Wednesday, 1 February 2023

THE TOON 2 THE SIMON TEMPLAR MOB OF SOOOTHAMPTON 1 *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI FINAL 2nd LEG (AGGREGATE 3-1)

 Posted 'high noon bells' Wedinzday 1st February 2023

TOON PLAYERS ON A LAP OF HONOUR AT THE END OF THE GAME!

"LOCAL HERO!"

We went into this game needin anly a draw to progress to the final after the 1-0 win in Sooothampton the week before, but from the 'off' NUFC were on the 'front foot' az attacked The Gallowgate goal!



5minutes of pressure paid off when Sean Longstaff hit a sweet shot into the net from a Kieran Trippier pass to send most of the near 52,000 crowd wild with delight!  Aggregate score 2-0 to 'us'



Wor lead woz doubled in the 21st minute when again it woz local lad Longstaff who got hiz 2nd goal from a Miggy Almiron pass to fire home!-----Again the crowd went wild with repeated renditions of the "Tell me ma!" song! An aggregate of 3-0----surely we were home and dry!

Of couse thiz iz The Toon and a misstayk at the back let in Adams who hit a rocket shot past Nick Pope to reduce the errors to 3-1 on the half hour mark!

A norvous 2nd half followed az wor visitors had nee choice but to attack and nearly reduced the 3-1 margin on a few occasions az norves crept into wor side, with wayward passes!


Bruno woz sent off in the 81st minute after a VAR check by the ref for a foul on Edozie's ankle and we played oot the remainin' minutes with just 10 men!-----ELEVEN minutes of stoppage time woz added coz of injuries etc,  az the crowd whistled for the final whistle---and when it eventually came it brought a huge cheer of relief from aall 4 stands!

Wor forst Wembley final this century against most probably Moan U, who hold a 3-0 advantage ower The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham from their forst leg! (That game iz played toooneet)

Now for the mad ticket scramble that will ensue ower the next couple of weeks!----The final at Wembley iz in 25 days time! 

"HOWAY THE LADS!"

Attendance: 51,975 (just 2,500 Saints)

*

VERY HAPPY FANS LEAVIN' THE GROOND AFTER THE MATCH!

*For an explanation of wor nickname for Sooothampton see 'A to Z of club nicknames in heeder bar

Tuesday, 31 January 2023

THE TOON V SOOOTHAMPTON *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI FINAL 2nd LEG *** TOOONEEET!

 Posted 'high noon๐Ÿ”” bells' Tuezday 31st January 2023



Tooneet at SJP we play wor biggest game for 23 years in wor quest to get to Wembley in The Leegue Cup final! ('8:00 bells' kick off----live on SKY)

NUFC have a 1-0 advantage from the forst leg last Tuezday and we can anly hope that we dont baalls it up!

We are odds on to reach the final, az are Moan U who play Forest tomorrow with a 3 goals advantage in their semi!

It will be a norvy 90 minutes (or 120 if extra time iz needed!---plus pens!)

This iz where we want to be----challengin' for trophies once again!

Lets aall cheer 'The Toon' on to victory and dream of Wembley on February 26th!

"HOWAY THE LADS!"


A full 'Geordie Times' match report will appear here sometime tomorrow----lets hope (and pray!) that its a great report!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"

Monday, 30 January 2023

HE'S AZ QUICK AZ A FLASH!"

 Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 30th January 2023

Updated Tuezday '11:45am bells'



It's now official!  Az soon az yoo see a player in front of The East Stand sign in a Toon top, twirlin' a black n white scarf above hiz heed, yoo know its a 'done deal'!



In this case a £45 million 'done deal' makin wor new 21 year old winger Anthony 'Flash' Gordon the 2nd highest transfer fee in wor history! (Isak iz the most ever at £60 million quid!)




"WELCOME TO TYNESIDE ANTHONY!"

Updated Tuezday '11:45am bells'

Right back Harrison Ashby haz aalso signed from West 'am for a reported £3 million quid!
"Welcome to Tyneside Harrison!"


Saturday, 28 January 2023

EVAATONIANS HAVE ANLY GOT THEMSELVES TO BLAME!

 Posted '2:19pm๐Ÿ”” bells' Saturday 28th January 2023

Updated Sunday '11:42am bells'

GRAINY PIC OF ANTHONY GORDON AT THE NUFC TRAINNIN' GROOND THIS MORNIN'!

"GET OUT OF OUR CLUB!"----"HE HAZ--HE HAZ!!!"

News that 21 year old winger Anthony Gordon iz on Tyneside az we speak to sign for us iz deein the rounds!--A fee of aroond aboot £40 million with £5 million add ons haz been mentioned!

The Evaatin boyhood fan haz been hounded out of hiz club by toxic fans seen chasin hiz car doon one of the narrow streets that surroond Goodison Park, with fans blockin' hiz and othaa players exit after their loss to Sooothampton last week with traffic bollards! (In Livaapoool's colours az well!)

The video which iz deein the rounds on twitter etc shows fans shoutin "Get out of our club!" and singin the "Your not fit to wear the shirt!" song!

Gordon hazzint been playin well lately and who can blame him, when at the back of hiz mind he knows that it will be toxic after a game, shud Evaatin lose!---It certainly doesn't help!---does it?

Directors have been attacked with one woman director bein put in a heedlock by a 'fan'?---and told to stay away--or else face the consequences! (They DID stay away!) 

Divvint get me wrang, but we naa a few Evaatin fans who we meet in 'The Barlow Arms' near the groond, before and after games doon there--and they are canny people, who wouldn't dream of deein such things!

They are NOT aall toxic by any meeenz!

Other news that Kieran Trippier haz signed an extention to hiz contract til 2025 iz more good news aheed of wor biggest game for 23 years (The last time we were in a domestic cup semi final) on Tuesday against Sooothampton, for a place at the new Wembley in The Leegue Cup final on February 26th!

Aall we can say iz:---"Welcome to Tyneside Anthony!"---And we promise that we won't put any road block barricades up on Barrack Road (The main road ootside SJP) to stop yoo from leavin' after a game---win, draw or lose! 

MORE SIGHTINGS OF 'FLASH ⚡ GORDON'!




METRO CENTRE, GATESHEEED

Thursday, 26 January 2023

THE SKY'S THE LIMIT!-----NEXT EIGHT GAMES LIVE ON THE TELLY!

 Posted '1:30p bells' Thorzday 26th January 2023



NUFC's popularity iz good news for armchair 'can' fans and pub plonnkies, az wor next 8 (EIGHT!) games are live on eethaa SKY or BT!---But not such good news for The Toon Travellers who actually gan to the games!

6 (SIX!) on SKY and 2 on BT!----The dates and times are!---

JANUARY

Tue 31st  The Simon Templar Mob of Sooothampton Home (LC) '8:00 bells' SKY

FEBRUARY

Sat 4th  The Jellied Eels Mob of West 'am Home '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 11th Bournemoooth Away '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 18th The Liverbirds Home '5:30 bells' SKY

Sat 25th Nee Where Near Brightin Home '12:30 bells' BT (Will be caalled off if we reach the Leegue Cup final at Wembley on Sun 26th Feb)

MARCH

Sat 4th The Blue Moonies of Man Siteee Away '12:30 bells' BT

Sun 12th Wolverhampton Wanabeez Home '4:30 bells' SKY

Fri 17th The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham Away 8:00 bells SKY




Wednesday, 25 January 2023

THE SIMON TEMPLAR MOB OF SOOOTHAMPTON 0 THE TOON 1 *** LEEGUE CUP SEMI-FINAL 1st LEG

 Posted 'on the trains back yem from '9:44am bells onwards, Wedinzday 25th January 2023

TOON FANS AND PLAYERS CELEBRATE WOR VICTORY!

"WEMBLEY ON THE HORIZON!"


*A great day for aall NUFC fans at St. Mary's and anothaa record broken az this woz the forst time we have won an away semi final leg of any competition!  (Wor 2 previous semi final away legs ended in a 1-0 defeat to Sporz in the 1976 Leegue Cup semi final and a 0-0 draw v Rangers in the Fairs Cup in 1969--both games attended by little old me!)

TOON IN DARK BLUE AND YELLOW   VIEW FROM ROW 'L'

It wasnt a good game by any meeenz, with wayward off target shots by Willock, Longstaff and Joelinton in particular!



Joelinton made up for hiz errors when super sub Isak ran doon the wing and crossed the baall for Joe to fire into the net from close range in the 73rd minute to send the 3,200 Toon fans behind that goal into celebratory mode! 


VIEW OF BLONDIE'S HEED FROM ROW 'L'!

2 disallowed goals for both sides for hand baalls and a Sooothampton dismissal late on meant that we played oot the last few minutes against 10 men!



The result meeenz that Sooothampton must win at SJP next Tuesday to progress to the final!

It's aall in wor hands now for a trip to Wembley late next month!  




Attendance: 30,090 (3,200 very happy Toon fans!)

2,000 below capacity!


Anothaa 'celebration' had happened  before the game when we visited wor 100th different boozer this season for away trips! And to dee it before the end of January az well!   But just how many can we dee with the season just beyond the halfway point?๐Ÿค”






Runnin total 101
Plus boozers we had previously been tee when we played Sooothampton in the Premyaa Leegue last November! 
                      ⬇️


THE (BREW)HOUSE OF HORRORS!๐Ÿฅถ


Tuesday, 24 January 2023

SOOOTHAMPTON v THE TOON **** LEEGUE CUP SEMI-FINAL 1st LEG

 Posted '9:20am bells' Tuezday 24th January 2023



Havin' just got back from wor game at Cristill Palliss on Sunday afternooon, we are off on wor travels once again to Sooothampton via King's Cross for wor Leegue Cup semi final tie 1st leg!

In between that aa did mee normal truck run from the Team Valley in Gatesheed to Redditch in deepest Worcestershire---a roond trip of 444miles, finishin' at 4:00am bells this mornin---catchin 2 hours sleep "ZZZzzzz!" and then draggin mee lifeless body oot of mee pit at '7:00bells to catch the 8:58 bells' train back to London!  

Match and booze report will be posted on train on the way back on Wedinzday!

Az per usual "Watch this space!"  

Sunday, 22 January 2023

THE PALLISS 0 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2022-2023

 Posted on train on the way back from 

London from '10:00am ๐Ÿ”” bells' onwards

Sunday 22nd January 2023



The crap view from row 29! (Toon in white and green)


(Brief match report)

"NEWCASIL UNITED WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED!"

Numerous chances from Joelinton, Almiron, Wilson, Isak etc to win this game ended in weak shots and heeders which failed to beat the Palliss keeper, with Nick Pope havin to make just one great save in the 2nd half to deny the home side!



The draw lifted us back into 3rd place in the table and woz wor 15th Premyaa Leegue game in a row undefeated to set a new club record!



It's a game that we will forget within days and if anything, we need somebody to put the baall into the net! 

Nee doubt Steady Eddie will be hunting for one in the window--not lang left before it closes though!







Attendance: 25,350 (2,700 Toon)


Pub crawl report

We visited several boozers, some for the forst time (7), bringin wor total for the season to 97 different boozers! (Includin wor grand tour of Austria where we visited 38 different drinkin dens and NOT 41 az originally posted!) 











⬇️






More 'unusual' photos!








PS; One photo aa didn't manage to get coz aa wasnt quick enough to get mee camera phone workin', woz at King's Cross station, when a lad aboot 20 years old walked in with a single bed mattress tied to hiz back!
HONEST a'm NOT jokin'


Friday, 20 January 2023

THE PALLISS v THE TOON *** TOMORROW EVENIN'

 Posted not lang after 'high noon bells' Friday 20th January 2023

AALL 2,700 AWAY TICKETS ALLOCATED, SOLD OOT STRAIGHT AWAY!

"WOOD HEEDS FOR THE FOREST!"

News that striker Chris Wood iz off to Forest reaches us----'Steady Eddie' told him that hiz game time at The Toon would be limited with both Isak and Wilson fit again---and that he'd be better off gannin to Forest, despite hiz reluctency to leave us!

Chris did a great job last season in helpin us to stay up, with vital goals at the reet time!---He woz aalways a 'stop gap' signin' and we aall wish him well in hiz new venture!--He wont be forgotten!  "Cheers Chris!"

The results ower the last 2 days have certainly gone wor way, az Moan U conceded a last gasp goal at The Palliss on Wedinzday to deny them 3 points in the 1-1 draw---and move just one point above us (instead of 3!) ----and then last neet at Man City, Sporz hoyed away a 2 goal lead at half time to lose 4-2 in dramatic fashion to keep them 5 points behind us in 5th place, with a game more played!

This iz a great opportunity to open up an 8 point gap on them and owertake Moan U to move back into 3rd position in The Premyaa Leegue table!----It won't be easy of course (Az Moan U foond oot!), but the way we are playin', its quite possible to take the 3 precious points in wor quest for Champions Leegue futbaall next season!

'The Geordie Times' will of course bring yoo a full match (and booze!) report az we travel back from London on the train on Sunday mornin'   Az per usual  "Watch This space!" 

Thursday, 19 January 2023

NUFC BACK IN TOP 20 RICH LIST!

 Posted '1:33pm bells' Thorzday 19th January 2023



The latest Deloitte Futbaall rich list haz been annoonced for 2023 and NUFC are back in the top 20 after a 4 year absence!

"ONWARD AND UPWARD!"

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