For aall the latest NUFC fixtures and results so far 'click' onto toolbar above (NUFC 2012-2013 Premier League, European & Cup fixtures)
This website iz dedecated to the Newcastle United groundhoppers who follow the fortunes of the team aroond the world (and beyond!) The ground totals include competitive and friendly forst team, resorve team, junior team and Newcastle United X1 games that 'the mad-sad groundhopper' has attended, aall for Newcastle United games only, in the last SEVEN decades*** cheers!***'Fink' (the mad-sad groundhopper!)***last count 379 (380 inc Motspur Park outside)
Monday, 14 January 2013
NUFC FIXTURES 2012-2013***LATEST UPDATES
Updated '9:25am bells' Monday 14th January 2013
For aall the latest NUFC fixtures and results so far 'click' onto toolbar above
(NUFC 2012-2013 Premier League, European & Cup fixtures)
For aall the latest NUFC fixtures and results so far 'click' onto toolbar above (NUFC 2012-2013 Premier League, European & Cup fixtures)
Sunday, 13 January 2013
THE PERFECT REMY-DY!
Posted '8:00pm bells' Sunday 13th January 2013
"THE FRENCH CONNECTION!"
News reaches 'The Geordie Times' many hours after the event (by homin' pigeon!), that we are (allegedly!) signin' French international striker Loic Remy from Marseille for a reported fee of £8 million and that he iz due on Tyneside in the not too distant future for a medical and contract taalks!
If it's true?, then he will join fellow Frencemen Hatem Ben Arfa, Yohan Cabaye and resent signin' Mathieu Debuchy in 'Toon'
"THE FRENCH CONNECTION!"
If it's true?, then he will join fellow Frencemen Hatem Ben Arfa, Yohan Cabaye and resent signin' Mathieu Debuchy in 'Toon'
DELIA'Z CANARY CUSTARDS 0 THE TOON 0
Updated 9:30pm bells' Sunday 13th January 2013
"YES!---WE HAVE NO BANANAS!"
"WE HAVE NO BANANAS TODAY!"
For the thord weekend in a row we let the train take the strain az we heeded soothbound on the East Coast Mainline, this time to Peterborough and then onward to Norfolk.
Forst port o caall when we arrived @ 'dinnertime bells' waz 'The Murderers Arms' where we (not suprizinglee!) 'murdered' a few pints before heedin' for the away end which waz a qwaata of an hours waalk away.
It haz to be said straight away that this waz yet another dire performance from the black n whites but at least we didn' concede a goal and a point iz better that nowt!
The home side wornt any better and a nil-nil draw was a fair result.
Game highlights?
Forst half: A Obertan shot iz saved by the Custards keeper Bunn at the far end from us---wor anly shot on target in the forst half apart from a 'powder puff' effort from Demba Cisse who played up front on hiz own!
Second half: Yohan Cabaye makes a welcome retorn in the 56th minute, replacin' Obertan who went off in a huff doon the players tunnel!
66th minute: The Custards hit the post through Martin, but thankfully it went oot for a goal kick!
Colloccini (playin' hiz LAST GAME) and Marveaux have 'off target shots' and that's az good az it got for us!
New boy Debuchy haz a quiet game and gets himsel booked near the end!
84th minute: The stadium tannoy annooncer gets it aall wrang and puts a rare smile on wor faces, when he tells us that Anita haz been replaced by!---BigiBANANA! (Bigiramana!)
The home side nearly pinch it in injury time when Pilkington missed an easy heeder!
Results elsewhere meen that we are STILL just two points above the 'abyss' az wor winless away run continues! (Now SEVENTEEN and coontin' in the leegue, the cups and Europe!)
Toon team: Krul, Debuchy, Williamson, Coloccini, Santon, Perch, Anita (Bigibanana! 84), Obertan (Cabaye 57), Marveaux, Gutierrez, Cisse
Attendance: 26,752 (aroond aboot 2,000 Toon faithful!)
"YES!---WE HAVE NO BANANAS!"
"WE HAVE NO BANANAS TODAY!"
 |
| "COMIN' SOON TO 'THE TOON'???" |
For the thord weekend in a row we let the train take the strain az we heeded soothbound on the East Coast Mainline, this time to Peterborough and then onward to Norfolk.
Forst port o caall when we arrived @ 'dinnertime bells' waz 'The Murderers Arms' where we (not suprizinglee!) 'murdered' a few pints before heedin' for the away end which waz a qwaata of an hours waalk away.
It haz to be said straight away that this waz yet another dire performance from the black n whites but at least we didn' concede a goal and a point iz better that nowt!
The home side wornt any better and a nil-nil draw was a fair result.
Game highlights?
 |
| VIEW FROM ROW 'II' (1st HALF) |
Forst half: A Obertan shot iz saved by the Custards keeper Bunn at the far end from us---wor anly shot on target in the forst half apart from a 'powder puff' effort from Demba Cisse who played up front on hiz own!
Second half: Yohan Cabaye makes a welcome retorn in the 56th minute, replacin' Obertan who went off in a huff doon the players tunnel!
 |
| 2nd HALF |
66th minute: The Custards hit the post through Martin, but thankfully it went oot for a goal kick!
Colloccini (playin' hiz LAST GAME) and Marveaux have 'off target shots' and that's az good az it got for us!
New boy Debuchy haz a quiet game and gets himsel booked near the end!
84th minute: The stadium tannoy annooncer gets it aall wrang and puts a rare smile on wor faces, when he tells us that Anita haz been replaced by!---BigiBANANA! (Bigiramana!) The home side nearly pinch it in injury time when Pilkington missed an easy heeder!
Results elsewhere meen that we are STILL just two points above the 'abyss' az wor winless away run continues! (Now SEVENTEEN and coontin' in the leegue, the cups and Europe!)
Toon team: Krul, Debuchy, Williamson, Coloccini, Santon, Perch, Anita (Bigibanana! 84), Obertan (Cabaye 57), Marveaux, Gutierrez, Cisse
Attendance: 26,752 (aroond aboot 2,000 Toon faithful!)
Saturday, 12 January 2013
DELIA'Z CANARY CUSTARD CRUMBLES v THE TOON ****TOOODAY @ '3 BELLS'!
Updated '5:00am bells' Saturday 12th January 2013
In less than two hours time this mornin', we face wor thord lang train jorney in three weeks when we travel to 'Bornard Matthews Country' to take on 'Delia'z Boys' @ Carrow Road.
Both teams are strugglin' at the mo, and we can anly hope that we can break wor duck away from home this season on wot will be wor SEVENTEENTH attempt! in leegue, cup(s) and Europe!
We've been informed by wor 'secret NUFC undercover agent' that 'Captain Coloccini' will be in the line up, BUT! that this will be hiz last ever game for us and he will 'abandon ship' and gan back to hiz native Argentina after the match, NEVER to be seen in a black 'n' white Toon top again! (see article below!)
And az for the rest of wor startin' line up!?????---we'll probably NOT find oot til we get there, but new signin' Mathieu Debuchy shud be playin'! and (hopefully!) Demba Cisse will be back after missin' the 'Brighton & Hove Horror Show'!
We're on the 'five to seven bells' train to Peterborough and then onward to deepest Norfolk, arrivin' for just after openin' time!
Match/pub craal report az per usual to follow sometime on Sunday!
In less than two hours time this mornin', we face wor thord lang train jorney in three weeks when we travel to 'Bornard Matthews Country' to take on 'Delia'z Boys' @ Carrow Road.
Both teams are strugglin' at the mo, and we can anly hope that we can break wor duck away from home this season on wot will be wor SEVENTEENTH attempt! in leegue, cup(s) and Europe!
We've been informed by wor 'secret NUFC undercover agent' that 'Captain Coloccini' will be in the line up, BUT! that this will be hiz last ever game for us and he will 'abandon ship' and gan back to hiz native Argentina after the match, NEVER to be seen in a black 'n' white Toon top again! (see article below!)
And az for the rest of wor startin' line up!?????---we'll probably NOT find oot til we get there, but new signin' Mathieu Debuchy shud be playin'! and (hopefully!) Demba Cisse will be back after missin' the 'Brighton & Hove Horror Show'!
We're on the 'five to seven bells' train to Peterborough and then onward to deepest Norfolk, arrivin' for just after openin' time!
Match/pub craal report az per usual to follow sometime on Sunday!
Friday, 11 January 2013
GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE!***ABANDON SHIP!***ABANDON SHIP!
Posted '9:30pm bells' Friday 11th January 2013
A 'Geordie Times' 'NUFC club insider' informs us that 'Captain Coloccini' will DEFINATELEEE play hiz LAST game for 'The Toon' against Norwich tomorrow afternoon!
He will then abandon the 'HMS Newcastle' forever and heed for Argentina after the game, NEVER to retorn!
REMEMBER!***
YOO READ THIS FORST IN***
'THE GEORDIE TIMES'!
A 'Geordie Times' 'NUFC club insider' informs us that 'Captain Coloccini' will DEFINATELEEE play hiz LAST game for 'The Toon' against Norwich tomorrow afternoon!
He will then abandon the 'HMS Newcastle' forever and heed for Argentina after the game, NEVER to retorn!
REMEMBER!***
YOO READ THIS FORST IN***
'THE GEORDIE TIMES'!
CAPTAIN COLO TO ABANDON SHIP!???
Posted '10:00am bells' Friday 11th January 2013
Uncannily, it will be a year ago this weekend since the sinkin' of 'The Costa Concordia' when the infamous 'Captain Coward Schettino' abandoned ship forst and left the women and children to fend for themsels! after hiz ship hit rocks and sank off the Italian island of Giglio!
I say 'uncannily', az anotha 'captain' iz rumoured to want to 'abandon ship' az well, in the shape of Fabricio Coloccini the captain of NUFC!
Although 'Fab' hazzent been playin' well lately, he iz wor captain and the backbone of wor fragile team and we desperatleee need him to 'stay on board'!---but don't bother holdin' your breath beneath the waves if it does happen!
"Blub! Blub! Blub!"
 |
| "ME FIRST!---WOMAN AND CHILDREN LAST!" |
Uncannily, it will be a year ago this weekend since the sinkin' of 'The Costa Concordia' when the infamous 'Captain Coward Schettino' abandoned ship forst and left the women and children to fend for themsels! after hiz ship hit rocks and sank off the Italian island of Giglio!
I say 'uncannily', az anotha 'captain' iz rumoured to want to 'abandon ship' az well, in the shape of Fabricio Coloccini the captain of NUFC!
Although 'Fab' hazzent been playin' well lately, he iz wor captain and the backbone of wor fragile team and we desperatleee need him to 'stay on board'!---but don't bother holdin' your breath beneath the waves if it does happen!
"Blub! Blub! Blub!"
Thursday, 10 January 2013
BLACK AND WHITE ISSUE 12 ***OOT ON SATURDAY
Posted '10:10pm bells' Thorsday 10th January 2013
The latest edition of Mad Mick's 'Black and White Daft Fanzine' will be on the newsagents shelves this Saturday and features 'The Geordie Times' trip to Amsterdam when we played Sampdoria in 2007 @ St James' Park!---If that soonds a bit 'Irish' then can I respectfully request that yoo buy a copy forthwith to see wot the hell a'm on aboot!!
The latest edition of Mad Mick's 'Black and White Daft Fanzine' will be on the newsagents shelves this Saturday and features 'The Geordie Times' trip to Amsterdam when we played Sampdoria in 2007 @ St James' Park!---If that soonds a bit 'Irish' then can I respectfully request that yoo buy a copy forthwith to see wot the hell a'm on aboot!!
NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS NEWS! ***"NANTWICH! NANTWICH! HERE WE COME!"
Posted '10:20am bells' Thorsday 10th January 2013
Az expected the Toons resorve U21s have been allocated the followin' fixtures for the 2nd group stage of their season after finishin' 6th oot of 7 durin' the 1st group stage.
Groundhoppers warnin'!***Dates/venues liable to change at short notice!
Mon 21st Jan '7 bells'***Bolton, away @ Leyland<(Been Here Before Got The T-Shirt!)
Mon 28th Jan '1pm bells'***Reading, home @ Whitley Park, Benton<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 1st Feb '7 bells'***Norwich, away @ Carrow Road<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 8th Feb '1:30pm bells'***Stoke, home @ Darsley Park <Behind closed doors!? < (BHBGTTS!)
Mon 25th Feb '7 bells'***Crystal Palace, away @ Selhurst Park<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 8th Mar '1pm bells'***Man C, home @ Whitley Park
Mon 11th Mar '7 bells'***Bolton, home @ Whitley Park
Mon 18th Mar '1pm bells'***Reading, away @ Hogswood Trainin' Groond< Behind closed doors!? < never been here before, but arn't riskin' it, coz of wot happenned @ Motspur Park, Fulham
(see '285 NOT' in the Archive Grounds list in top or side toolbars)
MON 1st APR '7 BELLS'***STOKE, AWAY @ THE WEAVER STADIUM, NANTWICH!<NEW GROOND!***NEW GROOND!
Mon 8th Apr '7 bells'***Norwich, home @ Whitley Park
Fri 12th Apr '2pm bells'***Man C, away @ Ewan Fields, Hyde<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 19th Apr '7 bells'***Crystal Palace, home @ ST JAMES' PARK!<(Think? a'v been here before???)
 |
| "APRIL FOOLS DAY DESTINATION!" |
Az expected the Toons resorve U21s have been allocated the followin' fixtures for the 2nd group stage of their season after finishin' 6th oot of 7 durin' the 1st group stage.
Groundhoppers warnin'!***Dates/venues liable to change at short notice!
Mon 21st Jan '7 bells'***Bolton, away @ Leyland<(Been Here Before Got The T-Shirt!)
Mon 28th Jan '1pm bells'***Reading, home @ Whitley Park, Benton<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 1st Feb '7 bells'***Norwich, away @ Carrow Road<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 8th Feb '1:30pm bells'***Stoke, home @ Darsley Park <Behind closed doors!? < (BHBGTTS!)
Mon 25th Feb '7 bells'***Crystal Palace, away @ Selhurst Park<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 8th Mar '1pm bells'***Man C, home @ Whitley Park
Mon 11th Mar '7 bells'***Bolton, home @ Whitley Park
Mon 18th Mar '1pm bells'***Reading, away @ Hogswood Trainin' Groond< Behind closed doors!? < never been here before, but arn't riskin' it, coz of wot happenned @ Motspur Park, Fulham
(see '285 NOT' in the Archive Grounds list in top or side toolbars)
MON 1st APR '7 BELLS'***STOKE, AWAY @ THE WEAVER STADIUM, NANTWICH!<NEW GROOND!***NEW GROOND!
Mon 8th Apr '7 bells'***Norwich, home @ Whitley Park
Fri 12th Apr '2pm bells'***Man C, away @ Ewan Fields, Hyde<(BHBGTTS!)
Fri 19th Apr '7 bells'***Crystal Palace, home @ ST JAMES' PARK!<(Think? a'v been here before???)
Wednesday, 9 January 2013
THE BAD BLUE BOYS v THE HEEDBANGERS ***TOONEET!
Posted '5:55pm bells' Wednesday 9th January 2013
With a blank midweek for the NUFC forst team we torn wor attention to sooth of the Tyne toneet where 'West' Gatesheed meets 'East' Gatesheed in the shape of Dunston UTS (Bad Blue Boys!) and Gatesheed FC (Heedbangers!) for the battle for supremacy in a coonty cup match @ Federation Park (aka UTS Stadium) in Dunston!
Az both nicknames suggest, it shud be a rough old tussle on (and off!) the pitch!<(anly kiddin'!)
Kick off iz @ '7:30 bells' and the Dunston clubhoose will of course be open lang before the game for the consumption of broon ale and lager!
Update: '9:30pm bells' (Full time)
The Bad Blue Boys 1 The Heedbangers 4
Dunston, who play in the Northern League, held their own in the forst half against Conference side Gatesheed who are 4 levels higher in the Pyramid system!
The Heedbangers took the lead bang on half time and added a fortha two goals orly in the 2nd half to put the game beyond 'The Bad Blue Boys'.
A goal late on gave the home side hope, but the visitors added a 4th just before the 'death' to progress to the next stage of the coonty cup competition
Attendance: 350 (estimated) (50% each team)
Actual Attendance: 276 (we were 74 oot!)
With a blank midweek for the NUFC forst team we torn wor attention to sooth of the Tyne toneet where 'West' Gatesheed meets 'East' Gatesheed in the shape of Dunston UTS (Bad Blue Boys!) and Gatesheed FC (Heedbangers!) for the battle for supremacy in a coonty cup match @ Federation Park (aka UTS Stadium) in Dunston!
Az both nicknames suggest, it shud be a rough old tussle on (and off!) the pitch!<(anly kiddin'!)
Kick off iz @ '7:30 bells' and the Dunston clubhoose will of course be open lang before the game for the consumption of broon ale and lager!
Update: '9:30pm bells' (Full time)
The Bad Blue Boys 1 The Heedbangers 4
Dunston, who play in the Northern League, held their own in the forst half against Conference side Gatesheed who are 4 levels higher in the Pyramid system!
The Heedbangers took the lead bang on half time and added a fortha two goals orly in the 2nd half to put the game beyond 'The Bad Blue Boys'.
A goal late on gave the home side hope, but the visitors added a 4th just before the 'death' to progress to the next stage of the coonty cup competition
Attendance: 350 (estimated) (50% each team)
Actual Attendance: 276 (we were 74 oot!)
FROM CATEGORY 'A' TO CATEGORY 'D'
Posted '1:55pm bells' Wednesday 9th January 2013
When we were trounced by 'The Arse' recently, the Toon fans were charged just £35:50 admission fee to get in @ 'The Emirates', which iz on par with wot Wigan fans get charged. (category 'D' prices we believe)
'The Arses' next game iz against League Champions Man City on Sunday and their fans are kickin' up a stink aboot bein' charged a woppin' £62! quid for the same seats! (category 'A'!)
It isn't so lang ago that WE were considered a category 'A' side alang side Man U, Chelski and 'The Liverbirds'! and it shows just how far we have faallin' doon the peckin' order!
We're NOT complainin' though! az sixty two quid to sit behind the corner flag iz a ridiculous amoont to pay!
Oot of the 2,000 tickets that 'City' have been allocated, anly just ower 1,000 have been sold, with the rest retorned to 'The Arse'!<(and who can blame them!?)
Fans ARE eventually startin' to vote with their feet/pockets!---where will it aall end???
PS: Hope this isn't an omen, but in the 1950's and 60s some north east villages were classed az 'category' 'D', which meant that they were 'condemed'!
When we were trounced by 'The Arse' recently, the Toon fans were charged just £35:50 admission fee to get in @ 'The Emirates', which iz on par with wot Wigan fans get charged. (category 'D' prices we believe)
'The Arses' next game iz against League Champions Man City on Sunday and their fans are kickin' up a stink aboot bein' charged a woppin' £62! quid for the same seats! (category 'A'!)
It isn't so lang ago that WE were considered a category 'A' side alang side Man U, Chelski and 'The Liverbirds'! and it shows just how far we have faallin' doon the peckin' order!
We're NOT complainin' though! az sixty two quid to sit behind the corner flag iz a ridiculous amoont to pay!
Oot of the 2,000 tickets that 'City' have been allocated, anly just ower 1,000 have been sold, with the rest retorned to 'The Arse'!<(and who can blame them!?)
Fans ARE eventually startin' to vote with their feet/pockets!---where will it aall end???
PS: Hope this isn't an omen, but in the 1950's and 60s some north east villages were classed az 'category' 'D', which meant that they were 'condemed'!
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