Tuesday, 14 May 2019

"IT WOZ 50 YEARS AGO TODAY!"---I WENT TO SEE NEWCASIL PLAY!"

Posted '3:50am bells' Tuesday 14th May 2019

Amazingleee!---it woz fifty years ago to the day where meesel and 2 mates hitch-hicked to Glasgow to see The Toon play Rangers in the Inter Cities Fairs Cup semi final 1st leg!

I woz 14 years old at the time and still at skool!

A match report iz printed below of the events that happened that day in 1969!

Sunday, 12 May 2019

FULIM 0 THE TOON 4 **** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2018-2019

Posted '8:18pm bells ' Sunday 12th May 2019 on the train back from London
Updated '1:00pm bells' Munday 13th May 2019

"WHEN THE BOAT COMES IN!"
"MESSIN' ABOUT ON THE RIVER!"

The Toon won 4-0, but I've had a canny bit to drink and will de the match report tomorrow!  "Hic!"😨

Update Munday
Forst of aall , apologeeeez for not doin' the match report on the train back yem----I had consumed a rather large amount of 'liquid lubrication' before and after the MAGnificent 4-0 ower Fulim at Craven Cottage yesterday afternoon!

Before the game we heeded for Putney which iz across the Thames from Fulim's groond, which sits on the very edge of the river, where we settled doon in the beer garden of The East Putney Tavern az the 'current bun' shon brightly in the blue sky above!
BAR 121: PUTNEY, LONDON

It woz soon time to heed for 'The Cottage' and az we crossed Putney Bridge to get to the groond a flotilla of 6 boats carryin' 1,300 noisy Toon fans on a 'booze cruise' passed under the bridge!

That woz nearly half wor 2,700 ticket allocation 'messin aboot on the river'!
On enterin' the 'Putney End' of the groond (where else after drinkin' in Putney?) we made for the away section and could see that the 'neutral section' next to us woz full of Toon fans az well!---(so much for tryin' to stop us from buyin tickets there, then!)

A fantastic torn oot for a meaningless last game of the season and with 5,000 fans in this end we made one hell of a racket az the teams ran oot for the start of the game!

Rafa got hiz usual "We want yoo to stay!" message from the fans az he crossed the pitch to the dugoots! (but will he???)

We attacked the far 'Hammersmith End' in the forst half and it took just 9 minutes to break the deadlock when Jonjo Shelvey hit an unstoppable shot into the top right hand side of the net, from a Matt Richie corner to send the 5,000 'faithful' into raptures! It woz soon 2-0 when Prerez scrambled the baall into the goal after an Atsu shot woz blocked---and it stayed that way til half time!
IT'S HALF TIME AND 2 'RAFA'S GAN FOR A BREAK!


Relegated Fulim were second best in aall departments and it woz soon 3-0 when Schar heeded into the net from a Richie corner in front of the Toon fans on the hour mark!---game ower for certain!
MATT RICHIE SENDS IN A CORNER WITH FAB SCHAR 
WAITIN' TO HEED INTO THE NET FOR WOR 3rd GOAL
(Schar iz in the far left of picture in wor away maroon and blue strip)


A 4th goal woz added in stoppage time (to put it beyond doubt!) when Salamon Rondon hit a shot across the box after his original shot rebounded back to him to send 'The Boat People' and the rest of 'The Land Lubbers' into rapturous applause!

This woz wor forst win against a London side this season after 11 failed attempts--and woz wor forst win in the capital since we beat West Ham 3-2 ower a year ago!

NUFC finished the season in 13th place with 45 points!
What happens next season depends on a rather large person sittin' in the Fulim directors box! (ie: wor beloved owner? 'The Fat Controller'!) (who got quite a bit of stick off us ---to say the least!)

PS: When the 'armada' of boats passed the Houses of Parliament, fans on board started singin', "Yoo don't know wot yer doin'!", in reference to the 'Brexit fiasco'!

After the game we heeded for Hammersmith just up the road from the groond where the '100 away pub crawl challenge' continued!

By the time we caught the train from King's Cross we had visited a grand total of 125 drinkin dens since the beginning of the season!

Toon team: Dubravka, Schar, Dummett (Kenedy 81), Lascelles, Hayden (Fernandez 69), Diame, Shelvey, Ritchie, Rondon, Perez, Atsu (Muto 66)

Attendance: 24,979 (5,000 Toon fans, including 1,300 'Boat People'!)  


The post match 'gargels' took place here, bringin' wor final total of away pubs to 125!


122: HAMMERSMITH, LONDON

123: BELGRAVIA, LONDON

124: BELGRAVIA, LONDON

125: KING'S CROSS, LONDON

Friday, 10 May 2019

FULIM v THE TOON **** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2018-2019 *** THIS SUNDAY AFTERNOOON!

Posted '4:39pm bells' Friday 10th May 2019

"THE LAST CHANCE SALOON!"
(The last chance to win a game against a London side!)

We heed for 'the smoke' (London) yet again on Sunday for wor last game of the season, where we take on relegated Fulim at Craven Cottage.

It's been a lang expensive season again with trips to Barrow, Ireland, Cornwall (U18s tournament), Portugal and aall the leegue and cup away games, plus a smatterin' of resorve games!

Wor trip to King's Cross (London) will be wor 13th visit to the capital this season, includin' games at Wotfaad, Sooothampton, Bournemoooth, Brightin, Woking (U23s) where we changed trains, plus we travelled to and back from Portugal through London az well!  (6 games in London---West Ham, Chelski, Arsenal, Sporz, Palace and Fulim!)

In othaa words WE NEED A REST!😴

Many Toon fans were rejected tickets in the Fulim neutral end by their north east poscodes, but we naa that there are quite a few who DID manage to get tickets for that section, who live 'doon the south'!.
We sold aall wor 2,700 tickets for the away end within a day and will have at least a thoosand in othaa parts of the groond on Sunday!

Wor record against London teams this season iz trueleee shockin'!
11 games played home and away and not a single victory!
Wor record iz: played 11, won 0, drawn 2, lost 9, points 2!😨
Fulim will be wor last chance to record a victory ower a London club! (PS: We have beaten Wotfaad, but Wotfaad iz a town in itself and iz NOT in London!)

The trains back are aall 'dry' (ne alcohol) az LNER (London & North Eastern Railways) haz said there woz trouble after the game in February v Sporz at Wembley and have inforced the ban because of this!
But hang on a minute!---since then, we have travelled to London via King's Cross FOWER (4) times since, to West Ham, Bournemoooth, Arsenal and Brightin and alcohol woz freely available! (ie: WHY were these trains not 'dry' az well???) 

I will attempt to de a brief match report on the '8 bells' train back on Sunday neet---A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Munday!

Thursday, 9 May 2019

NUFC U23s IN 2 CUP FINALS!

Posted '3:10pm bells' Tuesday 7th May 2019
GOODISON PARK

Tomorrow neet wor U23 side heed for Morseyside where we will play Evaatin at Goodison Park in The Premyaa Leegue Cup Final!

Updated Thorsday '2:47pm bells'
  
"ONE FOR SORROW!--TWO FOR JOY?"

Unfortunately we lost 1-0 at Evaatin last neet when Morgan Feeney scored the anly goal of the game for the Morseysiders in the 59th minute to lift the cup!


HOWEVER!--next Munday 13th May @ '7:00 bells' wor U23s heed for Sooothampton where they will play at St Mary's Stadium in the play off final for a place in the top flight of The U23s Premyaa Leegue!
ST. MARY'S STADIUM

These are both 'one off' games where a draw woz made to determine where the finals will be played!
Unfortunately we got 'the short straw' on both occasions!

Az both these venues are places we have visited many times before for forst team games, most of 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' will give them a 'miss'!

That meeenz that wor forst team away game v Fulim next Sunday will be the very last game of the season for us!

This meeenz that wor epic away 'pub crawl challenge' will end next Sunday in London!
Wor total so far iz 120 away drinkin' dens and we plan to add at least 5 more to the total by the time we catch the last train back from King's Cross to Tyneside on Sunday neet!

Monday, 6 May 2019

AMAZING HYPOCRISY FROM NUFC!

Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 5th May 2019
FROM TODAY'S 'RONNY GILL'!

"YI COULDN'T MAKE IT UP!" 

Not only woz the kick off time of 7:45 bells' on a Saturday neet a recipe for disaster, (az fans had been drinkin' aall day), but away fans in the home section forthaa fuelled the 'fire' that woz to follow!

For weeks and weeks NUFC fans had been warned NOT to sell tickets to Liverpoool fans, desperate to gain admission to see them possibly win The Premyaa Leegue for the forst time!

Az it torned oot this wasn't possible, but there were pockets of away fans aall ower the groond, with many of them in The Platinum Club and corporate areas of The Milburn Stand!

It torns oot that NUFC KNOWINGLY sold a block of 200 tickets to Liverpoool fans in one corporate area, statin' that this woz normal procedure for away fans in corporate seats! 

AMAZING HYPOCRISY if yoo ask us---to sell tickets, knowin' that this would undoubtedly cause trouble shud wor visitors score---which they did 3 times!---but the forst 2 goals were not celebrated by them for fear of bein' ejected!
But they couldn't help themselves when the 3rd goal went in with just 4 minutes left on the clock and celebrated wildly!----This resulted in a huge fight below us! (We were in the upper tier of The Milburn Stand)

After the final whistle, fuelled up Toon fans fought with their fans az they attempted to board their coaches home!
22 fans of both clubs were arrested!

"NO!"--- '7:45 bells' kick off times on a Saturday neet are not recommended --- but there will be many many more next season in the new arrangements for live telly, resultin in more disorder around the country, for certain!
TODAY'S RONNY GILL'!

NUFC shud hang their heads in shame for allowin' Liverpoool fans into the corporate areas, while tellin' Toon fans that they would face heavy fines for ticket toutin' and lose their season tickets, if THEY sold them to away fans!
NUFC CLUB STATEMENT!


"HYPOCRISY OF THE HIGHEST ORDER!"

Sunday, 5 May 2019

THE TOON 2 THE LIVERBIRDS 3 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2018-2019

Posted '10:57am bells' Sunday 5th May 2019
THE BIGGEST FLAG IN FUTBAALL IZ UNFURLED
AT THE GALLOWGATE END !

'THE INJUSTICE OF IT AALL!" 

If yoo were a neutral fan then yoo would have had a great days entertainment az both teams went hammer and tongs from the 'off'!
Forst blood woz to wor visitors who took the lead at The Gallowgate End in the 13th minute when an unmarked Van Dijk heeded past Dubravka in the Toon goal to give them the lead.

We fought back and equalised in the 20th minute when Atsu fired home from close range at The Leazes End after Rondon had had hiz shot stopped on the line by the hand of Alexander Arnold!
An instant dismissal shud have followed but because Atsu had scored the rebound the ref took no action against him?---The injustice of it aall!

The Mickey Mousers retook the lead through Salah 8 minutes later with a shot from inside the box!---HT 2-1 to them!

We came oot with 'aall guns blazin' in the 2nd half and equalised again in the 54th minute trough Rondon who hit a sweet left footer past Alisson in The Liverbirds goal to send the crowd into raptures!

This 'end to end game' ended with a dive from Liverpoool's Fabinho az Ritchie shadowed him!---Richie protested loudly to the linesman who woz close by, but the free kick woz given anyway!
The resultin' free kick 4 mins from time woz heeded in by Origi at The Leazes End---the injustice of it aall!

There woz then fightin' below us in the corporate areas of The Milburn Stand az Liverpoool fans had managed to get tickets for those areas and who celebrated their winnin goal!

8 minutes of stoppage time (Salah woz stretchered off) meant a nailbitin' time for the 3,200 Scousers in level 7 of The Leazes End, (and elsewhere!) before the ref finally blew for full time!

The result and results elsewhere meeenz that NUFC can finish ne higher than 13th and ne lower than 15th with 1 game left away to Fulim next Sunday. (we are currently 14th)
Liverpoool move 2 points clear at the top, with just 1 game to gan---but of course if Man City win their 2 remain' games then they will be champions again!

Toon team: Dubravka, Manquillo, Lascelles, Schar (Muto 90), Dummett, Ritchie, Hayden, Ki, Atsu, Perez, Rondon

Attendance: 52,206 (3,200 Mickey Mousers in Leazes End plus a couple of hundred more in the home sections!)

*

Friday, 3 May 2019

"ANOTHAA FINE MESSI !"

Updated'2:43pm bells' Friday 3rd May 2019

"THE PRESSURE IZ ON THEM, NOT US!"

The Liverbirds 3-0 hammerin' in The Champions Leegue at the hand of Barcelona on Wedinzday neet---and Lionel MESSI in particular (who scored hiz 599th and 600th goals for Barca!), must have put a massive dent in their confidence and belief that they are virtually invincible!

This iz good news for NUFC in wor bid to beat them for the 2nd time in 3 days!
The crowd will be 'up for it' az the late Saturday kick off time will meen that fans will have been drinkin' aall day, which aalways makes for a better atmosphere than say a '12:30 bells' kick off, with little chance of a pint (or 10!) before the match! 

Klopp wanted the late kick off time to aid hiz teams recovery time, and this could well backfire on the Jawman manager!
Liverpoool haven't won on Tyneside in their last 4 visits---and just once in their last 7 visits to SJP: (a 0-6 win! 7 years ago! "Ouch!") (In the last 7 visits NUFC have won 4, drawn 2, lost 1)

Aalso, Liverpoool CANNIT win the leegue at 'wor place' and so the demand for tickets from their fans will be nee way az high az woz envisaged!
Ayoze Perez iz expected to retorn after gannin off injured at Brightin, az iz Lascelles who woz unwell for that game.
A draw or a defeat for them, will aalmost certainly hand the Premyaa Leegue title to Man City once more---who divvint play till Munday!

ie: The pressure iz definatly on them and not us, az we have nothin' to play for, apart from leegue position and we will finish the season between 11th and 16th---dependant on othaa results!

Fans have aalso been urged by Alan Shearer to sign a petition in 'The Ronny-Gill' newspaper to keep Rafa at the club!---We can anly hope that this will be successful OR a downward spiral will surely follow if yet anothaa 'yes man' iz appointed az manager!
To sign the petition gan to: bit.ly/rafanufc

We at The Geordie Times just don't know wot will happen at this crazy comedy club!

A Geordie Times match report will appear here on Sunday az per usual!


"TOON! TOON! BLACK N WHITE ARMY!"

News that the othaa Tyneside 'black n whites', Gatesheed FC, are to change their name to Gateshead Town, after fans voted to form a new club in protest at the runnin' doon of their club by Cala, their far east owner!
They will play at eethaa The International Stadium in Gatesheed OR Kingston Park in Newcasil! (the home of Newcasil Falcons Rugby Club)

We wish them well in their new adventure!

Tuesday, 30 April 2019

GOOD OLD JOEY BARTON!😅😆😂

Posted '10:00pm bells' Tuesday 30th April 2019

Full time from Highbury Stadium
home of 'The Cod Army'!
Fleetwood Town 2
SMBs 1
Fleetwood's winnin' goal woz scored in the 95th minute!😄


FTM (Fleetwood Town Marra!😊)

Sunday, 28 April 2019

'NE WHERE NEAR' BRIGHTIN 1 THE TOON 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2018-2019

Posted from '9:10am bells' Sunday 28th April 2019 on train back from King's Cross in London
For an update on Munday April 29th, scroll doon the page!
!st HALF ACTION AZ THE TOON ATTACK THE FAR GOAL

Due to the fact that this train iz chocker there will anly be a brief match report az I can hardly move!

Ayoze Perez hit a sweet right footed shot into the net in the 18th minute after Rondon had chested the baall doon to give The Toon the lead!
We were on the rampage in this half and shud have had at least 2 more goals, but couldnt add to Perez'z strike!
(Perez woz taken off injured in the 32nd minute which changed wor approach to the game in the 2nd period)
2nd HALF ACTION AZ WE ATTACK THE GOAL IN FRONT OF THE TOON FANS
(THE TOON ARE IN BLUE AND MAROON CHANGE STRIP)

The 2nd half woz a different story az we took wor foot off the gas and let Brightin back into the game!

They equalised in the 75th minute when Gross had a free header az wor defence woz in disarray!

Attendance:30,687 (2,500 Toon fans)

Thats it for now folks!--- az there's hardly room to swing a black cat by the tail!

A full match report will follow sometime tomorrow!

Updated 'high noon bells' Munday 29th April

The Saturday had started off with mee finishin' my nightly truck run to Manchester!---I got to bed at '3:00am bells' "ZZZzzz!!!"---and got up again at '7:00am bells' to catch the 8:58 bells' train to King's Cross (London)

It woz then onward to Lewes in Sussex where we had wor customary pre math gargels in the numerous pubs near the train station! (just 3, actually!) (see pix below)
The reason we went to Lewes and not Brightin, woz because it iz easier to get to The AMEX Stadium in Falmer from there, than it iz from  Brightin train station (and aboot the same distance, 7 miles)
(Now yi naa why we call them 'Ne Where Near' Brightin!)

It woz then onward to Falmer where the train woz mostly full of Toon fans!
Orlier we'd hord that the SMBs had drawn with Portsmoooth and that Barnsleee had won which meant that the mackems would aalmost certainly miss oot on automatic promotion and settle for the lottery of the Leegue 1 play-offs
This had the Toon fans in buoyant mood and az we reached the groond the Brightin fans were aalso in a buoyant mood az they hord that Cardiff had lost at Fulim, which meeenz that they were virtually safe from relegation! (not quite, actually!)

The brief match report above iz not worth addin' tee, except we shud have had at least one penalty but the ref Toon fans love to hate, Mike Dean waved protest from Toon players away!

A 1-1 draw woz probably a fair result in the end, but it shud reeely have been 'aall 3' to 'us', after wor 1st half showin'!

Toon team: Debravka, Manquillo, Schar, Fernandez, Dummett, Ritchie, Hayden, Shelvey (Ki 73), Atsu (Muto 80), Perez (Kenedy 32), Rondon


"ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY---THAT'S MORE THAN PLENTY!"

116 THE LANSDOWN ARMS, LEWES (Pre match
(Packed with Toon fans!)

117 THE BREWERS ARMS, LEWES

118 THE RIGHTS OF MAN, LEWES


After the match we heeded back to London where the post match drinks were consumed in 2 boozers near near Lords cricket groond in 'St Johns Wood, 
119 DUKE OF YORK, ST JOHNS WOOD, LONDON (Post match)
(This boozer wouldn't take cash!---credit cards only!)

120 ELGIN, ST JOHNS WOOD, LONDON

bringin' wor seasons total (so far) to 120 different away boozers visited throughout the season!--- we then heeded back to wor hotel near Euston (London) for a good neets kip
"ZZZZZzzzzz!!!!!" before catchin' the '9:00am bells' train back from King's Cross the next mornin'!

The brief match report woz then done on the train yesterday!
The train woz packed, az the previous train to wors woz cancelled and everybody off the cancelled train had to catch wors, which meant severe overcrowdin' for the jorney back to Tyneside!

Thursday, 25 April 2019

NE WHERE NEAR BRIGHTIN V THE TOON *** SATURDAY TEATIME

Posted '3:10pm bells' Friday 26th April 2019

"RELAX AND CHILL OOT!"

Tomorrow we heed for The AMEX Stadium in Falmer in Sussex, which iz 'ne where near' Brightin (hence wor name for them!) where the home side will be full of jitters in their bid to escape the drop, which iz now between 3 clubs to avoid the last relegation place, namely, Sooothampton, Cardiff and Brightin

NUFC of course are now safe from relegation, so we can relax and chill oot, while Brightin fans bite their fingernails and pull their hair oot ', hopin against hope that Cardiff in particular don't gain ground on them with just 3 point between the sides!

It's great to gan to a game and not worry aboot othaa results isn't it?
The away section iz again completely sold oot, despite the '5:30 bells' kick off time and 700 mile roond trip!---This iz the 5th time we have been to 'The Amex'--- and guess wot?--this iz the 5th time that this fixture haz been moved to a daft kick off time for live telly!!!

Miguel Almiron iz oot for the last 3 games with a hamstring injury, so Jonjo Shelvey could well make a retorn to the side!
Florian Lejeune iz aalso unavailable az iz Sean Longstaff of course, while Fabian Schar and Isaac Hayden should be fit!

MEEENWHILE!
Wor home game v The Liverbirds a week tomorrow sold oot within 4 hours of gannin on sale!
Toon fans have been told in no uncertain torms that they should NOT sell their tickets to Liverpoool fans or else they could face huge fines for ticket toutin' and have their season ticket cancelled for the future!

If yoo thought the prices for wor away game v Fulim on the last day of the season were obscene---then "look away now!" at the prices bein' quoted on one 'spivs website' for Liverpoool tickets orlier this week! (Before Man City beat Moan U!)


OWER 'A GRAND' TO SIT IN THE STAND?
"LETS RE-MORTAGE THE HOUSE!"

It shud be noted that The Scousers CANNIT win the title at 'wor place', even if they beat 'uddersfeeeld tooneet (highly probable) and Man City lose at Bornley on Sunday (highly improbable).
Liverpoool would then be 5 points clear if this happened---BUT with 6 points still to play for in the title race it wouldn't be 'done and dusted'! (ie:It's Impossible for them to win the title at SJP)
Which meeenz that demand for the ridiculously priced tickets, will surely 'drop like a stone'!

A full 'Geordie Times' match report from Brightin will appear here on Sunday, az we travel back on the train from London (where we are stayin', coz we cant get back on Saturday, coz of the daft kick off time!)

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