|SJP FROM STOWELL STREET, CHINA TOON|
News reaches us a day late by carrier pigeon that NUFC have received significant queries az to buyin'/investin' 'dosh' into wor club!
A consortium from (mee old) China iz said to be very interested in us and we understand that wor 'beloved' owner, known affectionately az 'The Fat Controller' to Toon fans, is listenin' to aall offers! (Chicken chow mien with fried rice and curry sauce!)
In othaa news--anothaa forst team friendly away to 'The Jam Tarts' iz reported to be in the offin' at Tynecastle Park, Edinburgh---nothin' in writin' yet, though!
The Premyaa Leegue fixtures come oot tomorrow and yoo can bet your bottom dollar that 'The Geordie Times' will publish the fixtures in 'cryptic code'!----which will aalmost definatleee be changed for live telly and teams playin' in Europe!
(Published @ '9:00am bells' we understand)