Wednesday, 29 August 2012

LEAGUE CUP DRAW LOOMS!

Posted '4:00pm bells' Wednesday 29th August 2012

The draw for the thord roond of the League Cup iz due to take place tomorrow neet DURIN' wor game against Atromitos in the Europa League @ St James' Park!--so we won't be able to watch it live!

Possible new groonds to visit are Crawley Toon, Burton Albion and MK Dons! <(Carnt wait!) for the prize of a Wembley final!

The draw for wor 'Magical Mystery Tour' of Europe meeenwhile takes place at dinnertime om Friday! (SHUD we get through!???)
The permutations for this however, are 'mind bogglin'!!!

More on the Atromitos game tomorrow!

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

FREDDIE RIP!

Posted '6:10pm bells' Tuesday 28th August 2012

News that wor former chief executive Freddie Fletcher haz 'passed away' haz reached 'The Geordie Times'.
Freddie will best be remembered for formin' The Platinum Club and Bar 1892 in the John Haall era.

He was aalso responsible for the controversial 'bond scheme' where we were telt to cough up £500 to guarantee wor seats for 10 years, anly to be telt later that we were anly guaranteed 'A' seat! (in the smaall print of the bond!)

Wor seats were in The Milburn Stand in line with the Gallowgate 18 yard box and this waz to be renamed Bar 1892 with extortionate price increases.
We refused to pay and were forced to leave wor seats for inferior ones in the rebuilt Milburn Stand 'level 7' with ower 200 stairs to climb to reach wor new seats!
He waz then renamed 'Freddie The Fleece' by irate fans who had lost their prime view seats!
THAT'S what many fans will remember Freddie for!

Sunday, 26 August 2012

KINGS ROAD OAPs 2 THE TOON 0

Posted '2:40pm bells' Sunday 26th August 2012

THE TOON ATTACK THE SHED END

Wor second game in less than 48 hours followin' wor draw against Atromitos of Greece on Thorsday neet started at '5:30 bells', but torrential rain, thunder and lightnin' (in complete contrast to the 100 plus heat of Athens!) threatented to have the game postponed and it wasn't until half an hour before kick off that the rain eased and the old 'current bun' came to wor rescue.


The match however could not be 'rescued' after Torres got a dodgy lookin' penalty for Chelski which waz convorted by Hazard.
The thunder and lightnin' then retorned but it anly fired up the home side and they went 'two up' deep into forst half stoppage time with a fine strike from Torres.

We came oot in the second half with aall guns blazin' but it waz to ne avail despite good chances to score by Cisse and Ba near the end.

Anly TWO of the startin' line up in Athens started here, namely, Anita (makin' his league debut) and Cisse.

Toon team: Krul, Simpson (Ryan Taylor 64), Coloccini, Steven Taylor, Santon (Marveaux 74), Cabye (Perch 77), Anita, Gutierrez, Ben Arfa, Cisse, Ba

Attendance: 41,718 (1,500 Toon fans)

After the match it waz back to King's Cross to catch the last train yem (but not befor gettin' a soakin' waalkin' back to the tube station!) and aa arrived yem at 12:30 am bells on Sunday mornin' havin' left the hoose for Greece at '7:30am bells' on Wednesday mornin'!----It's a hard life gannin on 'the hoy' for fower days! 

ATROMITOS 1 THE TOON 1

Posted 'high noon bells' Sunday 26th August 2012
GOAL!***"RYAN TAYLOR***OWER THE WAALL!"

A much langer version of the match/drink report below will follow later when aa get time!---like!
Chelski report later today---sometime!

(Ground number 290)
Date of First Visit: 23rd August 2012
Municipal Stadium of Peristeri, Athens, Greece

Atromitos 1  The Toon 1 (Ryan Taylor) ("through the waall!"

Europa League 4th Rd Qualifyin' 1st leg

Attendance: eetha! 4,872 or! 5,002? (90 Toon fans ('The Bear' coonted them!) (47 tickets sold from NUFC) (plus! 200 or so watchin' from their balconies!) (Er!--plus a doggie waalkin alang the far terrace! (see photo below!)

"SPOT THE DOGGIE!" (middle of photo)
("Er!"---yi might need a magnifyin' glass!)


"100 IN A ROW!" (Whey!--IF!? yi include the Anglo-Italian Cup!---like!)

The epic and lang jorney to Athens began @ '7:30 am bells' from wor hoose to the bus stop some 100yards distant on Wednesday mornin'!
Then it waz a 10 minute ride to 'The Central' to catch wor train to King's Cross--then anotha train to Gatwick Airport and finally the flight to Athens (followed by an hours tube ride to the city centre where wor hotel waz situated!) where we arrived some 12 hours afta leavin' Tyneside!

The temperature waz ower the 100 mark az we dumped wor bags in The Hotel Arethusa and we heeded straight for the forst 'liquid refreshment stop' ower the road.
A few more 'liquid stops' later and we eventually retired for the evenin! "ZZZZzzzz!!!!"

Next day it waz even hotter and az the match didn't kick off til '8:00 bells' we had aall day to sample the 'delights' of Athens, makin' sure to keep oot of the suns rays az we didn't want to get bornt to death!

It waz then oward to the groond which waz situated in the western suborbs of the capital.


The groond waz just wot we expected (a dump!) and on three sides of the groond the people of the high rise villas had an uninterupted view of the proccedings from their roof terraces and balconies (estimated 200 freebeez!)

Dan Gosling touched the baall forst az we kick off towards the end The Toon fans were hoosed behind a runnin' track and this meant that aa had nuw seen The Toon play in 100 consecutive European club competition games in a row strechin' way back to 1977! (Er!--this includes 6 games in the Anglo-Italian Cup az well!) 

However!---things didn't start off well and the home side were oot of their blocks quicker than we were and took the lead when Epstein hit a low shot past Steve Harper in The Toon goal.

The equaliser came deep into injury time when Gosling was fouled and from 25 yards oot Ryan Taylor (who else!?) hit one of his famous free kick 'screamers' 'ower the waall' into the back of the net, givin' the Atromitos keeper 'ne chance' and send the 90 Toon faithful into joyous celebrations! 

Marveaux the magician, Kuqi and Obertan then had chances to score in the second period, but couldn't find the back of the net and we had to settle for a ones each draw to take to the second leg next Thorsday @ St James'
A 'NOT QUITE' MINT CONDITION PROGRAMME!


Toon team: Harper, Taverier, Perch, Williamson, Ryan Taylor, Bigirimana, Anita, Marveaux, (Gutierrez 70), Obertan, Gosling (Amalfitano 64), Cisse (Campbell 77) 

Next day it waz then a 'torturous' jorney back to London (Heathrow Airport this time!)
via Romania for wor game against Chelski @ Stamford Bridge on the Saturday afta just fower hours kip (aye!--we'd stopped 'on the drink' for a canny while after the match!)
And we (eventually!) arrived  at wor hotel in Swiss Cottage (London) aroond aboot 17 hours after leavin' wor hotel in Athens @ '11:30pm bells'!****"Who would be a Toon fan!"?

Tuesday, 21 August 2012

DOUBLE HEEDER!***ATROMITOS v THE TOON (then!) CHELSKI v THE TOON

Updated '7:00am bells' Wednesday 22nd August 2012
"IT'S AALL GREEK TO ME!?"

Later this mornin 'The Geordie Times' sets off on an epic 'double heeder' of a jorney to London to catch wor flight from Gatwick, and then onward to Athens for the Atromitos game on Thorsday neet and then back to London again for wor game against  Chelski on Saturday @ '5:30 bells'.

We fully expect that wor 'shadow squad' will play in Greece and that wor 'full strength team' will play in west London because of the narrow gap between the two kick off times! (less than 48 hours!) 

The temp in Athens iz predicted to be 102% centigrade! (39 celcius!)---We'll just have to make sure that we have plenty of 'liquid lubrication' to keep us gannin!

We've been telt by the NUFC ticket office that 43 'NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' have bought away tickets for this match in total! (or shud that be!----43 'mad-sad fools'!)

No updates will be available til at least Sunday when we eventually get back! (we carnt afford posh phones/laptops etc. to send stuff back!---like!) (we've anly got 'carrier pigeons'!)

In the meeeentime!!!--wor computaa iz gannin into hibernation!!!----"ZZZZZZZzzzzzzz!!!!!!!"

TICKET NEWS!


Posted '10:55am bells' Tuesday 21st August 2012

There are still a few Atromitos (£25) and Chelski (£55!) tickets available for Thorsdays and Saturdays games and tickets for wor forthcomin' away game against 'The Toffee Noses' on Mon Sept 19th are nuw on sale priced @ £38 for big kids, £24 for zimmerframeites and £19 for sprogs!

Tickets for wor home game against 'The Greeks' a week on Thorsday are aalso on sale @ £15 and just a FIVER! for those of yoo with zimmerframes or dummies! 

More to follow on wor 'double heeder' of games against 'The Greeks' and Chelski later on tooneet!

Monday, 20 August 2012

THE TOON 2 SPORS 1

Posted '9:45am bells' Sunday 19th August 2012
 Ben Arfa penalty winner through the heat haze!

A wonder strike from Demba Ba and a Ben Arfa penalty @ The Gallowgate End in the 2nd half sealed the 3 points for The Toon in this evenly contested game in very humid conditions against the 'Hot'spurs (sic!).

It wasn't plain sailin though az Spors had hit the woodwork twice in the forst period and we were lucky to gan in 'nowts each' @ half time! (aalthough Ba went close @ The Leazes End!)

Ba's wonder strike came 10 minutes after the restart, when he struck a right footer into the corner of the net from just inside the penalty area, which sent the near capacity crowd wild! 
Vurnon Anita then made hiz debut to rapturous applause from 50,000 Geordies!

The visitors equalised through Defoe in the 77th minute and at this point it looked az though Spors wud gan on and win it az they had most of the play.

But Ben Arfa waz then 'sandwiched' between two Spors defenders in the box just 3 minutes later and the ref pointed straight to the spot.
Ben Arfa grabbed the baall off Demba Ba (who wanted to take the spot kick!) and he hit his effort to the right of Freidel in the visitors goal, (sendin him the wrang way!) to seal the tight fought victory in the 80th minute of the game.

'I Beg Your Pardew' waz sent to the stands after pushin' the linesman in the technical area not lang before this, after the 'blind official' failed to give us a throw in (we cud see from level 7 in The Milburn Stand that the baall waz oot!---why couldn't he???) 

A great start to the season!---lang may it continue!

Toon team: Krul, Simpson, Perch, Steven Taylor, Santon, Tiote, Cabaye (Inita 71), Gutierrez, Ben Arfa, Ba (Obertan 85), Cisse

Attendance: 52,385 (2,800 Spors fans)

Footnote: The resorves won 6-4 against Spors resorves @ Benton with wor goal comin' from Campbell who got a hat-trick,  Good, Vuckic and Inman.
The U18s aalso played against Spors U18s @ Little Benton next door, losin' 4-0 though! 

Saturday, 18 August 2012

THE TOON v SPORS***TODAY!*** PLUS! 'NEW' '100 CHALLENGE'!

Posted '9:40am bells' Saturday 18th August 2012

The new season iz aalmost upon us and kicks off in just under 8 hours time and 'The Geordie Times' haz an excitin' 'new 100 challenge' for the home games! 

Last season wor 'challenge' waz to visit 100 pubs and clubs throughoot the season, visitin' an average of five, before and after each game and we actually visited 102 in total in which we drank at least one pint in each!
(see '100 pub crawl challenge' on the toolbar @ the top of this page)

This challenge iz completeleee different and completeleee the opposite of last season!----
'The Geordie Times' aim iz to drink 100 different beers in ONE pub!

The drinkin' den in question will be!----THE NEWCASTLE ARMS! in St Andrews Street, just roond the corner from Chinatoon and within sight of St James' Park!

We realise that this challenge iz a lot easier than visitin' 100 different boozers, but we are gettin' on a bit and we cannit be bothered to trapes aroond the Toon, 'sniffin oot' new waaterin holes! 

We can anly hope that Neil the landlord haz plenty of real ales on offer throughoot the season!

Anyone who fancy's joinin' us in this challenge iz most welcome to do so!
'The Geordie Times 100 different beers challenge' iz ON!


In the meeentime!---there's aalso a futbaall match to gan te @ 'The Catherdral on the Hill' against Spors @ '5:30 bells' in wor forst Premya Leegue game of the season. (live on ESPN)
The visitors (not suprizingly!) have sold oot their allocation of 2,800 tickets for 'Level 7' of 'The Leazes End' and a 50,000 plus crowd iz guarenteed-------ne team news yet!

A new 'waaterin hole' will aalso be 'christened' in Chinatoon when the old 'Stage Door' nightclub reopens az 'The No. 9 Bar' on Stowell Street. (within eeezy 'hocklin distance' of the groond!)
Former Toon 'number 9s' 'Supermac' and Joe Allon<("er!"--he played in the number 9 shirt a couple of times!)  will be there and they are dein' a 'taalk-in' before the match @ '3 bells'---free admission!---aall welcome!

Friday, 17 August 2012

ATROMITOS AWAY TICKETS NUW ON SALE!

Posted '1:45pm bells' Friday 17th August 2012

'The Geordie Times' haz just hord through the grapevine that tickets for wor game in Greece against Atromitos next Thorsday are nuw on sale to season ticket holders from the NUFC box office above 'Shearers Bar' on a forst come forst sorve basis!

Application forms MUST be filled in with travel and passport details and tickets will cost £25.
They are expected to arrive here from Greece by sometime tomorrow and shud be ready to pick up on Sunday from the ticket office.

Thursday, 16 August 2012

VURNON'S YEARNIN'!

Posted 11:00pm bells Thorsday 16th August 2012

'The Geordie Times' haz just received the news from wor faithful carrier pigeon (a day late az usual!) that Vurnon Anita haz signed a 5 year deal for us from Ajax of Amsterdam for a reported fee of £6.7million quid!

The Dutch midfielder will take the vacant number 8 shirt and we are telt that 'Vurnon' iz 'yearnin' to pull on the world famous black 'n' white stripes!

We're not sure if he will feature in Saturday's Premya Leegue opener against Spors @ St James' Park, but he iz a very welcome addition to wor squad!

Remember!---'The Geordie Times' brings yoo the latest 'excluuusive' Toon news, second hand, forst! (or iz it, 'forst hand, second'!???) 

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