Friday 18 May 2018

A STAGGERIN' £90,900,000 LOSS FOR BEIN' RELEGATED!

Posted '4:10pm bells' Friday 18th May 2018
The MD's office, SJP

If ever there woz a reason for keepin' Rafa Benitez az manager, it iz the fact that wor relegation in 2016 to The Championship put us ower £90 MILLION QUID in debt, it haz been reported!

The staggerin' difference between The Premyaa Leegue 'gravy train' and The Championship 'lumpy gravy boat', haz been reveeeled by wor MD, known az 'Penfold' to Toon fans!

This woz due to high wages, vastly reduced TV revenue and prize money and turnower woz doon from £125.8 million to £85.7 million!

This woz despite average gates of 51,108 az well!

50,000 fans who regulary gan, plus anotha million or so who watch from afar, KNOW that its imperative that we keep Rafa, or else it will 'aall unravel' yet again and we will end up with some 'toss-pot' in charge like Joke Kinnear!(God forbid!)

Wor beloved owner, known 'affectionately'? az 'The Fat Controller' to Toon fans!, seems to be the anly one who can't see the consequences, should we gan doon again!

One piece of good news iz that West Ham are seemingly after Pellegrini instead of Rafa az their forst choice for new manager now, to replace 'Misery Guts Moyes'!

Lets hope so for aall wor sakes!

"Are yoo readin' this 'Fat Controller'!?"

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