stone will be left untorned (I repeat!) No! stone! will be left untorned in our quest to give our huge and loyal reeedership the quality production that they dizorve (aall ten of you!)

(Now 500 plus per day on average)

‘The Geordie Times’ has been re-born yet again and the rest (as they say!) is historeeee!

Cheers!

©Fink™ (the mad-sad gr☺undh☺pper!) 

We have just foond oot that Malla sadly died 2 weeks ago and he will be greatly missed by aall who knew him! 

RIP OLD MATE!🪦



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"COME IN NUMBER 9!"

 Posted ‘7:00pm 🛎️bells’ Munday 10th February 2025

The draw for the FA Cup 5th roond tex place in just a few minutes on The ‘One Show’ on BBC1!

NUFC are baall number 9 and the best case synario iz a HOME draw against a lower Leegue side-- and the worst case synario iz an away game at Plymith, Brightin, Bournemooth, Exeter or yet anothaa London away day!

The anly place left where 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have never seen wor 1st team play iz Millwaall's New Den, although we HAVE seen wor youth team play there before!

Keep your fingers🤞 (and toes!🦶crossed for a game at SJP!

The Geordie Times will publish wor opponents az soon az we find oot in a few minutes time!

"Watch this space!👇---Watch this space!👇

NUFC ARE AT HOME TO BRIGHTIN!🤪👍🏁

HALLELUJAH! JOHN TUDOR! JOHN TUDOR! RIP🪦

 Posted ‘high noon bells’ 🔔 Munday 10th February 2025

For the 3rd time in just a couple of weeks another former NUFC star player haz passed away! (Alang with Alan Shoulder and Gordon Marshall)

This time it’s prolific striker John Tudor who famously partnered Supermac back in the 1970s!

In total he made 220 appearances and scored 73 goals! It should have been 74 but hiz spectacular divin heeder v Forest in the infamous FA Cup tie in 1974 woz expunged from the record books because of the riot which stopped the game! (See top photo)

NUFC won 4-3 but the FA ordered that the game should be replayed because of the ‘said’ riot!

RIP 🪦 John. Lost but not forgotten!

THE BRUMMIE BLUE NOSES 2. THE TOON 3 *** FA CUP 4th ROOND

 Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Sunday 9th February 2025 ( on the train back!)

THE RUSSIAN LINESMAN MARK 2!

There woz total chaos az we tried to get to the tornstiles az the 5,000 Toon fans were forced to gan through 2 narrow entrances to get searched!

We eventually got in to witness a crap 💩 light show where they switch the lights off and on like in a neet club disco, firework 🧨 display which went doon like a damp squid, flame 🔥throwers and some absolutely terrible hip hop ‘none music’ played at full blast ower the loudspeakers! And I thought I woz gannin to a futbaall match!???

‘Steady Eddie’ had made 9 changes from the team that beat The Arseholes 2-0 through the week and we paid a heavy price for that within a minute of the kick off!

The Brummie fans were really up for it az they created a ‘bear pit’ atmosphere! We hardly had time to draw breath before the forst goal woz scored after aboot 45 seconds, when a terrible mix up in the Toon  defence let in Laird, who tapped the baall ower the line to put the Leegue 1 side 1-0 up from a corner kick!—Great start!

Bormingham had a chance not lang after to double their lead, but fluffed their lines when a gappin goal chance went abeggin!

And then in the 22nd minute az we attacked the far goal from us, controversy unfolded when a Joe Willock shot went close and az the game continued the linesman on the right hand side of the pitch told the ref that Willock’s shot HAD crossed the goal line!—and the goal woz given to the astonishment of the Toon fans who then celebrated wildly after a brief silence!

Az the still picture below shows the baall defiantly DIDN’T cross the line and we had ‘got oot of jail’! (Shades of the Russians linesman in the 1966 World Cup final, for Geoff Hurst’s 3rd goal, which hit the bar and bounced off the goal line!)

THIER GOALIE WOZ BEHIND THE LINE BUT THE BAALL WASZZINT!

5minutes later and NUFC went 2-1 up when a Livramento cross eventually foond Callum Wilson and stroked the baall into the net!

Not to be outdone The Blue Noses equalised in the 40th minute when Iwata hit an unstoppable shot past The Pope in the Toinvgial from 25 yards oot! HT 2-2!

After a few scares in 2nd period and after a lang wait while a Brummie player woz stretched off with a bad leg injury, we finally made the final breakthrough when it looked like the game would gan to dreaded extra time!

Joe Willock latched onto a Longstaff baall and from a tight angle, put hiz shot through their goalie’s legs and into the the net with 8 minutes left on the clock, much to the relief of the Toon faithful and players alike!

Due to the bad injury mentioned 12 minutes added time woz played and after a couple of scares, when Pope made good saves the ref finally blew for full time az we aall celebrated!

Attendance: 27,994 ((5,000 relieved Toon fans!—many who had missed the kick off and the first goal, due to the chaotic entry to the away end!)

The draw for this he 5th roond tex place on ‘The One Show’ at 7:10pm 🛎️s onwards on BBC1 on Munday neet!

PS: This woz wor SIXTH away win in a row in 3 different competitions!

PUB CRAWL PHOTOS! 

4 this time! (Runnin' total for season 58 different drinkin dens)

YORK STATION ON THE WAY TO BIRMINGHAM!

THE WELLY BIRMINGHAM 👆👇

             

One of wor company who shall remain nameless caalled Graham, bought a bottle of Becks in ‘The Welly’ and woz ower the moon that it woz anly £2.50 (Normally £5 a bottle!). ‘Ower the moon’—-until!—one of the lads pointed to the bottom of the label where it said ‘Alcohol free’!  He woz not a ‘happy bunny’ to say the least!😂

a 

NEWALL STREET TAVERN BIRMINGHAM

QUEENS ARMS BIRMINGHAM 👇👆

THE BRUMMIE BLUE NOSES V THE TOON *** FA CUP 4th ROOND ••• TEATIME TODAY!

 Posted ‘9:00am🔔 bells’ Saturday 8th February 2025

The cup games are comin up thick and fast az we move switch from Leegue Cup on Wedinzday to FA Cup today!

We are on the train to Bormingham where we play The Blue Noses at ‘5:45 🛎️s’ at St Andrews!

Aall 5,000 ticket were snapped up straight away and the game iz a complete selloot! (29,000 me Finx?🤔)

Divvint naa what strength side ‘Steady Eddie’ will play, but it should be strong enough to see off the Leegue 1 side! (Famous last words!)

A full Geordie Times match report will appear sometime on Sunday!

APU “Watch this space!”

10th TIME LUCKY?

 Posted ‘3:00pm 🔔bells’ Friday 7th February 2025

THE LAST TIME WE WERE HERE 2 YEARS AGO!

So it’s The Liverbirds who we will meet in The Leegue Cup final on Sunday March 16th at Wembley!

Wembley really iz an unlucky groond for NUFC az we have lost wor last NINE competitive games there since 1974! (This doesn’t include the ridiculous Futbaall Leegue Centenary Tournament in 1988 when we played 20 minutes each way v Livaapool (won) and Tranmere (lost!)

The sorry tales of woe are az follows! ( And The Geordie Times woz at each and every one of them!🥶)

1974 FA Cup final. LOST!

1976 Leegue Cup final. LOST!

1996 Charity Shield. LOST!

1998 FA Cup final. LOST!

1999 FA Cup final. LOST!

2000 FA Cup semi final. LOST!

2023 Leegue Cup final. LOST!

Plus 2 Premyaa Leegue games v Sporz, who played there while their new stadium woz gettin built.   LOST! LOST!

We were underdogs in every one of those games—and guess what?—we will be underdogs again v Livaapoool!

BUT! If we can play like we did against The Arseholes, then there iz nee reason why we cannit break this ‘jinx’ and lift wor forst domestic trophy for 70 years!

KEEP THE FAITH!

HOWAY THE LADS!🤪👍🏁

RIP GORDON AND ROGER! 🪦

 Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Friday 7th February 2025

Former Toon Goalie from the 1960s Gordon Marshall and former NUFC London Supporters Club Chairman Roger Douglass have both passed away!

Gordon woz the forst Toon goalie I saw, when startin’ to gan to games in the 1960s!

I met Roger loads of times at London away games, although I never knew hiz name, he woz very tall and a fanatical Toon fan!

I never saw hiz familiar face this season and wondered why?

Sadly I now hear he had cancer and died a couple of weeks ago!

RIP LADS! 🪦 Lost but not forgotten!

THE TOON 2 THE ARSEHOLES 0 LEEGUE CUP SEMI FINAL 2nd LEG (AGGREGATE SCORE 4-0 TO THE TOON!)

 Posted 'high noon bells' Thorzday 6th February 2025

"IT MUST BE THE BAALL!"

An absolutleee brilliant performance in an absolutleee brilliant atmosphere rattled The Arse and from the 'off' NUFC were on the front foot az we attacked The Leazes goal!

And it didnt tek lang for us to score the forst 'goal'

Alexander the Great ran through The Arse defence and hit a superb shot past in the visitors goal to put us 1-0 up after just 4 minutes on the clock!----Az we celebrated wildly we could see the ref holdin' the baall and not retornin it to the centre spot for the restart!?

A very lang VAR check followed and eventually the ref comunicated that Isak woz offside and the goal woz chalked off! FCUK VAR!

However, that didnt disheartern The Toon and in the 20th minute Isak again ran through their defence and hit a rocket shot which reboonded off the goal frame to Jacob Murphy and he hit the baall forst time into the net and this time the goal stood! 1-0 to us and 3-0 on aggregate from the 1st leg!

The Arse aalso had chances and just before Murphy's goal when 'mystery man'? (can't remember who?) shaved the post, but we held on to the half time break with that precious 3 goal advantage!

Not lang after the restart Anthony Gordon hit a lang shot with their goalie way off hiz line, but hiz effort just missed the post to large groans from the crowd!

But the final nail in The Arseholes ⚰️coffin came just after this in the 52nd minute, when their goalie Raya attempted a pass to Rice, but Fab Schar dispossed him and the baall fell to Gordon who squeezed the baall just inside the far Gallowgate post to put us 2-0 up and 4-0 up on aggregate!

At this point there looked nee way back for the 'norf Landaners' az the clocked ticked doon and the crowd started singin that, "Tell mee maa me maa!", Wembley song alang with, "It must be the ball, Mikel Arteta , it must be the ball!", in reference to The Arses managers 1st leg comments that the ball used woz different to the Premyaa Leegue ball and that 'the flight' woz different and thats why they lost---(The excuse of aall the excuses!)

We saw the game oot and there woz mass celebrations at the final whistle!---"Wembley oh lay oh lay oh lay!" (For the 2nd time in 3 years!) v The Liverbirds! (just watched them hammer Sporzy!)

Attendance: 52,173  4,883 Arseholes! (Az aa waited in the queue to get in, some Arsehole fans waalkin past me were arrogantly singin', "We're gonna win three nil!" (Would have loved to have seen those tossers after the game!)😂

NUFCs official website published this last neet!👇🤪👍🏁🏟️

               THE CULPRIT! 👆

Footnote: A lot of Toon fans thought that we would lose after  The Arse demolished champions Man City 5-1 at the weekend, and one of mee mates who shall remain nameless caalled jimmy sent me a text sayin' "Be afraid, be VERY afraid!"😧 (Oh yee of little faith!)

THE TOON V THE ARSEHOLES *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI FINAL 2nd LEG

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 🛎️ bells’ Wedinzday 5th February 2025

THE SIGN SAYS THAT THERE IZ AN ‘EVENT’ AT SJP TOONEET!—I WONDER WOT EVENT THAT COULD BE!?🤔

NUFC gan into wor biggest game of the season with a 2 goal advantage from the 1st leg in ‘norf Landan’!

We havvint played well in wor last 2 home games, while The Arse demolished champions Man City 5-1 at the weekend, so it isn’t a foregone conclusion that we will make the Wembley final next month!?

If we score orly then it could be tie over— BUT if we concede orly then the jitters might follow and anything could happen after that!

Joelinton iz a huge doubt az he haz been seen in a leg brace, Callum Wilson (remember him?) could be ion the subs bench if needed!? (But divvint haad yih breath!😵)

IF we win then we will play eethaa Sporz or The Liverbirds in the final!

They play tomorrow neet and Sporz won the 1st leg 1-0 at home!

It would of course be better if we played Sporz at Wembley, az they are the easier option (on paper!📝)

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Thorzday!  Let’s hope (and pray 🙏🏻) it’s a ‘good one’!?

ALAN SHOULDER RIP 🪦

 Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Munday 3rd February 2025

More very sad news that former Toon centre forward Alan Shoulder haz passed away reaches us!

Believe it or not, he worked doon the pit at Blyth and played for them in their famous FA Cup run of 1978, when Northern Leegue Blyth reached the 5th roond of the FA Cup! (losin' narrowly to Wrexham in a replay at SJP in front of more than 42,000!---Includin 'not so little old me'!)

After that he signed for NUFC for a reported £20,000 and scored a total of  38 goals in 127 appearances for us!

I saw hiz forst ever goal in a Toon top at Fulim when NUFC won 3-1 in 1978– We were late to the game and missed THREE orly goals in the forst half!—-But we DID see Alan Shoulder’s goal in the second half!

We missed the kick off coz we were in a boozer and didn’t realise that the groond woz a canny way away!

We had a few extra ‘Arthur’s’ (Arthur Scargills=gargels=pints) named after the former miners leader in the 1970s, and of course, az mentioned, incidentally, Alan worked doon the mines when he played for The Spartans!

I have ‘dug up’ the match report on that game which woz mee ‘half century’ of groonds visited watchin The Toon! (ground number 50)

See below for the match report of the game 47 years ago!