Sunday, 11 October 2015

GROUND NUMBER 317 --- CITY FOOTBALL ACADEMY COMPLEX (PITCH 8), MANCHESTER CITY

Ground number 317
Date of First Visit: 10th October 2015
Pitch 8, Academy Complex, Manchester

Manchester City U18s 6
Newcastle United U18s 1 (McNall)

FA Premier U18s League
Attendance: 75 (Estimated by Glennn!) (includin' 3 mad-sad groundhoppers, plus wor number 11s faathaa!)

"PRISONER CELL BLOCK 8!"   ^^^^^^
("IT'S JUST LIKE WATCHIN' THE FORST TEAM!")

Before anybody accuses 'The Geordie Times' of nickin' the above headline off  'nufc.com' , az they have the same one---(the one in brackets) then think again!---coz WE thought of it when Man City put the baall into the net for the 3rd time in the 25th minute of the forst half!

We were dreadful!---and conceded after just 2 minutes when the home side simply 'walked the baall' into the net---it waz 2-0 barely 2 mins later when wor defence went 'walk aboot'!

PITCH NUMBER 8 *** THE TOON ATTACK 'THE ACADEMY END'(1st half)
THE CITY OF MANC STADIUM IZ ON THE LEFT WITH
IT'S 'BABY SISTER'  ACADEMY STADIUM TO THE RIGHT  

When the 3rd one went in wor minds flashed back to the previous week when wor forst team were hammered 6-1 'ower the road' in their main stadium!

It waz 'fower-nil' 8 mins into the 2nd period when again 'The Blue Moonies' simply walked through wor defence to score!
A needless penalty given away by Pedrah made the score 5-0 ----and then a miracle happened!---WE actually scored through Lewis McNall who's shot waz deflected past their keeper 3 minutes from full time----but then 'City' hammered the final nail into wor coffin deep into injury time to make it the SAME SCORE az the NUFC forst team just 7 days before!

THE TOON MAKE A RARE 'SORTE' INTO THE MAN CITY BOX (2nd half)

"YELLOW WRIST BANDS AND AALL THAT!"

To get into the complex before the game waz a nightmare, with barriers, fences and locked tornstiles barrin' wor way.
To make sure we got in 'Glennn from Ashington' (who I waz travellin' with) said we shud say that we were related to a Toon player and telt me that wor goalie waz called Brendan Pearson (A'm not 'clued up' aboot the U18s team az it's ages since a'v seen them play!)
"NO ENTRY!"

The guy on the forst barrier asked us who we were, but unfortunately aa had a 'brain warp' and aa waz just aboot to tell him that we were related to a Toon player called Brendan Rodgers!--- but just az aa waz aboot to say 'Rodgers' aa remembered hiz proper name---in the nick of time!--- and so he let us in to park wor motor! ('Phew---it waz a close call!')
The 2nd obstacle waz the tornstile and we had to ring a buzzer to get through to somebody on an intercom---again we telt him we were related to a Toon player! ---and he 'buzzed us in'!

The 3rd and final obstacle waz in reception, where again we telt the lassie behind the desk that we were related to a Toon player.
She told us to hold wor hands oot so she could place 2 yellow plastic bands around wor wrists! (honest--aa felt like a tagged prisoner!)---and pointed us in the direction of 'Pitch 8' where the game waz to be played! (The yellow wrist bands bein' wor 'tickets' to get in!)---aall this hassle just to watch an academy game!

"SING IN THE BUS STOP!"

It waz disappointin' to say the least that the game waz NOT gannin to be played at the 7,000 capacity Academy Stadium az we expected, but instead on one of the many floodlit pitches on the complex next to it!
The facilities were fantastic though--and aall the pitches had  seated shelters for aboot 50 spectators-------never mind!---we can aalways gan back sometime in the future when wor U21s play at The Academy Stadium---(az lang az we divvint lose 6-1 again!)


ROTTEN FROM THE TOP TO THE BOTTOM!

Some damnin' stats for wor 1st team, U21s and U18s:
Between them to date, they have won just ONE game oot of a possible TWENTY TWO played this season!---The ANLY success comin' from a solitary 3-2 win for wor U18s v Man Utd U18s in September!

PS: One of the 3 mad-sad groundhoppers, namely 'Byzy', had been to the Ing-er-land game against Estonia the neet before and had travelled up from London for the U18s game.
He waz stoppin' 'on the drink' aall neet, az he didn't have a hotel booked--and then he waz off to Lithuania from Liverpool airport at '6 bells' on Sunday mornin' for anothaa Ing-er-land game on the Munday neet! (Dedication?---OR!---shear stupidity?)

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