THE TOON 2. THE BLUE MIONIES OF MANCLAND 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2025-2026

 Posted ‘2.47pm bells 🔔’ Sunday 23rd Novembaa 202

“A BARNESTORMING GAME!”

NUFC had won just ONE of wor previous 35 Premyaa Leegue meetings with The Blue Moonies and so we wornt very confident of a win!

How wrang we were az we went on the front foot from the forst minute when Harvey Barnes shot woz somehow saved by City goalie Donnarumma at The Leazes End!

More chances went abeggin with Waltemade firing in a strong heeder, which woz (unfortunately) brilliantly blocked by in The City goal!

He aalso had a strong shot saved by their goalie az well!

Barnes went close again but fired wide from a Murphy cross, when it looked easier to score!

It woz ‘to and fro’ az the Mancs missed chances az well at the other end through Haarland and Foden!

There were 2 controversial penalty appeals for City az well, which were both turned doon by VAR!

Somehow it woz nil-nil at half time, but the 2nd half did produce 3 goals!

THE GOALS!

63rd minute: Finally there woz a breakthrough when Harvey Barnes woz in the reet place from a Bruno pass on the edge of the box and hit a sweet reet footed shot past the Manc custodian ⬅️(we naa aall the big words!) to put us one-nil up, az the stadium erupted into a wall of noise!

However, wor joy woz short lived!

66th minute: Man City’s Diaz hits a shot from the centre of the box through a crowd of players for the equaliser! 1-1

70th minute: The 3,100 Blue Moonies high up in the Gods of The Leazes End joy woz aalso short lived when Bruno hit the bar with a heeder! The baall fell nicely for Harvey Barnes, to side foot the baall ower the goal line to put us back in the lead, az the crowd roared in approval!

HOWEVER! There woz a lengthy VAR caall for offside az we chewed wor finger nails—and after 5 minutes of uncertainty the ref pointed to centre circle ⭕️ to confirm the goal!— Az the crowd roared yet again for the correct decision! 2-1 to us!

City tried in vain to find a 2nd equaliser az 8 minutes stoppage time woz added for the VAR delay and numerous substitutions from both sides!

Az we whistled frantically for the final whistle, it eventually came in the NINTH minute of the extra time, to the relief of everyone present, apart from those dressed in light blue on and off the pitch! FT 2-1 to us!

The Blue Moonies manager ‘Pep’ woz non to pleased with the final result az he confronted Bruno by sayin something in hiz lug, which wor captain didn’t like!

Joelinton got involved but woz dragged away by other team mates!

A sore loser and the forst ever time that ‘Steady Eddie’ had come oot on top against him!

A very rare victory ower them, but woz one that woz richly desorved!

Attendance: 52,181 (3,100 Blue Moonies az mentioned)

*

THE TOON V THE BLUE MOONIES OF MANCLAND *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2025-2026

 Posted ‘high noon bells’ 🔔 Friday 21st Novembaa 2025

ST. JAMES’.PARK FROM ST. JAMES’ STREET!

NUFC gan into this game tomorrow evening, lookin for wor 6th home win in a row, havin conceded just one goal in the process, which iz in complete contrast to wor shocking away form, where we have yet to win an away Premyaa Leegue game this season!

Dan Burn iz suspended followin hiz sendin of at Brentfaad, but Tino Livramento iz expected to join the squad!

Anthony Gordon’s hip problem meenz he iz a doubt, but The Pope iz expected to start in goal, followin hiz concussion injury at Brentfaad!

There iz STILL nee news just when striker Wissa will be fit to make hiz debut followin hiz £55 million transfer on deadline day! (He haz now missed a total of 17 games since he signed for us!)

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday! Az per usual——-“Watch this space!”

A BALLOT FOR TH BRAIN DEAD

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells 🔔’ Tuezday 17th Novembaa 2025

The cash makers at NUFC have come up with the craziest scheme yet to fleece Mag Members oot of even more of their hard earned money!

Why would anybody gan into a ballot and pay £15 for the privilege to watch a game that you could watch in any other boozer for free, or in your own hoose!

This Mags Members milarky haz hit a new low and if any Toon fan Finks this iz good value for money, then we reeely dee have a brain dead fanbase!

A ‘WOR’ ZONE OR A WAR ZONE?

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells 🔔’ Saturday 15th Novembaa 2025

“STAB POOOF VESTS AT THE READY!”

NUFC have issued warnings to Toon fans who are travelling to Marseille a week next Tuezday, NOT to gan to certain places, NOT to wear club colours in case we are attacked or stabbed —and warnin that any fans planning to gan to the NUFC U19s game, which kicks off at ‘2.30 bells 🔔’ in Martiguas 22 miles (45km) from The Orange Velodrome in Marseille, that this is impossible to do! (NOT good news for ‘The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’ who planned to dee both games!)

NUFC have said this on their website: ⬇️

Supporters are unable to attend the youth league fixture due to the requirements that fans MUST be at the meeting point no later than 16.30!——with a warning that any fans who torn up after the 4.30pm 🔔 bells’ deadline, will NOT be allowed onto the Metro to attend the game! (That’s 4 and a half hours before the game kicks off at 9.00 bells 🔔’)

We will then be herded like sheep 🐑 onto a Metro train 🚇 straight to the groond some 15 minutes later!

Absolutely ridiculous to be forced to gan to this groond that lang before the start!⬇️

Below iz a list of items that will not be allowed into the stadium, includin, guns, long bladed swords/machetes, claw hammers, crash helmets (for protection against flyin missiles!)—- plus, on top of that, you cannit take your Alsatian dogs with you! (Az if we would!) ⬇️

On arrival we will then be caged into a corner section of the groond (like in 2004), with netting on aall sides (including the view of the pitch!) to stop any missiles coming wor way from the very ‘friendly’? Ultraz!

Then after the game we are told that we will be hearded back onto the Metro trains in groups of 500 after bein’ locked in for at least an hour!— by the time the last of the 3,000 Toon Travellers eventually get onto the Metro, it will be 2 HOURS after the first batch, by the time we get back to the meeting point! (According to the NUFC website!)

It makes you wonder if aall this unnecessary ridiculous hassle iz worth it!?— It’s supposed to be a futbaall match!—-not a fcukin war zone! 🥶🔫🔨🪓🧨🔪⚔️

PS: We hear that ‘NUFC mad-sad groundhopper’ ‘Glennn from Ashington’ IZ planning to dee both games—he will get to the meeting point (22 miles(45km)from the youth game in a taxi!💶€€€) well after the deadline and ‘gamble’ that the local ‘dibble’ 👮‍♂️ will let him through!

A massive gamble 🎲 that the rest of us arnt willing to to take!

Best of luck Glennn! 🙏🏻 

The last time we were here 21 years ago the very nice Marseille Ultras set a stand on fire 🔥 to keep the Toon fans warm in the fenced in area beside them, on a chilly neet in southern France!—Very nice of them to be so kind and friendly! ⬇️

SPOT THE SECURITY CAGE!

SJP *** EURO 5!

 Posted ‘high 🕛 noon 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 13th Novembaa 2025

News that St. James’ Park will host FIVE games in Euro 2028 reaches The Geordie Times!

This includes 4 group games and a last 16 game!

The game dates are az follows:

Group games:⬇️

Munday 12th Joon 2028 

Thorzday 15th Joon 2028

Saturday 17th Joon 2028

Tuezday 20th Joon 2028

Roond of 16 game:⬇️

Sunday 25th Joon 2028

And shud Ing-er-land reach the last 16 az group winners, then THAT game will be at SJP az well!

A huge 20,000 fan zone iz to be built az well— We assume on the land next to The Stack near to St James Metro station and behind The Gallowgate End!?

FANtastic news for aall of Tyneside!

HARROGATE TYKES 3. THE TOON U21s 1 **** EFL TROPHY

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells 🔔’ Wedinzday 12th Novembaa 2025

The curse of the green strip strikes yet again!

“THE NAME GAME!”

Playin’ in wor horrible ‘jinxed’ green strip we went oot of the EFL Trophy with a whimper at Harrogate Town last neet!

Ellis Taylor put the home side in front when he beat hiz namesake James Taylor in the Toon goal in the 12th minute! (You could say the goal woz ‘Taylor made’! 🫣(sic!)

The Toon’s Harrison Ashby then set up HIZ namesake Alfie Harrison, who hit a sweet shot, deep into forst half stoppage time! HT 1-1

The Yorkshire Tykes then regained the lead in the 64th minute when Tom Curson hit a shot that went in off the post!  2-1 to them!

Then with aboot 10 minutes remaining, Curson put the green cursed U21s oot of the competition, with a tap in, from a blocked shot, that beat wor goalie, who woz oot of position! FT 3-1 to them!

Attendance: 1,469 (146 NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers!) (Excludin’me’ who haz been there before!)

*Wor 1st team have worn the green change strip 4 times this season, resultin in 2 goal-less draws and 2 horrendous defeats!—This strip iz truly ‘cursed’!

THE BRENTFAAD BEEZ KNEEZ 3. THE TOON 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2025-2026

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells’ 🔔 Munday 10th Novembaa 2025

A MINUTES SILENCE ON REMEMBRANCE SUNDAY

“BURN OOT!” 🔥(IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE!)

Anothaa week and another miserable result in London—This time on the west side and not the east side where we capitulated 3-1 again! (3-1 at West Ham last Sunday!)

For a change we wore dark blue shirts with orange shorts and socks, but it made nee difference to the 'jinxed' green and white we normally wear away!

The warnin bells 🔔 came early on when a scramble in wor box nearly led to a Brentfaad opener az they attacked the end that we were housed in!

Then just before the half hour mark The Toon took the lead when Harvey Barnes fired home from inside the box from a Woltemade assist, to put us 1-0 up to joyous cheers from wor section!

PLANES ON THEIR WAY TO HEATHROW AIRPORT FLEW OWER THE GROOND AT THE RATE OF ONE A MINUTE!---BRENTFAAD'S GROOND IZ A PLANESPOTTERS PARADISE!

We managed to hold oot up until the break, but the 2nd half woz totally calamitous!

11 minutes after the restart The Pope made a hash of tryin to punch the baall away —and it fell nicely for Schade who had the simple task of heedin the baall ower the line unmarked! 1-1

And then the 2 Dan Burn penalty incidents!  

The forst one woz when Big Dan woz deemed to have tripped Ouattara in the box az he theatrically went doon!  The ref woz havin non of it and booked Ouattara for simulation!

However!— another penalty appeal in the 73rd minute against Big Dan woz upheld, when he brought doon Ouattara and this time the ref produced a red card for the big man for a 2nd bookable offence, to reduce us to 10 men and of course a penalty kick against us!

The Pope had sustained an arm injury, when he fell awkwardly a few minutes beforehand and woz replaced by Aaron Ramsdale between’the sticks’, but he couldn’t prevent Thiago from scorin, az he sent wor sub keeper the wrang way to put them 2-1 up!

There woz a glimmer of hope when the 4th official put up ELEVEN minutes of stoppage time (Due to Pope’s injury when he fell and several substitutions from both sides!)

Elanga, who had came on in the 77th minute, missed a great chance to equalise, but it The Beez Knees of Brentfaad who put the game to bed after more defensive errors, when in the 6th minute of time added, Thiago beat Botman to a loose baall, to fire home an easy chance, which saw the away end empty, very rapidly!

A complete ‘Burn oot’ 🔥for sure in more ways than one! 

The result leaves NUFC in 14th place in the Premyaa Leegue table and just 2 above the relegation zone, az we enter yet another International break!----Next up>>>The Blue Moonies of Man City at SJP in 13 days time!

We have scored just 3 goals in wor 6 away Leegue games and have drawn 3 and lost 3 for just 3 points oot of a possible 18

NUFC have aalso used 3 different away strips this season and have never played in wor black n white stripes away from home in the Leegue!

(We did played in black n stripes at USG in The Champions Leegue, when we won 4-0!)

Attendance: 17,207 (1,800 very weary travellers!)

The jorney doon had been a nightmare the day before, with replacement buses from York to Wakefield because of line work on LNER—But the jorney back yem torned oot to be even worse!  (Deep breath!) A bus from Brentfaad to Hammersmith underground station—a tube to King’s Cross—-a train to Wakefield Westgate—a bus from Wakefield to York, where, to compoond my misery, a veteran, who had been to the Cenotaph in London for Remembrance Sunday, sat beside me on the packed bus and spotted mee Toon badges—and said the immortal words—“I’m not going to tell you who I support!”—(Oh yes you are, I thought!) and then gleefully told me he woz a fcukin mackem fan! (yi couldn’t possibly make it up!)—then after an hours bus ride, a train from York to The Central (Toon train station) —-and finally! the last bus yem after continuous travellin from when the match ended at ‘4.05 🛎️s’ to nearly midneet 🔔s’

Aall that horrendous travellin for a horrendous result (yet again!) Bus-tube-train-bus-train-bus! (Both on the way doon and back!)

PUB CRAWL PIX*** 9 VISITED⬇️

IT SHOULD BE NOTED THAT THE SMB GAME WOZ ON THE TELLY, SO WE REFUSED TO WATCH IT AND WALKED OOT!---WE CAME BACK THE NEXT DAY (MATCH DAY)

THE STEAM PACKET, BRENTFORD, LONDON

THE BELL AND CROWN, BRENTFORD, LONDON🠟🠝

THE CITY BARGE, BRENTFORD, LONDON🠅🠇

£99 FOR AN XMAS DINNER IN A LONDON PUB?

BULLS HEAD, BRENTFORD, LONDON

THE PILOT, BRENTFORD, LONDON🠅🠇

A BARGAIN!🠅

THE BETJEMANS ARMS, ST PANCRAS, LONDON (Many visits previously)

YORK TAP, YORK (On the way back yem---Many visits previously)

THE BRENTFAAD BEEZ KNEEZ V THE TOON *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2025-2026

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells’ 🔔 Saturday 8th Novembaa 2025

VIEW FROM THE AWAY CORNER LAST SEASON. LOST 4-2!

“LONDON CALLING!”(Again!)

For the 3rd time in little under 3 weeks we are off to ‘the smoke’ (London) to watch The Toon!

We are travellin today coz the forst train from The Toon on Sunday mornin isn’t til ‘8.00am 🔔s’ and there’s a dreaded replacement bus from York to Wakefield, makin it virtually impossible to get to Brentfaad for the ‘2.00 🛎️s’ kick off!

The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’ went to Sutton in south London 12 days ago, for a Toon U21s game at a new groond v Palace U 21s, then West Ham in east London last Sunday and Brentfaad in west London tomorrow afternooon!(Sky)

We just need north London to complete the compass set! (The Arse and Sporz!)

Anthony Gordon haz a hip problem and will probably miss oot, az will Will Osula with an ankle problem!

We know we will have to play in one of wor change strips, but please, let it be wor maroon and blue strip and NOT wor ‘jinxed’ green strip, az we have played 2 goal-less draws and had 2 defeats, wearin that colour so far this season! 🙏🏻 

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here, sometime on Munday!

APU “Watch this space!” ⬇️

THE TOON 2. THE BILBAO BASQUE BRIGADE 0 *** CHAMPIONS LEEGUE GROUP STAGE GAME 4*

 Posted just after ‘high noon 🕛 bells 🔔 onwards, Thorzday 6th Novembaa 2025

THE BILBAO BASQUE BRIGADE MARCH UP LEAZES PARK ROAD TOWARDS SJP WITH A ‘DIBBLE’ ESCORT!

“JUST CHAMPION!”

2 goals in each half , both heeders, secured the 3 points to send NUFC up to the dizzy 😵‍💫 heights of 6th place in the Champions Leegue table, above Real Madrid, Barcelona and Livaapoool!

There woz a great pre match atmosphere, with Toon and Bilbao fans mixing freely in a bond that I have seen before, stretching back to 1994 when we both met in the UEFA Cup!

They had 2,500 fans in level 7 of The Leazes End and were in boisterous mood az the game kicked off!

It woz clear from the start that we were the better team az we attacked the Leazes goal and after a couple of good chances we made the breakthrough in the 11th minute when Dan Burn latched onto a Kieran Trippier free kick which he heeded goalwards. On its way the baall took a ‘banana 🍌 bend’ az it hit the net just inside the far post to put us 1-0 up!

The goal woz reminiscent ⬅️(we naa aall the big words!) of hiz heeder at Wembley in the Leegue Cup final!

We should have added more goals before the interval, but couldn’t add to wor lead in this half! 

HT 1-0 to us!

It didn’t take lang to double wor lead in the 2nd period, when a Harvey Barnes shot woz blocked by a Bilbao defender and bounced straight back to him!

This time he opted to cross the baall and an unmarked Joelinton woz on the end of it, to heed past the Basque’s goalie to double wor advantage! 2-0 to us!

The were more chances to forthaa increase wor lead through Waltemade and Elanga in particular, but the killer 3rd goal wouldn’t come!

Multiple substitutions from both sides followed, with The Pope in the Toon goal makin a couple of excellent saves az Bilbao had their best attacking spell of the match near the end of the game!

It wasn’t to be for the Basque Brigade and we held on to keep a clean sheet and claim a 3rd successive win in The Champions Leegue! FT 2-0 to us!

CL LATEST STANDINGS ⬇️

Attendance: 51,923 (2,500 Basques!) ⬇️

*

And wor friendship with Athletic Bilbao fans gans back 31 years, when we played them in the UEFA Cup!

The pictures below are from wor visit to Bilbao in Novembaa 1994 ⬇️

THE TOON V THE BILBAO BASQUE BRIGADE*** CHAMPIONS LEEGUE GROUP STAGE GAME 4

 Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Bonfire Neet 5th Novembaa 2025

We switch competitions once more in this hectic period when we take on old friends Athletic Bilbao in The Champions Leegue at ‘8.00 🔔 bells tooneet at SJP!

If we play lke we played against Sporz last Wedinzday we will win! BUT! if we play lke we did against West Ham on Sunday we will surely lose!

Typical Toon— yi never naa wot yih gannih get!?

It’s crazy that we are higher up in The Champions Leegue table in 11th place, than wot we are in The Premyaa Leegue, where we are 13th and nearer a relegation place, than a Champions Leegue qualification place!

Should The Toon win, then we will be back in the top 8 qualification places again! (Last neets results knocked us from 8th to 11th place!)

SO!—-Let’s hope we play well and finally ‘kick start’ wor season!

We understand that Bruno could miss the game through illness, while Bilbao have at least 3 key players oot through injury!

NUFC need to take advantage of this to give us aall a lift after Sunday’s debacle! ⬅️(We naa aall the big words!🤪👍)

Bilbao will have a followin’ of 2,500 fans, who will march to SJP from The Bigg Market at ‘5.30pm 🔔 bells’! (It should be quite a sight!)

A Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Thorzday 

Az per usual! “WATCH THIS SPACE!” ⬇️