Wednesday, 25 July 2018

THE IMPOSSIBLE DREAM!

Posted '1:55pm bells' Thorsday 26th July 2018
Sheff Wed

Hartlepool

On Friday 1st August 2003 NUFC left the 'mad-sad groundhoppers' with an impossible task--- for the 1st team squad were playin TWO teams at different venues!
One team was sent to Hartlepool where we won 6-0 with Shearer gettin a hat-trick---while the other team went to Hillsborough where Sheff Wed won 4-3 at the SAME TIME!

CONFUSED?  Well these were the two team line ups-- no subs used in eethaa game!
At Hartlepool John Carver woz in charge of the followin 11:
Given, Griffin, Bernard, Woodgate, S Caldwell, Solano, Jenas, Speed, Shearer, Bellamy, Robert!

At Sheff Wed Bobby Robson woz in charge of the followin 11:
Harper, Hughes, A O'Brien, Bramble, Elliott, Lua Lua, Viana, Dyer, Bowyer, Cort, S Ameobi

Az yoo can see both teams were full of quality players! (Compare that to the players we have now just 15 years later!)

John 'The Undertaker' who woz tragically killed on hiz way to New Zealand in 2014 took me in hiz car---to!----The Sheff Wed game!
"Why are we comin here and not Hartlepool?" I asked him curiously?
"Because Bobby Robson iz wor manager!"
he replied!

The Undertaker hadnt missed a 1st team competitive or friendly game in Britian since 1973!--- so Hartlepool woz the forst he'd missed since then!

Aalso on Saturday 28th November 2015 wor U21s lost 3-0 v Stoke at MACCLESFIELD, while the 1st team were gettin hammered 5-1 at Cristil Paliss!

Its the ANLY current leegue groond where a Newcasil team have played that aa havvint been te!

ie: Again, yi cannit be in 2 places at the same time and 1st team competitive games get priority!

This Saturday we play Porto in Portugal and are flyin there on Friday.
We booked the flight back on Munday---and then NUFC arranged anothaa game there v Braga at the last minute, for next WEDNESDAY!
So that will be anothaa new groond 'doon the swanny' for me! (There iz 'ne way' aa can de it!)
We play Rangers U23s at their trainin groond next Munday--BUT! Its behind closed doors!

Those who are stayin in Portugal for the 2 games couldnt get to the Rangers game anyway, even if woz open to the public!

Like aa say   yi cannit possibly 'de them aall'!😨


THE TIGER LILLYS 2 THE TOON 2 *** FRIENDLY

Posted '1:42pm bells' Wednesday 25th July 2018

"SAME OLD, SAME OLD!"

Several youngins played in this one, includin Yarney, Roberts, Fernandez and Sterry. The rest of the senior player were here az well from last season, apart from wor South Korean import Ki Sung-yueng.

We took the lead in the 15th minute when Joselu fired into the net from a Shelvey through baall!

Hull levelled things just before the break when Kane tapped in! (NO! not THAT Kane!)

The home side took the lead in the 2nd half after The Toon made several changes, when Evendro vollied home!

The ANLY new face in wor team, Ki Sung-yueng then made hiz debut in the 69th minute and woz key in wor equaliser!
A corner taken by him foond Perez who sidefooted the baall into the net for a late leveller!

(In total 20 players got some game time, 19 who were here last season!)

Toon players who got some game time:
Darlow, Woodman, Yedlin, Sterry, Lascelles, Clark, Yarney, Hayden, Roberts, Manquillo, Shelvey, Sung-yueng, Diame, Fernandez, Murphy, Aarons, Langstaff, Ritchie, Joselu and Perez!😨
Attendance: 5,000 (est)   2,000 or so Toon fans *
Thanx to Glennn from Ashington for pix


Tuesday, 24 July 2018

THE TIGER LILLYS v THE TOON TOONEET!

Posted '2:10pm bells' Tuesday 24th July 2018
The last time we were here
Leegue Cup qwaataa finals 
December 2016
Lost 3-1 on pens after
stalemate at 1-1

The Toon travel to eest Yorkshire tooneet to take on Hull in wor 2nd forst team pre season friendly!
With still ne breakthrough in the transfor market for a quality striker with less than 3 weeks of the 'window' left, theeze are worryin times for aall Toon fans!
YET AGAIN!---The silence is deafennnin from SJP!

Rumour haz it that season ticket sales are doon by 5,000!

Many fans have had enough and are votin' with their feet aboot 'non transfor activity'!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here in due course!

PS: Mee forst ever visit to Hull woz way back in 1976 @ Boothferry Park and an archive match report from that game 42 years ago, iz printed in the next article doon!
(040 boothferry park, hull)

040 boothferry park hull


(GROUND NUMBER 40)



Date of First Visit: 10th AUGUST 1976



BOOTHFERRY PARK, KINGSTON UPON HULL



HULL CITY 0  NEWCASTLE UNITED 0



ANGLO-SCOTTISH CUP

ATTENDANCE 4,715






"DON'T CROSS THAT RIVER!"






The most famous thing that comes from Hull iz the suspension bridge that spans the Humber, SO l-o-n-g, that when they built the towers at each end they had tih be slightly oot of 'sinc' to allow for the curviture of the Earth!.



After that it's the City's two Rugby League clubs, 'Hull' and 'Hull Kingston Rovers'.

The thord best thing tih come from Hull iz said tih be the nightlife in the city centre where 'stag neets' and 'hen does' dee the roonds (not az good az the Bigg Market or Quayside, though!)



Finally!--wih come to 'Hull City F.C.' who were the 'poor relations' of the city, (in the 1970's at least) and who's 'claim tih fame' iz that they come from the largest city in England NEVER to have had a club in the top flight of the Futbaall League with a population of ower twice that of the Toons! (SOME 'claim'?) 




In the 1970's ah used tih gan tih Hull quite regularly in mee Lorry az R.H.M. Flour Mills who ah worked for in Gatesheed (nuw the new Art Centre next tih the Millenium Brigde) had a mill next tih the River Hull which splits the City of Kingston Upon Hull in half.



This in torn leads to the River Humber and to the North Sea beyond.

Hull Rugby League Club play on the west side of the 'Hull' (az do 'Hull City') and hated arch rivels 'Kingston Rovers' on the east side.



Nuw ah mention this for a very good reason, for RHMs' mill in Hull was on the east side of the river.

One winters day while ah was deliverin' tih the Hull mill, ah went tih the canteen for some 'Desperate Dan'.



Az ah waited in the queue, a mill worker clocked mee Toon scarf that ah was wearin' and said:



"YA ON'T WRONG SIDE OF THE RIVER LADDIE!"---"THE WRONG SIDE!"



That's a strange thing tih say tih somebody, ah thought, so ah asked him what he meant?.



"THIS IS 'ROVERS' SIDE OF THE RIVER, GET BACK TO YER OWN SIDE!", he added pointin' at mee scarf.



Then ah 'tumbled' what he meant!. Coz ah was wearin' a black 'n' white scarf he thought ah was a Hull RFC fan. (who play in black 'n' white hoops!)



"NO!---NO!", This iz a NEWCASTLE UNITED scarf!", ah said, pointin' tih the club crest on the front.



"SORRY MATE!"---THOUGHT YOU WERE ONE OF THEM B*******!", he added az he 'sheepishly' scurried away!,  'Pagger' avoid!, and settled doon tih eat mee 'scran' in peace!.



(Who says anly futbaall fans hate each other?)


Anyway!---Wih combined this midweek trip with a weeks boozin' holiday in 'Sunny Scarborough' and 'sunny' iz the reet word!, coz this was the summer of '76' when the heatwave went on for aboot EIGHT WEEKS!, withoot a drop of rain in sight!. (Oh for 'the good old days'!---in this day and age yi'd be lucky if a 'heatwave' lasted for aboot EIGHT HOURS!) (WHATEVER HAPPENED tih wor SUMMERS?)

Wih based worsels at the 'Granby Hotel', a smaall guest hoose not far from the seafront and on wor forst neet wih went on a 'bender' and got totally 'rat-arsed'! (Az yih de!)

This did'nt gan doon well with the guest hoose owner az 'Dylan' hoyed up on the stair carpet!, 'Santy' fell ower and smashed a potted plant on the forst floor landin'!, someone else (who shall remain nameless!) p***** the bed! (NOT me!) and AH fell asleep in a flower bed! in the front garden coz ah could'nt find mee key! (which was just az well coz ah could'nt waalk and would'nt have been able tih climb the stairs, anyway!)

NOT! the kind of 'bed' ah envisaged a'd be sleepin' in---but a 'bed' just the same!)

(GOOD START---EH!?)


Next day az wih 'tiptoed' doon for 'brekkies', (the manager eventually lerriz in, coz he said ah made the garden look untidy!) there were stoney faces and sore heeds aplenty and apologies aall roond!

Afta wor 'bacon'n'eggs' and black coffees wih made wor way tih the sea front for some fresh air tih stop wor heeds spinnin' and tih sober up from the previous neets 'gargel'!

Ah was the one that had tih drive tih Hull that day and ah insisted on havin' a few hours 'off the hootch' before ah got behind the wheel.

The others agreed AND!----'WENT ON THE HOY!' in the 'Newcastle Packet' (a well named 'waaterin' hole' ower the road from the beach) leavin' me tih 'kick mee heels' ON the beach!

("F*****' C***S!")

"YEE GAN AN' GET THE 'JAM JAR' AND WE'LL WAIT HERE FOR YIH!", shouted 'Burnsy' az he knocked back the forst 'Arthur', withoot touchin' the sides!

(like ah said!---"F*****' C***S!")


Afta a bit 'sulk' ah went back tih wor digs tih get mee 'Escort' which was parked in a side street next tih the guesthoose. Ah 'sneaked' past the front window tih avoid the manager az things were still a bit 'frosty' between us afta the previous neets 'shinanaginz'!

Ah picked the lads up (who were canny sorved again!) and wih heeded for Kingston Upon Hull, some forty miles doon the east coast.

On the way wih stopped of at Bridlington for a 'mid-jorney-gargel', (coke for me a'm afraid!---"sulk!"---"sulk!") but the place was 'deed and full of aad biddies and aad gadgies, so wih did'nt stop lang! (we were just 'young pups' in wor orly 20's)

("ER!"---NUW! (some 40 odd years lata)---WE are the 'AAD gadgies'!)

(Time DOES! fly?---aboot ten thoosand miles an hour!---mee thinx!?)

Monday, 23 July 2018

"IT'S JUST LIKE AN OLYMPIC SPORT!"

Posted '1:47pm bells, Munday 23rd July 2018
'OLYMPIC SPORT' GROOND NUMBER 336!
TRUNGLE PARC, MOUSEHOLE, CORNWALL
(AT JUST 10 MILES FROM LANDS END 
IT'S THE MOST SOUTHERLY FUTBAALL GROOND IN BRITAIN!)

A'v just updated mee list of groonds visited watchin NUFCs various teams and the full list iz printed in the article below this one!

The late Paul Tully who woz the former NUFC programme editor and woz aalso a 'NUFC mad-sad groundhopper' himself, said that collectin' new groonds followin' NUFC woz: 
"JUST LIKE AN OLYMPIC SPORT!"

Paul himself had visited 120 odd groonds watchin' The Toon!
RIP TULLY

THE NEVER ENDIN 'OLYMPIC' MARATHON JUST GANS ON! AND ON!---AND ON!

Sunday, 22 July 2018

336 TRUNGLE PARC, MOUSEHOLE

Ground number 336
Date of First Visit: 21st July 2018
Trungle Parc, Paul near Mousehole, Cornwall

Bolton Wanderers U18s  3
Newcastle United U18s  0

Endorsed Cup final
Attendance: 99 (estimated?) 5 mad-sad groundhoppers!) (plus a little doggy in a pram!-honest!)
Mousehole clubhoose!

On gettin to this game I broke the 'world record' for a train jawnee in Ing-er-land followin The Toon!
9 hours 23 minutes from Newcasil to Penzance (28 stops!)
BEAT THAT!

"CORNISH PATSIES!"😨

(Brief match report coz we wornt very good!)

*The Toon U18s were 2nd best az Bolton took the lead after just 4 mins on the clock!
They hit the woodwork twice az they dominated the forst half!
The Toon are in the maroon 
and dark blue hoops

Again after the restart we couldnt get gannin and Bolton increased their lead at the start of the half and with WOR U18s hardly venturing into their half there woz anly gannin to be one winner---and it wasnt 'us'!

It woz 'game ower' not lang after wor oppenents went 3-0 up to win the Endorsed Cup!



                       THE PUB CRAWL STARTED HERE!











AND ENDED BACK HERE!


                                  SOME DAFT PHOTOS!

So mice DO live in Mousehole!😨

The Mousehole clubhoose
tool-shed!
Yiv got to 'hit' the back of the net!

A garden between Mousehole
and Newlyn!



*PS: Aa never made it to Lands End which woz just 10 miles from Mousehole, az I opted to 'gan on the hoy' instead
I flew back from Exeter with 'Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer' and the flight took 50 minutes!

*PPS: There iz ne mention whatsoever aboot this game on the NUFC official website!???

Saturday, 21 July 2018

TOON U23s v HAMILTON ACCIES @ STIRLING

Posted '1:11pm bells' Saturday 21st July 2018 @ Mousehole, Cornwall
Updated Sunday neet on Tyneside!

It Haz been conformed by The Geordie Times'z 'club insider' that wor U23s will play Hamilton @ Stirling University tomorrow afternoon @'3 bells' (Sunday)

Personally, aa cant make the game az aa fly back from Exeter tomorrow afternoon at the same time az the game iz played!😨

A match report from wor game this afternoon v Bolton U18s in Mousehole will be posted later!
"Yi cannit de them aall!"

UPDATED SUNDAY NEET!





A Hamilton X1 beat The Toon U23s by 3 goals to 1 this afternoon @ Stirling University's groond, with Ivan Toney scorin the anly goal for us!  In total 21 players got some game time!
Special thanx to Glennn from Ashington for the pix!

Glennn had been to Mousehole in Cornwall yesterday to witness wor U18s 3-0 defeat in the Endorsed Cup final and caught a train to London after the game and then onward to Glasgow by owerneet coach!--and to Stirling (eventually!)
And yoo thought that 'I' woz a mad-sad groundhopper!

Its ironic to say the least that 'I' told Glennn  and others aboot this "hush!, hush! game!" after I had been informed that it would take place by my 'secret club insider'!

BUT! Aa couldnt gan coz mee flight back from Exeter at '3:00 bells this afternoon (after watchin wor U18s game in Mousehole yesterday), meant that I wouldnt be able to get to Stirling for the match, which aalso kicked off at 3!😨

"SODS LAW!"

UPDATED AGAIN ON MUNDAY

Just read the 'Ronny Gill' and there iz ne mention whatsoever aboot the match!???---If yoo didnt read this 'here' then yoo wouldnt know the match had been played!
(Ne mention whatsoever of this game eethaa, on the club's official site???😨) (Aalso there iz ne mention of the U18s games in Mousehole!???)
ie: Read www.geordietimes.com forst, for "hush! hush!" match reports!😊

Footnote: For the benefit of wor owerseas reeders, the 'Ronny Gill' iz Geordie slang for the Newcasil 'Chronice' newspaper!




MOUSEHOLE TOURNAMENT CUP FINAL

Posted '9:45am bells' Saturday 21st July 2018
Tourist attraction one!

Yesterday The Toon U18s beat 'uddersfield U18s to reach the final of The Endorsed Cup where we will meet Bolton U18s who beat Mousehole FC 4-1 last neet!
We based worsels in Penzance last neet, which iz 5 mikes from Mousehole and az yid expect we visited the local tourist attractions!
Tourist attraction two!

A full match report will appear here sometime this evenin' or tomorrow
The match kicks off at '2:00pm bells'
Tourist attraction three!
(1:00am bells!😨)

*

Friday, 20 July 2018

"LANDS END! LANDS END! HERE WE COME!

Posted '1:07pm bells' Friday 20th July 2018
A PENALTY SHOOTOUT AT MOUSEHOLE LAST SEASON!

Today NUFC U18s will make history when they play a game v 'uddersfield U18s in a place caalled Mousehole in Cornwall in The Endorsed Cup with 4 teams takin part. 'uddersfield U18s, Bolton U18s, The Toon U18s and the home club Mousehole FC

The groond iz just 10 miles from Lands End and iz the most southerly groond on the British mainland!
TRUNGLE PARK, MOUSEHOLE ON 
A NON MICE MATCH DAY!

'Little old me' iz writin' most of this on the '11:42am bells' train from Newcasil to Penzance, az I am gannin for the 2nd game on Saturday, when wor U18s play ethaa Bolton U18s or Mousehole FC at ethaa '11:00am bells or '2:00pm bells' at Trundle Park, Mousehole (kick off time, dependin on wor result later today at '4:00pm bells'  (I will be approx half way there az the match v 'uddersfield iz in progress this afternooon!)


'Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer' iz at todays game and will text me the score az I sit with mee 8 cans of hootch, to get me through the 9 hour plus train ride!

Match report on tomorrows game sometime tomorrow neet!

PS  Av got loads of time to finish the Barrow and St Pats match reports
---9 hours (plus!) actually!😨🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺 That meenz av got to make each can last 70 minutes on average!😥

PPS Just started mee 4th can at Bormingham---its got to last unil '4 25 bells' under mee 'rations system'!😨

UPDATE AT 8:00PM BELLS

The Toon U18s won 3-0 with goals from Cole, White and Young to reach the final tomorrow where they will play eetha Bolton U18s or hosts Mousehole FC (who are playin az I write this at Par  station, Cornwall  (not lang to gan now!😨)

Thursday, 19 July 2018

NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS OUTRAGE!

Posted ''4:00am bells' Thorsday 19th July 2018

The draw for the Checkatrade Trophy haz been made and to the fury of 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' wor resorve U21s have been drawn against 3 teams who's groonds we have been te before and 2 of them wear the famous black n white stripes!
We travel to Donny Rovers, Notts Coonty and Grimsbee in the next couple of months instead of Fleetwood, Rochdale and Macclesfield, where we have never been before!

'The Dibble' have aalso interfered with the forst roond draw and have prevented a possible clash between sund'lind's forst team and The Toon's U21 side, fearin that NUFC fans will take the P**s!
 (Az if we would!😅)

But just suppose that both sund'lind and NUFC U21s progress to the final!
What will they do then!!!???

Its a fix! its a fix! its a fix!
                                                     "Hello! Northumbria police here!
                            There's no way that Newcasil reserves can play sund'lind's first team!"

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