365 signal iduna park, dortmund, germany

Ground number 365 (117th consecutive European competition game home and away)

Date of First visit: 7th November 2023

Signal Iduna Park, Dortmund, Germany

Borussia Dortmund 2

Newcastle United 0

Champions League Group Stage 'F'

Attendance: 81,365 (3,900 Toon fans plus 1,000 plus more in the home sections

“Once yiv seen one waall,  yiv seen them aall!”

View from row 23 seat 23 in the upper tier.  Toon in green strip

*”Injury crisis engulfs The Toon!”

With 7 players ruled oot because of injuries and 1 suspended it woz never gannin to be eezy—Add in the fact that we didn’t play very well and a 2-0 defeat wozzint a surprise!

Ower 10,000 had travelled to Jawmany and with an allocation of just 3,900 many Toon fans bought tickets for the home sections on the black market for 150 euros upwards!

The Yellow Wall at Dortmund behind the home goal holds 35,000 and iz huge and they did a canny flag display az The Champions Leegue tune rang oot before the game!! (Not az good az ‘Wor Flags’ of course!)

Aalso they played ‘You’ll never walk alone' ower the tannoy to very loud booos from The Toon end!

From the word ‘go’ we looked knackered and Dortmund looked the better side!

After some lucky deflections the baall fell to Fullrug in the 26th minute and he made nee misstayk,beatin Pope in The Toon goal in front of The Yellow Wall!(Fullrug had certainly pulled the rug from under wor feet!)(sic!)

HT 1-0 to them

*We played much better in the 2nd period and Joelinton missed 2 glorious chances, heedin wide both times!

And did we pay the price for those missedmisses!  In the 79th minute Brandt woz put clean though and placed his shot beyond The Pope in The Toon goal!

Almiron aalso had a great chance but fired straight at their keeper!

The players came ower to applaud the travelling’ faithful at the end!

And we have to say that the Dortmund fans were great with nee animosity---Indeed Toon fans were in the home sections WITH their colours on! 

Attendance: 81,365  3,900 Toon fans in the away end plus aboot 1,000 in the home sections! (At least!)

Dortmund fans protest against the European Super Leegue (Not aboot the NUFC takeover az reported by the BBC) The 3 main culprits below!

From left to right: Juventus owner, UEFA president and PSG owner

A 2-0 defeat and with ACcMilan beatin PSG 2-1 it woz more bad news az it sent us to the bottom of Group F (it iz indeed the group of death!)

We have 2 more chances to try and get 2 the top 2 and qualify for the knockout stage—/ it won’t be eezy

*footnote: beforehand we had watched wor U19s draw 2-2 v Dortmund U19s at their Braken trainin groond, so that’s 2 new groonds to add to the list for The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers!

Numbers 364 and 365🤪👍

We’ve done aall the world’s waalls now!

1 The Berlin waall (when NUFC played Chemnister)

2,The Byker waall! (of course!)

3 The Great waall of China-town (The city waalls near SJP in Bath Lane and behind Stowell Street)

4 The Borussiaaa Dortmund Yellow waall 

5 And of course Hadrians waall 

And speaking of that, have yoo ever wondered where The Sycamore Gap Tree ended up after it woz chopped doon?

Whey maan!—-We foond it in wor hotel foyer in Düsseldorf before wor game in Dortmund! 🌳 🤪👍

More on aall this much later  plus a match and booze report on both games! (It’s nearly 3 bells 🔔 now and time for boardin for the 3 30 bells flight ✈️ back to Toon airport!)

In total 9 places that sold booze were visited on wor way to and back from Dortmund. Toon airport, Dusseldorf, Dortmund and Dusseldorf airport

Runnin total 52

SPORTSBAR DÜSSELDORF AIRPORT GERMANY

BORUSSIAAA DORTMUND v THE TOON *** CHAMPIONS LEEGUE *** TUEZDAY NEET!

 Posted from '6:17pm bells' local time, Munday 6th Novembaa 2023 in Dusseldorf, Jawmaneee!

Düsseldorf 

*The flight from Toon airport to Dusseldorf took less than 2 hours and we are stayin in a hotel close to the airport

We are ‘on the hoy’ here tooneet, az there are loads of boozers in the city centre!🍺🍺🍺🍺

And then onward to Dortmund via the snail 🐌 🚂 train tomorrow, (coz it’s free if yoo have a match ticket!) where we are gannin to groundhop to watch wor U19s play Dortmund U19s at their Brakel trainin groond, in the UEFA Youth Leegue, before the main event at the 81,000 capacity Signal Iduna  Park Stadium later on! ((2 new groonds within a few hours iz unprecedented for The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers!)🤪👍

Keep watchin this space for boozer photos Thats IF the internet here lets The Geordie Times send the photos?

Dusseldorf (we stopped here for a few liquid lubrications🤪👍🍺🍺🍺🍺)

Of course those of yoo who arnt here will be glued to the telly back home and around the globe to watch the match!

Dusseldorf 

There won’t be match reports til we get back on Wedinzday, az tryin to dee match reports on a smaall mobile telling 📱 bone 🍖 iz not eeezy—much eezier to dee it on a laptop 💻! When we get back!

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THE TOON 1 THE ARSE 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2023-2024

 Posted from 'high noon bells' Sunday 5th Novembaa 2023 onwards

Buglers plays ‘The Last Post’ before kick off!

*"FINE LINES AND 3 VAR’s!"

Havin lost 8 of wor last 10 home games v The Arse, winnin just 2 of them, it woz always gannin to be a tough game!

And so it proved az we battled on in the forst half! Wilson had a great chance at The Leazes End, but Sky’s his shot from close in!

*And then the flashpoint when Arsenal’s Martinez (correction! Havertz went in 2 footed on Longstaff near the Toon dugout! ( Thanx to Russ for spotting my dillllibrit mistayk yet again!)

A certain red card—but NO! Atwell the ref just showed a yellow to the fury of the Toon players—3of which got yellows because of the protests! The injustice of it aall!!!

*Bruno then had a runnin battle with a couple of Arsenal players and woz lucky not to get a red himself after usin his elbow a couple of times!

A bad tempered 1st half for certain!

Controversy happened in the 64th minute, when Anthony Gordon fired a loose baall into the net from very close range!

VAR got involved in THREE potential incidents to disallow the goal! Baall oot of play, possible offside and a foul by Joelinton!

After an agonising 5 minute wait the goal woz eventually given to the delight of the Toon players and fans and the fury from The Arse players and their manager Arteta!

Toon fans celebrate Gordon’s goal!

We held on with 8 minutes of stoppage time added with loud whistles from the crowd—- and the relief when the full time whistle went! The first time that The Arse had failed to score in 17 games this season AND their first defeat!

Toon fans celebrate az the final whistle gans!

“VAR my Lord—-VAR!”🙏🏻

Attendance: 52,194 (3,200 Arseholes)

“Boo! Hooo! It’s not fair!”

 

SPOT THE DIFFERENCE!

THE TOON v THE ARSE *** TEATIME TODAY!

 Posted 'high noon bells' Saturday 4th Novembaa 2023

Last season NUFC lost 0-2 to The Arse at SJP ---

Lets hope we can dee much better this time!

It haz certainly been a hectic period for fixtures and just 3 days after wor great Leegue Cup win at Moan U on Wedinzday, we face The Arse at SJP today, in a Premyaa Leegue clash at '5:30 bells' for live telly!

And then next week we fly from Toon airport to Dusseldorf on Munday for wor Champions Leegue game v Dortmund on Tuezday, fly back on Wedinzday afternooon and then prepare for wor langest Premyaa Leegue away trip to Bournemoooth on Saturday, at '5:30 bells', and then homeward bound next Sunday!

We expect a raft of changes from Wedinzday and it will be very interestin to see the startin line up which iz released an hour before kick off!  

Wor home record against them iz shockin, az we have lost 8 oot of the last 10 games---winnin just 2 of them!

A full Geordie Times match report on today's game will appear here on Sunday, but it might be langer to dee the Dortmund report az we are away 3 days for that one!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

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MOAN U MUPPETS 0 THE TOON 3 *** LEEGUE CUP 4th ROOND

 Posted '3:37pm bells' Thorzday 2nd Novembaa 2023

This iz just 5 mins after Willock’s goal in the 60th minute to put NUFC 3-0 up!

"REVENGE IZ SWEET!"

Toon players and fans celebrate at the end of the match, while the letters in the seats can be read with hardly any Moan U fans left inside ‘The Theatre of Muppets’

For the first time ever, ah woz confident that NUFC could beat Moan U at their place—-but when ah saw the team line up, with just 3 of the players who started at Wolves last Saturday included, ah had 2nd thoughts!—how wrang ah woz!

Dead simple—we started off on the front foot and never took it off the excelorator!

5th minute: Matt 🎯 Targett pulls up with wot looks like a hamstring injury and iz replaced by Almiron (which turns oot to be a blessing in disguise 🥸!) ⬇️

28th minute: Livramento races doon the pitch and sends a pin point pass to Miggy Almiron who holds off a home defender to hit a sweet left foot shot across the goal into the far corner of the net in front of The Stratford End!

36th minute: Joe Willock sends a cross into the box and McGuire heeds oot, straight to 19 year old Lewis Hall, who hits a great left footed shot into the corner of the goal to double wor lead and get his first senior goal for the Toon!

The 2nd period woz the same and on the hour mark Joelinton puts a foot in to win the baall, which falls to Joe Willock—He gans on a run and hits a fantastic shot past in the Milan U goal to send the 7,000 plus Toon fans behind that goal into meltdown!

“3-nil to The Geordie boys!”

It’s at this point that their fans get oot of their seats and (virtually!) stampede towards the exits! (See top picture!)

It seemed unreal!—it woz 10 years since we last won here and just the 2nd time we have won here in 51 years!

A game that will live in wor memories forevermore!

Attendance: 72,484 (7,300 jubilant Toon fans!)

Pegswood Geordies actually! Not Egswood! (Pegswood iz a village in Northumberland)

PS: The draw for the qwaataa final wasn’t kind (again!) and paired us with Chelsea—AWAY!

Spotted in the away section wearin specs. Fairs Cup winning captain Bobby Moncur!⬇️

Footnote:

PUB CRAWL PIX   3 visited runnin total 43 (aalso visited Heaton Park which woz visited v Man City so we cannot include it )

RIP DINZZY

Loyal Toon fan ‘Dinzzy’ (Aiden Brannan) haz passed away!

He travelled home and away to watch us!

This iz very sad news indeed!

DINZZY—lost but not forgotten!

THE MOAN U MUPPETEERS v THE TOON **** LEEGUE CUP 4th ROOND **** TOONEET!

 Posted' high noon bells' Wedinzday 1st Novembaa 2023

THE HOME SECTION THE LAST TIME WE WERE HERE!

A canny selection from Dublin, Exeter, Wales, Scotland, China, Alnwick, Chelmsford, Outer Mongolia and of course, LONDON!

We travel across the Pennines to mancland for a Leegue Cup tie at the ridiculous time of 8:15 bells' for live telly, just to make sure that we cannit get back yem by public transport!

SO! we are settin' off in mee 'canny 9 seater tranny' very soon and are stoppin in a hotel on the ootskirts of eest Manchester! (Then a tram to 'The Theatre of Muppets'!)

We expect a raft of changes to the startin line up at Wolves and expect Moan U to dee the same!

An injury crisis iz engulfing NUFC with 7players unavailable due to various ailments

The Mancs will be on a massive 'downer' after their 3-0 defeat at home to arch rivals Man C on Sunday and we expect a somber home crowd for the occasion!

7,300 away tickets have been sold and many more would have attended if they had given us a bigger allocation!---At £38 for an adult ticket, this iz still cheaper than wot they charged us 10 years ago in the same competition----a ridiculous £45! 

A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear here sometime on Thorzday!---Az per usual---"Watch this space!" 

THE HALLOWEEN BAG JINX STRIKES AGAIN!

 Posted 'high noon bells' on Halloween Munday 31st Octobaa 2023

HAZ A GHOST NICKED MY BAG?"

9 years ago on Halloween 2014, Colonel Gadaffi (NOT the one from Libya---the one from Bracknell in Berkshire!) stopped owerneet for wor game v Livaapoool and when he went back to hiz hotel he foond hiz owerneet bag woz missin from hiz room! Had a Halloween ghost nicked it, or wot? (He'd went to the wrang floor!)

This time before wor game v Villa he left hiz bag on the number 11 bus on hiz way to hiz west end hotel in Newcasil----He had to gan to Argos and buy anothaa one plus some toiletries and a change of clothes!

The Livaapool one iz a classic and we have reproduced it again on the Halloween annivorsary (see below)

THE TOON 1 THE LIVERBIRDS 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2014-2015

Posted '11:15am bells' Sunday 2nd November 2014

Reposted 'high noon bells' Halloween 2023

"WHO'S BEEN SLEEPING IN MY BED?"

John 'The Undertaker's' funeral had been the day before and 'The Colonel' (he's 'the spit' of deposed 'crackpot' Colonel Gadaffi!) waz stoppin' owerneet in The Rowers Hotel in Dunston to go the funeral and then the match against The Liverbirds the next day. (He lives in Bracknell in Berkshire)

We'd had quite a few drinks in celebration of 'The Undertaker's' life and after hiz funeral in The Toon and after a canny few drinks in various hostelries, I showed 'The Colonel where the hotel waz on the Friday evenin' and he dropped hiz owerneet bag off in 'Room 1' on the 1st floor of the hotel.

Az he waz droppin' hiz bag off  aa asked the hotel manager if he waz full that neet!  "We're fully booked", he said,  "But some of our business guests have been unavoidably delayed and won't get here til the mornin'!" <(an important point---reeed on!)

We then went on 'the hoy' in Dunston takin' in The Royal Hotel bar and The Tudor Rose bar where a Halloween party waz takin' place with the locals dressed up az ghouls, witches and devils with horns stickin' oot of their heeds and there waz even one idiot in a gorilla suit!

"THERE'S A GHOST IN THE HOUSE!" *** TUDOR ROSE

"Have yoo seen them?" 'The Colonel' said, and I told him that this waz the NORMAL dress attire in Dunston!

Anyway!---aa finally left him in a dishevelled and inebriated state 'late on' and arranged to meet him the next mornin' @ '10 bells' to gan to the match which kicked off @ '12:45 bells'

"Yi'll nevaa guess wot happened to me last night!?" he said when he torned up---and aa had visions of him tellin' me that he couldn't find hiz way back to the hotel!

But a more bizarre set off events had taken place!

He DID find the hotel and went to hiz room (which he'd forgot to lock!?) and 'crashed oot' "ZZZZZzzzzz!!!!!"

Next mornin' he awoke and opened the curtains and he could see that he had a view of the River Tyne from hiz window!
He couldn't understand why, az when he had went to hiz room the previous night to drop hiz bag off, he had a view of the road that leads to Dunston's futbaall groond?

He decided he needed a shave and went to get hiz owerneet bag which he'd left on a chair beside the bed---but it wasn't there!---he searched the room and even looked under the bed to see if it waz there---but it wasn't!???----(it waz Halloween wasn't it---spooky!) Someone must have sneaked in and 'nicked it' while he waz asleep, he thought and he went doon to reception to complain to the manageress of the hotel!

She went back upstairs with him and like a scene from 'Goldilocks and the Three Bears', she discovered that in fact he'd went back to the WRANG ROOM when he'd came back and had slept in the WRANG BED!--hence the 'Tyne view' he had and 'ne bag' in the room! <(yi couldn't make it up!)

Obviously the room he'd slept in WAZ for the (still un-arrived!) business people the hotel manager had told me aboot the neet before!

Imagine the scenario if the delayed business people HAD arrived orly in the mornin'???---A Beautiful blonde bimbo businesswoman arrives exhausted and gans to hor room!
She hoys hor 'kit off' and dives into bed--anly to discover a 'Colonel Gadaffi' lookalike snorin' hiz heed off on the next pillow!
A 'Halloween Horror Story' if ever there waz one!!!!  



Anyway!---off we set for The Toon and he got 'a load of merciless stick', aboot it, aa can tell yiz!

It waz then 'match time' and we heeded for wor seats.
The Toon started off the better of the 2 sides and went close on a couple of occasions. The Liverbirds were not very good and couldn't muster a shot durin' the 1st half and they were lucky not to be behind at the interval when at least one penalty decision went against us!

THE TOON ATTACK THE LEAZES END (1st HALF)

The visitors were a bit better in the 2nd period but The Toon stuck in and went for 'the jugular'.
The breakthrough came in the 73rd minute when a Sissoko pass was blocked by Mereno, but it fell nicely for Perez and he whacked the baall into the net from just inside the box to put us one-nil up, to huge roars from the crowd!

It shud have been two just eight minutes later when Cabella waz put through by Sissoko and with anly Mignonet to beat in The Liverbirds goal he shot by the keeper managed to push the baall around the post to deny him!

It 'mattered not' though!---and we held on to record wor FOURTH win in a row and move up to the dizzy heights of 11th in the table!

ACTION @ THE GALLOWGATE END DURIN' THE 2nd HALF

After the match me and 'The Colonel' heeded for 'The Bodega on Westgate Road where he left hiz owerneet bag under a table!

Sometime later he looked for it, but (again!) it wasn't there? and had mysteriously moved by itself to an alcove above a door!----very spooky! 

"HOW DID THAT GET UP THERE!???"

Toon team: Krul, Janmaat, Coloccini, Steve Taylor, Dummett, Sissoko, Abeid, Colback, Obertan (Aarons 27), Cisse (Perez 46), Sammy Ameobi (Cabella 66)

Attendance: 52,166 (3,200 Liverbirds)