Monday 29 May 2017

THE DEIGHTON CLUB OR! THE NAGS HEAD?

Posted '1:15pm bells' Munday 29th May 2017
Updated Munday neet!


In approximately one and three qwaataa hours time the £300,000,000 game takes place at Wembley between 'uddersfield Toon and 'The Biscuitmen of Readin' in the Championship play off final, for a place in the Premyaa Leegue! (£170 million for the winners--plus £130 million if they manage to avoid relegation)

That's how much it's estimated it will be worth to the winners!
Thank god that I will be watchin' it on a big screen from 300 miles away in the comfort of 'The Junction' (1st half) and then 'The Crows Nest' (2nd half) in the heart of The Toon and NOT at Wembley, tearin' mee hair oot and chewin' mee fingernails, if 'we' were there!

Wot we want iz a 'uddersfield win, simply because it's much easier to get to than Readin'! (110 miles compared with 350 miles) and if the Yorkshiremen can 'de it', it will be wor 'derby match' next season, az it will be wor nearest away game!

However, sayin' that, we foond a great little boozer in the centre of Readin' caalled 'The Nags Head', which woz one of the best away drinkin' dens visited last season!
 'uddersfield however, aalso have a great little drinkin den' by the name of 'The Deighton Club' aboot a mile from their groond and this would be more preferable to us!

Az a'v said a'm so glad 'we' arnt at Wembley to suffer the 90/120 minutes of wot will be pure torture, especially to the losers! (plus the possibility of a penalty shoot out of course!)


Updated Munday neet!

"IT'S THE DEIGHTON CLUB!"

We said that the above game could gan to a penalty shootout---and that's exactleee wot happened when 'uddersfield won 4-3 on penalties after a scoreless 120 minutes (plus 10 mins injury time!)

A 220 mile roond trip iz much better than a 700 mile roond trip, so we are delighted that 'The Terriers' are in the Premyaa Leegue for the forst time in their history!

The Premyaa Leegue for next season nuw looks like this!
(From short to lang distance!)

North East clubs: ONE!----NUFC! (roond trip (from wor hoose) 3 miles!)

Yorkshire clubs: ONE!----'uddersfield Toon (roond trip 220 miles)

Lancashire clubs includin'  Morseyside: FIVE!----Moan U, Manc Blue Moonies, The Liverbirds, The Toffee Noses of Everton and Bornley (average roond trip 280 miles)

Midland clubs: THREE!---Lestaa, The Baggie Troosers of WBA and The P*ss Potts of Stoke (Average roond trip 400 miles)

London clubs: SIX!----Chelski, Sporz, Fat Sam's Palace (minus Fat Sam!), The Arse, Wotfaad and The Jellied Eels Mob of WHU
(Strictly speakin', Wotfaad are not a London club, BUT are within the M25 London orbital motorway!) (Average roond trip 620 miles)

South coast clubs: THREE!---Sooothampton, Bournemoooth and (ne where near) Brighton (Average roond trip 700 miles)

Welsh clubs: ONE!---Swanzee (roond trip 750 miles)

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