NUFC FIXTURE CHANGES FOR THE LAST SEVEN GAMES

Posted 'high noon bells' Saturday 4th April 2026  Updated 10:35pm 🛎️ bells’

ST. JAMES' PARK FROM SHERIFF HILL IN GATESHEED, WITH THE CHEVIOT HILLS AND THE ENGLAND/SCOTLAND BORDER ON THE GREY HORIZON, 55 MILES AWAY AT THE TOP OF THE PICTURE!

The fixtures for SIX of wor last seven games have been cast in stone!

Beecoz NUFC have been knocked oot of the FA Cup we have a blank Easter weekend!----And so to get wor 'fix', we will be takin in 'The Bad Blue Boys' of Dunston's 'Northern Premyaa Leegue East' games v ex Futbaall Leegue side Bradfaad Park Avenue this afternoon, in a crucial six pointer, for a play off place ('3:00 bells') and then on Easter Munday its a trip to Newton Aycliffe in Coonty Durham for a '1:00 bells kick off!

Next weekend 'The Geordie Times' iz steamin off to King's Cross once more, when The Toon take on 'The Crystal Cryers' at Selhurst Park in sooth London (2:00 bells') on the Sunday! (12th April) (live on Sky)

Then the followin Saturday (18th April) its a home game v 'The Cherry Pickers' of Bournemoooth' in a non televised game at '3:00 bells'

The game at 'The Arse', iz scheduled for Saturday 25th April at '5:30 bells'--- BUT!--- IF? ---they win away v 'The Simon Templar Mob' of Soothampton in the FA Cup qwaataa finals tooneet, then the game will be moved forward to eethaa Tuezday 21st, Wedinzday 22nd OR Thorzday 23rd April—-Updated ‘10:35pm bells 🔔’ Sooothampton DID win so the game stays at ‘5:30 bells 🔔 Saturday 25th April

Unless they put their youth team oot, we predict an 'Arseholes' win, so the game will be moved to that midweek slot if that happens!

Wor home game v 'Nee Where Near Brighton' will be at '3:00 bells' on Saturday 2nd May az it hazzint been picked for live telly like the Bournemoooth game!

Wor game at 'The Friar Tuck Mob' of Nottingham haz been moved to '2:00 bells' on Sunday 10th May for live telly (Sky)

Anothaa game that could be moved iz wor home game v 'The Jellied Eels Mob' of West Ham'! IF? they beat Leeedz in the FA Cup qwaataa finals tomorrow AND! then win a semi final on the weekend of 25th April, wor game will be moved from Sunday 17th May to a new midweek date (we presume?)

And finallEEE!-- Wor last game of the season away to 'The Cottage Pie Brigade' of Fulham WILL take place on Sunday 24th May at '4:00 bells'! (Aall games kick off at the same time on the final day!)

FORT KNOX!

 Posted ‘high noon 🕛 bells’ Thorzday 2nd April 2026

AT LAST NUFC have got a naming rights sponsor for wor Darsley Park training groond in Benton!

From next season Sooth African sports drink company KNOX will have its name plastered aall ower the place!

KNOX will aalso be on wor training groond gear az well!

The deal iz said to be worth 18 million quid ower 3 seasons!

Az we are caalled NewCASTLE United, mebeez the trainin groond should be caalled FORT Knox from now on? (sic!)

Just a thought! 

54th ANNIVERSARY TODAY!---"APRIL FOOL!---THE JUDGE IZ A GEORDIE!"

Posted '6:00am bells' April Fools Day 2026

BRAMALL LANE AS IT LOOKED IN 1972

On 'April Fools Day' 54 years ago, NUFC visited Bramall Lane in 'The Battle Of Sheffield 1972'
And a report from that day, which starred Toon fan 'Daft Tommy', iz reprinted below in the Geordie Times archive! (ground number 022)

PS: Sadly, 'Daft Tommy' iz nee langer with us! 

RIP Tommy

022 bramall lane sheffield

(GROUND NUMBER 22)
Date of First Visit: APRIL FOOLS DAY! 1972
BRAMALL LANE, SHEFFIELD

SHEFFIELD UNITED 1
NEWCASTLE UNITED 0

(OLD) DIVISION ONE
ATTENDANCE: 28,103 (4,000 Toon fans)





Part One:
"APRIL FOOL!---THE JUDGE IZ A GEORDIE!"

The forst thing that springs to mind aboot this place, is!---- 'The Crystal Rooms', which was (and probably still is) a 'One Armed Bandit' arcade in the centre of Sheffield, as this is where the Toon and the Sheff. 'U' radgies had massive fights in 1972, before and after the match!

Hundreds had travelled doon on the train and many of the 'Leazes End Boot Boys' had simply 'come for a fight', dressed in their 'Prince of Wales' suits, slack braces and the obligatory 'Doc Marten Boots' ---and they were'nt to be disappointed!




As soon as they got off the train they made for the main drinkin' area and marched doon the middle of the road shoutin', "Your' gonna get your' f*****' heads kicked in!" as they made for where they knew the Sheffield 'crew' would be.---and sure enough, they were!---and ready for a 'go' as well!



Before lang, runnin' battles doon the streets between the rival fans ensued with innocent shoppers gettin' caught up in the middle as bottles, bricks and plant pots nicked from a gardenin' shop were hurled (still with the plants inside!) as fans fought each other.




'The Sheffield Dibble' torned up with several 'meat wagons' and 'The Flyin' Squad' collered anybody who looked remotely like a skinheed. (not me, aa hasten to add!—as mee hair was doon mee back at that time!---'Led Zeppelin style'!)


Dustbins and litter bins were hoyed through the plate glass windows by the Newcastle 'nutters', and there were runnin' battles through the streets!




This sent the fans of both sides scatterin' and after a few 'Arthur Scargills' in a sleazy dive we foond, it was time to gan to Bramall Lane. The Toon fans had infiltrated the 'Shoreham End', which was the Sheffield skinheed's 'hard end' at the time, and sporadic fightin' broke oot between the rival fans.


Some of the more sensible Toon fans (alas---not me!) who'd went in the opposite end, were gettin' slagged off by the 'Shoreham Invaders' for 'chickenin' oot' of the 'pagger'.
Aa of course, went with the 'radgie gadgies', (like a lamb to the slaughter!) (bravado---or what?) and stood at the back of the stand with mee black 'n' white scarf on, thinkin' that aat any minute aa would get mee 'heed caved in' as it soon became obvious that we were ootnumbered by wor Sheffield counterparts by aboot fower tih one!




And before lang it 'kicked off'---NOT! the match you understand!, but the fightin' as the 'brave' ootnumbered 'Leazes Enders' charged into the middle of the Shoreham End! (they did have their 'reputations' to think aboot!) led by 'one' 'Doddsy' in his 'trademark' white 'butchers coat' complete with a huge Doc Marten boot crudely drawn in felt tip pen on the back, with: 'LEAZES END BOOT BOYS', written above it! (he has been mentioned before!)

Loads of Toon and 'Blades' fans got 'lifted' by the Yorkshire 'Dibbles', so aa kept mee heed doon, as ah did'nt fancy bed 'n' breakfast in the 'Dibble Savoy'! (or worse still!—'The Sheffield Royal Infirmary'!)




As the 'propa' match kicked off, there was still 'beadlem' in front of iz, and it was hard to concentrate on the action on the field, instead of the 'action' on the terraces!.

Bramall Lane was a three sided groond back then, with a cricket pitch on the far side, and this totally killed the atmosphere. (Just how the fans on that side could see, withoot a pair of binoculars---is beyond me!)

The Toon were by far the better team that day, with John Tudor and 'Supermac' gannin close on several occasions.

Tony Green and Tommy Gibb had blinders,---BUT!,---it was tih nee avail, and Sheffield took the points with just fower minutes tih gan, when Ford (who'd just came on as a late sub) beat Toon keeper Willie McFaul, with his forst touch off the baall! (which was aalso 'The Blades' forst shot of the game!)

Newcastle manager, 'Smokin' Joe Harvey, (who could'nt believe that wi'd lost!) summed it up after the match, when he said:

"IT'S NOT APRIL FOOLS DAY?---IS IT"???"WELL!----ACTUALLY!!-----JOE!!!"








Part Two:-----(A few weeks later!)




♫OH!-MEE LADS-YIH SHOULD'IV SEEN US GANNIN!♫

scene from The Blaydon Races 1862

One Toon fan who'd been arrested after the match at 'The Crystal Rooms', was a lad caalled 'Daft Tommy', who's, name implies—IS!----as 'Daft as a Brush'!, but tih be honest would'nt (and could'nt) harm a fly or punch hiz way oot of a paper bag!.

Tommy had been caught up in 'The battle of Sheffield' after the match and was nicked and charged with bein' 'drunk and dizzy', which is an offence that yih can plead guilty tee, by letter.






Quite a few had been charged with more serious offences like GBH and affray and HAD to appear personally in court. So!---on the day of the court cases a few weeks after the match, the train was 'chocker' with fans travellin' doon tih Sheffield on charges of affray and 'god naa's what'!.

Then---aall of a sudden, 'Daft Tommy' appeared and jumped on the train. The other Toon fans just stared at him, coz they could'nt work oot what he was deein there!?.






"A THOUGHT YIH WERE PLEADIN' GUILTY BY LETTER, TOMMY?", one fan asked him, with a puzzled look on his face!.

"I AM!", said Tommy, "A'V GOT THE LETTER IN MEE POCKET!!!", he said az he pulled the 'said' letter from hiz 'nanny goat'!

("There's nee answer tih that one!??-------
IS THERE"!???)



"
On their arrival in Sheffield, they heeded straight for the court hoose, where one joker said:
"THE JUDGE IS A GEORDIE, TOMMY!---IF YIH SING THE 'BLAYDON RACES' TO HIM WHEN YIH GAN IN THE DOCK, HE'LL LET YIH OFF!".

SO!---'Daft Tommy' gave the judge a rendition of the 'Geordie National Anthem'-----------
AND GOT FINED 300 quid! FOR CONTEMPT OF COURT!!! (A considerable sum in 1972!)

(There's DEFINITELY! nee answer tih THAT ONE!?????)





Footnote:
Tommy's 'claim tih fame', is that he used tih stand on one of the concrete crash barriers in the middle of the aad 'Gallowgate End', and give the crowd a rendition of the early 'sixties classic', 'LITTLE WHITE BULL!'

Geordie Glossary of Terms & Phrases (for the benefit of 'non Geordie' readers)
(as the words appear)

Toon fans=Newcastle supporters
forst=first
aboot=about
one armed bandit=gambling fruit machine
radgies=hooligans
doon=down
Leazes End Boot Boys=Newcastle hooligans
crew=hooligans
lang=long
the Sheffield dibble=the Sheffield police force
meat wagon=prison van
the flyin' squad=Sheffield police 'snatch squad'
collared=arrested
skinheed=skinhead
mee=my
hoyed=thrown
nutters=idiots
one-nowt=one-nil
Arthur Scargills=gargels=beers!
sleavy dive=run down pub
foond=found
gan=go
hard end=hooligans terrace
oot=out
pagger=fight
radgie gadgies=hooligan fans
heed caved in=head butted/punched
wor=our
tih=to
lang=long
lifted=arrested
Yorkshire dibbles=Yorkshire police force
dibble savoy=police cells
propa=proper
iz=me
groond=ground
withoot=without
gannin'=going
nee=no
fower=four
aalso=also
wi'd=we had
yih=you
should'iv=should have
caalled=called
drunk and dizzy=drunk and disorderly
tee=to
GBH=grevious bodily harm
chocker=full
doon=down
aall=all
coz=because
oot=out
deein'=doing
a'v=I have
nanny goat=coat
heeded=headed
court hoose=magestates court
yih=you
gan=go
aad=old