320 horsfield stadium bradford (sorry! that shud read horsFALL stadium!)

Ground number 320
Date of First Visit: 10th July 2016
Horsfield (correction!) Horsfall Stadium, Bradford

Bradford Park Avenue  0
Newcastle United U21s  3 (Toney, Longstaff, Harvey)

Friendly Fixture
Attendance 675 (plus 3 of us who forgot to pay!---honest!)

"YOO LORN SOMETHIN' NEW EVERY DAY!"

This game waz arranged to remember the life of 2nd Lieutenant Donald Simpson Bell who waz killed in 'The Battle of the Somme' exactly 100 years ago to the day!
Bell played for both The Toon and Bradfaad and won the Victoria Cross for hiz bravery on the battlefield just 5 days before hiz death.
To be honest a'd never even hord of him until Saturday when aa read hiz story.
Before the kick off we were telt ower the loudspeaker that he iz the ANLY professional futbaaller to this day who haz won the Victoria Cross and 36 members of hiz family were there az invited guests by the club to watch the game!

We had arrived some 3 hours before hand and heeded straight for the clubhoose situated inside the groond (aall 7 of us!)
An excited Bradfaad official informed us that SIX NUFC forst teamers would be playin'!---but when we informed him that in fact the entire forst team squad were 'at this minute' in a trainin' camp near Dublin, hiz face dropped! (there WERE 6 players who at sometime had featured briefly in forst team games like Bigiramana, Gilliead and Vuckic, but yoo could hardly say that the were 'seasoned first teamers'!)   

Kick off waz preceded by the playin' of 'The Last Post' by a bugler followed by a minute silence in 2nd Lieutenant Bells honour

Straight away 'National League side' Bradfaad went for 'the jugular' and had 2 great efforts which went narrowly wide.
The programme we bought and team sheet were absolutleee useless az the WRANG players were listed az playin', which anly added to the confussion when The Toon took the lead in the 13th minute at 'The Marquee Tent End'!  (see photos!)

GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE!---IVAN TONEY GOAL
@ 'THE MARQUEE TENT END'!

Ivan Toney scored with a low shot, but the team sheet said he waz someone else!

The lead waz doubled 9 minutes into the 2nd half when Sean Longstaff hit a sweet shot past the Brafaad keeper at the 'Big Grass Bank End' (again, see photo!) az glorious sunshine torned into torrential rain az we scurried for cover in a stand ne bigger that a bus shelter!

GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE!
THE LINESMAN SIGNALS FOR A CORNER TO 'US'
@ 'THE BIG GRASS BANK END'!

7 minutes from time it waz 'game ower' when 'Mystery Man' fired home from inside the box! (we later foond oot that he waz a trialist caalled Tyler Harvey!) 

The 2 fans who DIDN'T get their priorities right!
Notable absentees from the 'NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' were 'Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer' who preferred instead to be wined and dined in hiz mates chateau in northern France, rather than be here to watch the resorves ---and 'Dave from York' who waz on a luxury Caribbean cruise with hiz 'better half'!---it beggars belief!---

Take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself a serious question---where would YOO rather be---like????--- Sittin' in a chateau drinkin' and eatin' fine wine and food???---lyin' next to a swimmin' pool in the bakin' sun on the deck of a luxury cruiser, bein' waited on hand and foot???---OR!--- drinkin' a pint of luke waam Tetley's bitter, whilst eatin' a stale beefborger 'n' onions in downtown Bradford, az the weathaa takes a torn for the worse????

"I REST MY CASE!!!"



"WE WAZ THERE PHOTOS!"


     

A BUGLER FROM BELL'S YORKSHIRE REGIMENT PLAYS 'THE LAST POST'

THE BANNER ON THE FAR SIDE READS
'BRADFORD PALS' 'SOMME 1916'

A MODEL OF BRADFAAD'S OLD LEEGUE GROOND IN PARK AVENUE
(HENCE THEIR NAME!)
(THEY WERE A LEEGUE SIDE UNTIL THE1970's)

 

DUNSTON BAD BLUE BOYS 6. CONSETT HILLBILLIES 1 **** NORTHERN PREMYAA LEEGUE EAST DIVISION

 Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Wedinzday 13th Novembaa 2024

“DOUBLE HAT-TRICK DELIGHT!”

With yet anothaa International break in full swing soon (the 3rd this season!) aa went to watch The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston play the Hillbillies of Consett last neet!

Dunston won 6-1 in a highly entertainin game watched by 268 hardy souls on a freezing cold neet, where yoo could see the players steamy breath az they exhailed!

A double hat-trick from JJ O’Donnell and Scott Robson (Son of former Toon reserve player Justin Robson, who woz there!) sealed an impressive victory and the goal of the game woz undoubtedly the 5th one from Robson, who sent a curlin shot ower the Consett keeper and into the far corner of the net at ‘The Tea Hut End’ of the groond!

The Hillbillies consolation goal came from Holdsworth on the hour mark when the score woz 3-0

A great game if you are a Dunston fan!—Not so if you follow Consett!

It’s rare to see one hat-trick in a game and even rarer to see TWO!

Az NUFC divvint play til a week come next Munday (West Ham at SJP) mee Saturday’fix’ this week will be at Bradfaad Park Avenue where Dunston are playin’! (Been there a while back to watch an NUFC X1 play them!)

A brief match report on the Bradfaad/Dunston game will appear here sometime ower the weekend!

THE FRIAR TUCK MOB OF NOTTINGHAM 1. THE TOON 3 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ 🌺Munday 11th Novembaa 2024

AN ‘HISTORIC’ MOMENT’! GORDON’S CORNER RESULTS IN A GOAL BY ISAK—WOR FORST GOAL FROM A CORNER THIS SEASON AFTER 55 PREVIOUS FAILURES!
 

For the 3rd time this year and for the 4th time in a row we have beaten Forest 🌳 at The City Groond—a lucky groond for us, unlike Stamford Bridge in wor previous away game where we cannit get a win for love nor money!

It started off badly however az The Friar Tuck Mob took the lead in the 21st  minute through a Murillo heeder from a Elanga free kick (which should never have been given by 💩 Taylor the ref!)

Bruno, Burn 🔥 and Gordon had great chances to equalise, but we just couldn’t find the net!

HT 1-0 to them!

The big breakthrough came in the 54th minute when Anthony Gordon took a corner and with 55 previous corner failures this season, we actually scored, when his cross foond ‘Alexander the Great’ (Isak) who hit the baall home off the far post! 1-1 (See top pic)(The corner curse iz cast!)

We took the lead in the 72nd minute when Joelinton went steaming’ into the box and hit a great ‘banana shot’ past wor former keeper Matt Selzs to send the near 3,000 faithful behind that goal into raptures! 2-1 to us!

TOON FANS CELEBRATE JOELINTON’S GOAL!

9 minutes later it woz 3-1 when super sub Harvey Barnes, who had anly been on the pitch for 3 minutes, ran doon the wing and cut in, to send a shot which squeezed inside the post with Sela (sorry! that shud be  SELZS) unable to stop it! ( special that to Russs for pointing oot mee missstaykz)

This sent the faithful into complete meltdoon and the 3 points were secured! FT 3-1 to us!

The result leaves us just ONE point behind Chelsee in 3rd place in the table, but we are actually doon in 8th place, az the gap iz so tight between 3rd and 13th place in the race for Europe and a possible Champions Leegue place!—-Just ‘CHAMPION!’ 🤪👍🏁

Attendance: 30,145 (2,950 delighted Geordies!)

“WE WILL REMEMBER THEM!” 

An explanation: We say ‘The Friar Tuck Mob’, az Friar Tuck woz in the Robin Hood outlaw gang, who were from Sherwood forest near Nottingham! (Get it?🤔)

PUB CRAWL PIX Just 4 this time   2 in Newark and 2 in Nottingham

THE RAM, NEWARK

VAT AND FIDDLE, NOTTINGHAM (3rd time here this year!)

INDUSTRY, NOTTINGHAM

JB, NEWARK

JB, NOTTINGHAM

“THERE’S NO BRAINS ON THE TRAINS!” 🚂 

To get to the game we went via Newark North Gate station and Newark Castle station and then from there to Nottingham station

The first part of the jorney woz uneventful from The Toon to Newark North Gate

But the second part from Newark Castle to Nottingham, woz anything but!

There were hundreds of Toon fans waitin for the train at Newark Castle

The 4 carriage train turned up BUT we were anly allowed into the front 2 and the last 2 were completely empty!

We were packed in like sardines and could hardly move in the mad crush to get on!

The train guard told us that they were 2 trains joined together and they needed a guard for both sections!  There woz anly ONE guard however (him!) and he told us he wasn’t allowed under health and safety rules to let us into the last 2 carriages!

Honestly! we had to stand, hardy even to move wor hands and legs for the 30 minute ‘ jorney to hell’!

We pleaded with him to open the doors for the last 2 carriages, but wor pleas fell on ‘deaf ears 👂 👂 (He woz standin on the platform at the time!)

Nee thoughts for ‘health and safety’ for the passengers jammed in, at aall!

“Yi couldn’t make this farcical situation up!—Could you?

PS: For the retorn jorney we actually got seats and the train wasn’t anywhere near az packed?—Where have aall the Toon fans who were on the forst train to Nottingham gone???—we thought az there woz nee sign of them at aall!???🤔

Memo: NEVER gan to Nottingham via Newark again!

THE FRIAR TUCK MOB V THE TOON *** SUNDAY AFTERNOOON!

 *Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Saturday 9th Novembaa 2024

“THE TOON ARMY ARE ON THEIR WAY TO NOTTINGHAM AGAIN ROBIN!”

For the thord time this year we heed to Nottingham when we take on The Friar Tuck Mob at The City Groond.

And for the thord time we are hopin that we come away with a win, against a Forest team that sits high up in the table in thord place!

NUFC are in 11th but a win would put us on level points with them amazingly, az there iz just a 4 point gap between us!—it’s that tight at the top! (Jimmy the Ridler haz just pointed oot that there are anly 3 points for a win!—Anothaa dillibrit misstayk from The Geordie Times!)

The previous time we drove doon, coz we could get back by train (midweek in the Leegue Cup!) but this time we will let the train 🚂 take the strain az the ‘2:00 bells 🔔’ meenz we can get there and back in one day!(Hopefully?)

NUFC sold wor 2,950 ticket allocation oot many moons ago! 

Trippier, Lascelles, Botman and (of course!) Wilson are aall still crocked, while Murphy iz doubtful?

But congratulations to Lewis Hall, who haz been caalled up into the Ing-er-land 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 squad for the next roond of Internationals, which take place soon!

A full Geordie Times match and boozer report will appear here sometime on Munday!

APU “Watch space!”

371 the lamb ground, tamworth (u21s)

 Ground number 271 

Correction! 371 (Special thanx to ‘Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer’ for spottin my dillibrit mistayk!👏)

Date of First Visit: 5th November 2024

The Lamb Ground, Tamworth

Tamworth 1

Newcastle United U21s 1 (Donaldson)

Newcastle won 6-5 on penalties

National League Cup group ‘C’

Attendance: 387 (aboot 20 NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers)

“THE LAMBS TO THE SLAUGHTER!” (Whey not exactly!) 🐑 

We travelled doon to Tamworth in a convoy of cars! (Whey not exactly!) 'Biffa the Beer' picked me up from wor hoose in his ‘jam jar’ with 'Glennn from Ashington' in the front passenger seat—We then drove to The White House in Chester-le-Street where ‘Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer’ woz waitin to pick us up in HIZ ‘jam jar’ (his turn to drive) and Biffa parked there ( ootside a hoose that’s painted white—very appropriate az the USA elections were on the same day!)

(Blondie lives in Langley Park (Where Sir Bobby Robson woz from) and it woz easier for him if we drove south and Chester iz a convenient place for a pick up!)

Anyway!—we arrived at The Lamb groond some 3 and a qwaataa hours later, parked up and heeded for the nearest boozer which woz a 10 minute walk from the groond caalled 'The Bole Bridge'!

After a few 'liquid lubrications it woz time to heed back to the groond---or more importantly 'THE TAMWORTH CLUBHOOSE!

More 'tonsil ticklin' woz done there and soon it woz time for the kick off!

Wor U21s torned oot in an aall white strip with green pipin, while Tamworth wore their red and black strip!

The groond looked a bit ramshackle apart from the smaall cantilever stand that we were in ---and would surely fail the groond gradin', shud they win promotion to the Futbaall Leegue, PLUS they wud need to rip up their artificial pitch and lay a grass one doon!

THE SMAALL CANTILEVER STAND, PRE MATCH (6 ROWS OF SEATS)

The crowd looked in the low hundreds and aa guessed that there were 400 there includin aboot 20 or so Toon diehards who had travelled from various places! (Includin the 4 of us from the north east!)

Az the game kicked off, anothaa 'Toonhopper' appeared caalled 'Secret Pigeon', who lives in Livaapool, but iz workin in the Birmingham area (He 'flew' to the game!)👇

We pounded the goal to wor right and had many chances to take the lead and aboot 9 or 10 corners az well, but couldn't make the breakthrough!  It woz a totally one sided forst half against wor National Leegue opponents, but somehow they held on til the break!

HT 0-0

The Telford Lambs (their nickname) made several changes for the 2nd period and were much better in this half and had a couple of good chances to take the lead!

However! it woz ‘us’ who took the lead in the 63rd minute when Josh Donaldson latched onto a Jay Turner-Cooke free kick and toe poked the baall into the net!

This resulted in a huge fireworks display from ootside the groond in celebration of the goal!

THE LOCALS CELEBRATE DONALDSON’S GOAL WITH A FIREWORKS 🎆 DISPLAY!

The display had obviously nothin’  to dee with it bein’ the annual 5th of Novembaa 'Guy Fawkes’ celebrations, but were from exiled Toon fans ootside! (Honest!)

If the score ended aall square there would be a penalty shootout at the end of the game for an extra point!—

And so!— (yiv guessed it!) they got an equaliser a few minutes before the end through Tshikuna ⬅️(Hope a’v sppelt that reet?) who hit a rocket shot past Aiden Harris  in the Toon goal, to send the game into a penalty shootout for the extra point!

Which went like this  az the Toon U21s took the first spot kick

1-0  Donaldson scored for U21s

1-0  Wallace missed goal by a mile for Tamworth!

1-0 Hunt’s shot saved by Tamworth goalie

1-1 Fletcher scores for Tamworth

2-1 Turner-Cooke scores for U21s

2-2 Creaney scores for Tamworth 

3-2 Donaldson scores for U21s

3-3 Tshikuna scores for Tamworth

4-3 Emerson scores for U21s

4-4 Digie scores for Tamworth

5-4 McAlister scores for U21s

5-5 Cockeril scores for Tamworth 

6-5 Sharar scores for U21s

6-5 Williams hits the bar for Tamworth!

NUFC U21s win 6-5 on penalties to claim the extra point!

Pleeeze note that they got the date wrang on the team sheet!

PS: Mee guess of a 400 crowd wozzint far off (387)

This 'crowd' woz 1,000 less than their average home gate and ower 3,000 less than they got for their 'giant killin' FA Cup defeat of Huddaazfeeld last week!---

Yet anothaa groond off the list az ‘yours truly’ edges ever closer to the 3 and 3 quarter century mark! 

“WE WOZ THERE!”- THE PROOF! 👇👇👇👇

Explanation for wor overseas reeeders!

Guy Fawkes tried to blow the Houses of Parliament up with gun powder in 1605 and woz hung, drawn and quartered for ‘high treason!’

GUY FAWKES

He woz arrested on the 5th of Novembaa 1605 and this date haz been celebrated ever since with 🔥 bonfires and fireworks 🧨 displays ever since!

NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPER NEWS***NEW GROOND! ***NEW GROOND!

 *Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Tuezday 🔥 5th of Novembaa 🔥 2024 🧨 

THE LAMB GROOND, TAMWORTH

‘The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers’ are on wor travels again—- this time to the Midlands, where wor U21s are takin on National Leegue Tamworth at their Lamb groond in The National Leegue Cup group stage tooneet!  A brand new grooond for the ‘Toonhoppers!’🤪👍🏁

The game kicks off at ‘7:45 🛎️s’ and it’s a tenner for big kids to get in and various lower prices for sprogs and zimmerframeites!

IF yih cannit make it the game will be live on National League TV for ‘The Toon Tellyhoppers’! 📺 

A Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime tomorrow!

Az per usual!-“Watch this space!”

THE TOON 1. THE ARSE 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘high noon 🔔bells’ Sunday 3rd Novembaa 2024

FOR ONCE I TOTALLY AGREE WITH THE ARSEHOLES MANAGER, THAT THE BAALL WOZ DEFINATLY OOT OF PLAY WHEN GORDON CROSSED IT FOR ISAK’S GOAL!

“WHAT NOT! A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES!”

“WE WILL REMEMBER THEM!”

Without doubt this woz wor best performance of the season az we matched wor visitors man for man!

For the 2nd time in 3 days we beat 1 of the so caalled ‘big 6 cartel’, havin knocked Chelseee oot of the Leegue Cup on Wedinzday at SJP!

A gutsy performance,where we fought for every baall and every one of the players who took part had a great game!

The anly goal of the game came in the 12th minute at The Gallowgate End when a pinpoint right footed cross from Anthony Gordon foond the heed of Alexander the Great (Isak) and he made nee misstayk az he sent a bullet heeder into the top corner of The Arse net, to send the crowd wild with delight!

Not lang after this Gordon sent a low cross across the box, but Joelinton couldn’t get on the end of it az he slid and stretched to try and make contact!

The Arse had chances az well, but couldn’t find the back of the net and we went in 1-0 up at the break!

Straight after the restart Gordon passed to Joe Willock but hiz shot woz saved by Rafa in the visitors goal at The Leazes End!—He then ‘skied’ a shot just after this az we tried to double the lead!

Isak aalso got in on the act in this period but his shot woz saved az well!

The Arse had a great chance to level things deep into stoppage time but he sent his heeder wide with the goal gapin’!

This woz a togetherness and spirited performance az the entire NUFC team were on the ‘same page’ once more!  

Two 1-0 wins ower Arteta’s side in 12 months!—BRILLIANT!-And nee whingin ‘baall oot’ controversy for wor goal, like last season from him!—-or woz there? (See very top photo!🤪👍🏁) 

Attendance: 52,249 (3,000 Arseholes)

THE TOON V THE ARSE *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘7:00pm 🛎️ bells’ Friday 1st Novembaa 2024

We retorn to SJP 3 days after beatin’ Chelseee in the Leegue Cup and face The Arse in the 💩’12:30 🔔s’ slot for live telly!

Honestly I hate these orly kick offs az it completely fcuks up the pre match boozin session, with many drinkin dens open in’ at ‘9am 🛎️s’ for thorsty punters!🍺🍺🍺🍺

Anyway! After last seasons “woz it over the line” goal when we won 1-0 ,wor visitors from “norf Landan” will be oot for revenge for certain!

If we can play like we did against Chelseee, then we’ve got a great chance to beat them again!

Not sure wot the startin X1 will be, but hopefully they will aall be fit      (apart from Wilson, Botman and Targett of course!) and are raring to gan!

This iz wor last home game before Remembrance Sunday and another poppy display like last years (see above) will be displayed from The East Stand!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Sunday!   “Watch this space!” (az per usual!)

THE TOON 2. THE CHELSEEE PENSIONERS 0 *** LEEGUE CUP 4th ROOND

 *Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 31st Octobaa 2024

“MUCH BETTER!”

NUFC put in wor best display since we drew with Man City to progress to the qwaataa finals of the competition!

Chelseee fielded a completely different line to the team that beat us 2-1 in the Premyaa Leegue just 3 days orlier—-and paid the price!

Joelinton rattled the post at The Leazes End orly on az we went on the attack—‘aall guns blazin’!

We finally took the lead in the 23rd minute when Sandro Tonali foond ‘Alexander the Great’ (Isak) who hit a sweet shot past Jorgesen in the visitors goal!

The lead woz doubled 3 minutes later when a free kick taken by Lewis Hall foond Isak who crossed the baall to Joe Willock, who heeded goalwards.  Anly for Chelseee’z Disali to slice the baall into his own net, with Kelly bearin’ doon on him!

HT 2-0 to us!

If aa remember correctly Joelinton hit the post again, this time at The Gallowgate End in the second period and we held on for a much needed victory!✌️az The Pensioners (their original nickname) tried in vain to break doon wor defence with The Pope in the Toon goal makin some excellent saves!

We have now just lost one home game since last January— not bad for a team that hazzint been playin’ well!

The draw for the next roond woz watched on by anxious fans after the game in the Leazes End boozer, in fear of gettin’ one of the ‘big boys’ away in the next roond!

But there were loud cheers when we drew The Brentfaad Beez at SJP—wor 3rd home tie in a row!—in other words ‘The 🐝 beez kneez’ az the Cockneys would say!

Attendance: 51,934 (4,883 very loud Pensioners at the start of the game—just half that number of very quiet Pensioners, who had stayed til the bitter end!)