Saturday, 17 January 2015

THE TOON v SOOOTHAMPTON *** TEATIME/TIPPLE TIME!

Updated 'high noon bells' Saturday 17th January 2015

"WHO NEEDS 'SUN KISSED' DUBAI?"

This evenin' @ '5:30 bells' we face a rampant Sooothampton side who are fresh off their win @ 'The Theatre of Muppets' last week, while we contemplate a 2-0 defeat @ Chelski!

Wor worst performance in 2014 came @ St Mary's where 'The Simon Templar Mob' hammered us 4-0 last September and it could easily have been double that figure az we played so badly that day!

Wor visitors are in 3rd place in the table, while we are 12 points behind in 10th place---but more ominously, we are now just 10 points off the very bottom place, currently held by Lestaa, who (lest we forget?) knocked us oot of the FA Cup!
The team iz expected to be more or less the same az at Chelski last week and we can anly hope that we play like we did in the forst half there! <(but not the 'second'!)

"Whey aye the pie" Carver haz been speakin' aboot the 'sunshine break' the players and coachin' staff are havin' next week in Dubai az a 'reward' FA Cup elimination! (see article below!)

Carver: "People will be putting two and two together and thinking that we are on a 'jolly', but let me tell you it's no 'jolly-up'!"

He then gans on to say: "We go to Dubai on Sunday evening!"---"Monday we will have a 'recovery session'!" <(to get ower the 'jet lag' perhaps?)

"Tuesday will be a full training session!" <(wow!)

"Wednesday they'll be off!"----"They'll have a free day to play golf like a normal week!" (very nice!) <(at the same time aa'll probably be stuck in a traffic jam somewhere on the 'M1'!)

"We've got a hurricane out there to deal with <(Benton trainin' groond) and it's difficult to do quality stuff with the wind howling!" <(yi shud iv been on the 'A1M' in Coonty Durham at 'two bells' this mornin', mate!---if yi want to see wind howlin'!)

There iz ne mention az to wot they will be dein' for the rest of the week, but after last years 'sunshine break' in Dubai (after gettin' knocked oot of the FA Cup by 'then' basement side Cardiff!) we went on a fower game winless run withoot scorin' a solitary goal! <(these 'sunshine breaks' certainly work wonders---divvint they???

'Geordie Times' comment: Why? are we gannin on 'warm weathaa trainin', when wor next game after Sooothampton will be played @ Hull in freezin' cold temperatures!?
Surely it would be much better to jump on 'The Metro' and heed for Tynemooth beach where we used to gan for winter trainin' not too lang ago! >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Whitley Bay, just up the road haz a very nice miniature golf course az well, shud the players need some 'puttin' practice' <(just how playin' golf will help us anyway, iz bafflin' to say the least!???)

'Fink' (the mad-sad groundhopper!)

History lesson: We forst played Sooothampton @ St James' Park just ower 80 years ago on 1st December 1934, when we won 1-0 in a (old) Division 2 game, with Lang getting' the anly goal of the game. (crowd not known?)

'Geordie Times' history: Wor forst visit waz nearly 48 years ago in April 1967, when we beat 'The Simon Templar Mob' 3-1, with wor goals comin' from Wyn 'The Leap' Davies, Peter Noble and 'Pop' Robson.
42,426 were in attendance, in a game that saved us from relegation <(If aa remember correctly?) (we finished 3rd bottom of the (old) 1st Division that season, in the days when anly 2 went doon!)

In total we have played them 89 times, won 35, drawn 20 and lost 34 times

A full Geordie Times match/tipple report will appear here sometime tomorrow


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