CLUB BRUGGE v THE TOON***THORSDAY NEET!

Updated '7:55am bells' Wednesday 7th November 2012

Later this mornin' we set off from 'The Central' to King's Cross and then onward to Brussels by Eurostar for wor Europa Leegue group game in Brugge on Thorsday neet!

We are stoppin' in Brussels coz we reckon that it will be chaotic in Brugge centre, with an estimated 6,000 to 10,000 Geordies invadin' the beer capital of Belgium---and so Brussels it iz!

With an official followin' of 2,600 in the 'away end', there will be at least az many Toon fans in the home sections of the 29,000 capacity Janbredel Stadion, who have bought tickets elsewhere--many on the black market! (lets hope things divvint 'kick off'!)

A full and comreeehensive 'Geordie Times' 'mad-sad groundhoppers'/'beerhoppers' report will of course follow on eetha Friday neet when we get back or Saturday mornin' when we sober up! ("Er!"---"it's a lang jorney back yi naa!")

"It iz now time to put the computaa into hibernation once again for a few days!"
"ZZZZZzzzzz!!!!!"

THE LIVERBIRDS 1 THE TOON 1

Updated '10:10pm bells' Monday 5th November 2012


"WALK ON!---THROUGH THE RAIN!"
"AND YOOO'LL NE-VER WALK ALONE!"

This draw ended a run of seven successive defeats @ Anfield, but still we havent won here since 1995 and it iz nuw 18 games withoot success!

The home side started off with 'aall guns blazin' and it seemed anly a matter of time til they made the breakthrough! 
The view from row 2 of The Anfield Road End waz 'breathtakin' az yoo can see, (see below!) and for forty eight quid (plus a poond bookin' fee!) we couldn't complain!---but did the hat gan to the top of hiz heed???

"EXCUSE ME 'DIBBLE'!---BUT! DOES THAT HAT
GAN TO THE TOP OF YOUR HEED???"

However!--despite the home sides dominance in the orly exchanges, (we just managed to see roond 'dibble's' helmet!) it waz 'The Toon' who took the lead in the 44th minute of the forst half when Yohan Cabaye, on the left from us, hit a stunnin' strike across the face of the goal into the far corner of the net in front of The Kop, after Ben Arfa had sent a pin point cross to him across the box, to send the Toon faithful in the Anfield Road End into ecstasy!


"WHY DOES IT AALWAYS RAIN ON ME?"

At half time there waz a hilarious incident when a pitch waata sprinkler went 'beserk' and sprayed waata onto some 500 scousers in the main stand 'posh seats', drenchin' them to the bone!    
"Er!"---I naa we shudn't laff!---BUT!-------"HA!"--"HA!"
(see top photo!)

In the second period 'The Liverbirds' had many chances to level things and this finally happened at the mid point of the half when 'divin champion' Luis Suarez roonded Tim Krul in 'The Toon' goal and slotted home to break wor hearts!

THE TOON ATTACK THE ANFIELD ROAD END

'Fab' Coloccini waz then sent off in the 84th minute for a downward kick on 'diver Suarez' in frustration! (he did hiz divin' act a couple of times durin the game and had gave 'Fab' a torrid time throughoot the match!)

We held oot though for the point and it waz a releeeved Toon Army who left Anfield in the better mood!

On the injury front James Perch, Demba Ba and Yohan Cabaye aall limped off the pitch at various points durin' the match, to give wor manager a few heedaches ower the next few days in antisipation of wor trip to Brugge on Thorsday in the Europa Leegue!

Toon team: Krul, Anita, Steven Taylor, Coloccini, Santon, Ben Arfa, Perch (Simpson 25), Cabaye (Ferguson 67), Gutierrez, Ba (Sammy Ameobi 48), Cisse

Attendance: divvint naa yet but it waz a full hoose!  (wor guess is 44,500 plus, includin' 2,000 Toon fans!") "ER!"---just foond oot: 44,803

THE LIVERBIRDS v THE TOON****TODAY @'4 bells'!

Posted '7:45am bells' Sunday 4th November 2012


(SEE GROUND 003 IN THE 'ARCHIVE
GROUNDS LIST' IN THE TOP
TOOLBAR)
 

For wot must be the 100th time since 1968, 'The Geordie Times' heeds for 'Beatleland' for wor game against the 'red half' of Morseyside in less than an hours time (havin' played 'the blue half' in September!)

Wor record @ Anfield in recent years iz shockin' to say the least!---with the last win comin' in a 1-0 'leegue cup' triumph in 1995 (When Steve Watson scored the anly goal of the game!)
Since then we have failed to beat them in 17 attempts and have lost the last 'seven in a row'!

We set off @ '8:30bells' and I think we shud be able to find wor way there by nuw!?

Az per usual a full 'GeordieTimes' match and pub report will follow much later when we get back!

(Lets hope it isn't a 'Eight in a row' report!)

SPORS U21 RESORVES 6 THE TOON U21 RESORVES 0!

Updated '9:50pm bells' Saturday 3rd November 2012

Ground number 292
Date of First Visit: 3rd November 2012

Bulls Cross Training Complex
Enfield, London

Tottenham Hotspur U21s  6
Newcastle United U21s     0

FA Professional Development League

Attendance: 150 (estimated) (4 extremleee mad-sad Toonhoppers!)





THE TOON---IN MAROON!--
MAKE A RARE ATTACK ON THE SPORS GOAL
@ 'THE PRIVET HEDGE END'!

After droppin' off fellow 'mad-sad groundhopper' 'Liam of Westgate' ootside 'The Newcasil Laybaa Club', havin' just retorned from wor 600 mile roond trip 'sorte' to "norf Landan", it's time to write the latest 'disaster report' to add to the 'extremleee mad-sad list'!


"A RACE AGAINST TIME!"

We set off from Morrisons supermarket @ Killingworth (where Liam works the neetshift) @ 'twenty to seven am bells' this mornin' in mee 'canny tranny' for the 300 mile trip to Enfield, where Spors have their new trainin' complex.
With just ower fower hours to get there it waz aalways gannih be  a 'close caall' az to wetha we would make the start.

To cut a lang story short we had 'googled' a map to take us exactly to wor destination and on arrival in Enfield with 'ne time to spare' (az it waz dead on 'kick off' time) we tried frantically to find the complex which we thought waz next to 'The Rose & Crown' boozer (but WASN'T!?)

A desperate phone caall to 'The Bear' (who waz aaready at the complex) to ask him where the hell it waz then followed???

The complex waz in fact a mile away from where we were on a different road (he telt us!) and by the time we eventually arrived, we had missed the forst twenty minutes of the game! 

'Glennn from Ashington' who waz aalso another 'extreme saddo' who had made the 'pilgrimage' to the new groond telt us that 'The Toon' were aalready two-nil doon and that Spors had just scored their 2nd goal az we arrived! (at least we hadn't missed a TOON goal!)

We DID see the thord goal however!---scored by  a TOON player, namelee, Yven Moyo!---UNFORTUNATELEEEE it waz a heeded OWN GOAL into The Toon goal to put us three-nil doon orly in the 2nd half!
Spors forward, Pritchard, then curled a free kick high into wor net with 'not one' Toon player respondin', az they stood like statues az the baall flew past them!
To be fair not one of wor line up had ever had forst team expierience and it showed
(see crumpled team sheet below!)

A fortha two goals from Obika completed wor misery for a six-nil rout!

We then jumped back in wor 'canny tranny' and heeded the 300 miles back up the A1!

Anotha one off the 'disaster list'!

PS: The Toon U18s aalso lost to Spors U18s--by 4 goals to 1 on a pitch on the other side of the complex!

292 bulls cross training complex spurs reserves

(Ground number 292)

Date of First Visit: 3rd November 2012

Bulls Cross Training Complex, Enfield, London

Tottenham Hotspur Reserve U21s 6

Newcastle United Reserve U21s 0

FA Professional Development League

Attendance: 150 (estimated) (4 extremleee mad-sad Toonhoppers!)

THE TOON (IN MAROON) MAKE A RARE ATTACK
@ 'THE PRIVIT HEDGE END'

After droppin’ off fellow ‘mad-sad groundhopper ‘Liam of the Lamp’ outside the ‘Newcasel Laybaa Club’, havin’ just returned from wor 600 mile roond trip ‘sorte’ to “norf Landan”, it waz time to write the latest ‘Disaster Days instaalment’ to add to the extreeemleee ‘mad-sad list’!


“A RACE AGAINST TIME!”

We had set off from ‘Morrison’s Supermarket car park’ in Killingworth (where Liam waz workin’ the neetshift) @ ’twenty to seven am bells’ in mee ‘canny tranny’ for the 300 mile trip to Enfield, where Sporz have their new trainin’ complex.

With just fower hours to get there it waz always gannih be a ‘close caall’ az to wethaa we would make the ’11 bells’ start!?

To cut a lang story short we had ‘Googled’ a map to take us exactly to wor destination and on arrival in Enfield with ‘ne time to spare’ (az it waz dead on kick off time!) we tried frantically to find the complex which we thought waz next to a boozer called ‘The Rose and Crown’ (but it wasn’t!)

A desperate phone caall to ‘The Bear’ (who waz already at the complex) to ask him where the hell it waz, then followed!
The complex waz in fact a mile away from where we were on a different road (so he telt us!) and by the time we eventually foond it tucked in a little side road, we had missed the forst 20 minutes of the game!

‘Glennn from Ashington’ who waz aalso anothaa ‘extreeeme saddo’ who had made the ‘pilgrimage’ to the new groond, telt us that The Toon were aalready 2-0 doon and that Sporz had just scored their 2nd goal az we arrived! (at least we hadn’t missed any Toon goals!)

We DID see the thord goal, however!---scored by a TOON player, namely, Yven Moyo---UNFORTUNATELEEE it waz a heeded OWN GOAL to put us 3-0 doon orly in the 2nd half!

Sporz forward, Pritchard, then curled a free kick high into wor net, with ‘not one’ Toon player respondin’, az the baall flew past them!To be fair not one of wor line-up had ever had forst team experience and it showed!

A forthaa 2 goal from Sporz centre forward Obika, completed wor misery for a six-nil rout!We then jumped back in wor ‘canny tranny’ for the 300 mile journey back up the ‘A1’

Anothaa one off ‘The Disaster List’!

 PS: The Toon’s U18s aalso lost to Sporz U18s on a pitch at the far end of the complex which kicked off at the same time, by fower goals to one!
(NOT a good day for ‘The Toon’ in “norf Landan!”)

SPORS RESORVES v THE TOON RESORVES***SATURDAY MORNIN'!

Updated '5:00am bells' Saturday 3rd November 2012 

The next game (and new groond!) on the 'NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' 'radar', iz 'The Toon resorves away game @ Spors @ their Enfield trainin' groond later this mornin' in just six hours time from now!---but will we get there for the start???

The kick off iz @ '11:00 am bells' and az one of 'the hoppers' doesn't finish hiz neetshift @ a Killingworth supermarket til '6:30 bells' this mornin', we will be 'pushin it' to say the least to get to Enfield in 'norf Landan' for the kick off! (the 'U18s' are aalso playin' at the complex at the same time on an ajacent pitch!)

Any major traffic delays anywhere will put 'a spanner in the works' and we may have to abandon the trip at any point of the jorney!
We estimate that even withoot any delays it will tek us fower hours at least to get there and of course we'll have to find the groond az well!

The game iz open to the public, so if any of  'The London Branch' iz readin' this, the poscode for the groond iz 'Hotspur Way' 'EN2 9AP'

Will we make it????---well!---yi'll just have to read 'The Geordie Times'  tooneet to find oot!---WON'T YI!

LATEST NUFC AWAY TICKET NEWS!***CLUB BRUGGE A SELLOOT!

Updated '3:30pm bells' Thorsday 1st November 2012

^^^^^ "MORE VALUABLE THAN GOLD DUST!" ^^^^^

Not suprizingleee the 900 extra Brugge tickets that were made available last week have been 'snapped up' for wor 'sorte' to Belgium in the Europa League next Thorsday, meeeenin' that we will have 2,600 'official places' in the away section, plus many! many! (MANY!) more in the home sections!
Dependin' on just who yoo believe, an estimite of between 6,000 and 17,000? Toon fans are plannin' to travel ower/under (& swim?) the English Channel next week!

Wor game against
'The Liverbirds' next> Sunday iz completleee selt oot!

 

Tickets for wor games @ Sooothampton (£35 big kids/£31zimmerframites /£16 sprogs) and 'The Pulis P*ss Potts' (£30/£21/£17&£14) are now on sale to season ticket holders who have 25 or more loyalty points
(ie: thoze of yoo who have attended 25 or more away games!)

IT'SSSSS OFFICIAL!**********

Posted '2:15pm bells' Thorsday 1st November 2012

The SMBs top goalscorer for October IZ!******
******DEMBA BA!******

October 6th v Man C:  No scorer
October 21st v The Toon: DEMBA BA (og)
October 27th v Stoke: No scorer
October 30th v Smoggies: No scorer  

 

THE HALLOWEEN DERBY MASSACRE!***ANNIVORSARY!***TOODAY!

Posted @ 'Halloween bells' Wednesday 31st October 2012

"FIVE-ONE!"*"TO THE GEORDIE BOYS!"

Today's the day that every Geordie shud celebrate wildleee! az ON THIS DAY! just two short years ago! we 'massacred the mackems' FIVE!-ONE! @ St James' Park, when 'King' Kevin Nolan got a hat-trick and Shola Ameobi added two more to hiz 'derby collection'!

Get the Halloween lanterns oot! and give the bairns a 'trick or treaty, sweety!' to celebrate one of the greatest days in wor lang and glorious history! 

"HARK NOW HEAR THE GEORDIES SING!"
"IT'S HALLOWEEN TONEET!"
"T'WAS NOLAN 'THREE'!!! AND SHOLA 'TWO'!!"
"A HAT-'TRICK' AND A 'TREAT'!!!!!"

THE TOON 2 THE BAGGIE TROOSERS 1

Updated '3:00pm bells' Monday 29th October 2012


BAGGIES FANS IN LEVEL 7---(TOP OF PICTURE)
"WATCH OOT BELOW!"

This waz another lack lustre performance from The Toon, but we won it with a fluke goal deep deep into stoppage time @ the end of the match when a Sammy Ameobi shot hit Cisse's back and the baall reboonded into the net leavin' 'The Baggie Troosers' keeper stranded az we celebrated a most unexpected victory!

It waz obvious from the word 'go' that this would be a dour match az we couldn't seem to string two passes together with the visitors pushin' us back at every instant.
Against the run of play Demba Ba opened the scorin' for us in the 35th minute when he struck a sweet volley into the net @ 'The Leazes End' from a Shola Ameobi heeded 'flick on' and just after this Tim Krul in the Toon goal made two ootstandin' saves to deny the visitors and we were very lucky to gan in one-nowt up at the interval!

The inevitable equaliser however came in the 55th minute when Lukaku, who had lost his marker, had the easy chance of heedin' home past Tim Krul!

It waz 'backs to the waall' after this and the away side pressed for the winner but they couldn't get past 'Timmy' again.

And then that fluke equaliser!!!--If I waz a WBA fan a'd have been caallin' 'The Samaritans', tearin' mee hair oot and hoyin' meesel ower the balcony of 'The Leazes End' at the final whistle!!!

Toon team: Krul, Simpson (Cisse 61), Williamson, Coloccini, Santon, Ben Arfa, Perch, Cabaye, Gutierrez, Shola Ameobi (Obertan 61), Ba (Sammy Ameobi 73)

Attendance: 49,731 (1,400 suicidal 'Baggie Troosers' in level 7 of 'The Leazes'!)
(we predicted a crowd of between 47,000 to 48,000 and that WBA would bring 1,500 fans!)---so we wornt TOOO far oot!

Footnote: After the match we heeded for 'The Newcastle Arms' for a bit of post match 'tonsil ticklin', where we bumped into two Baggies fans sportin' their home strip. They were husband and wife and she telt us that she used to support 'The Villa'!
"So why do yi support West Brom now?", we asked curiously!?"
"Because my ex husband supported Villa and my new husband supports Albion!"-----"Albion and Villa hate each other!", she replied!