Friday, 22 February 2013

THE METAL GURUS 0 THE TOON 1 ( THE TOON WIN 1-0 ON AGGREGATE!)

Updated '1:25pm bells' Friday 22nd February 2013

Ground number 297---Metalist Stadium, Karkiv
SHOLA SCORES FROM THE PENALTY SPOT!

Mee computaa haz now come oot of it's three day hibernation followin' 'The Geordie Times'z retorn from the Ukraine orly this mornin' and the fower hour flight landed @ '2:30am bells' preciselee to even colder temeratures than in Karkiv!

A full mad-sad groundhoppers trip report will follow later and will be updated throughoot the day after aa wake up properly!---

Shola Ameobi'z penalty waz the difference between the two teams az The Toon progressed to the next stage against Anzi (deep breath!)> Makhachkala of Russia

The Toon were backed by a magnificent 500 followin' in the near 40,000 capacity crowd and they had travelled by various expensive and torturous routes across Europe to get here.

Non flyer 'Glennn from Ashington' for example, had set off on Sunday neet to get here via train, ferry and bus and hadn't arrived at hiz hotel til 8 on the mornin' of the game!

He had five hours kip and then waz off to the stadium for some souviners. Hiz bus back to Kiev waz due to leave less than an hour after the match finished and he faced an eight hour trip just to get back to the Ukranian capital!
He telt me that he iz due back on Tyneside with less than an hour to spare before wor game against Soothampton on Sunday @ '1:30 bells'!<(but will he make it!?)<(watch this space!)  

The city of Karkiv az we had foond to wor cost iz virtually 'pub free' and on the day of the match we wandered aboot aimlessly like lost sheep tryin' to work oot wot the signs said when a buildin' looked remotely like a drinkin den!


"HELP!"

After an hour we bumped into 'Bill Quay Kev' who telt us that he waz off to a pub just aroond the corner from where we'd just been!?

And there it waz!----'CINEMA' the sign screeemed, but it waz infact a pub/restaurant in 'diguise' which we unknowingly had waalked past just a couple of minutes orlier, thinkin' it waz a 'cinema'!<(believe it or not!)<(how stupid cud we be?) 
"HA!-HA!"-"WE FOOLED YOU!"

A few 'liquids' in here<(at rip off prices of £3 a pint!) and we were off to anotha unpronounceablee named boozer which we HAD FOOND the neet before, which waz just up the street from wor hotel and waz less than £1 a pint!

It waz then off to the match some three miles from the city centre where the 'secret police' were waitin' in their hundreds for us!<(there waz more of them than us!)


Wearin' wor traditional black n white stripes, we started off the brighter and attack the goal to the far end of us, but then the home side woke up and had a couple of chances near the end of the half. (half time 0-0)
THE TOON ATTACK THE METALIST GOAL
DURIN' THE 1st HALF

We'd sent a stronger team than aa thought would be there and at last we seem to be takin' this competition seriously!
Marveaux the Magician had a great chance to put us in the lead az we attacked the end where we were housed, huddled in the corner suroonded by the dibble and stewards!

HUNDREDS OF METALIST FANS 'IN THE PINK'
(middle of pic) STRIP OFF IN THE
SUB ZERO TEMPERATURES!

The deadlock waz finally broken halfway though the second period when a blunder by a Karkiv defender gave us a penalty 
His intended back pass to hiz goalie went astray and the goalie needlesly pulled Sissoko doon in the box near the touchline az the baall ended up near him.
The ref pointed straight to the spot and up stepped 'Penalty King Shola'<(I carnt remember him missin' one!) to place the baall to the left of their keeper to put us one-nil up to huge celebrations from the away contingent<(we naa aall the big words!)

This meant we had the vital away goal and that Metalist must now score twice to gan through!
A few scarey moments near the end didn't help wor 'tickers' but Tim Krul in The Toon goal pulled off some magnificent saves and we held oot til the final whistle!
THE TOON FANS CELEBRATE AFTER THE FINAL WHISTLE!

After the usual half hour 'lock-in' we were escorted back to the waitin' coaches which whisked us off to the airport for wor '11:30 bells' flight yem!
News filtered through on the plane that Anzi from Russia had drawn in Hannover in the later kick off and therefore we would be off to Moscow in just two weeks time to play them!<(visas @ the ready!)

Toon team: Krul, Simpson, Yanga, Coloccini, Haidara, Sissoko, Anita (Perch 75), Cabaye (Bigiramana 87), Marveaux, Shola Ameobi, Cisse (Gutierrez 75)

Attendance: 39,973 (500 very happy Toon fans!)

Like aa say!---aa'll be dein' a full trip report which might take a few days to compile az quite a lot happened---(like 'Sarnie Steve' lockin' himsel in the hotel's bog!) 

More Karkiv pics below!
KARKIV'S ANSWER TO SAINSBURY'S--AN OLD WOMEN SELLS HOR WARES FROM A TABLE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET!


A CONCRETE PILLAR IZ STRAPPED TO A TELEGRAPH POLE
 TO STOP IT FROM FAALLIN OWER (ONE OF MANY LIKE THIS!)



   

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