Wor forst 'fix' of the season waz doon in deepest Bortley on the southern ootskirts of Gatesheed, where a friendly fixture had been arranged against 'The Bad Blue Boys of Dunston'.
The meetin' place waz The Hotspur in the Haymarket area of The Toon, where we partook in several 'liquid lubrications' before catchin' the 'X21' bus to Bortley.
We were 'team handed' and apart from 'little ol' me', 'Liam from the Lamp', 'Michael the Mag' and 'The Caped Crusader' were the 'bender squad' for the day!
On arrival we heeded for the appropriately named 'Birtley Ale Hoose' and apart from us there were just a handful of zimmerframeites sittin' in the corner!
(The locals had obviousleee hord that 'The bad Blue Boys' were in toon and had made 'a sharp' exit before we arrived!)
'Blondie Alan the Morris Dancer' then came in the bar to 'boost wor numbers to five'! (aall of us were wearin' 'Dunston blue' of some sort, in the form of jeans, tee shirts and troosers!)
Next stop waz 'The Railway', literally 'six paces away' next door and agen the bar waz deserted apart from a couple of fat gadgies who cowered in the corner az we waalked in! <(beleeeve that and yi'll beleeeve anythin'!)
Wor final 'port o caall' waz the welcomin' sight of 'The William 1V' where the waalls were festooned in Toon pictures, Bobby Robson photos and souviner 'half and half' scarves from various away games! (and not a mackem picture to be seen!)
Agen the bar waz virtually deserted apart from a mothaa with hor baaby in a pram, a middle aged gadgie wearin' an 'Ing-er-land' top and a labrador doggy who came ower to greet us az we plonked worsels doon in the ripped seats!
After a few 'gargels' it waz time to heed for the main event and made for the groond which iz reet next to the East Coast main train line <(Very handy if yi a transpotter az well!)
Bortley ran oot in a 'Celtic' strip while Dunston wore their traditional 'Rangers' blue!--- hardly an Old Firm derby, but a 'Tyne Firm' derby nonetheless!
The Bad Blue Boys scored forst orly on with Bortley equalisin' a few mins later!
However---Dunston's superior class and fitness soon shone through and they end up winnin' five-one az the trains wizzzed past at 100 mph every few minutes!
A crowd of 91 includin' 50 or so 'Bad Blue Boys' witnessed this annialation <('Michael the Mag' counted them!)
After the match we 'back-tracked' to the bars we had been in, before retornin' to The Toon on the 'X21' <(it broke doon in Low Fell and we had to jump on anothaa bus to get back!)
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