THE COTTAGE PIE BRIGADE OF FULIM v THE TOON *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

Posted '6:00pm 🛎️ bells' Friday 20th Septembaa 2024

             AALL 2,300 AWAY TICKETS SOLD OOT!

Tomorrow afternooon NUFC take on Fulim at Craven Cottage in a very rare '3:00pm 🔔 bells' kick off time! (Nee live telly— unless yi have a fire 🔥 stick!)

This meeenz that we can get to King's Cross in London and come back the same day!----A rare event indeed for a London game!

We have won there in 5 consecutive games, (includin' 2 aalready in 2024!) so lets hope we can make it 6 in a row and get the 3 points! News that Alexander the Great (Isak) haz a toe injury followin wor 2-1 success at Wolves last week and iz doubtful?

If we dee get the win, then we will be top of The Premyaa Leegue for a day at least, az the 2 teams above us in the table, Man City and The Arse divvint play each other til Sunday afternooon!

We are on the ‘8:28am 🛎️ bells' train to King's Cross in the mornin', retornin on the '8:00pm 🔔 bells' train back to Tyneside!

A full Geordie Time s match and pub crawl report will appear here sometime on Sunday!

Az per usual "Watch this space intentleeee!"

*

DOUBLE JOY FOR THE NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS!

 *Posted ‘7:37pm 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 19th Septembaa 2024

                           COMPETING TEAMS

News haz reached the Geordie Times that wor U21s are to play in the inaugural National Leegue Cup comprising of 16 Premyaa Leegue U21s Academy teams and team from The National Leegue—the unofficial Division 5

This iz mouthwaterin 🤪 news for The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers az 2 of the groonds have never been visited by us before!

They are The Tamworth 🐷 Pigs (Tamworth FC) and The Boston Stranglers (Boston United) although we HAVE played Boston at their old groond which they vacated 4 years ago for a new groond on the outskirts of Boston!

We will aalso play Gatesheed in a first competitive game their since World War 2!

Aalso on the list are Halifax’s Shay Groond where we saw a Toon resorve side play Leeedz resorves many years ago—but we have never seen us play Halifax there! (“Oh the joy!”)

The games sequences are az follows!

Halifax at The Shay on Tuezday or Wedinzday 1/2 Octobaa 👇

Gatesheed at Gatesheed International Stadium on Tuezday or Wedinzday 5/6 Novembaa 👇

Tamworth at The Lamb Groond on Tuezday or Wedinzday 3/4 👇Decembaa

Boston at Jakemans Community Stadium on Tuezday or Wedinzday 21/22 January 2025 👇

Pleeeze note! nufc.com says Tamworth game iz in Decembaa while Tamworth’s website say Novembaa?  They cannit both be right?  Somebody haz made a misstayk—but who?🤔

We will let yiz naa az soon az we find oot!

STEVE HARDWICK RIP 🪦

 * Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 19th Septembaa 2024

We are very sad to report the passing of former Toon goalie Steve Hardwick who has died at the age of 68

Steve woz signed from Chesterfield in1976 and played ower 100 times for NUFC. 

He played in King Kev’s debut v QPR in 1982 (Keegan) and woz sold to Oxford in 1983

RIP STEVE! 🪦 

SCARBORO ATHLETIC SEA DOGS 5. DUNSTON BAD BLUE BOYS 2 *** FA CUP 2nd PRELIMINARY ROOND REPLAY

 *Posted ‘5:00pm 🔔 bells’ Wedinzday 18th Septembaa 2024

*Havin drawn the first game 1-1 in Dunston, which the home side shud have won in the dyin minutes, this replay woz a bit one sided with Scarborough on top for most of the game! (They are 2 ‘steps’ higher in the futbaall pyramid system)

We travelled doon on the Dunston team bus (committee at the front— fans in the middle —players at the back) and were told that away fans wernt allowed into their clubhoose for pre match booze and wud be segregated inside the groond despite Dunston welcoming’ Scarboro fans into their clubhoose last Saturday and there woz nee segregation at UTS Stadium!

Not a good take at aall from them! 💩!

Because of this, when we got to the groond, we were forced (at gunpoint 🔫) (honest!)to trek to the nearest boozer 15 minutes away for wor pre match ‘gargels’

After shovelling doon vast quantities of the local ale (John Smiths bitter!) in ‘The Valley’, it woz time to heed back to the groond! (The Flamingoland Stadium)

On arrival we asked where the away end woz and were directed past the main entrance where the committee gan. We wandered in and one of the lads who just happened to be an ex resorves Toon player in the 1980s (Justin Robson) said hiz son woz playin for Dunston (Scott) and woz on the list for free entry to the main stand because of this!

Az he woz talkin to the lass on reception, aa walked past him and wasn’t challenged! I woz in for free az well and didn’t have to pay the £16 entry to the away end! (The bus woz free az well (normally £10) so it torned oot to be a very cheap day oot for me!🤪👍

Dunston charged half the price for admission in the forst game! So two fingers up to them for tryin to rip us off and treat us like 2nd class fans!

(Nee alcohol allowed in the away end eethaa!)

PS: Normally I wud gladly pay, but because of wor unhospitable💩 treatment I said “fcuk them!”

The game didn’t start off well for The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston (playin in aall blue, wud yoo believe?) and were 1-0 doon after anly 3 minutes when scored for Scarboro with a shot past Dan Lawson in the Bad Blue Boys goal!

Dunston held oot til the 32nd minute when Tear scored from a through baall to bring tears 😭 to wor eyes!(sic!)

6 minutes later it woz 3-0 when Wiles latched onto a through baall to fire 🔥 home!  HT 3-0 to The Seadogs!

It woz soon 4-0 orly in the 2nd half when Wilson interspersed a back pass!— The Wembley dream woz ower for The Bad Blue Boys!🥶

A glimmer of hope in the 75th minute when Richie Coulson hit a rebound in after a Robinson effort!

4-1

The ‘glimmer’ woz soon shattered when Ross shot past Lowson, but Sado Djalo made the score look a little more respectible when latched onto a 💩 clearance to reduce the arrears deep into stoppage time!

FT Seadogs 5 Bad Blue Boys 2

Attendance: 770 including aboot 35 from Dunston!  👇20 in the away end (Including me it woz actually 771!)

—The Dunston Blue Army in the away seats 👇 (A huge contingent az yoo can see!)👇

and some committee and players relations in the main stand!👇

NIL-oot of TEN for hospitality!💩

And the first time ever in the 71 away groonds visited by 'little old me' followin Dunston, that we have been segregated and denied access to a clubhoose!

PS: The othaa Bad Blue Boys from Zagreb (where we went to watch NUFC and twinned them with Dunston) lost 9-2 to Bayern Munich in The Champions Leegue az well on the same neet!🥶

NOT!  a good day oot for eethaa fan bases!—woz it!?

“IT’S ENOUGH TO DRIVE YOO TO DRINK!”

A DUNSTON FAN AFTER THE 5th GOAL WENT IN!🥶

WOLVES WANABEEZ 1. THE TOON 2 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘3:52pm bells’ Munday 16th Septembaa 2024

“A BARNESTORMIN’ FINISH!”

Wolverhampton haz 50 pubs within walking distance of their Molineux Stadium—2nd only to The Toon which haz close on 200! But not one of Wolves pubs allows away fans in, in total contrast to NUFC where 99.9% let away fans in!

This meant that Toon fans were forced to gan elsewhere for wor pre match booze!

We chose Stafford like a canny few othaa Toon fans did, which iz a 15 minute train ride from Wolves!

A ridiculous situation that makes yoo wish that they would get relegated!

Anyway! we arrived in good time for the kick off where the usual 💩 flame throwers were positioned aroond the pitch and lit when the Wolves players name were read oot ower the tannoy! Hopefully NUFC will never stoop to this Americanisation of futbaall!? (but divvint haad yi breath!)

We played in wor maroon and dark blue kit and started off very sluggishly and just couldn’t get oot of first gear az Wolves pressed forward!

Eventually their persistence prevailed when an error from Longstaff in the 36th minute, let in Larson and his crosss across the box woz ‘dummied’ by Gomez for Lemina to poke home unmarked! 1-0 to them!

Things needed to change and 3 subs were brought on at the start of the 2nd half: Tonali replaced Longstaff, Willock replaced Joelinton and Barnes replaced Isak who woz injured in the first half!

This did the trick az WE pressed forward but we still couldn’t find the breakthrough!

The ‘key’ to change aall this came in the 64th minute when Kieran Trippier replaced Livramento and straight away his influence bore fruit!🍇 👈(No! not that kind of fruit!)

Within 11 minutes of him organisin things we were level when a Rakin shot from ‘Fab’ Schar from ootside the box took a deflection off Dawson and sailed into the roof of the net to send the 3,000 travellin faithful into wild celebrations—so wild that this fat kid in the row in front of me fell backwards ower his seat and nearly broke mee leg! 🦵 

While those celebrations were gannin on and just 5 minutes later, up stepped one of the half time ‘super subs’ Harvey Barnes to send a right footed screamer into the top right hand corner of the goal!

I woz ready this time! and az the fat fcuker again fell backwards I had mee arms outstretched to push him into some poor unfortunate soul in the row in front of him!”😫”Aarrrr!”

Despite 9 minutes of stoppage time added, we held on to take the valuable 3 points to climb to the dizzy 😵‍💫 heights of 3rd place in the Premyaa Leegue table with 10 points from 12!

We’ve played 5 games including 1 in the Leegue Cup—We’ve been below par in aall of them—but still undefeated!

That’s the sign of greatness we have been told—But will wor luck 🍀 desert us eventually? OR! Will we come good and prove the doubters wrang?🤔

Attendance:30,255 (3,000 faithful who drank elsewhere pre match!🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺)

Like here in Stafford!👇

THE PICTURE HOUSE (An old cinema converted into a WETHERSPOONS)

And post match back to The Yard and beyond! 👇

PS: Stafford iz aboot 15 miles from Wolverhampton— mebeez we should ban Wolves fans from aall wor bars and send them to mackemland instead, when we play them up at wor place! (Tit for tat anybody?)🤔

WOLVERHAMPTON WANABEEZ V THE TOON *** SUNDAY AFTERNOOON!

 *Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Sataday 14th Septembaa 2024

The last time we were here

 Octobaa 2023  Drew 2-2 (Callum Wilson 2 (1pen) NUFC in green)

*We travel to the first of 3 consecutive away games on Sunday when we play Wolves at Molineux and aall 3,000 away ticket were sold ages ago! (Warnin!—NEE Toon fans allowed in ANY boozers in Wolverhampton!—-An effin disgrace!🥶)

Up til now NUFC are unbeaten in 4 games and hopefully we can extend this to 5!

Then on Saturday week we are off to west London to tek on Fulim at Craven Cottage and then travel back to London, this time on the south bank when we tel on The Wombles of Wimbledon at their new abode in The Leegue Cup the Tuezday after that!  A brand new groond for ‘The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’!

Match reports on aall these games plus Dunston’s big FA Cup tie v Scarborough at UTS Stadium this afternooon!

Az per usual “Watch this space!”

“THE SKYS THE LIMIT!”

 *Posted 5:28pm 🔔 bells’ Friday the 13th (unlucky fixture changes for some—-us!) Septembaa 2024

3 oot of wor 4 games in Novembaa have been moved to ridiculous kick off times for SKY and TNT telly!

Novembaa fixture fcuk ups!

Saturday 2nd November:

 The Arse at SJP now ‘12:30 🔔’!😵

Sunday 10th November: 

The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham at The City Groond now ‘2:00 🔔’!😱

Munday 25th November: 

The Jellied Eels Mob of West Ham now ‘8:00 🔔’!🙈

Saturday 30th  November: 

The Paliss Prats at Selhorst Park still ‘3:00 🔔’ BUT nee trains to King’s Cross coz the line north of there iz shut!🥶

NUFC TELLY FIXTURES FOR NIVEMBAA IMMINENT!

 *Posted 👋 high noon bells 🔔 Friday the 13th (unlucky for some!) Septembaa 2024

Fowaa Toon games in Novembaa are at risk of bein moved for live telly and are due to be announced this afternooon! ( but divvint haad yi breath! 🌬️)

They are aall ‘3:00 bells 🔔 kick offs at the mo!

Sat 2nd Novembaa 

The Arse at SJP

Sat 9th Novembaa 

The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham at The City groond

Sat 23rd Novembaa 

The Jellied Eels Mob of West Ham at SJP (rumoured to be moved to Munday neet?)

Sat 30th Novembaa

The Pallis *Prats at Selhorst Park

(*Anti Saudi banners at the ready!)

NEE NUFC FIXTURES FOR 2 WEEKS THEN 3 AWAY GAMES IN A ROW!

 *Posted just after ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Munday 9th Septembaa 2024

With just 3 Premyaa Leegue games played so far, we have the ridiculous situation of a fortneets break and then 3 away games in a row, startin at Wolves next Sunday, followed by Fulim away the followin Saturday and then Wimbledon the Tuesday after that!

It seems crazy that the season haz hardly started and we have a lang break?

The Wolves game iz sold oot with 3,000 tickets sold, az iz the Fulim game, a 2,300 allocation, while Wimbledon ticket sales are still on gannin to season ticket holders with 112 loyalty points—allocation not known, but Ipswich got 1,800 tickets for their Leegue Cup game there!

Will keep yoo posted just when the Wimbledon tickets are aall gone and how many we got!?

Updated '10:05pm bells'

Just hord we have been allocated a paltry 1,100 tickets for Wimbledon----700 less than wot Ipswich got!

EMLEY 2 DUNSTON BAD BLUE BOYS 0 *** FA TROPHY 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘2:08pm 🔔 bells’ Saturday 7th September 2024

“WHO ARE YOU?”

With nee Toon games ower this weekend coz of the International break, aa got mee ‘fix’ at Emley in  deeepest Yorkshire to watch mee fave non leegue club, Dunston in the FA Trophy (for non leegue clubs) on the Team coach!  (Committee at the front, players at the back and supporters in the middle of the coach!) A 225 mile roond trip!

The game woz played on a Friday neet coz Emley share their groond with a cricket club and the Dunston hierarchy were non too pleeezed to have to dee a roond trip to the sooth Yorkshire dales on a Friday neet, instead of Saturday afternooon!

Anyway! the traffic woz heavy az we got onto the notorious A1 near ‘the monstrosity of the north’ ( The Gatesheed Angel!) but after gettin stuck in the queue we eventually got to Washington sorvices to pick some more players and supporters up!

The coach woz rammed and this bloke who I didn’t naa sat beside me!

We got taakin and he told me his son Scott woz playin for Dunston and that’s why he woz gannin!

Later on he said he had played for Newcasil in the orly 1980s but hadn’t made it into the NUFC 1st team due to injury!

“Who are you?” I asked and he replied “Justin Robson”!

The name ‘rang a 🛎️’ and I said that I had probably seen him in wor resorve side aall those years ago! (Fink aboot it🤔—-an old Toon player woz sittin next to me and I didn’t naa who he woz!—the 😳 shame!)

Anyway! We arrived in Emley deep into the countryside and there woz this massive telly transmission mast in the distance on top of a hill!

Taller than both the Eiffel Tower in France and The Shard in London, I woz told!— So that makes it the tallest structure in the UK!

(NO! It’s not ‘The Leanin Tower of Emley’—-The tower doesn’t lean—it’s me takin the photo! Memo: Must drink fewer liquid lubrications! “hic!)😵‍💫

“THE SKY’Z THE LIMIT!”

Dunston diehards Davy the Silver Fox and his sidekick Barbara had made their own way there by trains and (expensive!) taxis!  It had been a total disaster trip for them, az numerous trains were cancelled and they went to the wrang hotel in Huddersfeeeld, where they were stayin! (🙈)

More’disasters’followed az the game kicked off az ‘The Bad Blue Boys’ (playin aall RED!) just didn’t get oot of the blocks and were 2-0 doon lang before half time! (6th and 35th minute goals!)?In total Dunston had just 1 shot on target in this half

The 2nd half woz a bit better, but the linesman on the far side from us kept puttin his flag up for offsides against Dunston, when the players were ‘on side’—-The ref woz useless az well and booked at least 8 players from both sides! (probably more—I lost coont!)

Emley players fained injuries near the end to waste time and they held oot til the final whistle to progress to the next rooond!

Attendance: 410 (including the committee, aboot 25 Dunston fans)

This woz mee 72nd groond watchin The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston!

Not bad for a part time supporter!?ehh!

PS: Justin Robson iz the brother of Bryan Robson who won numerous honours with Moan U!

I trawled through the NUFC record books and found that Justin had scored one goal for wor resorves—a 3-1 win at Leeds 41 years ago in May 1983! (Nee wonder I didn’t recognise him after aall this time!)

He aalso played for West Brom and Gatesheed!

The ‘gargles’ took place here!

The White Horse

Spot the telly transmitter mast!?

The Emley clubhoose

NOT THAT FANTASTIC AZ THERE WOZ A CRICKET PITCH ON THE FAR SIDE OF THIS 3 SIDED GROOND!