Thursday, 31 October 2024

THE TOON 2. THE CHELSEEE PENSIONERS 0 *** LEEGUE CUP 4th ROOND

 *Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Thorzday 31st Octobaa 2024



“MUCH BETTER!”

NUFC put in wor best display since we drew with Man City to progress to the qwaataa finals of the competition!

Chelseee fielded a completely different line to the team that beat us 2-1 in the Premyaa Leegue just 3 days orlier—-and paid the price!

Joelinton rattled the post at The Leazes End orly on az we went on the attack—‘aall guns blazin’!

We finally took the lead in the 23rd minute when Sandro Tonali foond ‘Alexander the Great’ (Isak) who hit a sweet shot past Jorgesen in the visitors goal!



The lead woz doubled 3 minutes later when a free kick taken by Lewis Hall foond Isak who crossed the baall to Joe Willock, who heeded goalwards.  Anly for Chelseee’z Disali to slice the baall into his own net, with Kelly bearin’ doon on him!

HT 2-0 to us!

If aa remember correctly Joelinton hit the post again, this time at The Gallowgate End in the second period and we held on for a much needed victory!✌️az The Pensioners (their original nickname) tried in vain to break doon wor defence with The Pope in the Toon goal makin some excellent saves!



We have now just lost one home game since last January— not bad for a team that hazzint been playin’ well!

The draw for the next roond woz watched on by anxious fans after the game in the Leazes End boozer, in fear of gettin’ one of the ‘big boys’ away in the next roond!



But there were loud cheers when we drew The Brentfaad Beez at SJP—wor 3rd home tie in a row!—in other words ‘The 🐝 beez kneez’ az the Cockneys would say!



Attendance: 51,934 (4,883 very loud Pensioners at the start of the game—just half that number of very quiet Pensioners, who had stayed til the bitter end!)

Wednesday, 30 October 2024

THE TOON V THE CHELSEEE PENSIONERS *** LEEGUE CUP 4th ROOND •••TOONEET!

 *Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Wedinzday 30th Octobaa 2024

The Leazes End Stand

NUFC gan into tooneet game at SJP lookin to boonce back from the 2-1 defeat to Chelseee on Sunday in the Premyaa Leegue to try and progress to the 5th roond of the Leegue Cup against the same opponents!

Az we arnt playin well it won’t be an easy game for certain!

Anthony Gordon should retorn after missing the game on Sunday with a groin injury!

The latest Toon stats divvint make good reason’ with not one goal from 50 corners so far this season!—A shockin stat for certain!

Anyway! the game iz a complete selloot, although we arnt sure just how many tickets Chelseee have sold from their 4,800 allocation!?

Hopefully can play a lot better than the last couple of games and that we WILL be in the draw for the next roond come ‘10:30🔔s’ tooneet!? (After the Sporz v Man C game which kicks off at ‘8:15 🛎️s’)

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here sometime on Thorzday! 

Az per usual—-“Watch this space!”

Tuesday, 29 October 2024

MANSFEEELD V NUFC U21s *** EFL TROPHY GROUP H

 *Posted ‘4:00pm bells 🔔’ Tuezday 29th Octobaa 2024   Updated from 7:15 🛎️s onwards



In exactleee 3 hours time NUFC U21s play Mansfeeeld in the EFL Trophy for a place in the last 32 of the competition!

If yoo are gannin then you’d better hurry up az it will take aboot 3 hours to get there via the A1 and MI!

Alternatively yoo can watch it on Sky Sports + at ‘7:00 🔔s’

The Group H table looks like this after 2 games each

Top 2 qualify for the knockout stage!

Rotherham points 6

Braadfaad points 4

NUFC U21s points 2

Mansfeeeld nee points

PS: I am not gannin az I have been there before to watch wor forst team in the Leegue Cup many many 🌙 🌙🌙s ago!—But there will be a few NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers there who have never been! (Will watch it on the telly!)

Footnote: The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers rules are that if we have never been to a groond to watch us, then we MUST gan to tick it off wor list!—Compulsary to gan back if it’s a forst team game, but not  for a reserve team game!            (Rule 37B!)

Watch this space for the result at aboot ‘9:15pm 🛎️s’! ⬇️⬇️⬇️

Updated*from 7:15 🛎️s onwards 



13th minute: goal to Mansfeeeld through Atkins-(shot) 1-0 to them!🥶

28th minute: goal to Mansfeeeld Quinn-(shot) 2-0 to them!🥶

HT 2-0 to them!

68th minute: goal to Mansfeeeld!

Nichols—(fine shot!—game ower!)

3-0 to them!

72nd minute: Attendance announced az 1,311 (72 NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers!)

*86th minute: Penalty to NUFC



Parkinson takes it but it’s easily saved by the Mansfeeeld keeper!

FT LOST 3-0! 💩  to gan to bottom place in the table!



Not wor day!—-And the result meenz that we cannit qualify for the knockoot stage!🥶

The Wembley dream iz ower! 💩

Monday, 28 October 2024

THE CHELSEEE PENSIONERS 2. THE TOON 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘2:22pm bells 🔔’ Munday 28th Octobaa 2024



“WOT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES!”

This time last year we were flyin high in The Champions Leegue havin beaten PSG 4-1 at SJP and not lang before that, hammering Sheff United 8-0 at their place!

Fast forward 12 months and we are a shadow of that team, havin not won for 5 games in the Premyaa Leegue and have slipped from 3rd place in September to 12th place today!

In other words the clocks went back yesterday—-and so did we!

It anly took Chelseee 2 minutes to open the scorin az they attacked The Shed End where the 3,000 Toon fans were situated when Cole Palmer fired home! BUT! after a lengthy VAR check it woz (thankfully!) ruled offside!




Some of wor defendin woz woeful, but we had a great chance to equalise (or so we thought) when Bruno woz hacked doon by Colwill just ootside the box— but incredibly ref Hooper waved ‘play on’ when the Chelseee defender should have been red carded!🥶

Just one minute after this wor hosts DID take the lead in the 18th when Neto sent a low cross in to the unmarked Jackson who shot past The Pope in the Toon goal!

Almiron then missed a great chance for us to level things, but inexplicably shot wide!

We DID however equalise in the 32nd minute when Lewis Hall foond Isak and he had the simple task to fire home from close in! Another lang VAR check followed, but this time the goal woz given! HT 1-1

It didn’t take The pensioners (their old nickname) lang to retake the lead when just 2 minutes after the restart when Lavia sent Cole Palmer through and he shot past Pope on the nearside post for their 2nd goal!



The Toon had 2 great chances to level things again, through Isak.

First a heeder from a Willock cross which woz easily saved and then at ‘the death’ Isak woz clean through and we looked certain to score az Joelinton woz unmarked, but Isak decided to shoot instead from a tight angle az Joelinton looked on in frustration!🥶 and wor last chance woz gone!

Yet another defeat at Stamford Bridge—one more to add to wor bogey groond total (Anfeeeld, The Eitiad and The Emerites to name the other 3)

In the Premyaa Leegue era, we have played here 36 times and won anly twice!—Nee wonder we hate the fcukin’ place!🥶



Attendance: 39,526 (3,000 unhappy Toon fans!)

*Pub crawl report in London***7










PRESIDENT HOTEL BAR






Friday, 25 October 2024

“A BRIDGE TOO FAR!”

*Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Friday 25th Octobaa 2024

 

IF YOU ARE WONDERIN’ WHY WE CAALL THEM ‘THE PENSIONERS’ THEN LOOK AT THIS CHELSEE V NUFC PROGRAMME FROM 110 YEARS AGO IN 1914. NUFC WON 3-0 IN FRONT OF A 20,000 CROWD!


On Sunday at anothaa 💩 kick off time (2 🛎️ bells) we are off to Stamford Bridge to take on The Pensioners of Chelseee in a live telly game! (Sky +)

This iz yet anothaa bogey groond, where we havvint won for 12 years and have anly won 2 ooot of 35 visits in the Premyaa Leegue era!

We hear that Callum Wilson still isnt fit enough to play (when will he ever be?) but are hopeful that Lewis Miley will play some part!

We are on the train 🚂 to King’s Cross on Saturday afternooon and are stayin’ in a hotel in Russell Square at £80 each for a triple room! (£240 aall told!)

The retorn train fare iz £120 WITH 33% off on a Senior rail card and £24:50 for the match ticket! (Senior) So that’s ower £224 each before the tube 🚎fares, ‘desperate dan’ 🥘 (scran) and ‘liquid lubrications’ 🍺 are added on!—It certainly ain’t cheap to gan to London any more!🥶

A full Geordie Times match and boozer report will appear here sometime on Munday!

Az per usual “Watch this space!”

Tuesday, 22 October 2024

“OH ANTHONY GORDON!”

 *Posted ‘5:50pm bells 🔔’ Tuezday 22nd Octobaa 2024



News reaches The Geordie Times that Anthony Gordon haz signed a new extended contract!

He hazzint been in the form he woz last season, but every player gans through a bad patch and we can anly hope that he regains his sharpness!

This iz great news for most Toon fans, although some have their doubts!

Let’s hope he proves the doubters wrang!

Hiz reaction to signin’ the new contract: “I LOVE IT HERE!”

Sunday, 20 October 2024

THE TOON 0. NEE WHERE NEAR BRIGHTIN 1 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-202

 *Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Sunday 20th Octobaa 2024



“BLANKETY BLANK!”

A very frustratin’ day at SJP for certain az we completely dominated the forst 35 minutes az we attacked the Gallowgate End!

Chance after chance went a beggin’ az we pounded Brightin’z goal but we just couldn’t put the baall in the back of the net!

Alexander Isak woz the main culprit, havin missed the baall for ‘an air shot’ reet in front of goal and then had a one to one with their goalie, but instead of roondin’ the keeper he shot straight at him to huge groans from the capacity crowd!



Just after this we paid a heavy price for the miss, when, and with their first attack, Danny Welbeck woz put through and had a ‘one to one’ with ‘The Pope’ in the Toon goal and unlike Isak he made nee misstayk and planted the baall into the corner of the net to huge roars from the 2,000 Brighton fans who had made the 350 mile trek north! HT 0-1 to ‘them’!

Again NUFC came oot with aall guns blazin az we attacked the Leazes End, but 2 big misstaiks by Anthony Gordon who shot straight at their keeper and another chance when he scuffed the baall and the chances were gone!



Aaltogether we had 20 odd shots, with just 6 on target, at least 4 of them from Isak and Gordon, but couldn’t find the equaliser despite 10 minutes added time for a bad injury to goal scorer Welbeck, who woz stretchered off, late on!

Wor forst home defeat for 280 days,and more worringly nee goal in open play for 4 and a half hours!🥶

Attendance: 52,220 (2,000 Seagulls)(Fans that iz!)

We say ‘Nee where near Brightin’ az their groond iz miles away from Brightin in the middle of the nee where in the countryside and yoo have to leave the boozers at least one and a half hours before the game to queue and get a bloody packed train 🚂 to get to the match! (Nee pubs near their groond!)

PS: They didn’t blast ‘Hey Jude’ from the loudspeakers before kick off yesterday, which iz great news az far az we are concerned!  The Beatles are from Liverpoool—-so just why we have been playin it before games iz a complete mystery! 

Aa meeen, Liverpoool or Evaatin divvint blast The Animals ‘House of the Rising Sun’ or Lindisfarne’s ‘Fog on the Tyne’ before their their games!—do they!?



THE PRE MATCH FLAG DISPLAY DIDN’T QUITE GAN TO PLAN!?😵‍💫


Friday, 18 October 2024

THE TOON V NEE WHERE NEAR BRIGHTIN ***PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025

 *Posted ‘high noon 🛎️ bells’ Friday 18th Octobaa 2024

THE SHEAR SCALE OF THE MILBURN STAND CAN BE SEEN FROM THE BACK WINDOWS OF THE LEVEL 7 CONCOURSE, LOOKIN’ UP BARRACK ROAD TOWARDS THE BLACK AND WHITE BULL BOOZER AT THE TOP!

24 MILLION—AND COONTIN’!

After a fortneets rest after another International break, NUFC are back in action tomorrow afternooon v Brighton in an untelivised’3:00 🔔 bells’ kick off at SJP

Alexander Isak iz expected to retorn to the fray after suffering a toe injury, but there are yet again doubts ower Callum Wilson who haz still to feature this season!  Kieran Trippier iz definatleee oot, but there are hopes that Lewis Miley will finally make at least the bench after, like Wilson, missin since last season!

The Toon are seekin’ wor 13th home game withoot a defeat, stretching back to January 13th in a 3-2 defeat v Man City!

That’s 280 days undefeated at SJP come tomorrow. OR 6,720 hours. OR 403,200 minutes!  OR (aboot) 24,192,000 seconds! ⬅️The Geordie Times gives you the undisputed stats, unlike othaa Toon websites!


Tuesday, 15 October 2024

JOYOUS NEWS FOR ‘THE NUFC MAD-SAD GROUNDHOPPERS!”

 *Posted ‘7:24pm bells’ Tuezday 15th Octobaa 2024

"NEW GROOND!---NEW GROOND!"

News that wor Premyaa Leegue home game v The Liverbirds will stay at its original date of Wedinzday 4th Decembaa for live telly on Amazon Prime haz been conformed and iz ‘joyous news’ az it meenz that the game doesn't clash with wor U21s game at Boston United the day before! 

A groond we have never seen The Toon play on! (This will actually be wor 2nd groond visited in Boston!)

The othaa fixtures for live telly have aalso been released (a day late!) for Decembaa and January and this will be a crazy time for 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers'

Wor new hectic itinerary iz below: (Deep breath!) 

(Premyaa Leegue games unless stated)

OCTOBAA:

Sat 19  3:00  Nee Where Near Brightin  H  nee telly

Sun 27  2:00 The Chelsee Pensioners  A  Sky

Wed 30  7:45  The Chelsee Pensioners (Leegue Cup)  H  Sky

NOVEMBAA:

Sat 2 12:30  The Arse  H  TNT

Tue 5  7:45  Tamworth v U21s in National Leegue Cup  Live on National LeegueTV

Sun 10  2:00  The Friar Tuck Mob of Nottingham  A  Sky

Mun 25  8:00  The Jellied Eels Mob of West Ham  H  Sky

Sat 30  3:00  The Cristil Paliss Prats  A  nee telly

DECEMBAA

Tue 3  7:30  Boston United v U21s in National Leegue Cup  nee telly az far az we naa?

Wed 4  7:30  The Liverbirds  H  Amazon Prime

Sat 7  3:00  The Brentfaad Beez Kneez  A  nee telly

Sat 14  3:00 The Basil Brush Brigade of Lestaa  H  nee telly

Sat 21  3:00  Ipswich Toon  A  nee telly

Thu 26  3:00  The Hazbeenz and Villians  H   Amazon Prime

Mun 30th  8:00  Moan U  A  Sky

JANUARY 2025:

Sat 4  12:30  Sporzz  A  TNT

Sat 11-Sun 12  FA CUP 3rd roond  ????

Wed 15  7:30  Wolverhampton Wanabeez  H  TNT

Sat 18  12:30  The Cherry Pickers of Bournemoooth  H  TNT

Sat 25  3:00   The Simon Templar Mob of Sooothampton  A  nee telly 

 



A DIP INTO THE GEORDIE TIMES ARCHIVES. GROUND NUMBER 15

 *Posted ‘high noon bells 🔔’ Tuesday 15th Octobaa 2024

The Premyaa Leegue fixture changes for Decembaa and January were supposed to come oot yesterday—-but DIDN’T!

So to fill a bit of time in av downloaded a game from 1971 at Blackpool, which woz missin from mee archive match reports from 53 years ago! (See below!)👇 

015 bloomfield road, blackpool

 







THE BLACKPOOL KOP AND TOWER AZ IT LOOKED IN 1971

Wednesday, 9 October 2024

SJP. THE OLDEST CURRENT TOP FLIGHT GROOND IN THE WORLD!

 *Posted ‘high noon bells’ Wedinzday 9th Octobaa 2024

THE OLD WEST STAND (NOW THE MILBURN STAND) IN 1901 (NUFC WON 1-0 IN FRONT OF A 20,000 CROWD)

St. James' Park iz currently the oldest top flight football groond in the world, having opened 144 years ago in 1880.

Current Premyaa Leegue clubs who have played at the same grounds since the 19th century

1880 St. James’ Park  1880-1884 Newcastle Rangers, 1886-1892 Newcastle West End, 1892 Newcastle East End, 1892 Newcastle United

1884 Anfield  1884-1892 Everton1892 Liverpool) 

1884 Portman Road  Ipswich Town

1889 Molineux  Wolves

1892  Goodison Park  Everton

1896 Craven Cottage  Fulham

1897 Villa Park  Aston Villa

1898 City Ground  Nottingham Forest

Footnote: Stamford Bridge  (Chelsea) was opened in 1877 as an athletics stadium---Football wasn't played there til 1905 when Chelsea were formed







Monday, 7 October 2024

THE TOFFEE NOSES 0. THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2024-2025 (LAST EVER VISIT)

 *Posted ‘high noon 🔔 bells’ Munday 7th Octobaa 2024 Updated ‘7:00pm 🛎️s’


NUFC IN THE WHITE AND GREEN AWAY STRIP

BLANKETY BLANK!”

This woz wor last ever visit to Goodison Park in the Leegue, before The Toffee Noses move to their new abode beside the river Mersey next season!

Anothaa poor game when the finishing touch of puttin the baall into the back of the net didn’t happen despite numerous chances from various players! (We counted 8 shots in the 2nd half that were not on target!)

The unluckiest shot though, woz Bruno’s shot in the first half, which woz cleared off the line by an Evaatin defender!

In the 35th minute we were awarded a penalty when Tonali woz fouled in the box by Tarkowski. (Alang VAR check resulted in the ref pointing to the spot!)



Anthony Gordon the man Evertonians love to hate took it against Pickford the man Toon fans love to hate!

Unfortunately Gordon shot to the right with a weak effort which woz saved by the SMB which brought a huge roar from the home fans az we held wor heads in wor hands!

Apart from that, in the 2nd half, shots by Joelinton, Gordon and Murphy went wide and the game petered oot into a goalless draw!



(Everton had then missed an open goal near the end)

We are definitely missing Isak and Wilson who both would have surely won the game for us!

That’s 7 Premyaa Leegue games played and 6 of them have been poor!  Despite this we are still in 7th place in the table with 3 wins, 3 draws and 1 defeat! (Includin the Leegue Cup we have lost just ONE oot of NINE!---)

There iz now anothaa International break before we we play wor next game v Brightin a week on Saturday at SJP!

Hopefully both Isak and Wilson are in contention by then!? 🙏🏻 



Attendance: 39,265. (3,000 Toon fans)

PUB CRAWL REPORT:

Just 3 boozers this time!

We stopped in a hotel on the outskirts of Manchester (az it woz much cheaper) and got to the match from there!

MANCHESTER PICCADILLY

LIVERPOOL

LIVERPOOL LIME STREET

UPDATED ‘7:00pm 🔔s’
The late news iz that Man City have won their case against The Premyaa Leegue for unfair competition rules!— This shud be good news for the PIF and NUFC to compete with the best! 🤪👍🏁

Saturday, 5 October 2024

THE TOFFEE NOSES V THE TOON *** SATURDAY EVENIN’ @ ‘5:30 🛎️ BELLS’

 *Posted ‘6:00am 🛎️ bells’ Saturday 5th Octobaa 2024

🎼THIS COULD BE THE LAST TIME!🎼



We heed for Merseyside for the first time this season and it will probably be the last time we will ever play at Goodison Park!

Their brand spankin’ new groond 2 miles away on the banks of the Mersey iz near completion and will be open for the start of next season!

Like NUFC, who we ‘Fink’? will move from SJP in the near future, it’s inevitable that new stadiums with at least 20,000 corporate fans ARE the future! (Sadly!)

I first went to see The Toon play at ‘The Grand Old Lady’ (Az Evertonians affectionately caall it) 53 years ago and apart from The Park End the rest of the groond looks exactly the same today! A relic of the orly 20th century!

Anyway! enough of that!—Wor team line up today iz expected to be missin Isak, who iz still recover in’ from a toe injury, while both Pope and Schar are expected to feature!

Joelinton iz one bookin away from a one game suspension!

Because the trains are fcuked up again, we will be travellin’ doon in mee ‘canny tranny’ (The last train back from Livaapool Lime Street will now anly gan az far az York—and if yoo miss the connection from the last London train, yoo will be stranded!)🥶

A full ‘Geordie Times’ match and booze report will appear here on Munday—So yoo can catch up on the game ‘second hand, first!’


Friday, 4 October 2024

THE ANLY 3 OPTIONS FOR NUFC STADIUM

 *Posted ‘1:00am 🛎️ bells’ Friday 4th Octobaa 2024


“TALKIN’ ‘BOUT MY GENERATION!”

The club’s feezability study and once in a generation investment for the revamp or relocation of NUFC,will be made in orly 2025!

Az far az we are concerned there are anly 3 options!



                           👆
OPTION 1: Stay at iconic SJP and make it az big az possible!
*It will be 144 years this month since futbaall woz first played at SJP by Newcastle Rangers (16th Octobaa 1880)
*NUFC have played there for 132 years, since we were formed in 1892!
We have never played anywhere else!


                                         👆

OPTION 2: Build a new stadium ‘next door’ in Leazes Park next to Barrack Road!           👇




OPTION 3: Build and new stadium on the Arena site next to the Redheugh bridge!       👇



‘Oot of Toon’ options like a stadium near Toon Airport would be a disaster for fans and businesses alike!

NUFC manager haz said that:“Leaving St. James’ Park would feel like betrayal!”

EDDIE HOWE

ARCHIVE GROUNDS MATCH REPORT LIST