NUFC FIXTURES 2020-2021

 Posted '6:06pm bells' Thorsday 20th August 2020

The fixtures for the new season have been released and we are NOT playin' Leeedz away az reported by some tosspot!

Wor forst game IZ away, but 200 miles forthaa south, in west London against The Jellied Eels Mob of West Ham!

(Not that we'll be able to gan, like!)

Then wor forst home game v Brightin, which will again be in an empty stadium, followed by anothaa trip to London to face Sporz at their new abode (Thankfully 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' were here last season in wor forst ever visit to Tottenham Hotspor Stadium!)

And then in October, hopefully some fans will be allowed to see wor home games v Bornley and Moan United----But with an estimated 15,000 season ticket holders admitted, just who do they say will be able to attended az we have ower twice that number of ticket holders!?

A Wolves away game follows, but we fear that NEE away fans will be allowed for the foreseeable future! 

PS: Much more to follow when aa get time, like!

21 WEEKS & MORE TWISTS & TURNS!

 Posted '8:00am bells' (@ Ferrybridge, north Yorkshire)

Wedinzday 19th August 2020

Az reported on twitter!

21 weeks and coontin'

🖐🖐🖐🖐☝️

NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS NEAR MISS!

Posted '7:09pm bells' Tuesday 18th August 2020

The draw for the EFL Trophy northern section woz made this afternooon and NUFC U21s will face the first teams of Bolton, Crewe and Shrewsbury, aall away from home!

The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers have been to aall 3 groonds, which is just as well as they are likely to be played behind closed doors!

We could have got Salford away behind closed doors,  a groond where have never seen the Toon play!  It woz a 'near miss'!

This would have been a disaster for aall of us who groundhop with the Toon and the sooner they let fans into games the better!

Dates and times of the above games to be conformed (not that we'll be able to gan, like!)

  

BNG TO SIGN RONALDO!

 Posted '9:22pm bells' Munday 17th August 2020

The BNG consortium say that they are serious bidders for NUFC and have said that they want to sign RONALDO!

Beleeeve that and yoo'll beleeeve that the Moon is made of cheese!

        AND HERE'S THE PROOF!

EFL TROPHY DRAW TOMORROW!

 Posted '8:08pm bells' Munday 17th August 2020

Tomorrow afternooon at '1:30 bells' the group draw for the EFL Trophy will be made on Talksport for the Premyaa Leegue sides who have entered it.

The northern groups have aalready been drawn for the lower leegue minnows (like the smb!)

There are 8 groups in the northern section, with 3 lower leegue clubs in each group, plus an 'invited' club from the Premyaa!

We can't be in group A coz the mackems are in that one and we will be kept apart til the knockoot stage!

Fleetwood are in that group and it's a huge sigh of relief that we wont play them, coz it might still be behind closed doors and 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have never been there before and would miss a new groond, if it woz possible to draw them away!

However!  The anly othaa team in the northern section of the competition where we have never been tee, where we could gan, is Salford, who are in group B

If we draw them away, then there iz a good chance that we wouldn't get in, which would ruin the NUFC groundhoppers new grounds records, (gannin back 41 years in my case!)(Since I missed an NUFC game on a new groond!)

Of course fans might be able to gan to games in the near future, but with the 'bat out of hell' virus still active, this could aall change!

We will let yoo naa just which teams we will be facing as soon az we find oot!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

CAALL MY BLUFF!

 Posted '1:20pm bells' Sunday 16th August 2020

NUFCs wanaaway owner The Fat Controller wants the PIF group to caall the Premyaa Leegue's bluff and gan to arbitration  to finally get the deal ower the line!

Quite simply he wants the PIF to tell them exactly who will be runnin the club to force an end to the saga!

He is sympathetic with their situation and believes that they are the ANLY serious contenders to buy us! (At the moment!)

Arbitration, we are told, is their anly option and could take 1 YEAR!   

But will they be prepared to wait that lang, we ask worsels!???

Watch this space for forthaa developments!

Updated '2:20pm bells'

'WOT! Michael Chopra fronting the deal?   The failed gambler who said that the PIF woz "A done deal!" and who's anly claim to fame iz in a song which ends; "Even Chopra scored!" (When he scored for NUFC in the 4-1 win against the mackems!)

'Fink' I'll phone 'confused.com'????????

PL STIR UP A HORNETS NEST!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Saturday 15th August 2020

The letter from The Premyaa Leegues cheef executive Richard 'Disaster' Masters yesterday (see article below) has certainly stirred up a Hornets nest with the PIF and The Fat Controller!

Below are the replies to his letter!

• Conclusion: It seems that The Premyaa Leegue's stance woz to block the deal, no matter what!
• Have they succeded?   Well it's now up to the PIF consortium to make the next move, but the deal seems ever more unlikely az the weeks pass (20 weeks so far!)

AT LAST! A REPLY FROM THE PL!

 Posted '3:50pm bells' Friday 14th August 2020

Add caption

The letter above is from Richard Masters---but wot the hell does it meen?  That The Fat Controller keeps the 17M?    AND can sell to somebody else?  Wonder wot the PIF will dee next?  Are they 'back on board'?

And why oh why did it take a fans petition which got 110,000 signatures and ower 50 MPs who received ower 7,000 e mails etc, to get the PL to finally reply to the pressure after nearly 20 weeks of exhaustive exasperation?

"I HAVE A DREAM!"

 Posted 11:11am bells' Friday 14th August 2020

*

"ROTTEN EGGS AND TOMATOES AT THE READY!"

MASTERS ISN'T DEAD!

 Posted '11:22am bells' @ Redditch, Thorsday 13th August 2020

Sensational news reaches The Geordie Times aboot the missing Premyaa Leegue cheef executive Richard Masters!

Well! he's came oot of hiding and said that "The season may have finished, but our work doesn't stop! We are working on plans to let fans back into games! We must test and prove what is possible in tandem with the authorities, within a framework that is flexible and can adapt to fast moving circumstances and developing expertise!"

NOWT at aall aboot the 19 week NUFC takeower fiasco!

NOT an effin word!???

Again! watch this space for future developments! (Or not, as the case may be!?)