Tuesday, 21 February 2017

THE TOON 2 BROKEN NOSE BRUCE'S HAZBEENZ & VILLANS 0 ***EFL 2016-2017

Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 21st February 2017

"WOT GANS AROOND!--COMES AROOND!"



GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE! ***
"LANSBURY (NUMBER 5) OWN GOAL!-HA!-HA!"
(PICTURE BY STEEV WHO WOZ BEHIND GOAL!)

'Villan of the peace' Henri Lansbury, (who cheated when we played Forest away orlier this season, resultin' in 2 sendins off for NUFC), woz roundly booed throughout the match, az woz that 'round' person in the away dugout, affectionately known az 'Broken Nose Bruce' to Toon fans!

Again, we struggled to break doon the away teams defence @ SJP and the 1,700 or so 'Hazbeenz' fans in level 7 of The Leazes End (they couldn't sell their 3,200 allocation!) slagged us off from the forst whistle!
"Sing in the library!" and "We forgot that you were here!", were just 2 of the very old and outdated chants that they 'hoyed' at us!

Worryingly, Dwight Gayle, who had just returned from injury limped off after half an hour with wot looked like a hamstring injury and woz replaced by 'Mitro'


1st HALF ACTION AZ WE ATTACK THE LEAZES GOAL


We did eventually make the breakthrough in the 43rd minute when Gouffran scrambled the baall home az it came off Lascelles heed from a Shelvey corner at The Leazes End and we went in 1-0 up at half time!

It didn't take lang in the 2nd period to double wor advantage when anothaa corner from Shelvey ended up in the back of the net!
We wernt sure who'd scored and aa thought it might be an own goal!?
The tannoy announcer confirmed that indeed it woz an own goal, and woz scored by 'one' HENRI LANSBURY who had hit hiz own post before the baall rickoshaded into the Villa goal!
There woz a huge roar--louder than the roar for the goal, when this woz announced and Lansbury looked a broken man az he heeded back to the half way line for the restart!
Taak aboot s*ittin' in your own nest!!!---"GET IN!"

He then had to suffer sarcastic taunts of "There's only one Henri Lansbury!", from the Toon faithful az 'The Hazbeenz & Villans' fans suddenly went aall quiet (like in a LIBRARY!--"HA!-HA!")
SHELVEY TAKES A CORNER AT THE GALLOWGATE END

We could have had more goals, but couldn't make wor superiority coont az the clock ticked doon and the Villa fans disappeared into the night!
The team, the manager the player and the fans we love to hate (after they mocked wor relegation in 2009 and last year) were in disarray and a relegation battle looms for them!
"Couldn't ask for a better ending!"---"BRILLIANT!"

Toon team: Darlow, Lascelles, Yedlin, Clark, Dummett, Shelvey, Colback, Richie, Gouffran (Atsu 88), Diame, Gayle (Mitrovic 33)

Attendance: 50,024 (just 1,760 'Hazbeenz &Villans')
*
"GET THE FLAGS OOT!"

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