Tuesday, 31 January 2017

GEORDIE TIMES EXCLUUUSIVE!

Posted '11:30am bells' Tuesday 31st January 2017
BACK IN BLACK n WHITE!

 'The Geordie Times' 'secret agent' and club 'insider' tells us that Andros Toonsend iz comin' back to NUFC today! 

Yoo will read aboot it later on today and on the telly!!!!

BUT REMEMBER!---yoo hord this excluuusive news forst in 'The Geordie Times'!---and ne where else!!!!

Monday, 30 January 2017

324 kassam stadium oxford


Ground number 324

Date of First Visit: 28th January 2017

Kassam Stadium, Oxford

 

Oxford United 3

Newcastle United 0

 

FA Cup 4th Roond

Attendance: 11,810 (1,787 Toon fans)

 

“CUP-ITULATION!”--

"AZ THE OXO 'GRAVY TRAIN' COMES OFF THE RAILS!"

 
MITROVIC'S PENALTY MISS! (JUST ABOOT SUMS IT UP!)
(The Toon are in white)

Lets be brutally honest here!---this performance from NUFC’s 2nd string? waz az dire az it gets!

When I saw that Sels waz in goal (wor 3rd choice keeper) yoo just knew wot woz comin’ next!

A line up with 9 changes from wor last game that had me ’finkin’ that a draw waz on the cards and yet anothaa midweek replay---Aa shouldn’t have worried though az these performances seem to be saved for the FA Cup and yet anothaa exit before February haz come! (saves on expensive trips to Wembley in May!---eh!)

 

“WE’VE GOT MORE FANS THAN YOU, NEW-CAS-IL!, NEW-CAS-IL!

 

The day starterd off at 5:45 am bells’ when aa caught the forst bus to the Toon and then onward by train to---DURHAM!

‘Jimmy the Riddle’ woz pickin’ us up there (‘us bein’ me and ‘Adam (without) Aunt’ az the train fare aall the way to Oxfaad waz a mouth waaterin’ £144!  It cost me the grand total of £5.10 for a retorn ticket to Durham and £30 for petrol in Jimmy’s Mag-mobile’ (see photo!)
'THE MAG-MOBILE'!
"I told Jimmy in no uncertain terms that the only way I would travel to Oxfaad
by car would be in a one with black n white stripes!---
 SO!--- he went oot and bought one!"

A bit cheaper than the train fare ‘aall the way doon’---so that waz the way we travelled!

 

At the Central there were loads of people wearin’ claret n blue scarves and hats and not one person wearin’ any Toon gear?

 

Were they Gatesheed fans heedin’ for Torquay (where The Heed were playin’ (Gatesheed’s 2nd strip iz claret n blue) or some rugby club heedin’ somewhere?

Mee curiosity got the better of me and aa asked one of them ‘who there were and where were they gannin’?

 

“SOOTH SHEELDZ!” came the reply---“We’re playin’ Solent from Sooothampton in the FA Vase!”

 

The carriage I woz in on the train to King’s Cross waz packed with them and not a Toon fan in sight (£144 probably put them off!)

And then—just before the train pulled oot one of mee travellin’ companions torned up, namely 'Adam (withoot) Aunt' <(he NEVA brings hiz aunty!)

 

We got off at Durham az planned and Jimmy waz waitin’ in hiz ‘Mag-mobile’ to whisk us away to Oxfaad!

On the way we picked Adam’s daddy up at Northampton sorvices (he lives there) < (Eh!--Northampton NOT the sorvices!) who woz caalled Brian and we sped off towards wor final destination!

 

Oxfaad’s groond iz some 4 and a half miles from the city centre and the ‘plan’? woz to park there and get a bus into Oxfaad for a few ‘gargels’ with the lads who went aall the way by train!

We parked up next to the away end at ’high noon bells’and heeded for the bus stop, a 10 minute waalk away on the Blackbird Leys estate! <(where there were riots in the 1990’s !)

The bus jorney woz torturous az we made wor way through heavy traffic—passin’ several ‘drinkin’ dens’ on the way!—It woz takin’ ages and I suggested we get off at the next boozer az time woz getting on (‘12:20 bells’ by this time) 'Jimmy the Riddle' woz havin non of it!

“We’ll stay on and meet the lads!” he exclaimed, addin’ that az HE woz the driver and couldn’t drink anyway,  he wasn’t bothered aboot the rest of us getting’ wor pre match gargels! <(SELFISH B*****D!)

We eventually arrived in the centre some 30 mins after getting’ on the bus!---but ended up a lang way from where wor companions were drinkin’!---This woz because the postcode they gave us to tell us where they were woz WRANG (OX1 1SU instead of OX1 3SU!) so we decided that az it woz now ‘qwaataa to one bells’ to heed for the nearest hostelry instead just around the corner from where we were!


 

The rest of them eventually foond us (“HORRAY!”) and ‘Colonel Gadaffi’ said that there woz a ‘hysterical’ pub alang the road caalled ‘The Chequers’ (see photo!) which woz wor next ‘port o call’

We went there but it wasn’t that ‘hysterical’—more ‘historical’ (‘The Colonel’ IZ getting’ on a bit!) and soon it woz time to heed back to the groond and face the torturous 30 minute retorn jorney!
HISTORICAL OR HYSTERICAL?

 

We made it with a little time to spare and heeded for the away end where the 1,800 or so Toon fans were housed!

 
"SING IN THE CAR PARK!"

We needn’t have bothered comin’ az Rafa sent oot a resorve team who didn’t seem to be ‘up for it’!
THE TOON ATTACK 'THE OXO ULTRAS END' (1st half)

Really we shud have been aheed at the break but fluffed chances cost us and the 2nd half woz a different story!
ACTION IN FRONT OF THE MAIN STAND

With ‘The Oxo Ultras’ fans behind the far goal and the home side kickin’ that way, they were aheed barley 30 seconds after the restart when Hemmings scrambled the baall into the back of wor net from a corner kick!

And then in the 66th minute we had a bit of luck az Mitrovic woz bundled ower in the box and the ref gave us a penalty. Mitrovic took it himself but predictableee he missed it by placin’ the baall just to the right of their keeper who managed to parry the baall away to cheers from The Oxo mob’

It woz soon 2-0 after this az wor heeds dropped! Anothaa corner which woz heeded in by Nelson to ‘finish us off’!

 

The 3rd and final humiliation came just before the end when Martinez heeded in from yet anothaa corner to send many of The Toon fans to the exits!

 

Yet anothaa ‘’Disaster Day’ for the faithful to endure and from a personal point of view this waz the SEVENTEENTH TIME av seen NUFC lose to opposition from a lower division in the FA Cup!!!!

"WE WOZ THERE!"---"UNFORTUNATLEEEE!"
 

Toon (resorve!) team: Sels, Gamez, Haidera (Richie 77), Hanley, Good, Hayden, Barlaser, Lazaar, Perez, Mitrovic, El Mhanni (Gouffran 68) 
"THE PREMYAA LEEGUE 'GRAVY TRAIN' IZ ALL THAT MATTERS'!"
   
*
SPOT THE DIFFERENCE!
'Adam (withoot) Aunt' in 'The Mag-mobile' to Oxfaad! ^^^^^^
'Adam (withoot) Aunt' in club in Blackborn! ^^^^^^

Sunday, 29 January 2017

GEORDIE TIMES COMMENT!

Posted '9:33am bells Sunday 29th January 2017
SOMEWHERE IN THE 'AWAY END' AT OXFAAD YESTERDAY!

We here at 'The Geordie Times' are in complete shell-shock after yesterdays events at Oxfaad!
YET anothaa cup disaster day to add to the very long list!

For this reason it might take us some time to complete the 'match'? report on this game!

Pleeeze bear with us and the 'disaster day report'  will appear here---eventually!

Friday, 27 January 2017

THE OXO GRAVY GRANUELS MOB v THE TOON *** TOMORROW AFTERNOOON!

Posted '8:48pm bells' Friday 27th January 2017
"THE TOON GRAVY TRAIN IS COMIN'!"---PASS THE OXO PLEEEEZE!"

Tomorrow, and anly for the THORD time this century we are playin' on a NEW groond for an FA Cup tie!

The othaaz bein' Cheltenham in 2006 and (ne Where Near!)Brighton in 2012!

In total this will be mee 108th leegue groond visited watchin' The Toon of the CURRENT teams in the Futbaall Leegue! (IF? aa make it to the 'Kassam'!)
80 in total if yi DIVVINT include the old groonds! (Maine Road, Highbury, Joker Park etc!)

The decision waz made that it would be 'train' to Durham and then 'car' to Oxfaad, az the train fare of £144 retorn woz considered tooooo much by many of us!
Jimmy (the Riddle) who lives near Durham had said that he would take hiz 'jam-jar' if the train fare woz 'too high'  <(£144 sureleee iz!) and so the decision woz made to gan with him! (£7 train retorn to Durham--£30 in petrol each to Oxfaad and back!)

1,800 Toon fans will be present in the 12,000 capacity crowd

There will of course be a FULL Geordie Times match report which will be online sometime on Sunday--(or Munday if we 'baallz it up'!)

Thursday, 26 January 2017

SMBs U18s 3 THE TOON U18s 4 *** FA YOUTH CUP 5th ROOND

Posted 'high noon bells' Thorsday 26th January 2017
THE TOON PLAYERS CELEBRATE McNALL'S LATE WINNER
 @ 'THE STADIUM DE HOLE'!

The Toon's youngins won an epic thriller @ Hetton-the -Hole last neet to reach the qwaataa final of Youth Cup to twist the knife even forthaa into the mackems!

The goal sequences were az follows:

15th minute: 1-0 to us: McNall tucks away a penalty to give us the advantage az mackem manager 'Misery Moyesy' looks on!

20th minute: 2-0 to us: Wor lead woz doubled when Owen Bailey lifted the baall ower the smb keeper!

53rd minute: 2-1: The mackems pull one back to put them back in the tie

68th minute: 3-1 to us: Wilson restores wor 2 goal lead with a powerful shot az the mackems misfit manager 'Misery Moyesy' heeds for the exit, with the white flag of surrender in the air! (he probably went to get some anti-depressant drugs!)

76th minute: 3-2: The smb score from penalty spot

79th minute: 3-3: Disaster! az the mackems level things with a tap in goal!---extra time looms!

86th minute: 4-3 to 'US'!: McNall saves the day az he calmly beats a defender and cooly places the baall into the back of the net to win this dramatic cup tie, az the sprinklin' of Toon fans celebrate amongst the 1,009 crowd!

Brilliant victory against the arch enemy to put us in the qwaataa finals!

Wednesday, 25 January 2017

SMB U18s v THE TOON U18s *** FA YOUTH CUP 5th ROOND *** TOONEET

Posted 'high noon bells' Wednesday 25th January 2017

Wor junior side are in action toneet @ Hetton the Hole, where we take on the mackems equivalent in an Youth Cup tie.
The Eppleton Welfare Groond will host the game and by a strange quirk of fate it will be played in the same week of  January az wor one and anly visit here back in 2009 (when wor resorves won 2-1)

That day 8 years ago in 2009 waz aalso the day of loyal Toon fan and friend 'Jonezee's funeral in Tynemouth (see archive report below)     
RIP 'JONEZEE' you will never be forgotten by us!

268 welfare ground hetton le hole (v s/land reserves)


(GROUND NUMBER 268)

Date of First Visit: 21st JANUARY 2009

WELFARE GROUND, HETTON LE HOLE
(aka 'The Stadium De Hole'!)



mACKEM RESERVES  1

NEWCASTLE UNITED RESERVES  2  (Ranger, Godsmark)



FA PREMIER RESERVE LEAGUE NORTH

ATTENDANCE: 1,516  (not many Toon fans!)





“FOR JONEZEE!”



It was a very sad day for aall concerned as this was aalso the day of Jonezee’s funeral at Tynemouth crem orlier on that mornin’. Jonezee had sadly passed away a fortneet orlier
He had a black ‘n’ white striped coffin and his family’s request that mourners should wear sommik black ‘n’ white was observed by all and showed his loyalty for the club. He’d anly missed one home game in forty years and had’nt missed a weekend away game in aall that time eetha, visitin’ ower 100 different groonds in the process to watch The Toon!

(A ‘TRUE SUPPORTER’! who will be sadly missed by all!)



THIS MATCH REPORT AND VICTORY IS DEDICATED TO HIM!  



After the funeral we heeded for the Waallsend Comrades Club where Jonezee spent
many an hour ‘on the hoy’ to reminisce and to have some (Er!---several!) drinks in his memory!

Wor final ‘port o call’ before heedin’ to the ‘resorve derby’ was the Newcastle Arms in the Toon before cadgin’ a lift with ‘The Mad Professor’ doon to Eppleton FC in Hetton the Hole which was the mackems new ‘second string venue’ for this season. (It shud be noted that ‘Grumpy Stumpy’ opted to stay in the warmth of the bar for a few extra ciders, rather than brave the elements of coonty durham with us!) (part time sensible B******!)





“WEEZ TREES ARE THEEZE!”



On arrival in Hetton the Hole ◄(NO!---this is’nt a misprintt!---it IS! a f*****’ ‘Hole’) we homed in on the floodlights and parked in a street up the hill from the groond.

An aad biddy wearin’ a heedscarf was standin’ at hor front gate and asked us if the game was aall ticket and then telt us in the next breath before we could reply, that shih thought it was!

“Hope not pet!”----“WE haven’t got any!”, The Mad Professor replied as we worriedly heeded for the tornstiles



The ‘panic’ was soon ower as it was ‘pay at the gate’ and aa handed the gadgie a twenty poond note for the three quid admission fee. He looked at the note as though he’d neva eva seen one before? and said in a broad mackem twang-----

“Az tha noowt less, tha naaz?” (Geordie translation:”Have yi got nowt smaaller, like?”)

“NO!”, said ‘I’.    “Az al av tih gih yi yi change in puund cuins az av got ney notes!”, (“aal have ti give yi yi change in poond coins as av got ne notes!”)  he added, az he handed iz  the ticket and plonked SEVENTEEN! poond coins in mee mit! (they obviously have’nt seen fivers or ten poond notes roond theeze parts, eetha!)



It was nuw time to heed for the clubhouse as it was f*****’ freezin’ by this time.

“It’s my torn for the drinks!”, aa said to the lads az aa got mee torn in (and more importantleee, got rid of some of the ‘shrapnel’ that was weighin’ doon mee trooser pockets) and gave ‘Dave from York’ a refreshin’ pint of ‘Stones Gold’, a new beer for him.



Now Dave, you see, is on a one man mission this season----a ‘mission’ to drink as many different named pints as he can! and like a smaall child he gleefully entered the new beer in his notebook, nearly snappin’ his Ladbrokes pen in the process as he did so! (he’s an very old OAP actually!) (Old Aged Piss-artist!)



“That’s mee 150th different beer so far watchin’ The Toon!”, he said in a treblin’ voice as he shook the said ‘liquid refreshment’ excitedly in his mit! (NO!---we’re NOT! caalled the sad b******s for nothin’!)



It was soon time to heed for the terraces and by this time it had started to rain so we took shelter under some trees on the far side of the pitch as the smaall main stand opposite was chocker block.

A quick look at the team sheet brought a mackem scurryin ower towards iz for a look at who was playin’. “Uwz wa numbih sivin tha naaz?” (“who’s wor number seven, like?) he asked, obviously thinkin’ that aa was ‘one of them’! (god forbid!)

He had a quick look before heedin’ for the perimeter fence to tell his mate.



The match kicked off and aa once more took the team sheet from mee sky rocket as aa was’nt sure of a couple of wor players.

Like a ‘red rag to a bull’ the sight of the A4, one page team sheet again brought another mackem from the trees beside us, askin’ for a look!  (needless to say---aa did’nt fancy this gannin on aall the time, so!, aa kept it under ‘tight wraps’ afta that and it remained in mee trooza pocket for the rest of the match!) 



Just a few minutes after the kick off the sleet started comin’ doon and wor otha travellin’ companion ‘The Caped Crusader’, who was standin’ next to ‘The Mad Professor’ at the front, was shakin’ with the cold and was wavin’ his arms aboot to try and keep waam, but it was a futile exercise in the inclement conditions.



However!---after twenty minutes he did have ‘good reason’ to wave his arms aboot when wor bizarrely named number nine, Nile Ranger put the Toon in front with a nicely placed heeder from a Mark Doninger corner kick.



Unfortunately, the home side levelled just after this when Toon goalie Frazer Forster parried a shot, anly for the mackem number nine to tap home. The loudspeaker then boomed oot that David Dowson had scored for them!-----a name a’m not unfamiliar with as aa used to knock aboot with a Toon fan of the same name in the seventies!

(it definitely was’nt him!)



At half time we heeded back to the warmth of the clubhoose to quensh wor thirsts where aa bumped into a Toon fan who aa naa caalled Wayne.

He actually lives in Hetton and telt us that ‘The Hole’ was 101% mackem and point 1% Geordie (ie: HIM!)



The second period started with wind, rain and sleet to greet us on wor retorn to ‘The Weez Trees Embankment’ (as it was now known!) but as there were ne leaves on the branches it gave us virtually zero protection from the incessant downpour. (and so ‘in effect!’---it was f*****’ pointless standin’ there!???)



Five mins after the restart torned oot to be the tornin’ point of the game in wor favour, when the mackems had a goal disallowed for offside. The resultin’ free kick was quickly taken by  The Toon and Jonny Godsmark raced into home penalty area and latched onto a James Taylor through baall (na- not the singer!) to slam the baall into the net for wot torned oot to be the winner! (which brought muted applause from the sparse Toon followin’!)



An aad mackem gadgie aged aboot 75, who was wearin’ a pair of ‘Joe 90’ specs complete with beer glass bottomed lenses, then rushed towards the perimeter fence to remonstrate with the referee ower the legality of the goal, wavin’ his ‘Gregory Pecks’ menacingly towards the official, shoutin’, “ah think thaa neids theeze, ref!” (“aa think yi need glasses, ref!”)---but it was tooo late!---(ha! ha!) and the goal stood!---2-1!



More incidents were to follow when a mackem midfielder was sent off 12 mins from time for a second bookable offence and then in the last minute of the game The Toon’s Hungarian number 6 Tamas Kagar tragically broke his leg after he went doon in the box. This added TEN minutes injury time to the match and we prayed that we would hold oot as the rain and sleet lashed doon!-------we did!---to claim the victory for Jonezee! ----This was for you mate!  R.I.P.

 

©Fink™ (the mad-sad gr☺undh☺pper!)

 

Monday, 23 January 2017

SWANZEE U23s 2 THE TOON U23s 1 *** LANDORE TRAININ' GROOND, SWANZEEE

Posted 'high noon bells' Munday 23rd January 2017
(4 DAYS LATE!--BUT THIS IZ 'THE GEORDIE TIMES'!)
'DAVE FROM YORK' SENT US THIS 'ACTION SHOT' AZ THE TEAMS LINE UP!
(THE TOON ARE IN BLACK n GOLD)

Anly TWO of 'The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' made it to Swanzee for the U23s Leegue Cup tie @ Landore (last Friday)!
They were 'Dave from York' who travelled there on hiz FREE train pass via Manchester---and 'Glennn from Ashington' who 'slummed it' by bus at great expense!
Swanzee's Landore trainin' groond iz just alang the road from The Liberty Stadium and so it wasn't tooo hard for them to find! (havin' (of course) been to 'The Liberty' before for previous NUFC forst team games!)

The Toon took the lead in the 15th minute when Adam Wilson fired in from the edge of the box---but that's az good az it got!
We held on til half time but at the midpoint of the 2nd half the home side equalised through Baibi and then just 6 minutes later Maric wrapped it up for Swanzee after hiz effort hit the post and he tapped in the rebound!

After the match Dave caught the train back to London--and then York, while Glennn stopped off at Bristol to watch Bristol play Plymouth in a BASKETBAALL MATCH!? <(the sadness just gets worse!!!!)

Sunday, 22 January 2017

THE TOON 4 THE NEW YORK YORKIES 0 *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted '11:35am bells' Sunday 22nd January 2017

1st HALF ACTION AZ THE TOON ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE GOAL

The 3,200 'Yorkies' must have thought it waz a cup final az they packed the away end with 3,200 followers!

Rothaaham made it az difficult az possible in the forst half az they wasted time az orly az the 10th minute when the baall went oot for a throw in to them and nebody went to take it!--- and their goalie then wasted time takin' goal kicks!  (they must have been hopin' for a 'replay' back at their place!)

Scythin' tackles then went in from them az they battled away and every rare corner they got waz greeted az though they scored the winnin' goal!

We just couldn't break them doon and then in the 38th minute a scary moment for us. Karl Darlow went to collect them baall on the edge of the box at The Leazes End but fumbled and lost the baall. 
A Rothaaham forward quickly got to the baall and centred to the middle az Darlow scrambled to get back to hiz goal.
A shot came in which looked certain to end up in the back of the net, but wor goalie somehow managed to get back and parry the baall away to save wor bacon!---a brilliant save to make up for hiz misstayk!

And then deep into injury time 'we' made the breakthrough when a Yedlin cross foond Daryl Murphy and he fired left footed across the box to send us in 1-0 up at half time @ The Gallowgate End.
2nd HALF PRESSURE AZ WE ATTACK THE LEAZES END

The 2nd half waz much easier for us az we pounded the Leazes goal and we doubled wor lead with just 4 minutes gone when Matt Richie fired in from the 6 yard box!
'The Yorkies' were 'done' by this goal, with ne time wastin' from them after this (aa wonder why?)
It waz aall 'one way traffic' and the 3rd goal came 10 mins later when Perez got in on the act with a goal from close range!
JAMIE CELEBRATES WOR 3rd GOAL!

It waz a case of 'how many can we get' now and the 4th and final goal came in the 80th minute when a fantastic through baall from Jonjo Shelvey foond Matt Richie and he raced away towards the goal and placed hiz left foot shot with deadly accuracy to finish off poor Rothaaham.
By this time half their 3,200 fans had left their seats and their cup final dream waz ower for anothaa 30 odd years (the last time we played them in the leegue!)

Summary: NUFC are now 9 points clear of 3rd placed 'uddersfield and leapfrog Brighton once again to reclaim top spot!----while the team from the 'New York Stadium' find themselz 9 points adrift of safety in bottom spot!

Toon team: Darlow Yedlin (Sterry 79), Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Richie, Hayden, Shelvey, Gouffran (Sammy Ameobi! 63), Perez, Murphy (Lazaar 74)

ROTHAAHAM FANS IN THE TOP DECK OF THE LEAZES

Attendance: 52, 208 (against ROTHAAHAM?) (3,200 'New Yorkers'!)  The crowd waz just 20 shy of wor highest of the season--v Forest!

*ROOM WITH A VIEW! 
VIEW OF SJP FROM 3rd FLOOR OF IRISH CLUB
      
"I'VE SEEN THE LIGHT!"
GLOW OF THE FLOODLIGHTS FROM TILLY'S BAR!

Saturday, 21 January 2017

THE TOON v THE NEW YORK YORKIES *** EFL 2016-2017

Posted '10:24am bells' Saturday 21st January 2017
SOMEWHERE IN NEW YORK (ROTHERHAM!)

Today we face the bottom side in the division in the shape of  The men from the New York Stadium in Rotherham

An easy 3 points yoo might say az they look certainties for relegation---BUT! this IZ NUFC of course and anythin' can happen!?

It's their 'cup final' and 'The New York Yorkies' <(wot else could we call them?) have sold their entire allocation of 3,200 tickets for level 7 of The Leazes End!
We here through the grapevine that anly odd seats are left in the home sections of the ground----so a 52,000 iz likely!---against ROTHERHAM? <(are we mad?)

Brighton won last neet to gan back to the top of the table so a victory iz vital!

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here tomorrow sometime---as per usual "watch this space!"

Friday, 20 January 2017

"BRIGHTON BOMBSHELL!"

Posted '1:17pm bells'  Friday 20th January 2017
"AMEX,AMEX HERE WE COME!---BUT WHEN!?"

News that wor away game at 'Ne Where Near Brighton' haz been rescheduled to Tuesday 28th February haz reached us!
HOWEVER!--shud eethaa 'us' or Brighton progress to the 5th roond of the FA Cup AND need a replay,then that game will be moved at very short notice for the THORD time!

The Toon had asked for a date later in the season that wouldn't clash with replays
But the EFL and SKY said: "NO! you will play when we tell you!"
(Brighton aalso objected to wor request!)
This meeenz we are left in limbo once again az we cant book any trains or hotels for fear of it bein' re-rescheduled!!!

The Brentfaad game last week for example waz moved from last Munday to last Saturday at very short notice as we had a cup replay with Bormingham on Wednesday neet!
It cost me £88 on the train WITH a railcard---it would have been £122 withoot! (had aa been able to book well in advance it would have cost less than £50!)

The Saturday after Brighton we are away to 'uddersfield and then anothaa away game against 'The Biscuitmen'of Reading on a Tuesday neet!---that's THREE away games in SEVEN days!

They couldn't give a S**T! aboot 'us' ---could they!

Thursday, 19 January 2017

THE TOON 3 THE BLUE NOSES OF BORMINGHAM 1 *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND REPLAY

Posted '11:50am bells' Thorsday 19th January 2017
MATT RICHIE SCORES FROM THE SPOT AT THE LEAZES END!
(Get your binoculars oot!)

Yet anothaa under par performance from us with albeit a changed team from the one at Brentfaad last Saturday, but a victory ne less, to propel us into the 'dizzy heights' of the 4th roond!

The sequence of events were az follows:
10th minute: "GOAL!": After dominatin' the forst few minutes we earn a penalty when a through pass from Shelvey finds Gouffran who iz hacked doon in the box at The Leazes End!
Matt Richie elects to tek the penalty and he blasts the baall doon the middle to put us 1-0 up! (see top pic!)
MILBURN STAND

32nd minute: 'Goofy' attempts a flick at the far post and hiz effort hits the woodwork, but the baall rebounds oot to safety!

35th minute: "GOAL!": Shelvey hammers a kick into the area and 'Goofy' Gouffran (with hiz back to the goal) torns and fires home past the hapless Legzdins in the Bormingham goal--we are cruisin'!
EAST STAND

42nd minute: We hit the post again!--this time through Richie, but again Bormingham get lucky and the baall gans oot of play!
HT 2-0 to 'us'!

72nd minute: "goal!": Typical Toon! We let the 'Blue Noses' back into the game when Cotterill shoots through wor crowded defence!---It's finger nail bitin' time folks!
PICTURE OF THE LEAZES END BY JAMIE AGED 7

92nd minute: "GOAL!": Bormingham have pressed for an equaliser and the dreaded extra time and penalties looked on the cards--BUT!
Jonjo Shelvey runs doon the right wing and crosses for Matt Richie who toe pokes the baall in to the back of the net to win the game!
3-1 final score!
THE TOON ATTACK THE GALLOWGATE GOAL

The NUFC mad-sad groundhoppers' now face a 'mooth waaterin' trip to a new groond in the next roond, when we will play!--- (wait for it!)-- 'The Oxo Gravy Granules Mob' of Oxfaad <(it had to be!) at the Kassam Stadium a week on Saturday"!

Toon team: Sels, Yedlin (Hayden 74), Hanley, Findlay, Lazaar, Richie, Shelvey, Tiote (Colback 81), Barlaser, El Mhanni (Perez 69), Gouffran

Attendance: 34, 896 (700 Blue Noses)
The attendance waz double the next hghest in the replays (Plymouth  17,000) 
*   

Wednesday, 18 January 2017

"THE GEORDIE TIMES IZ BACK!!!!!!!"

Posted 'high noon bells' Tuesday 17th January 2017

After an absence of two and a half months the original 'Geordie Times' iz now back online thanx to 'Alex the Website Wizard' who haz somehow managed to get mee old stuff back from oblivion!
Aaltogether there were ower 1,700 posts plus a canny few pages which would have taken 'forever' to transfor from the old site to the new one!

The new address for the time being iz!
www.geordietimes.blogspot.com and aa hope to get 'geordietimes.com' back in the next few weeks!

If it wasnt' for 'Alex, hiz daddy 'Alex of St George' and 'Dave from York' persuadin' me 'not to give up' before the Brentfaad game on Saturday I would have probably abandoned the attempt to try and renew the old site, which Google/Go Daddy/G Suite made virtually impossible to do so!

They said eetha mee password/user name /pin number waz incorrect and wouldn't let me renew, even though I've used aall 3 off them in the past!---Subsequently the website 'went doon' on 4th November last year and anly now haz it been recovered!

Once again special thanx to 'Alex the Website Wizard', hiz 'daddy' and Dave!

"The drinkx are on mee!---the next time aa see yee!"

THE TOON v THE BLUE NOSES OF BORMINGHAM *** FA CUP 3rd ROOND REPLAY *** TOONEET!

Posted 'high noon bells' Wednesday 18th January 2017

"A BORMINGHAM FAN SPOTTED IN 'THE TOON' THIS MORNIN'!"
("GOD HELP US AALL!")

Tooneet we face Bormingham with a depleted team in this 3rd roond replay at HQ--kick off '7:45 bells'

The followin' players will NOT be available!
Diame, Mbemba and Atsu----aall on international duty!
while Mitrovic, Aarons, Gamez, Hayden, Anita and Gayle---are aall oot due to injuries!
Sammy Ameobi and Jamie Sterry are cup tied and some members of wor development squad have been drafted into the fray!

Shelvey iz available after suspension--but will we risk him?
Ower 30,000 tickets have been sold for the game so far and a crowd of 35,000-40,000 iz predicted by 'us'
THE 'CROWD' AT ST ANDREWS FOR THE 1st GAME! (1-1 DRAW)

A full Geordie Times match report will appear here for the forst time in two and a half months (see above!) sometime tomorrow!

We beat the 'Blue Noses' 4-0 orlier this season at SJP, so lets hope it iz 'US' heedin' for the Kassam Stadium in Oxfaad on Saturday week for the 4th roond tie and not 'them'!?


Monday, 16 January 2017

108 revisited 2017 griffin park brentford

Ground number 108 (revisited 2017)
Date of this Visit: 14th January 2017
Griffin Park, Brentford, London

Brentford 1
Newcastle United 2 (Gayle, Murphy)

EFL Championship
Attendance: 11,435 (1,633 Toon fans)

"DESPICABLE DEEDS IN 'THE GLOBE'!"
A TOON FAN DRINKS FROM A 'mackem' GLASS!!!! ---WORDS FAIL US!!!!

Diary of a Trucker/Toon fan:
Friday afternoon started off for me with mee usual 'night trunk' to Redditch in deepest Worcestershire in mee truck.----A 430 mile roond trip and a got yem at '2 bells' on the Saturday mornin'--just in time for 4 hours shut eye "ZZZZzzzz!!!!"--before gettin' up again to catch the '7:22 bells' train to King's Cross for wor game v Brentfaad in "west Landan"---(another 300 miles travellin' to get there!)

After the 45 minute tube ride from KX to South Ealing (near where Brentfaad play) we heeded for 'The Plough' which iz approx. a mile waalk to the ground (I actually 'nodded off' for a while on the tube az aa waz that tired!)


After a couple of 'gargels'  in 'The Plough' (at up to £5.75 a pint!) it waz 'onward' to 'The Globe' which waz half a mile doon the road--A Brentfaad fans bar for certain az the plastic pint glasses had a Brenfaad player in their red n white striped garb on the side of the glasses!


Aa bought a pint of 'London Pride' not realisin' this, but az soon az a saw 'the horror show' on the glass aa asked the barman for a plain plastic glass, az aa point blank refused to drink from it!
He asked me why? and aa telt him in ne uncertain terms that aa wouldn't drink oot of a 'mackem glass'
He didn't have a clue wot aa waz 'on aboot', but gave me a half pint plain glass az requested and aa poured the broon stuff into it! 
^ ^ ^ "THERE'S 'NE WAY' A'M DRINKIN' OOT OF THAT!"

It shud be noted that loads of Toon fans were drinkin' from the 'said' 'mackem containers'----a despicable act from those of the black n white persuasion! <(don't yoo 'fink'?)

I took a photo of one of 'the culprits'  but haven't dared to show hiz face az he might be recognised and get hiz hoose 'fire-bombed' az a result by angry Toon fans!







"LADY LUCK---AND AALL THAT!"
1st HALF ACTION AT 'WOR END'!-(THE TOON ARE IN BLACK & GOLD)

Anyway!---it waz soon time to heed for the tornstiles where chaotic scenes greeted us az we entered the away section---it woz 'chocker' and we had to fight wor way to wor seats up a flight of stairs!

The view from row 'A' at the front waz brilliant and for some reason 'unbeknown to man nor beast' the game kicked off 7 minutes late at '3:07 bells'?

We went on the attack straight away az we kicked towards wor own fans behind the goal (havin lost the toss!) and within 20 mins we were in front when Dwight Gayle fired a fantastic shot from the far edge of the box from us into the corner of the net to send the 1,600 plus Toon fans in the tiny stands wild with delight! (hiz 20th goal of the season!)
Gayle then suffered a hamstring injury soon after and had to come off!

The goal sprung the home side into 'wake up call' az they went for the equaliser, but we managed to haad on til half time with wor 'precious' one goal lead!

Of course this IZ NUFC and within 7 minutes of the restart Brentfaad levelled things with a scrambled goal and they then went for the winner!
They nearly got it not lang after when they hit the post and the baall ran agonisingly alang the goal line before it waz cleared and aa thought for a second that the ref waz gannin to signal that the baall HAD crossed the line, but wor luck waz defiantly in and he DIDNT!

Then Hayden suffered an injury and waz replaced by Anita, but he lasted just 10 minutes after he waz clattered by a Brentfaad player and waz 'stretchered off' after a 5 minute delay!

And then after the home side were denied 2 penalties and against the run of play we got the winner in the 79th minute when Perez crossed for Daryl Murphy and heeded a fab effort past the Brentfaad keeper! (Murphy had replaced 1st goalscorer Gayle!)
THE TOON ATTACK THE FAR GOAL (2nd half)

Sustained attacks from the home side were thwarted by Karl Darlow in the Toon goal and he waz defiantly wor 'man of the match' az he made several great saves---the last one in the NINTH minute of stoppage time due to Anita's injury! (where DID they get NINE minutes from?)

"A THOOSAND MILES FOR ONE OF YOUR SMILES!"

Anyway!--the ref finally blew hiz whistle at TEN PAST FIVE? (it shud have finished 20 mins orlier, had the game kicked of on time!) and the 3 points were wors!
News that both Brighton (and 'uddersfield) had lost, meant that we were back at the top of the pile--for the time bein' at least!
This brought a smile to wor faces and the 1,000 plus miles travelled endued by me in a day and a half by truck (430 miles) and by train (600 miles roond trip) just to see this game HAD been worth it!---me 'finx'!
"WE WOZ THERE!"

Toon team: Darlow, Yedlin, Lascelles, Clark, Dummett, Hayden (Anita 62---Hanley 72), Colback, Richie, Perez, Gouffran, Gayle (Murphy 28) 

*The post match 'gargels' took place here!"

   
NEAR WARREN STREET TUBE STATION--LONDON




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