Tuesday, 15 September 2015

009 revisited: THE JELLIED EELS MOB 2 THE TOON 0 *** PREMYAA LEEGUE 2015-2016

Date of Last Ever Visit: 14th September 2015
Boleyn Ground, Upton Park, London

West Ham United 2
Newcastle United 0

Premier League
Attendance: 34,907

Updated '11:20pm bells' Tuesday 15th September 2015
Thourvin's free kick failed to find a Toon player
and just after this the home side ran up the field
to score their 2nd goal of the game!
(View from row 'E' of 'The (Clevaa) Trevor Brooking Stand')

"JUST LIKE MY DREAMS, THEY FADE AND DIE!"

Wot the hell can we say?---Yet anothaa aaful away performance from NUFC meanin' that we have scored just ONE goal and taken ONE point from wor last NINE away games! (and NE goals in the last FOWER!)

I reeely hate writin' stuff like this, time and time again!---but anothaa relegation battle looks certain after this debacle, az we hardly bothered 'The Jellied Eels Mob' in wot waz wor last ever appearance here in a leegue game before they move to The Olympic Stadium in Stratford some 4 miles away next season!---On this performance we WONT be gannin there, az we could well be in a different division to them by then!



THE TOON ATTACK THE BOOBY MOORE END (1st half)
(Moore's huge picture can be seen on the right hand side of the stand)
We didn't start off tooo badly and attacked The Bobby Moore Stand in the forst half---but in West Ham's very forst attack they scored in the 9th minute through Payet who volled the baall past Tim Krul into the top corner of the net in front of the Toon faithful!
Many hadn't reached the groond by this point az there waz chaos on the roads AND the tube---and indeed the NUFC team bus got caught up in the snarl az well and the players reportedly had to waalk the last mile to the groond to make the kick off themsels!

Too many players are oot of form includin' wor new signings who had lack lustre games, plus Cisse up front on hiz own <(meanin' we had 'set wor stall oot' for a point!) who seemed disinterested to say the least!

The 2nd half started and we got a free kick straight away in front of The Toon fans housed in The Trevor Brooking Stand.
Thauvin took it from 30 yards oot--- but hiz weak effort waz cleared upfield and Moses who easily beat Anita, wellied the baall against wor bar---it rebounded oot to Payet and he had the simple task of placin' the baall beyond Krul's reach and to put the game 'oot of reach' for us just 3 minutes after the restart!


VIEW OF 'THE CHICKEN RUN' (left)

Wor heeds were doon at this point and we just didn't have it in us to make a fightback, despite several chances that went 'a beggin' ---especially from Cisse, Janmaat and De Jong!

Yoo probably watched it az well on 'the box' ---in horror!--- az we plunged to the bottom of the table----surely we cant get any lower!?

The Jellied Eels Mob have a club song called 'Bubbles'---one line gans: "Just like my dreams, they fade and die!"----mebeez we shud sing it instead!

After the match we heeded to 'The Overdraft' next to East Ham tube station for the post match 'drownin' of the sorrows' ales--and 'there waz' 'The Wally with the Brolly' on the telly, smilin' and laughin' to the reporter who waz interviewin' him! <("Honest Steve!---this iz NE laughin' matter!") 

Toon team: Krul, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Haidara, Anita(De Jong 60), Colback, Sissoko, Wijnaldum (Aarons 79), Thourvin (Perez 60), Cisse

Attendance: 34,907 (2,200 utterly sick Toon fans!)   

Watford are up next @ St James' next Saturday and the nerves will be janglin' from 'Brollyman McClaren', the players and the lang sufferin' fans----in wot iz now a 'must, must! win game'

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